Pairing: SasuNaruSasu;
Warning: Feels, reincarnation and sns2k15;
Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me- refer to Trashi... I mean Kishimoto for the rights;
Summary: Sasuke is being haunted by the memories that have passed and it takes a while for him to realize he is not alone on the dream ride.
A/n: As any other chapter, this one, too, is dedicated to sns2k15. Again, if you do not understand what sns2k15 is, then check it out on tumblr. It's a shame a SNS shipper not to know of it!
Enjoy the chapter, but beware... The feel train is real. The feel train is here.
He is five years old, and by that fact alone, he knows he is dreaming. After all, he just turned fourteen, a week ago.
He is running through crowded streets of what he knows is his home (the clan compound, a voice whispers in his mind), in a dark navy shirt, wide collared and with a symbol of a pokeball on the back (an Uchiwa, the voice bristles). He has a carefree smile on his face, his fat cheeks are flushed and there is a bubble in his chest waiting to explode in happiness.
Waking up from that dream is a pleasant experience, and he welcomes the new day and his best friend with a shy, content smile.
He is seven, barely so, and he isn't that happy anymore. In fact, he is terrified and nauseous; everywhere he looks it's a red bath and mangled bodies and the scent of urine is mixing with the scent of iron.
There is a shadow in front of him, a shadow that strikes great panic inside of him and that bubble is already gone, replaced with constant nightmare.
It takes weeks for him to look at Itachi without flinching and the only person he dares to trust is that blonde idiot, who is desperately trying to shake some life into his deathly visage.
It continues so for some time, a mixture of terror and joy at nights, before a new dream joins the ranks of his hauntings.
A blushing pink, a laid back silver and overwhelming orange…
He catches himself staring at Sakura, comparing her sailor uniform with the red dress she is wearing in his dream. He looks at his uncle's friend and concludes there is not much difference between the dream Kakashi and the real one. More of those fleeting glances ensue and he decides that the orange tracksuit suits his friend better than the gakuran.
And then, there is blood again. On his face, his hand, his fingers… there is blood and a gaping hole on that orange tracksuit and it takes great effort not to cringe and cry, knowing that even if it was a dream him, he still hurt the dream Naruto.
He tries to deny it, saying how he will never, ever dare to harm him… But the dreams are far too real and the hate the illusionary him is carrying cuts like a sword.
But not more than those raw feelings in those blue pools…
He distances himself from them, fearing he will once again dye the pink haired girl's face with tears and that bright orange red.
It takes quite a time before another dream comes, and this one makes him feel even worse; he is, yet again, taunting and hurting him and he cannot bear to witness it anymore.
He seeks help and it comes in a form of a man he knows from a dream.
Except, he is wearing a white doctors garb, not a metal protector that hides his forehead and cheeks, no green jacket and certainly no trees coming out of his hands. Somehow, he is relieved.
He tells the man about the dreams, and he even tells about seeing him in there.
Dr. Yamato is silent for a long time, before he opens his mouth and makes a guess about it.
Another life lived.
Reincarnation.
A past that haunts him.
Sasuke Uchiha isn't sure how to react to that. He isn't sure whether to believe that in one of the lives he lived, his brother was a kin-slayer, Kakashi, of all people, his teacher and Naruto… the person he hurt most. He isn't ready to make peace with that theory, but in the end, what other exists?
So he accepts the fact he almost killed his once upon a time, and present, best friend.
There is a crooked smile on his face when he meets with Naruto the next day, a Naruto who is much too happy to help him forget whatever is troubling him.
Except Sasuke can't forget, for if he could, he wouldn't even be having those dreams.
It makes him question the reasons why those memories even came to him? Normally, a person shouldn't be able to remember any of their past lives? Is it possible, and this is Dr. Yamato's theory, that because he has assembled the same people from that life around him?
He doesn't know for sure, but he accepts that fact too and tries to move on.
It is hard, especially whenever Naruto does some stupid thing and Sasuke, like always, is ready to dish out harsh critics. He finds himself frozen by the hurtful look in Naruto's eyes and unable to breathe, his fingers cramping and that annoying bird chirping sound haunting his ears.
But it only takes a carefree smile from him to make Sasuke abandon his fears, and the hazy memories flow away, again.
He still doesn't have all the facts; he knows he had the same family that Itachi, for one reason or another, killed. He knows he was a shinobi, and that Sakura and Naruto and Kakashi were ones too.
He knows he swore revenge on Itachi, and he knows he is supposed to kill Naruto because of it… But even the past him and the present him inched away from that thought.
The dreams keep coming, one after another, and many other faces, some he recognizes and some he doesn't appear before him. But those four are constant… And Naruto's is even more pronounced than others.
Like a beacon of hope, undying light, is what Sasuke sees him in those dreams… But looking at him hurts his chest too much and the other he wants to extinguish it.
Two dreams come in one night, jumbled together; he is tired and petrified, but Itachi is dying (by my hand, the voice says) and then he is saying how he loves him and how he will always be proud of him, whatever he does.
Sasuke barges up to his big brother the next day, hugs him for all he's worth and cries into his chest. Itachi doesn't ask questions, he never does, he simply allows his baby brother whatever he wishes and offers a gentle smile and a forehead tap (like in a dream).
Sasuke and Dr. Yamato think the end is near, and with light step Sasuke joins Naruto, who is massacring the karaoke machine and songs horribly.
Naruto's encouraging smile relaxes him. Somehow, it seems the other boy understand but won't ever pester him about it.
Naruto tells him that as long as Sasuke always returns by his side, he doesn't care what roads he takes. That sentence alone puts Sasuke's mind into overdrive and little by little, he starts noticing the way Naruto's changed.
Sasuke doesn't know what to think when he finds Naruto giving a sad smile to a kindergarten teacher at a school they never went to (He is one of the dobe's precious people, the ghost of the past taunts). On one day, when they were returning from a library, Naruto stops an old man (and somehow he knows the man is a bridge builder before he says it) on the street and starts a jovial conversation about the Naruto bridge across Arakawa.
He isn't sure whether to find it funny or freaky when he finds an unknown preteen (Konohamaru, his mind and the kid himself supply) in Naruto's house. The next time he visits, it's to a picture of three preteens.
When Naruto introduces him to Gaara, Sasuke is plenty suspicious… and jealous to some point. He doesn't realize why, but somehow he hates that there is a kind of an unbreakable connection between them. The voice screams about a family and a brother and he is a bit relived.
Then he catches Naruto's fond, sad and heartbreaking look whenever he mentions his parents; there is a bit of an uncertainty in his pose when he goes to greet them at the airport and the hug he gives them is the same one he shared with Itachi a while ago.
Sasuke is certain that Naruto is having the same dream ride he has and it makes him edgy. Because now Naruto knows who he is, and what he's done and Sasuke is just waiting for Naruto to abandon him.
But he doesn't, and his next dream tells him why.
"When I see you carrying that burden…" The Naruto lying next to him, probably in as much of a pain as he was, tells him "Somehow, I just hurt.." The blue gaze is centered upon the skies, but his ones are fixed on the damaged profile of his friend, his brother… "..so much, I just can't leave you alone.".
And he remembers a small, fragile figure of a blonde boy who was always alone, always in the dark, but still shone like a guiding light. A boy who was hurt far too much to be able to smile that brightly… A boy whose suffering made his own heart cringe and tear in pain… And he understood.
He finally understood why did the past him act the way he did, he finally got what the motivator behind those hurtful actions was… He finally, finally felt at ease because now he knew that Naruto wasn't going to leave him.
His Naruto, past and present, will never give up on him.
That was probably the reason he remembered what he did from his past life; Naruto made sure for them to be together again, he made sure to give them their happy future.
Sasuke wasn't ashamed to cry like a little baby that night, hiccupping and sniveling snots all over his bed, huddled into him.
And when he saw Naruto the next day, waiting for him in front of the theater, with that beautiful smile plastered all over his face, offering his right palm for the taking, Sasuke understood everything.
"You're never leaving me alone, huh, usuratonkachi?"
"You better believe it teme!"