Twenty-seven:
The limo ride back to Rick's loft was spent in uncomfortable silence. Rick sat between Mindy and Alexis while Kate sat in the seat facing them. She spent the entire ride staring out the window, unwilling to make contact with the others. Everyone was tired and nerves were frayed. A police cruiser followed the limo to the loft and a uniformed officer had been assigned to stay by the entrance to his floor.
Rick helped the women exit the car and thanked the driver as he returned to the car. Soon they entered the loft decorated for the holiday. Kate remembered how she reacted the first time seeing the loft decorated for Christmas, how much Castle loved the holiday. Rick stopped to face the women as they stood near the door. "It's late and everyone's tired. Beckett, you take my room and I'll sleep out here on the couch. Mother's not coming in until the morning. Let me grab something to change into. You can use one of my old shirts to sleep in, unless you're uncomfortable with that. I'm sure Mindy or Alexis might have something.."
Kate started to protest, but Rick held his hand up to silence her. "No arguments. It's too late and we're all too tired. You can be mad at me in the morning." Rick spoke with no emotion and walked into his bedroom to retrieve something to change into.
Kate stood there and stared at Castle's retreating form. She never remembered Rick being so confident in his actions. All the time he was with her he was willing to be the trusty sidekick, following her lead.
"Rick's right. I'm exhausted. Let's get some rest." Mindy commented looking at both Kate and Alexis. She was a little stung by Castle's offer to Beckett to use his room, but then again it wouldn't be the first time she slept in his bed. All Mindy could hope for was it would be the last. "Goodnight agent Beckett." Mindy turned and walked up the stairs, Alexis following closely behind.
Kate watched as Mindy hugged Alexis at the top of the stairs and kissed her on the cheek before they walked in opposite directions to their rooms. Rick emerged from his bedroom dressed in sleep pants and a tee shirt carrying a blanket and pillow. He stopped when he was standing a few feet away from her and calmly commented. "I laid out one of my old shirts that you used to wear. You know where everything is in the bathroom if you need to take a shower first. I'll be out here on the couch if you need anything."
It took all of her willpower to keep from bursting into tears at his concern for her despite everything that had happened. She had seen first hand how he treated both of his ex-wives. He may not love them, but he still cared for them. She couldn't shake the feeling that she was being placed into that category. Kate closed the gap between the two of them and placed a soft kiss on his cheek as she whispered "I'm so sorry Castle". She quickly turned and nearly ran into the bedroom before bursting into tears.
Rick walked to the sofa laying out the blanket and pillow. He turned off the light in the room and laid there in the dark listening to Kate still sobbing. Castle assumes that Beckett is crying for the loss of her boyfriend and understands that seeing him murdered like that will leave even more emotional scars than she already has. He actually felt sorry for her.
When Kate had nothing left to cry, she rose to her feet and walked into the bathroom past Boba-Fett while carrying the shirt Rick has laid out for her on the bed. She couldn't help but smile at the memory of her first encounter with the life size statue of the Star Wars bounty hunter.
It was the first night they were together as a couple. Nature called, and she had to go to the bathroom. It was still dark out and she didn't want to wake Rick by turning on the lights. She slipped out of the bed and made her way into the room flipping on the light there. She turned to see the statue standing there, his blaster in hand pointing at her and nearly relieved herself without a toilet while letting out a scream. Rick jumped from the bed hearing her scream and ran to see what had happened. He couldn't help but laugh at the sight on Kate on the floor afraid of his 'bodyguard'.
But then he saw the genuine fear in her eyes and realized how she had just survived an attempt on her life. He rushed to her and scooped her into his arms, rocking her like a child while apologizing over and over. "I'm so sorry Kate. I should have warned you, but things got pretty heated and the last thing on my mind was my bathroom bodyguard. I'll remove him in the morning. Can you forgive me? Please?"
The sincerity in his pleas for forgiveness were her undoing. Kate seemed to melt into his arms as he continued to ask for her forgiveness. She looked up to see that he was nearly in tears and kissed him. "It's ok Castle. I should have known that you would have a booby-trap of some type in your bathroom."
"Do you forgive me? Are we ok?"
Kate couldn't help but smile at the way he looked at her like a child asking for forgiveness from his mother. "I'll let you off the hook.. This time, but I still need to take care of business."
"Say no more Kate. Say no more. I'll leave you to your 'business'." He helped her to her feet and walked back to the bed.
A quick glance at her reflection in the mirror brought her back from her trip down memory lane. She stood there with swollen and puffy eyes, her mascara streaking down her cheeks, staring at the huge dark blood stain on her very expensive dress. She looked at the dried blood still in her cuticles from the poor cleaning job she had done earlier. Her familiarity with his bathroom made it easy to setup the shower just the way she liked it as she slipped out of her clothes. Kate sighed as the water started caressing her fatigued body from the showers multiple heads. She held the shampoo bottle to her nose and inhaled the scent. Castles scent. She stood there several minutes just letting the water wash over her as she tried to understand why she was here, now.
Exiting the shower, she wrapped herself in one of Rick's oversize plush towels. She forgot how much she liked these towels, how much she missed his place. Deciding to forego putting on her dirty underwear, she slipped on the shirt Rick had left for her and finished drying her hair as she walked back into his bedroom. Staring at the empty bed, she was filled with a feeling of deep sadness at what she had given up in her quest to find justice for her mother. Crawling into his bed, she snuggled into what had been her side of the large bed. Kate pulled his pillow close to her and inhaled his scent. Her body seemed to relax as she hugged the pillow close to her body. Exhaustion soon took over and she was fast asleep in the one place she truly felt safe.
The smell of freshly brewed coffee and quiet conversation out side Rick's bedroom wakes Beckett from her sleep. She stretches like a cat enjoying the feel of Castle's sheets against her body. For the briefest of moments she forgot that this wasn't her bed and why she was there. There was a knock on the door and a smiling Martha Rodgers poked her head in the door. "Kate, darling, it's so good to see you. I brought you something.." Martha extends a steaming cup of coffee to Beckett."
Kate reaches for the cup, taking it one hand and places the cup under her nose to enjoy the aroma. "Thank you Martha, you're a life-saver." Kate took a sip of the liquid and smiled. "It's perfect. Just the way I like it."
"Don't thank me. Rick made it for you. I'm just the delivery boy."
Kate had to admit she was more than a little touched that he would make her coffee for her the exact way she liked it. Especially after everything that had happened between them. "Tell Castle thank you for me. That it's perfect."
"Will do kiddo. Oh, they dropped off your bag of clothes earlier. I'll bring them to you so you can get dressed if you like. You may want to check Richard's closet and see if he has a robe you can wear if you like. There's a breakfast buffet on the counter getting cold as we speak so you better hurry."
"Thank you Martha.. For everything."
"Sure thing darling. Now hurry, I don't know how long I can hold them off from opening presents." Martha replies as she closes the door leaving Kate alone.
Kate gets out of the bed still clutching the coffee mug in her hand. It was the first good cup of coffee she has had since leaving New York. Or honestly since she split with Castle. She walked to his closet and looked inside. Only half of it was full. The section that he had set aside for her was empty as if he expected her to reclaim the space. 'The road to hell is paved with good intentions.' That was one of Johanna Beckett's favorite sayings. Kate could see her mother saying those words to her in response to why she left Castle in the first place. She had been so caught up in putting away the man that ordered her mother's murder that she lost sight of what she was losing.
Before she could dwell any more on the past, Kate grabbed one of Castle's robes and slipped it on. It was huge, but oddly comfortable as she tied the sash around her waist to secure it. She opened the door and walked to the kitchen. Rick and Mindy were having a debate of some sort and Alexis adding an occasional comment, obviously taking the tall blonde's side in the discussion. The younger Castle noticed Kate enter the room first and stopped talking. Rick looked up and smiled. It was a sad smile, but it felt genuine. "Beckett, did you sleep ok?"
Kate tried to put on a happy face but could tell she was failing. "I slept very well. And thanks for the coffee. It was just what I needed."
"Sure thing. There's a ton of food sitting around here." He gestures to the breakfast bar and kitchen counter. "Grab yourself a plate. You know where everything is.."
Kate notices that both Alexis and Mindy were watching her every move. She thanks Rick and walks to the cabinet to retrieve a plate and silverware. Mindy smiles at Kate and continues to talk to Alexis and Martha. Beckett is a little taken back by the easy way the three women seem to be around each other. She was always a little intimidated by the two Castle women despite Martha's attempts to make her feel comfortable. Kate was just ready to sit down at the breakfast bar when she sees Castle return to the room.
"Kevin just left me a text message. He'd like for you to come down to the 12th after noon sometime to give your statement, then you are free to fly back to DC, or wherever you planned on going.. It's a little after ten right now so you should have plenty of time."
Kate offered him a small smile and thanked him. Rick left the women as he walked to his bedroom to change. Martha sees just how alone Beckett looks sitting there and decides to try and include her in the conversation. "Kate, darling, were you planning on staying in New York for the holiday?"
"No Martha, My dad's with his brother's family upstate. I was going to fly out as soon as the party was over."
Curiosity now peaked, Martha has to ask. "Were you going somewhere for the holiday? Or shouldn't I ask?"
The way Martha asks the question causes both Alexis and Mindy to look directly at Kate to see her response. "I, um, was going to spend a couple of days in Bermuda."
Martha arches her eyebrows in surprise. She knew what wasn't said, that she and Vaughn were going there together. Knowing just how much Beckett has already hurt her son, she schooled her emotions and simply replies. "Oh, that sounds lovely."
Alexis can only glare at her grandmother who returns the look with a shrug. The women sat there and finished their food in an uncomfortable silence.
The look on Martha's face nearly broke Kate. She knew that the woman had been her champion for years, defending her to Rick. The pained look that Martha couldn't hide told her that she was done. As bad as Beckett felt sitting there, Mindy felt equally out of place. She knew that there was a history amongst these women that she was only now seeing in painful bits and pieces. The woman sitting at the end of the counter quietly eating her food looked nothing like the one that Rick had described. She honestly expected to see her in tights and a cape the way he spoke about her. He loved her deeply and she had broken him. The only thing Mindy didn't know was if he was still in-love with Beckett.
A loud knock on the door brought everyone's attention to it. Rick walked out of his bedroom fully dressed in jeans and a dress shirt and opened the door. He couldn't contain his smile upon opening it. "It's good to see you agent Shaw. How long has it been?"
He pulls the door open for her to enter. "Four years Mr Castle. I should have known that you'd have something to do with me being dragged away from my family on Christmas morning." She comments sarcastically, but then gives him a wry smile.
"So you're taking over the case? Cool." Rick comments a little too enthusiastically.
Shaw gives Castle a stern look as she scans the loft in full Christmas décor. "Nice digs Mr Castle.. I guess being a writer pays pretty well?" She then sees Beckett sitting at the breakfast bar with three women she doesn't know.
"I'm sure that you're not here to debate the financial rewards of being a novelist." He turns and walks into the kitchen, Jordan following behind still looking around the loft. He stops at the counter and the women all look at him, except Kate. "Allow me to introduce you to everyone. My mother, Martha Rodgers, my daughter Alexis, and my close friend Mindy King." He gestured to each woman as he introduced her to them. "And of course you know agent Beckett."
The normally unflappable Jordan Shaw was confused. This blonde woman that he introduced as his 'close friend' was here with Kate Beckett, eating breakfast together on Christmas morning with his mother and daughter? This was too weird, even for Castle. Shaw gave Castle and Beckett a stern look like 'you've got some explaining to do. Kate simply nodded and Rick shrugged his shoulders like a child being reprimanded for something he didn't do.
"Would you like a cup of coffee?" Castle inquires.
"Sure, with just a little cream. Thanks." Shaw replies as she walks to Kate and extends her hand. "Agent Beckett it's good to see you."
Beckett shakes her hand and replies. "It's good to see you too, although I wish the circumstances were different."
Jordan takes in Kate's appearance. The woman that she always saw so neatly put together was nowhere to be seen. Beckett was wearing an oversized robe that she could only guess was Rick's, her hair looked like a rat's nest, and she looked like she hadn't slept in a month. Her face looked gaunt and pale. It was obvious that she had lost weight since the last time she saw her. Jordan knew that Castle had real feelings for the woman even then and had told Beckett that. When she heard that Kate was at Castle's loft, she assumed that they had finally gotten together. This was all too weird.
Rick handed Shaw her coffee and she thanked him, as Martha tries to make small talk with the FBI agent. "So agent Shaw, I take it that you know my Richard and Katherine?"
"Yes, Ms Rodgers. Your son and agent Beckett worked with me on a case four years ago."
"You remember mother. It was when agent Beckett's apartment was blown up." Rick quickly added.
"Yes, I remember. Katherine came to stay with us.. It was so nice having her here." Martha comments with a wistful tone.
Mindy was a little hurt by the way Martha made her off-hand comment. She knew that Martha still wanted Rick and Kate together despite everything that the woman had done to her son. Alexis gave her grandmother a look that would have melted steel as she rose up from her seat. "I'm going to my room. Let me know if we are going to resume a normal Christmas anytime soon.. It was nice to meet you agent Shaw." Little Castle walked away without a word to anyone else.
Rick starts to follow after his daughter, but is stopped by Mindy's hand on his arm. She gives him an understanding look and rises up from her seat. Castle simply sighs and watches as Mindy goes up the stairs after Alexis. Jordan watches the whole scene unfold in front of her in mild confusion. She needed answers to many things and wasn't sure where to begin.
"Agent Beckett, I have some questions for you. Is there someplace private we can talk?"
"You can use my office." Rick offers as he points to where it is.
"Thank you Mr Castle."
"Please call me Rick, or just Castle."
Kate rises up from her seat and follows the agent into Rick's office. Kate closes the door behind her as she enters the room. Shaw takes a seat behind his desk and pulls a voice recorder from her purse. She provides an introduction for the recording with the date and time so it can be transcribed later. Kate sits down on the sofa facing the desk, a little uncomfortable at the thought of being questioned by Shaw.
Jordan senses Kate's apprehension and tries to calm her. "Don't worry agent Beckett, this is necessary for us to solve this case." Kate nods her head in understanding. "Why don't we start at the beginning?"