Surrender
Song: 21 Guns by Green Day
(A/N: Plugging away at that setlist for chapters...BTW, you guys are song GENIES!)
Max
I forced myself to stare into the mirror. My eyes were bloodshot, and my face was tired-looking and pale. My hair was knarled and frizzy. I gripped the side of the sink, nausea washing a wave over me. I was just too tired to wake this time. Too tired to fake it, to keep on living this way. Fighting wasn't worth it anymore. I ran a hand through my dingy streaks and undressed. I let the hot streams of steamy water cascade above my troubles. When I stepped out, I dried off and blow-dried my hair. And that's when he arrived. The door to my apartment clicked and shut. My defense tightened until I heard his voice.
"Max….." he trailed off. I winced. Every time he came around, the stitches on my heart ripped open again. I let my wings wriggle from the identical slits on the back of my shirt. They drooped onto the bed, spilling numerous feathers laying in perfect symmetry onto the bed attached to my light bird-bones. I looked into his all-too-amazing jet eyes. The little specks of gold that only I seemed to see sparkled.
"I'm sorry." He whispered, stroking the line of my jaw. I shivered involuntarily, feeling the affection towards him course throughout my veins. His lips were so perfect… I found myself in them. All the fighting and venomous words fell from my mind. Instead, clear peace sparked and made me want to just fall into him and never leave. All those songs I used to hear on the radio…..about 'Without this person I could die' and stuff, I'd never understood until now. It wasn't that I could die…..but that I knew I would. I wrapped my wings around his and kissed him harder. It wasn't tough or even rough, but smooth and sweet and…faultless and flawless and everything I ever wanted. The world faded. All the wars I could've stopped, the help I could've done; everything that I ever felt guilty about was clear-cut down into dust scattered on the wind. All the anger that I'd stored and the resentment that often clouded my vision…..gone. I broke apart and pushed myself to the balcony, forty stories up. I spun around. Fang's clothing was dark. His black semi-skinny jeans were ripped in several places. His hoodie was pulled over his face. A dark angel…how could he ever love me? I had a weakness for him; my fatal flaw, you could say. Unspoken words traversed between us, and we lifted into the air. Each of our arms encircled the other, holding them in a consoling, soothing embrace. I was awake, alive, and alert. Aware that I couldn't ever leave him again. I might as well give up. A wall of our past climbed between us in my mind. My senses augmented. But as the pain welled up in my heart, I crumbled. I can't keep struggling with this addiction. It was something that I couldn't ever assign or allot to anyone else. I've lost my sanity, my life, and my family for this love. There's nothing left but me and him. Just us, alone; facing the world with just each other. Elated passion spilled over. I would willingly spend the rest of my life with this person. My knives and weapons of the ancient history fell to the ground; useless. I broke our kiss and just held him close. I rested my head on his chest; he was so much taller than I now. The tears threatened to run over my cheeks, and they did. In that moment, I did something that I swore I'd never do.
I surrendered.