Disclaimer: Still don't own Glee
-Marley's POV-
"You can't deny it anymore Marley" he tells me and before I have any time to say or do anything else, he pushed his lips onto mine.
To say I was shocked would be an understanding. I stood there with my hands by my side, not reacting, but after a couple of seconds I found myself slowly starting to kiss him back.
Marley! MARLEY! What the hell are you doing?!
I'm…I'm…what?
What the- STOP kissing him!
Oh…r-right
I pull away abruptly, my eyes wide and my mouth open in shock at what just happened. I look at Jake to see him grinning and before he can say anything else, I'm quickly sprinting out of the room. What the heck just happened?!
…
As soon as I got out of there, I found myself running all the way home and collapsing on my bed. I'd never skipped school before, but I just needed to get out of there. I thought I-no, no I know I love Kitty but I think I might have some feelings for Ja-
Don't say it
But I do, I think I like Ja-
No!
I THINK I LIKE JAKE!
Oh God, see, now you've said it!
I know it's wrong and I shouldn't but…I just do!
Why? The only thing good about that guy is…is…see, I literally can't think of anything good about him!
Oh come on conscience, what about all those things he did for me just so he could go out with me?
That. Was. KITTY!
Maybe but…maybe not, maybe Jake actually likes me
Okay fine, and what if he does? You're just going to drop Kitty for him?
No, of course not! Well…I don't know
I can't believe you!
I'm sorry it's just-
I get brought out of my thoughts by my phone ringing; I pick it up and look at the caller ID. My heart breaks a little when I see that it's Kitty, I feel so damn guilty. Taking in a shaky breath, I put on a fake smile and put the phone to my ear.
"Hi" I speak up, trying my best to sound happy even though the guilt is welling up inside my stomach.
"Hey, where are you?" I hear her ask, concern dripping in her voice.
"I'm at home, I wasn't feeling too good so I came here" I tell her, hoping that the lie was convincing enough.
"Well are you alright? I'm really worried Mar" she tells me and I squeeze my eyes shut to keep my tears at bay from the guilt I feel.
"Yeah I'm…I'm fine now, it was just a…stomach ache, you don't need to worry" I tell her, hearing her sigh on the other end of the phone.
"I'll always worry about you Marley. So I was thinking after my lesson with the special teacher I could come over? If that's ok with you and your mom" she rushes out the last part, making me smile a little. But once I processed what she had asked me, I started stuttering like crazy.
"A-actually Kitty, I-I don't think that's a good idea, I still don't feel too good a-and I just want to be alone right now and um…get some s-sleep" I manage to get out, I feel so bad for saying this to her because I know how she gets after her special lessons and how she needs comfort from me. I hear Kitty suck in a surprised breath before clearing her throat, and I can just imagine her nodding her head in acceptance but also disappointment.
"Oh uh, okay, I'll let you rest then. I hope you feel better and call me if you need me alright?" she tells me with so much worry and love in her voice, that the guilt inside me is timed by a thousand but I can't tell her what happened with Jake and I, and I most definitely can't tell her about my new found feelings.
"Yeah I will…thanks" I tell her, my voice wavering slightly as I feel my eyes start to well up. But I force the tears back and hope that this call would end now so I can just curl up in my bed and think about what the hell I'm feeling.
"I love you" I hear her tell me, making me purse my lips together tightly to not make a sound and I feel a tear drop down my cheek. I didn't say it back because I wasn't sure of anything anymore and I didn't want to lie to her any more than I already I have, I couldn't.
"Alright, I'll uh…I'll see you tomorrow" is all she says before hanging up. I squeeze my eyes together tightly as I feel a few more tears stream down my face; I let out a choked sob and fall back onto my bed. Man, I am such a horrible person.
Can't argue with that
Conscience!
What?! You're the one who said it! I was just agreeing with you
Well…don't! You're supposed to tell me that I'm not a horrible person and I did what I did to protect Kitty's feelings!
Oh so, kissing Jake was protecting Kitty's feelings?
Well…no, but lying about it is…that sounded horrible
Yeah, no kidding. Oh hey since we're on the subject, WHY THE HELL DID YOU KISS HIM?!
Ugh, I don't know ok! I guess all these feelings had built up inside me since the day he sang to me, and then he gave me peonies. Peonies conscience!
Yeah I get it; he gave you some flowers, blah, blah, blah
Conscience! They are not just 'some flowers'! They are my favourite flowers and he remembered!
…Why are you SO dumb?! Kitty remembered, not Jake! Kitty! Remember Kitty? Your GIRLFRIEND
Of course I remember Kitty! I love her remember?
Do you?
…What?
Do you really love her?
…Of course I do!
Then why didn't you tell her that over the phone?
Because I…Well I…I love her okay, I do…I…I…Do I?
…
I made my way down the hallway, all the while thinking about the girl I loved and the boy I was starting to like and how I had no freaking clue about what I was going to do about it. Once I reached my locker, I stopped and turned to look down the hall, searching for a certain blonde. My eyes light it up when I see Kitty at her locker, but as I went to go over to my secret girlfriend, an arm reaching out to rest on the locker next to mine stops me.
"Hey Marley" Jake smirks at me, ugh, of course it's him.
…Ok, how the heck can you like THAT?
I told you! He seems to actually like me
Oh and Kitty actually loving you, isn't enough?
What? Of course it's enough, it's just Jake is…
Gross? Disgusting? Rude? Arrogant? Annoy-
No! He's…I don't know, kind of sweet I guess?
Oh really?
Sometimes…
Name one time and I won't bother you for a month
Okay fine, well…there was the time when…when…I can't think of one right now, but there was definitely a time!
Apparently not, and since I could think of tons of times Kitty's been sweet to you, you should stay with her
I never said I was gonna leave her conscience! I love her and I'm not gonna ruin what we have just because I like some boy
Damn right you're not
"Oh um, hi Jake" I reply, trying to look over his shoulder at Kitty who was now staring at us warily.
"So hey, I was wondering if you wanna go with me to Mr Schue's wedding on Saturday?" I hear Jake ask me, but to be honest I wasn't listening to him. I decided that I would forget about my sort of crush on Jake and continue with my relationship with Kitty. I love her, and I'm not gonna let Jake Puckerman ruin that. Which is why I wasn't listening to a word he was saying.
"Yeah sure, listen I gotta go" I tell him, having no idea what I had just agreed to but I didn't really care. I side stepped past him, heading over to Kitty with a bright smile.
"Hey" I breathe out when I reach her; she looks to me with a matching smile on her face.
"Hey you, how you feelin'?" she asked me, looking concerned and I feel that guilt pang inside me again at how I had lied to her the night before.
"Better, thanks. Turns out I just needed some rest" I tell her, hoping that she'll believe it. Fortunately, she does and smiles at me, closing her locker.
"Good, I was worried about you" she exclaims, leaning her shoulder against the lockers.
"Kitty, I told you not to worry" I chastise her playfully.
"And I told you that I'll always worry about you" she says, smiling a little at me. Before I could say anything else, the bell for first period rang and we began to walk down the hallway.
"So, what did Jake want?" Kitty asks me curiously, I look over to her sheepishly.
"I don't actually know? I wasn't really listening" I reply, smiling as she chuckles a little.
"Haha, you are somethin' Marley Rose" she smiles making me blush a little. We then reach my class and part ways, promising that we'll see each other in glee later. It's weird, spending just a few minutes with Kitty made me remember how much I love her and that I want to be with her so much more than I'll ever want to be with Jake.
Duh
…
I've made a huge mistake-
Yeah, no shit Sherlock
Hey! You had a part in this too, you could have stopped me!
Hey don't go blaming this on me! This was all you
…You are me!
As I was saying, I've made a huge mistake. A few minutes ago, Jake had texted me asking what time he should pick me up on Saturday. I was confused at first, but it didn't take me long to put two and two together. I had accidently agreed to go with Jake to Mr Schue's wedding on Saturday. I haven't texted him back yet, I want to tell Kitty first and see how she reacts.
Well, I'm guessing not well
Hey, you don't know that
Mmhmm
"Hey, you okay?" Kitty whispers from her seat next to me and I snap my head to the side to look at her. She must have seen me looking worried; I'm going to tell her about this but not now, not here in glee. I'll do it when glee's over.
"Yeah, I'm fine" I smile at her slightly, even though I'm freaking out inside. She seems to look unsure, but thankfully lets it go and goes back to listening to whatever Mr Schue's babbling about.
Glee's over too soon and I find myself nervously walking up to Kitty as she waits for me outside the choir room. To be honest I don't know why I'm so nervous, it's not like I'm telling her that I like Jake. Which I don't!
"Hey, what's up?" Kitty asks me once I step out if the door, my mouth gaps open for a few seconds like a fish before I answer her.
"How do you know something's wrong?" I ask her warily, she simply raises her eyebrow at me slightly.
"Because I know you Marley, so what's up?" she asks me again and I stare at her for a few seconds, knowing that I'll have to tell her about me agreeing to Jakes offer to go to Mr Schue's wedding with him. I sigh and look down.
"Just…don't get mad, kay? I sort of, maybe agreed to go to Mr Schue's wedding with Jake" I tell her, holding my breath and waiting for her reaction.
"You what?" she half whispered, half yelled. I look at her sheepishly.
"I agreed to go to the wedding with Jake? Look it was when I wasn't listening to what he was saying and I accidently said yes to going with him, I'm sorry" I rush out quickly, hoping that she won't be angry with me. Luckily, she seems to calm down after I tell her this and smiles a little at me.
"It's ok, you can just tell him no now right?" she asks me, looking kind of hopeful and I have no idea why I say what I say next.
"Actually, I can't" I tell her quickly, she looks at me with her eyebrows furrowed, confused.
"Um, why not?" she asks me and I look down to the ground, trying to come up with a good excuse for what I said. Not being able to find one in my stupid brain-
Hey, don't go blaming this on me!
Ugh! Fine, not being able to find a good excuse, I just say the first thing that comes to mind.
"I don't know" I mumble.
Wow, great excuse
Oh, shut up
"What do you mean you don't know Marley? I mean…do you want to go with him?" she asks me, looking unsure and a little broken. I feel that familiar feeling of guilt settle upon me again and I quickly try to explain.
"No of course not! I just…I…I don't know" I say again, Kitty looks at me confused and I can see a little hurt in her eyes, which kills me that I'm the reason it's there.
"Fine, I…I gotta go to my special lesson, I'll see you later I guess" she offers weakly before turning around and walking down the hall while I watch helplessly after her. Why did I do that?!
…
-Kitty's POV-
Jesus, why did I do that? I shouldn't of just walked away from her, she probably can't tell Jake no because she's the sweetest person in the world and she doesn't want to hurt his feelings. Yeah, that's gotta be it.
What if it's not?
What?
What if she does actually like the guy?
Conscience! Of course she doesn't like him, she wouldn't lie to me
Okayyy, but what if she does?
Then…then…she doesn't okay!
Okay, fine but don't come crying to me when she dumps your ass
Would you shut up! She wouldn't dump me, we love each other!
Yeah, yeah okay whatever; now carry on with your monologue
Fine, I will. So anyway, I want to make it up to Marley for just storming out on her, it took me all night but I finally finished my gift to her. I was planning to show it to her today, after school. Speaking of Marley, I see her messing around with stuff in her locker down the hall and I quickly walk over to her, a smile already making its way onto my face from just seeing the girl.
"Hey Mar" I greet her, smiling at her sheepishly. She seems surprised to see me but smiles a little.
"Hi…you're not mad at me anymore?" she asks me hesitantly, biting her lip making me feel guilty again for storming off on her.
"I was never mad at you before, jealous sure but not mad" I assure her and I see her let out a small sigh of relief. Ah screw it; I'm not waiting till after school, we'll just have to miss first period.
"I wanna show you something" I tell her, taking her by the hand and gently pulling her out the school doors.
"Where are we going?" she asks confused but also sounding a little curious which makes me smile slightly as I continue leading her down the street.
"You'll see" is all I tell her before we're walking down the street casually and chatting about things like glee and Valentine's Day.
Once we get to our destination, the meadow, I gently tug on her hand which is now linked in mine and pull her over to the big tree which had my art smothered on.
"Did you…" Marley trails off, looking at what I had done. All night I had been thinking of something I could do to make it up to Marley, and then I thought about how I hadn't technically done anything for her for Valentine's Day just yet, so I rushed down here and did what I did best. Art. In the tree, I had carved a large heart, and written inside that heart in scripted writing were the words 'Marley and Kitty forever'. It had taken me a while, a few hours maybe, but Marley was so worth it.
"I did, I wanted to make up for just walking out on you, I realized that you're just too sweet of a person to say no to Jake" I smile at her, but furrow my eyebrows a little when she gets that weird look on her face again, she's been doing that for a few days now and I have no idea why. But that weird look seems to be swept away because then her mouth gaps open and closed once she looks back at the tree again, I'm guessing she's at a loss for words and I hope that that's a good thing.
"Marley, I'm not entirely sure if you like this or not so if you could maybe tell me that would be great" I laugh nervously and she seems to come out of her shock, her head snapping to the side to look at me. Luckily, I can see that sparkle in her bright blue eyes that I love so much, which I know is definitely a good thing.
"Kitty of course I like it, I love it but this must have taken you such a long time" she says as if she's surprised that I would do this for her, which of course is ridiculous. I would literally do anything for Marley.
Even die?
If it meant that she would live, then definitely
…Wow
Yeah
"It didn't take that long and I was thinking that since I technically haven't done anything for you for Valentine's Day yet, this would fill that space" I tell her, hoping that this was okay and good enough for her. Ha, who am I kidding, nothing in the world is good enough for this girl. But hopefully this comes just a little close.
"Well I love it…and of course you've given me things for Valentine's Day Kitty, you just gave them to me through Jake" she tells me, getting that weird look on her face again. I don't know, it looks like a mix between guilt and fear, which confuses me but I decide to let it go, waving it off for something else. Instead, I just smile warmly at her, taking her hands softly in mine.
"Happy Valentine's Day Marley" I say softly, nearly getting lost in her baby blue eyes.
"Happy Valentine's Day Kitty" she replies just as softly and she leans in resting her head against mine gently. I smile, closing my eyes and leaning in slowly, waiting for her to meet me halfway. She does, and it feels like heaven when her soft, pink lips touch mine. Come to think of it, I hadn't kissed her for three whole days but it felt like forever. I'd missed these lips so much, I didn't think it was possible to miss kissing someone so much, but apparently it was very possible.
After a few moments of softly kissing, we pull away from each other, panting softly. "I love you" I mutter, opening my eyes to look into hers. I only catch a glimpse of those beautiful blue eyes I love so much before she's tightly wrapping her arms around my neck, burying her face into my neck.
"I love you" I feel her mumble back into my neck softly, making me smile happily and hug her back just as tightly around her slim waist. I love this girl so much. Which is why I need to do something else, tell her something else. Something that I've never told anyone before. I pulled her down to sit down on the grass, our backs up against the tree.
"There's something else too, um…y'know the night when I told you about the car crash and you told me about your dad? Well I…I wasn't completely honest with you" I tell her nervously and forcing back tears, I look away from Marley's confused looking face, not being able to look her in the eye.
"What do you mean Kitty?" she asks me softly, I go to speak but choke on my words, shaking my head and looking down at my hands. I see delicate hands reach out and take mine, making me look up to her.
"Hey, you know you can tell me anything right?" she asks me and after a few seconds of looking into her eyes filled with truth, I nod my head softly and take a deep breath, looking away from her again as find the words to speak.
"Well um…my dad didn't exactly die from a car crash, he um…he drowned. When the drunk driver crashed into us, it sent our car over the bridge and into the water. We were trapped, my dad tried to smash the window open but it was no use…all I remember is reaching out and taking my dad's hand and telling him that I loved him, I should have died, I don't know why I didn't, but the next thing I knew I was waking up in a hospital and the doctors were telling me that they found my dad in the car but they found me on the bridge, but I still have no freaking idea how I got there…I'm sorry I didn't tell you the whole story before, to be honest I don't know why I didn't, I guess I just…didn't know how, I'd never told anyone out loud before…so, um, yeah…that's what happened, that's the whole story" I finished, sniffing and looking down, hoping that Marley won't be mad.
The next thing I know, two arms are wrapping themselves around me, bringing me into the comfort of their warm body. I cling to Marley like she's my lifeline as she whispers gentle words into my ear. "I love you Kitty and I am so sorry that you had to go through that, but I'm here for you now okay? You don't have to be alone anymore" she whispers soothingly and I finally let the tears fall, burying my face into her neck.
"I love you so much" I choke out, over joyed that she had been okay with this all and even happier that I wasn't alone anymore. I mean sure, I had my mom but…it was like she had died along with my dad, she wasn't herself anymore. But that didn't matter, I had Marley now. And she would never hurt me.
"Why? You could do so much better than me?" I feel Marley mumble into my shoulder. I pull away from her abruptly, wiping my eyes and staring at her disbelievingly.
"Better? Marley you loved me when no one else did or would. You saw what was deep down inside me when I wasn't even sure about it myself and you accepted me. Believe me, there's no way I could do better. I think you're perfect" I tell her truthfully, making sure that I'm looking her in the eye so she can see how much I truly mean what I'm saying to her. I see her eyes start to tear up, and I begin to worry if I had said something wrong.
"I love you Kitty Wilde" she smiles tearfully and jumps onto me, sending me flying backwards so I'm lying down with her on top of me. It surprises me at first but soon enough we're both laughing wildly, once again enjoying each other's company. Just how I like it.
…
-No One's POV-
Marley walked down the hallway, headed in the direction of Kitty's locker and feeling horrible. After what Kitty had done for her in the meadow and what she had told her, the guilt was eating away at her, she knew she was deeply in love with the girl and she couldn't lie anymore. She was going to tell Kitty that Jake had kissed her…and that she had kissed him back. Even though she knew that she wanted to be with the blonde, she had no idea how Kitty was going to react to this news. But she guessed not very well.
Once she reached her destination, she felt the guilt start to eat away at her again when she saw Kitty look up at her, giving her a smile. Marley couldn't take it anymore; she needed to tell her…but not here.
"We need to talk" is all the brunette says before slowly turning around and walking off in the direction of the choir room, looking back at Kitty as a request to follow her. The blonde does so, slightly confused and scared at what all this was about. Is she going to leave me? What if she's realized that she deserves better than me? The blond wonders worriedly.
Once they are in the choir room, Marley turns around to look at the girl she had fallen for.
"I have to tell you something" Marley says nervously, Kitty stayed silent, unsure of what to say. Marley gestures to the seat in front of her.
"Um, you should sit down" she offers and after a few seconds of staring curiously at the blue eyed brunette, Kitty does so, plopping herself down on the seat directly in front of a nervous looking Marley.
"Marley, what's going on?" Kitty finally speaks up, looking at her secret girlfriend, confusion written all over her face. Marley sucks in a deep breath, looking the blonde in the eye.
"I haven't been completely honest with you either" Marley admits, making sure that she's looking at Kitty. As hard as it is to look the one she loves in the eye whilst telling her this, she knows that she has to. Kitty doesn't say anything, sitting silently and waiting patiently for her girlfriend to tell her what was going on.
"I wanted to tell you sooner but yesterday you did and said all those sweet things, I just didn't want to ruin the moment and…" Marley pauses, watching as Kitty smiles up at her cutely and feeling terrible, okay, here goes Marley thinks to herself, biting her lip.
"Jake kissed me…and I let him" she blurts out, the smile is wiped off Kitty's face, slowly morphing into a confused frown. She looks down, pursing her lips together and nodding her head slightly. After a few seconds of staying sat down, she stands up abruptly and begins to walk out the room silently.
"Kitty…Kitty…D-don't leave" Marley pleads after Kitty, her voice trembling as tears start to fall down her cheeks. But, without looking back, the blonde was already out the door. Marley lets out a broken sob, covering her tear stained face with her hands. The same thought going through her head.
What have I done?
…
A/N: Sup guys! So, I apologize that this update is a little late but I've had a pretty busy week; I have been getting caught up in the world of The Vampire Diaries, I went to see Despicable Me 2 yesterday and I can't remember the last time I've laughed so hard, it was freaking hilarious! I've had sports day at my school and I also got my report card back, all A's baby! Well, apart from one B xp
Thank you so much for all the reviews, I really hope you all liked this chapter and know that the thing about Kitty and her dad's car crash will return later in the story. So what do you think will happen next? Will karley brake up? What's Kitty gonna do? Hmm, I guess you'll just have to wait till the next chapter ;) Love you guys, bye for now :)