Nessie's POV

I was so hungry I felt sick, or so sick I felt hungry - I really wasn't sure anymore. I'd been in the dark for so long I'd lost count of time. My only regularity was the beatings I received. It made sense what they were doing. Anna had explained it so happily.

Every time they beat me, my body tried to heal, but to do so it needed energy. Normally, my energy would be replenished by food, but because that wasn't available I was starving. It was only sheer willpower that restrained me from diving at the glass of warm blood they left in my room after each visit. I could smell it was human and fresh. At the beginning it hadn't been such an issue, but as the time passed it became harder to resist it. My throat felt so parched and the crimson liquid looked so nourishing.

Staying sane was becoming harder and harder. I spent my hours picturing my family and Jake in my head. I drifted in and out of sleep, but my stomach continued to feel like it was shriveling up and the pangs that came with it were excruciating.

At one point, I even considered drinking my own blood until I realized that was pointless and also just as depraved.

A huge part of me missed Leah's presence, not only because she always seemed to know what to do, but because I liked her too. She had always been so honest with me and I admired her tenacity. That's why I'd approached her about Jake - she wouldn't hide the truth from me. I knew it was stupid to be thinking about something that was so irrelevant right now, but I couldn't help it. Things changed so quickly for me I was constantly learning something, be it about people, emotions or appropriate behavior. Other people had decades to learn it all and grow up, I had just one.

Even in the time that Jake had moved to Denali with us, things had changed. When I first arrived back in Forks to confess my feelings to him they had still felt so new and undiscovered; now that I had spent time with him romantically, they had changed yet again. I was in a relationship, seeing a different side of Jake who was no longer my doting babysitter. I was also realizing that my life had been far from black and white as had his. My childhood innocence was all but gone. There was more to life than just me and realizing that had brought out not only my insecurities, but made me question what the imprint really meant.

I guess what had upset me most was seeing how naturally he and Leah fit together; deep down under his skin a part of him loved her. Even I could see why. It was always so easy for them to be together - even on the telephone they had chemistry. She could make him angry and volatile and just as quickly turn him into a puppy. I didn't have that kind of control over Jake. Jake could never get angry at me, he could never be himself truly, the imprint wouldn't allow it. I knew how selfish that made me, but I couldn't help but love him. The irony was that wanting him to love me too, meant he did. I would never know if that was for me, all faults included, or out of obligation.

It's the exact reason why I'd been willing to try and break the imprint. If Leah and him had a chance then I would do it. Hell, I was willing to do it for Jake alone so that he had a choice. It would probably break my heart if he didn't want me, but that would be better than an eternity of lies.

I remembered well what Leah had said. She admitted she loved Cris and that Jake was nothing more than her best friend. She had said he'd chosen me. Had he? If I'd have bothered to find out instead of thinking I could handle the situation things might have been different. It was amazing how stupid and naive I'd been. Thanks to me we were all in trouble now.

I just prayed that everyone was ok. I'd heard nothing about any of the girls since they dragged Leah away. I was alone and isolated, hanging on to Leah's instructions to stay calm and collected. She was so strong and had given me courage so easily, but it was dying quickly. I didn't know how much longer I could hang on, even though I knew I had too.

All of the sudden, screaming could be heard from another room. There were three sets of voices crying out. I curled into a ball, gripping my hair in my hands, trying not to tug it out. I recognized the voices and my breathing started to accelerate. I heard movement outside, footsteps dragging a flailing crying body. I could smell the fear from the person as they passed my door and, dear god, the throbbing sound of an elevated heartbeat which was pumping fresh warm blood through veins at speed. The taste would be so sweet, so ripe. I purposely and desperately began to bang my own head back against the wall, trying to regain focus. The pain helped to bring me back somewhat, but I still shoved my fist in my mouth as I fought back the saliva pooling inside. I had never believed I was a monster until this moment.

Eventually, the sound of the throbbing heartbeat returned, but this time, the steps stopped outside my door. Keys jangled at the lock. The door swung open.

Kim was held tightly against a leech who threw her in the room.

"Dinner time!" He sneered.

Kim hit the floor hard and the door slammed shut locking her in with me. My throat constricted, my nostrils flared. My eyes trailed down, the way she held her leg highlighted an injury, a weakness, and she was bleeding.

She looked up at me. "Nessie?"

I turned my face away and crawled further into my corner, trying to disappear into the wall. I scrambled at the bricks desperately. I had to control my urges.

She moved closer. "Nessie?"

I felt the air move and glanced her way; her fingers were reaching towards me.

"Don't touch me," I hissed.

Kim looked frightened and edged backwards slowly. Her tears had stopped, but I could still hear the shuddering of her breath and pounding heart. She was scared. My internal thoughts were working out the best way to kill her, she would make such an easy prey. The human had no escape.

The human...

I was failing to see her as a person. I was losing myself.

"Tell me something. Anything..." I pleaded, closing my eyes.

Kim sat there, her red puffy face looked so lost. "The packs are coming."

I sat up, looking directly at her. My hunger calmed. "Jake?"

Kim nodded slowly. "I think so. Leah was shouting Jaden's name and Joham's not pleased. I think... I think they've found us."

I breathed deeply. Kim's own heartbeat had calmed, which helped me regain myself.

There was one thought which had been constant in my mind. "Have you seen my Mom anywhere?"

Her face paled.

"Please," I begged. "Tell me if you know something."

Kim looked sick. "Nessie, I'm so sorry. She's de..."

"No." I shook my head angrily before she could finish. "No!"

She started to cry again and nodded.

I moved towards her faster than I could even process. My hand gripped her arm, pulling her to full height as I looked into her wide scared eyes. The truth looked back. My grip tightened.

It wasn't until Kim gasped in pain that I realized I was hurting her. Stepping back, I fell to the concrete floor. My body kept going until I lay flat out, staring at the almost pitch black ceiling. My head spun. The ceiling swirled before my eyes. Emotions drove through my whole body and eventually a choking noise erupted around me.

I didn't understand who was making the noise until I realized it was me. Tears were falling down my cheeks and my chest felt like it was splitting open; I had never felt more human. Even my hunger was gone.

"Mom," I whispered to myself over and over again.

"Get up." I opened my eyes. Anna was standing over me. I tried to focus, my head felt heavy, my body felt weak and my brain felt foggy.

I stood reluctantly. My legs shaking beneath me. My eyes found Kim beside me, standing rigid. After a moment, I felt fingers probing at my hand. I looked down. Kim was reaching out to me. I gripped her hand in mine.

"Move," Anna ordered, grabbing my arm and dragging me out the door. As soon as we left the cell, we were surrounded by other vampires and half breeds. I cast my eyes back down the corridor. They were digging up the ground, it didn't make sense.

I kept a tight hold of Kim as we were dragged into a bright room. I could only blink and stagger as I was pulled along. There were more stairs, then we were shoved into a new room. My eyes were still adjusting to the light. Kim and I continued to hold on to each other. I had no idea what was happening.

Confused, I sat down on the sofa in the room. Kim joined me in silence.

After a while I had to ask, "About Mom, how did it happen?"

Kim sighed. "There's time for that later."

I grasped her hand tightly. "Please, I have to know."

Eventually, Kim seemed to relent. "Bella came across us in the forest and tried to stop the vampires from taking us. She was so brave, Nessie. She fought continuously and wouldn't give up. There were just too many of them. It's no consolation I know, but you should be proud of her."

"I am." I nodded. I somehow managed to push through my grief. "I didn't mean to hurt you before. I was struggling not to bite you. Are you ok?"

She looked a little uncomfortable and shifted away ever so slightly. "I've been better." She paused. "It's Emily I'm worried about. She's real sick. Leah was in the cell next to us. She never really said how she was though."

"Sounds like Leah," I said sadly.

We sat in silence again. My grief seemed to have numb my thirst and reminding myself that Kim was a person and a friend made things easier. The weight of my Mom's death wasn't going anywhere though, but then neither were we.

Sometime later, the door opened forcefully making both Kim and I jump. Anna stormed in furiously. She eyed me in disgust and before I could react, she grabbed me by my hair, dragging me out of the room. I tried to fight her, but I was too weak. Kim tried to follow, calling out for me, grabbing my other arm.

Anna noticing her attempt laughed cruelly before shoving her off and backwards into the room. I heard Kim cry out as the door slammed shut behind me and then a loud thump as she threw herself against it, begging not to be left behind.

I was confused and disorientated, trying to get my bearings. Anna seemed oblivious to my struggle and continued to roughly pull me backwards through the building. I tried to kick out at her again, but was still to weak.

I felt my spirit sink as I realized I was useless. I had done nothing, but brought this hell among us. We were in the forest by now, having left the mansion through some side door. The trees loomed up around us threateningly. I found myself desperately thinking about Mom, but the pain was too much for me to contain. I found my hands wandering of their own accord.

Anna didn't even notice my fingers as they crawled up her arm. She was completely focused on wherever she was taking me, her fingers gripping into the flesh of my arm as she dragged me along.

My fingers found her shoulder, then her neck, before creeping up to her temple. She screamed at the contact, releasing me. My free arm swung around, my hand mirroring the other on her head. She started flailing her arms, trying to claw at me as she continued to hiss and break my hold. Thoughts of Mom, my pain, my hate, my disgust for everything poured through. I was overwhelmed, but completely determined she would share in my hell.

Somehow, Anna managed to get her hands around my throat. My hands didn't break contact, but as she tightened her fingers around me, I felt my air supply dwindling. Both of us were determined the other would break first. I continued to bombard her with wave after wave of my thoughts. As something I thought stung her, she stopped throttling me and punched me instead. The blow sent me to the forest floor and before I could react she was on me. I was pinned to the floor as her hands once again gripped my throat. My legs kicked out from under her and I managed to twist my hands around and press into her temple once more. This time I was more focused and imagined every nightmare I had ever had and the feelings they had provoked in me. Anna started to curse. Finally, I threw at her my latest torment, her brother half dead, laying on our table.

She recoiled from me. "You, little Rat, how dare you. I don't care what Father says. I will kill you. You and your demented little thoughts."

She continued to swear when the sound of a branch snapping nearby distracted us both. Anna spun around, facing the forest with her back to me.

My eyes searched the trees as well. Finally, I saw her. "Leah!"

Anna was too quick she flew at Leah, snarling and clawing at her skin before shoving her to the ground. Somehow, Leah managed to roll away though. My breath caught when Anna didn't follow. She lay instead on the floor, a spear sticking out of her body and blood oozing out rapidly. Anna tried to move, but she was in too much pain and fell back down. She seemed to contemplate what to do and then surprised me by curling into herself on her side.

Leah had barely glanced my way and was trying to decide what to do next. She was looking for something, an angry glare in her eye. I couldn't help but take in her ferocity. She looked deadly.

My body was still trying to heal and I was about to reach out to her, when cold dead fingers wrapped back around my throat, pushing against the bruising already in place. I was lifted from the ground in shock. Joham stared back.

"You have really shitty timing," Leah snarled in the background.

Joham's focus left me and looked between Anna and Leah, shaking his head.

"Father, help me..." Anna pleaded.

I was horrified when Joham simply sneered at her. He was more interested in Leah, so I used the only chance I had to distract him. My fingers reached out for his face. I imagined nothing but burning and pain. It worked. Joham dropped me.

Before I could even move, Leah had tackled him.

"Nessie, run," she yelled.

I had to get help or some kind of weapon so I flew back towards the house desperately. I hadn't gone far when I caught movement in the distance of the trees. My eyes blinked rapidly at the moving blur.

"Grandpa?" It wasn't possible. The blur kept moving, but I knew it was him. "Grandpa!" I yelled.

At the sound of my voice, he turned in my direction and ran to me. I'd barely managed to process that he was actually here when I was pulled into his strong arms. I sobbed against him at the relief. My family was really here. Carlisle held me softly against him and rubbed my back. After a while, he checked me over swiftly for injuries. He had growled at the bruises on my throat. Not long after, I felt a second pair of hands on me. I turned and was moved into Esme's hold.

I hugged her desperately as I cried, "Mom's dead."

"Oh, sweetheart." She soothed, her voice cracking. "It's going to be ok."

"Now we know what Edward must have heard in that vampire's head," Carlisle murmured solemnly. "No wonder he took off."

I peaked at him throw Esme's hold. Carlisle looked deeply saddened and worried as he glanced into the forest.

"My father's out there?" I whispered in horror. I pulled away from Esme. "We have to help him."

Carlisle shook his head. "You need to go back to the boat and wait for us. I'll get him."

"No," I cried.

"He's right, love," Esme said quietly. "We need to go back to the boat. There might be injured people and we need to help them and protect them. Carlisle will help your father."

I looked between them and my shoulders sunk. I knew they would never let me go and I realized that it was my own fault we had ended up here. I couldn't bring myself to argue. I nodded reluctantly in agreement.

Esme walked over and kissed Carlisle, she met his eye. "Be careful."

He kissed her back, stroking her cheek. "I'll bring him back. I promise. I love you."

I turned away, giving them their moment as they spoke softly.

Once Carlisle had headed into the forest, Esme lead us back swiftly to the boat. We met no resistance on the way back, but we both jumped, grasping each other when a loud explosion erupted in the direction of the mansion.

My heart pounded in my chest. "Jake." I wanted to run to him.

"Come on, Renesmee." Esme gently pulled me away from the sound.

My eyes remained fixed in the direction of the house. When we reached the cliff, we followed the steep incline down to pier. A large motor boat was moored there.

I spun around as another explosion went off. This time it was too much. "Jake!"

Esme wasn't quick enough. I flew back up the hill towards my heart.

AN

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Beta credit to the awesome Dontcallmeleelee!