AN

Update 1 of 2

Ok, so I have to admit, I thought I had done something wrong as people seemed to think this was the end of Leah's journey . . . It's not! As far as I am concerned there are still some loose ends that need tying up, but for now lets catch up with Cris and see how he is handling things!

Thank you as always reviewers and my lovely beta!

Cris POV

I ran with Leah for hours, it was evening when we took off but before we knew it the sun was coming up and we both stopped to admire it. Forgetting the miles between us we silently watched it together.

I missed her incredibly; her smell, moods, presence, but being in her mind for the last month was a whole new experience to before. I was pleased to find that generally the things she thought were the things she said. She hid some things of course, but then we all had our secrets.

I was so proud of Leah. She had achieved one of her goals and I hoped she would realise she could have a life: there was more to being a wolf than imprinting. Sometimes you have to make your own destiny - I just gave her a shove in the right direction.

'I've got to go. I should have been back hours ago,' Her mind broke through into mine.

'Me too, I'll catch you tomorrow?' I should have changed shifts last night, but no one had come to relieve me.

'I can't, I'm meeting with Clara and then I have work and pack stuff to do. Sorry.' Her tone of thought was disappointed.

'Don't apologise for having a life Leah! I'll catch you soon.'

'Ok Cris, thanks for running with me. Bye.'

'Always a pleasure.'

I phased back into human form and removed my clothes from their usual hiding place. It was a beautiful morning here, and the temperature was well above zero. I took my time and strolled home slowly taking in everything. I had enjoyed La Push, for various reasons, but Barrow would always be home. I loved its barren landscape and the harsh reality of nature here. It gave me a raw primal feeling, knowing that the wolf - and my pack - were built especially to protect this place.

After a few miles, I reached home and was surprised to walk in and find the whole pack waiting for me. At least it answered my question of their whereabouts.

"Someone's got a girlfriend," Alex sang at me.

"Our alpha's a dirty stop!" Dylan was just as amused.

"Knock it off; Leah is not my girlfriend. Now, if you all value your tails you'll tell me why you are in my house at this ungodly hour and why no one came out on duty last night?" I asked, irritated.

Corey walked into the room and slapped me on the back affectionately; "Ask Jaden. Turns out, someone learnt about betting while they were in La Push."

"Jaden?" I growled.

I was beginning to feel tired and my house full of noisy skin walkers, eating breakfast and lolling about, did not please me.

Jaden shrugged nonchalantly, "What? I just bet what time you would be home; they all stayed to see who won."

"Speaking off which, pay up." Shay came out of the bathroom and towered over his cousin.

"No way, I was right. I said quarter past." Lee had finally looked up from his breakfast and joined in.

Shay disagreed, "No! You said quarter to. I said quarter past."

The usual squabble broke out and I used the opportunity to slip into my room and shut the door. I threw off my clothes and climbed into bed before collapsing. I had closed my eyes when there was a knock at the door.

"What?" I grunted.

Corey poked his head in. "Sorry Suka, just wanted to say I'll take the pack for the day if you want to just chill out. You took nearly double your share of the shift last night, which is my fault anyway; I knew you were with Leah and wanted you guys to have some time together."

"It's fine, I figured that much. Thanks for the offer; I'll be up in a bit though." I didn't want to put the pressure on Corey, although I appreciated that he was trying with the beta thing.

"No, seriously it's fine! I like managing things. I told you Cris, I'm really going to buck my ideas up, but you've got to trust me as well."

I looked at my brother and nodded. In some ways it was nice to have a day off, but I knew where my thoughts would be.

I closed my eyes again as Corey shut the door.

Was he really the same person as two months ago?

No, I didn't believe any of us were. Even the guys that didn't come down to La Push had changed. We had been opened up to another world, somewhere different, yet similar to Barrow. All of us learnt more than we expected.

I drifted into a deep sleep, knowing I could get up when I wanted.

I dreamt of the same grey wolf - that often haunted me. Further into the dream I was standing on a porch with the wolf as it turned into a girl. She was beautiful and was leaning up to kiss me. In my dream I never pulled away. Instead, I gave in and despite my better judgement I kissed her back. It all turned into a nightmare at that point; the girl fell into a hundred pieces at my feet. My kiss had broken her and now she lay shattered before me.

I woke up in a sweat and panicking, but then I realised the kiss never happened and it was just a dream. I sat up and ran my hand through my hair, relieved that I never let it happen.

Part of me knew I was nuts.

I had wanted to kiss her even before the porch incident, but as always I kept my distance. The hardest time was the night of the ice cream fight; seeing her flat on her back laughing made my heart swell. Each day I spent with her, her smile had gradually crept back into her eyes; it was such a contrast to the empty brown eyes of the drunken girl I met at the party.

I had no doubt my feelings for her had grown into more than intended. It didn't matter though; Leah had made it clear from the very start that she needed a friend. She needed someone she could trust and that would keep an objective view and help her - she picked me.

As a warning to me, I needed only to look at Jake. He had already broken her trust by kissing her and that was after years of friendship. I was not going to make the same mistake, so I deliberately avoided her kiss on the porch and reminded her of the things she had told me. It went against every instinct and urge that I had, but her happiness was worth it.

Within days of returning to Barrow, I quickly realised how big a part of my life she had become and the true meaning of my feelings. I spent my hours counting down to the next time we could talk and wondering about her day. I was pretty sure I was falling for her and I would do anything for that woman to be happy.

That was essentially why I couldn't be with her - not only were our obligations miles apart, but as much as I hated it, there was still the possibility of either of us imprinting.

Overall, there was just too much risk, so I refused to look to her for more than friendship.

Besides, who's to say she would even reciprocate my feelings, she might have just been caught in the moment, and so what if she did?

Leah wouldn't recover from heartbreak a third time, and she had come too far to let anything drag her backwards - especially me.