Your Hands in Mine P4
Chuck came into consciousness on their first full day in Bermuda slowly. He stretched and felt the beautiful linens wrapped around his legs, he could tell the room was bright without even opening his eyes, he could smell the remnants of their bubble bath on his skin and then suddenly he could hear the soft muffled sound of crying.
"Sarah?" his head shot up from the fluffy pillow and turned towards his wife.
"Hey," she tried to cover with a quick smile, but it was obvious she was crying.
"What's the matter?" he asked cautiously.
"I just remembered Thailand, not just the funny giant blonde-she-male parts, but all of it: how terrified I was, how out of control, how close I came to failing," she tried to hold back the torrent of emotion she was feeling.
Chuck could see her trying to restrain herself, her shoulders quivering. He knew she wanted to be strong, it was her nature, but he hated to see her suffer so he slid over, found the opening in the hotel robe she had put back on and pulled her body close, opening her from the cocoon she had put herself in so he could hold her.
As soon as she let him hold her the floodgates opened and she sobbed against his bare shoulder. Chuck shut his eyes tight, hoping to give her some privacy and comfort at the same time. When she seemed to calm a little he pulled back, tears of his own on his cheeks.
"Do you remember what you said when you found me?" he wiped at her messy face as she nodded.
"That I was nothing but a spy without you and I wanted to marry you," her voice cracked on marry and the tears started again.
"I was so glad to see you, to know it was really you and not my stupid mind playing tricks on me," he looked in her watery blue eyes, "but you need to know this Sarah Walker, you were always more than a spy, with or without me. I may have helped you deal with your non-spy self better, I may have allowed you to explore being a normal girl, but you always were. Just look at what you did for Molly," he smiled.
"You make me feel so much," she accused with a half smile.
"I used to be a lot more closed off too, having both your parents walk away is hard, even after you understand why. You help me feel more too, express more."
"We were both kind of broken," Sarah shrugged one shoulder.
Chuck nodded and kissed her tear-stained face all over until she laughed.
"Not all your recovered memories are going to be funny or sexy, some of them are going to be painful, literally and figuratively," he stroked her delicate cheek which he had seen bloody and bruised more often than he would like.
"I know," she inhaled deeply and blew out a calming breath.
Chuck was rubbing circles on her back through the robe and decided it would be much more soothing to do the same to her bare back, so he peeled the robe off her body as he reclined back against the pillows, pulling her on top of him and finding a cool sheet to cover them.
"Go back to sleep," he murmured against her ear.
***555***
When Chuck woke the second time Sarah was sitting on top of him, fully dressed. Jeans and a light weight blue sweater, her hair in a ponytail and the barest trace of make-up on.
"You are way over-dressed for bed," he turned his face into the pillow.
"And you are way too lazy," she pinched his bare side.
"Ow! Vacation, remember?" he turned his face the other way into the pillow.
"Paradise, remember? Let's go see it."
"Can't be more beautiful than you in this bed," he said with his eyes still shut and a dreamy look on his face.
"There is coffee and breakfast and I unpacked," Sarah started listing.
"How long have you been up?"
"Couple hours."
"What time is it?" he squinted his eyes open again.
"Almost noon, and it is sunny and beautiful out. Take me to the beach?"
Chuck leaned up on his elbows and Sarah ran her hands along his chest before settling them on his face and pulling him up further for a kiss.
"We can actually see the beach from here," Chuck pointed out as he looked over Sarah's shoulder to the ocean beyond.
"But I'm a toes in the sand kind of girl," she said and Chuck's eyes got big.
"I've told you that before?"
"Yes, Morgan and I were working on a 'toes in the sand' dream home search. He gave it an acronym," Chuck smiled as Sarah worked it out.
"Nice," she frowned.
"He meant well, anyway that was when you told me about your real dream home.'
"Ah," Sarah nodded the white house with the red door making more sense now.
"Yeah," Chuck closed his mouth into a grim line.
They hadn't talked about the little white house yet and Chuck was not ready to do so now, so he sat up further, looping his arms around Sarah's waist and pulled her in for another kiss.
"Get dressed," she said with weakening resolve as his hands found a tiny patch of skin where her sweater had ridden up.
"I'm pretty sure I could get you undressed faster," he let his hand skitter around to the button of her jeans.
"I have no doubt and while you present a very compelling argument for remaining in this really nice bed the reality is if we were just going to stay in bed we could have vacationed in Barstow," Sarah laughed.
Chuck was so happy to hear her laugh after hearing her cry earlier.
"OK, OK. I will get up, but that sand better feel amazing between my toes," he pointed a long finger at her and then poked her nose.
***555***
They left their shoes and long sleeve layers on one of the yellow beach chairs, the sun was warm enough for bare arms and bare feet. They moved in and out of the ocean's path, from warm pink sand to cool wet sand with the occasional gentle wave tickling their toes.
Elbow Beach was so named for its spot on the crook of the island, so they abandoned their belongings and followed the winding shore as far as they could go before a rock face forced them to stop. Chuck hopped up on a good sized flat rock and reached down to help Sarah.
They laid back, side by side, the warmth from the rock transferred to their backs, their hands behind their heads and watched as the gulls flew overhead.
"They are very pretty," Sarah noted.
"Longtails, named for their, well, long tail," Chuck grinned.
"Insightful, Mr. Bartowski."
"They live in the rocks, much less annoying than your standard seagull," he continued.
"Someone did some Googling," Sarah teased.
"And that," he listened intently, "is a Kiskadee. They are yellowish green, pretty."
Sarah looked about at the rocks and trees behind them.
"There," she pointed and they saw the pretty bird perched and scouting for something.
"Nice," Chuck smiled.
"This is nice," Sarah took one hand from behind her head and reached over to trail her fingers along Chuck's temple.
"We seem drawn to the ocean," Chuck ventured.
"Nothing makes you feel more vulnerable," she sat up to take in the object of her thoughts.
"It is daunting," he joined her.
"I like the way it makes me feel insignificant," Sarah admitted.
"I think I understand that, after the last few years, it is nice to have nature put you in your place when you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders."
"I don't want you to feel that way, Chuck. If the Intersect is going to put you in danger and cause you stress and pain… wait, are you having problems with this one?" Sarah remembered the tooth all of a sudden.
"I haven't flashed much, but no it hasn't hurt or caused any nightmares," he promised her.
"Good," she kissed his temple as he sat up to join her, wrapping his arm around hers and inching his hips closer.
"We have 2 weeks to talk about work and the Intersect, right now, let's just enjoy this amazing view," he said, but his eyes weren't on the water in front of them, but rather on his wife.
"View's that way," she smiled as she took his chin in her hand and shifted it.
"Oh," he said with a grin, "that's pretty too."
"I'm going in," Sarah declared as she pulled her tee shirt off to reveal a bikini top.
"The ocean? Sarah, it's February," he grimaced.
"It's beautiful out and the water isn't that cold," she rationed as she shimmied out of her jeans.
"I'll keep the rock warm for you," he grinned.
As Sarah went to pull off her jeans she stopped.
"Did we have to strip outside for a mission once?" she asked.
"Yes, that wasn't actually very long ago. We were tracking a computer virus and the man that developed it belonged to a cult that had an aversion to clothing," Chuck explained.
"That must have been hard for you," Sarah smiled softly and Chuck was happy that she seemed to know him, really know him and his quirks.
"It was made worse by the fact that our back up was Gertrude Verbanski, that woman is hyper-critical about everything," Chuck raised his eyebrows.
"Well there is nothing to criticize," Sarah reached out and ran a hand along his thigh.
"She had a little fun with me," Chuck shrugged.
"Sure you don't want to join me?" Sarah cocked her head towards the water.
"You have fun, " he grinned.
"Suit yourself," she sighed and hopped off the rock.
Chuck watched her move towards the water, her hips swaying in the tiny blue bathing suit. She reached up and pulled the hair tie from her hair, it was still too short for his liking, but longer than it had been as it fell around her shoulders. She didn't hesitate when she reached the water, walking up to her mid thighs before diving under and emerging a few feet further out.
He watched as she moved gracefully through the waves, popping up like a mermaid or a selkie, her hair darker wet but still glinting in the sun.
Sarah swam a bit before flipping on to her back, letting the sun warm her face and stomach as she floated. She felt free and light and happy. It felt good after the shock of the emotion that accompanied her memories of Thailand. She had no idea what triggered the memories, especially after such a wonderful evening with Chuck the night before, but she woke up and they were there sitting on her, crushing her.
Chuck was birdwatching and when he looked back Sarah was closer to shore, only about knee deep in the water. She caught his eye and waved, he waved back and then she beckoned him to join her, pointing into the water. Intrigued he hopped up and jogged to the edge.
"Fish," she explained.
"Cold," he replied.
"Wimp," she countered.
He sighed and bent down to roll up his jeans. Sarah chuckled at the end result that looked an awful lot like Huck Finn. The water wasn't as cold as Chuck feared and as he approached he could see the colors swirling around Sarah's legs, tons of tiny tropical fish.
"You found Nemo," he smirked.
"And a lot of his friends."
Chuck reached out and took Sarah's hands in his own and they watched the fish swim around their legs until their toes were pruned. They returned to their rock, still sun-warmed and stretched out so Sarah could dry off, Chuck rolled to his side and traced random patterns on her stomach as she ran her fingers through his hair.
"Want to eat in the restaurant tonight?" Sarah asked lazily.
"Sure," he looked up towards her face.
"We haven't actually had a date since the beach," Sarah pointed out.
Chuck was both happy and sad that "the beach" was a point of reference, especially when they were currently on a beach.
"True," he agreed.
"I feel like getting dressed up."
"Really, because I like what you have on now," he replaced his fingers on her stomach with his lips.
"You'll see me in this plenty. Less than this too," she promised.
"Sarah, I have seen you in nothing, in a wedding dress, in a belly dancer's outfit and a nurse's uniform. I have seen you in haute couture and your Weinerlicious outfit and you are always the most beautiful person in any room, always," Chuck said honestly.
Sarah looked at him lovingly, "A nurse's uniform?"
"Mission."
"Oh good," she laughed.
***555***
"Dinner's at 8:00 and I made an appointment to get my nails done at 4:00," Sarah announced as she joined Chuck on the patio.
They had stopped at the beach club and grabbed sandwiches and cocktails for lunch and he had arranged them on the table under the umbrella.
"Great," he smiled up at her.
Sarah's hair was curly and beachy from her swim, the little make up she had put on long gone and the tiniest tinge of pink stretched across her nose and cheeks.
"I'm glad we did this," he said as he reached out and tucked her hair behind her ear.
"Me too," she nodded.
"I love Morgan and my sister, but we need this time alone, just to be…"
"…normal?"
"Not sure normal is achievable for us, but even just to be us, whatever that is," Chuck shrugged.
"Us is pretty good, right?" Sarah asked, certain she was right.
"Us is very good," Chuck kissed her.
TBC…