God, I was so inconsiderate with the last chapter. It was such poor quality that I was embarrassed that it came out of me. So I will try my best to make this a much better quality chapter, especially since you finally get to see Shahin's reaction to being found out. Hope you enjoy!

Oh. And it was brought to my attention about the gender of Shahin's name. Yes, it is just a guy name. Not a he/she name that can go either way, and I purposely chose Shahin's name to be that way so I did not make a mistake in choosing names. Besides, how would Shahin hide her gender if she had a woman's name? That just doesn't make sense.

Chapter 17: Confessions

There was no thought in my head. For once, I didn't have control of myself. I was vaguely aware of curling up into a ball and clutching my head and a voice saying something, but nothing else. It took all of my will to not scream, and even then I wasn't sure if I succeeded. Every single time I'd felt a little fear or trepidation when someone said something that could have been linked to my gender, came back.

And it came back with a vengeance.

There were so many thoughts running through my head that it could only be defined as a roar in sound. I couldn't sort through. It was too much. Too much too soon.

I know you're a woman. I know you're a woman. I know you're a woman.

How could five simple words ruin everything? My lifetime of control was gone. My confidence that I could live out my life in relative peace was gone. My confidence in hiding my secrets was gone. Everything. Was. Gone.

He knows. How could he know? What will he do? He knows. How will I keep masquerading? He KNOWS. What should I do? Am I able to do anything? Should I do anything? HE KNOWS.

WHO KNOWS?

I didn't know. Who knew my secret? My mind was in too much turmoil to bother giving me an answer and my emotions weren't helping at all. All I could comprehend was that someone knew the secret that would end my life and that I was scared. So, so scared.

There was a loud drum close to my ears and it took me a second to realize that it was a heartbeat. I figured it was mine and tried to pull myself out of the storm that was wreaking so much havoc on my sanity. I couldn't recall anything. The mind-numbing fear was the only thing that registered with me.

Until I realized someone had their arms around me.

I lost it. I could only think that those strong arms wanted only thing from a woman and I wouldn't give the man anything with dying first. Snarling, I spun out of the arms that were holding me and on to my feet, unsheathing my hidden blade and pulling one of my many knives and I had only a second to wonder why I was armed so well before I saw the man move towards me. I couldn't really see the man: my vision swam too much and made everything blurry. It was like I was seeing through water. My body flowed into a fighting stance and I lashed out at the white blur that was the man. I heard a defiant woman's war cry and a small corner of my rioting brain realized that the sound had come from me.

I didn't think on how I was able to fight so well and move with so much speed: I only thought on how to kill the man who had once held me. The White Man deflected my attack with something on his arm and raised his hand to latch on to my wrist, but I had already spun away from him. My mind was able to realize that the White Man was much slower than me: that I would be able to slip past his guard easily. When I came up behind the slowly half turning man I slashed my hidden blade forward. Only to be met with armor. Snarling, I danced back before coming forward to meet the man. This time he tried his best to block my attacks with his own blade and whatever was on his arm and trying to keep up with my obviously superior speed. It was while I was moving for a second time that the air suddenly turned golden and it was almost impossible to move.

I gave up on moving my arms after a moment and opened my wings up. I flexed that muscle and lashed out with both of my large wings to try and knock the White Man back and stop whatever this golden air was, but the White Man's own pair of wings and blocked my heavy gold wings. I blinked and gasped in shock, before trying to move at all, but now my wings were immobilized like my arms and body.

Fear consumed me when I realized I was at the man's mercy and I could stop the enraged scream that escaped me. The man's voice fell against deaf ears as I struggled with all my will to move even an inch. It was impossible. My cheek suddenly stung and I spat vile curses that tasted bitter at the White Man for slapping me. He would pay for that. He would pay dearly for that and what he was going to do to me. The man kept trying to talk with me, he almost sounded panicky and worried, but I figured that was due to me having the ability to kill him. I was just about to start cursing again when the White Man darted forward.

And something firm pressed against my lips. My body tensed, fully ready to plunge my blades into my would-be rapist's body, until something clicked in my head. There was a scar on those lips pressing against mine. Something that was so familiar. And the scent that came to my nose, the one that smelled like musk and desert heat and feathers and was so pleasing to my nose, was also familiar. Familiar enough that I stopped fighting the golden air for a moment.

A moment was all that was needed for my memories and sanity to come back to me. I blinked my wide golden eyes and looked at the amber eyes as the pressure left my lips. "Al-Altair?" I whispered, sounding so incredibly lost, even to my own ears. The golden air disappeared and my arms fell limp to my sides, knife sliding from loose fingers, and my wings slowly folded against my back.

"Shh… It's okay Shahin. It's okay," he murmured as he pulled me into a tight hug. I blinked in surprise, trying to realize what had happened in those past few minutes. My arms unconsciously came up and wrapped firmly around Altair's trim waist and my forehead came to rest on his shoulder. Somehow, Altair ended up witting with me cradled in his lap with me clutching his neck now. He continued to saying nonsense in hisdeep comforting voice.

Time was lost on me until I was finally able to pull back enough and ask, "Did I…really…?"

Altair's hand came up and stroked my back. "It's alright," was his only answer.

I shook my head vigorously, and pulled back farther until I could meet his amber eyes with my golden ones. "No its not!" I snapped, half-angry half-scared. "I could've killed you, Altair! If it weren't for your armor I would have!"

Altair looked away and muttered, "Well, I would've deserved it. I did look under your robes and shirts."

I froze, all thoughts in my head stopping as I processed what he'd said. My eyes closed half way, so Altair wasn't able to read anything from them, though he immediately looked warywhen he noticed my change in mood. "You looked under my shirts," I repeated quietly, and I waited until Altair nodded hesitantly before continuing. "You saw my chest." Another nod, but with a blush and averted eyes this time. "And you did this while I was unconscious?" He nodded again, looking shameful.

He opened his mouth, "Shahin. I can explain—"

He stopped when I laid a finger on his lips and pulled back silently. Altair's amber eyes watched my veiled expression with questioning in them. I gave no warning before I pulled back my hand and slapped him.

He gaped at finding his cheek stinging and his head suddenly turned to the side. He blinked at me in shock, only to find me glaring at him and quivering in fury. "I swear to every single god there is that if you do something like that again I will not hesitate to castrate you," I growled menacingly. Altair paled in fear, knowing I would, only to look confused when I suddenly looked fearful.

"What's wrong, Shahin?" he asked, latching on to my arm to stop me from pulling back any farther.

I swallowed, or tried to, before whispering, "You're going to turn me into Al Mualim, aren't you?" The fear had returned at the thought of what I would do in the future, only to realize I didn't have a future.

I was confused when Altair openly blanched and looked at me in surprise. "Turn you in?" he repeated before shaking his head. "Friends don't do that to each other, Shahin." Though Malik did so, he thought bitterly. "I won't turn you in. Your secret, or secrets, are safe with me."

I narrowed my eyes at him in suspicion. "What's in it for you?" I demanded.

He cocked his head at me in confusion. "What?"

I blew a raspberry, giving his shoulders a small shake, "What do you want in exchange for keeping my gender a secret?"

He frowned, looking at me as if I'd gone crazy. "What could I possibly want from you?"

I'm sure my face read 'What are you stupid?' as I replied. "Do I have to spell it out for you?" His confused expression said I did and I sighed, looking up at the night sky. My wings ruffling uneasily betrayed my embarrassment. "Think, Altair. I am a woman," I stopped for a moment to take a calming breath at admitting my lifelong secret before continuing. "And you are the only man in existence who knows that. What else would a man want?"

He looked confused for a second before understanding lit his face and his cheeks turned red as he blushed. "I wouldn't do that to you!" he snapped indignantly. His wings fluffed up in irritation.

I raised an eyebrow at him and asked, "So the thought never crossed your mind?"

He shook his head vehemently and hotly responded. "No! Not until you brought it up!"

I looked over his face with critical eyes before I finally began to believe him. "You really aren't going to turn me in, are you?"

"No," he answered simply, letting his infamous temper go, his feathers smoothing down.

I looked him over once more before my shoulders drooped in relief and I hugged his neck in gratitude. "Thank you. Thank you so much."

He chuckled and easily accepted the hug. "You really are a woman with your mood swings. One moment you're having a panic attack, the next you're slapping me for looking under your clothes, then you're accusing me of wanting to blackmail you, and now you're hugging me to thank me. Really, choose an emotion and stick with it please. It will confuse me less."

I pulled back, a rare smile gracing my face and I smacked him lightly on the head before pulling myself out of his lap. To avoid blushing I forced my thoughts away from how close we had been for the past who knows how long and on to something much more satisfying. I smiled evilly. "Then, how about revenge?" I asked.

Altair looked a little scared before looking at the ground in embarrassment. "I apologized though. And you slapped me."

I snorted and stretched my wings and body out. I knew that the fact that Altair knew my secret had sunk in at a record time and that now the fact that I was a woman would be something we would take in stride. That was a very pleasing thought. "Not you, idiot," I corrected and he looked at me. I answered his unspoken question. "The bandits."

Understanding dawned on his rugged face. "They do have our horses and equipment," he mused.

I grinned and continued his line of thought, "And we aren't expected back at Masyaf for another day or two."

He grinned back and fanned out his wings. "Not to mention they need to be taught that Assassins shouldn't be trifled with."

I raised my wings and bent my knees in preparation to take off into the air. "Let's go hunting," I said, before I leapt into the air, Altair not too far behind.

Woo! That sounds like a much better quality chapter and Shahin had her freak out and got to slap Altair. I honestly didn't expect Shahin to lose her mind but it came out so its there now. I hope you like this chapter much better than the last one.

P.S. I'am pleased to announce that I have just finished the third chapter of my Transformers fanfic and I wanted to say a special thank you to Alice of the Forest, Skyla, and my own little bro for reading my chapters so far and critiquing my work. I really appreciate it you guys and I can't write in words how thankful I am for you guys taking the time to help me!

REVIEWS PLEASE! I can't improve my story unless you tell me how I'm doing and I've had over five thousand people have at least looked at my story! Yay btw for so many views! But everyone should be reviewing. I'm writing this story for you guys! Help me improve it!