Author's Note: I'm very very sorry for the late update. Many things happen recently and I got distracted hahaha (okay I know it's not a good excuse) so please forgive me...

I use some words in Korean, so I listed the meaning below. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong;

Aboeji/Appa = Father
Ommoni/Omma = Mother
Haraboeji = Grandfather
Halmoni = Grandmother
Samchun/Ahjusshi = Uncle
Imo/Ahjumma = Aunty

Chapter 7; Daddy's Boy

A day after he was born, Ga Eul's parents came to visit their grandson. They were so happy to meet him and I also noticed that they started to treat me nicely. Her father said that I already pass the test. If I can survive during Ga Eul's pregnancy period then they can trust me to take care of their daughter.

Surprisingly my parents also came to visit us. One thing I've learn after Yul Jin birth is; you can never denied your own blood. No matter how bad my father was, no matter how mad I am at him, I could never hate him and I believed that deep inside his cold heart, he always love me and my brother and now maybe Yul Jin too.

"He looks just like my Yi Jeong." My mother said proudly at everyone in the room while holding Yul Jin.

"No, he looks just like my Ga Eul." Ga Eul's mother immediately interrupted and walked closer to my mother and Yul Jin. "See his doe-like-eyes and thin lips are just like my Ga Eul." Ga Eul's mother also stated it proudly while pointing at Yul Jin's face.

"Although he may have his mother's eye shape, but if you look carefully, those black coloured eyes definitely from my Yi Jeong. When he smiles, you can see the dimple just like my Yi Jeong. His nose obviously you know from whom and the shape of his face especially this long chin is no doubt inherited from the So." My mother said while pinching his chin.

Oh my, I'm sensing that this argument will last forever if no one interrupted them and for God sake, he's only one day old and how can they tell whose look that he took from?

"And the conclusion is he looks just like his father and mother." Thanks aboeji. My father finally interfered with a stern voice. He managed to stop the argument and made those grandmothers quiet for a while. Only for a while because five minutes later, they started to argue again about the planning for his future.

"Yi Jeong-ah, can I see you alone now." My father said with a serious face and made me gulped nervously. I realised that Ga Eul's face changed into fear and worried about what my father want to say to me. "Don't worry Ga Eul-yang, I just want to ask something from my son." I guessed maybe not a serious matter because he was smiling at Ga Eul to ease her worries.

I followed him until he stopped at the garden of the hospital and sat at the bench under a maple tree.

"I guess I won't ever know about him if I waited for you to tell me directly." He started the conversation after a long silent.

"How did you know?"

He chuckled leisurely after hearing my question. "You showed her to the world with a big lump on her belly during Jun Pyo's wedding party, you openly brought her to the shopping malls for shopping and dine at the most exclusive restaurants in town. Ah, not to mention the increase of your spending for the past eight months."

I silently listen at his words. When he sensed that I didn't want to reply, he continued; "I maybe look like I don't care at all. Truth is I don't care how you want to manage your personal life and spending but when it comes to something big like this, your mother and I actually feel sad that we didn't hear the news from your mouth. Do you hate us so much until you want to hide our own grandson from us?" I can sense angriness in his voice.

"I knew you will know. Although I've (with the help from F3) already controlled all the media from spraying bad stories about my personal life, I knew you have the powers to dig into my secret."

"Of course, but still we wanted to hear it from you. We heard about his birth this dawn and your mother wanted to go to the hospital straight away but I asked her to wait until morning. Actually she wanted to see you earlier to ask about Ga Eul-yang's pregnancy but I forbid her to mess with your life."

"She is not a mess!" My father just ignored me and continued;

"So she waited and waited for you to come to her but you never show up. That's why when she begged me to see her grandson, I don't have a heart to say no. I know you were shock to see us. I just want to say sorry to you because we show up like this and sorry if you don't welcome our sudden emergence."

"You done nothing wrong so no need for you to say sorry and I'm glad that you came."

"I know it is my fault to turn you into me but I hope you can be a good son to your mother. I think it is enough for just me to hurt her. Your brother totally shut off his life from us so she only has you Yi Jeong."

"If you know it then why you kept on hurting her?" I felt angry when I thought about my father infidelity with many women.

"I'm irreversible son." He looks sad and stayed silent for a while. "I've already lost the woman that made we wanted to live the right way. Once your heart is saturated with hatred, no amount of guilt will change you. That's why I wish my life would pass by quickly." He just kept staring at nothing for a while, maybe reminiscence about his past and suddenly he snapped out and immediately looked back at me. "And you, don't repeat my mistake and don't take too long okay."

"What do you mean, what 'don't take too long'?"

He just smirked at me and patted my shoulder before standing up and walked away. I sat there for a while and replaying back the advised that he gave me. What did he mean by that? Don't take too long for what? Why can't he tell me straight away? Argggh, my head hurt every time I tried to find the answer but at least I knew my father still cared about me.

Father huh? I can't believe I am a father now. I have someone who carried half of my gene, someone who inherited my family name, someone who bonded with me forever, someone that will called me 'appa', someone that permanently connected me to Ga Eul. His name is So Yul Jin, the apple of my eyes.

He grew up so quickly and Ga Eul never left me to involve with his development. She taught me how to bath him, how to wash his poop (although that was the job that I intended to escape), how to change his diapers (I'm so proud when I can change his diapers less than fifty seconds but the time became longer and longer when he started to crawl), how to put his cloths on, what temperature that suitable for his milk, the importance of burping him after feeding and how to tucked him to bed while singing lullaby songs.

The first time when I tried to burp him, maybe I patted his back too hard that caused him to thrown back his milk at my shoulder. There also times when he spraying his pee on me while I'm bathing him. Luckily I have lot of shirts so I just throw away the smelly shirts but the smell on my body stick for a few days. But for some odd reason I didn't mind at all when he dirtied me with his smelly fluids.

He likes me so much and clinging on me was his favourite habits. He always smiled every time he saw me. Every morning he would woke up early because he wanted me to take him for a short stroll around our garden before I went to work. Every time when I came home, I will straight away looking for him and after he started to getting around on his own, he will waited for me at the front door to welcome me home with his smiling face. All the tiredness I felt the whole day at work was simply washed away by his giggle and by Ga Eul's simple greeting; "Welcome home sunbae".

Sometimes Ga Eul would get jealous because she thought Yul Jin loves me more than her. She said I shouldn't spoil him too much. She even became more jealous when the first word that came from his mouth was 'appa' when he was just four months old.

"It's not fair."

"Why? I'm part of his life too."

"Well he always by my side almost the whole day and I trained him to call 'omma' in each second yet 'appa' is still becomes his first word." She pouted her lips at me.

"I'm sure his second word will be 'omma'."

"He better be or I won't feed him when he cries."

Witnessing his first time of everything had been our greatest pleasure. Hearing him said 'appa' for the first time almost brought tears to my eyes. My hopeless country bumpkin already crying although she was not satisfied with that word. I can tell that he was a smart boy. He was a fast learner and when he reached one-year-old, he can have simple conversations with us.

The first time when he tried to take his first step, Ga Eul and I waited in the most intense emotion. Bead of sweat accumulated at our forehead and our heart thumping so wildly. It was like watching my favourite football team tried to score a goal in a sudden death match. I waited at his back; ready to catch him if he fall and Ga Eul was in front of him; encouraging him to walk towards her. As soon as he lifted his foot and managed to propel without falling, we cheered loudly and he just giggling because he thought that we were in the middle of playing a game.

When I said that he really like to cling on me, I really meant it. Every night he only wanted me to tuck him to bed. I think he adored my voice so much. There was a time when I had to go to Italy for three days to attend an important conference and art exhibition. It was the first time I'm away from Yul Jin. The first day when I called home I heard him crying on the phone. Ga Eul said that he didn't want to sleep and kept calling his 'appa'. My heart painfully constricted when I heard him crying for me.

"Ga Eul-yang, please put the phone on a loud speaker."

"Okay sunbae, it's already on."

"Yul Jin-ah." I softly cooed his name and I heard his cry was suddenly stop but the hiccup can still be heard.

"He recognises your voice sunbae and he's searching for you."

"Yul Jin-ah, do you miss me? I miss you and omma so much you know." I closed my eyes to prevent the tears from burst out. "You can't sleep without that song do you? Appa will sing to you Yul Jin-ah."

Hush little Yuljin don't you cry
Appa's going to buy you your favourite pie
If you are done eating
Appa's going to buy you a golden ring
If that golden ring don't shine
Hush little Yuljin don't you mind
Appa's going to love you till the end of time
I'm always going to love you till the end of time

It was originally called 'Hush Little Baby' but I changed the lyric to sooth him and I repeated that song over and over again until Ga Eul stopped me.

"He's asleep now sunbae."

She was waiting for my answer but I kept silent while hearing her slow breathing. Somehow listening to her breathing was like a music in my ear that entertained my lonely heart.

"Are you crying sunbae?" I snapped out at her question and immediately wiped away a few stubborn tears that shed from my eyes.

"No! Of course not. Why are you asking me that question? I'm not a little boy anymore. It's not like I can easily cried like a baby who miss his parents. I'm...I'm a grown up man, I can handle myself to live alone in the foreign land. And for your information, I just took the most delicious risotto ai quattro sapori for lunch and I can see the Colosseum and the ruins of Imperial Rome directly from my room window. I'm still thinking what to take for dinner and although I'm alone I still need to eat right. Or maybe I don't need to think and just eat whatever food they serve during the exhibition tonight. And then I'll just go to sleep because last night I can't sleep. Did I mention to you that I reach this hotel at 1 a.m. last night, or morning… whatever, after a long flight from Korea but still I can't sleep, maybe I'm not use to a new bed like you and…"

"Sunbae."

"Hmm?"

"We miss you too, I miss you a lot." A small smile appeared at my lips when I heard her confession but I chose to keep silent. "So please eat well, doesn't matter risotto whatever that I never heard, please sleep well in the room that you can see the great monuments from your window and enjoyed the art exhibition that I know you love to go. Then just a blink of eyes you will not realise that the three days were already gone and you can come back to us, we always here to welcome you back."

"It would be much better if you are here with me." I murmured slowly.

"What did you said sunbae? I can't hear you."

"I said, I'll follow your advised and wait patiently for the three days to be over. Go to sleep now Ga Eul-yang, I guess now is 10 p.m. there and I'm sure you're sleepy already."

"Bye sunbae, I love you." And she hung up the phone. The phone was still close to my ear and there was no sound came out from it but the last conversation kept replaying over and over again like a broken record. How easy she said it. Every day, not a single day that she missed to say that she loves me and every day, not a single day that her confession left me speechless and make me blushed profusely.

Of course that was not the only time that I had to go overseas for few days. And every time I'm away, I got the same symptoms of eremophobia. I hate to be alone but being alone although only for a few days made me realised something very important. Being away awakened the inner feeling of my heart and little by little it surfed up and showed itself. I can't believe it took me this long to finally see it.

Yul Jin is almost two-year-old and it means that I live with Ga Eul for three years now. But that feeling hide from me long before that. When I think more, I concluded that it was first invaded my heart from the first time I met her, the day she scolded me at my workshop.

How dumbass I am. To finally realise that the whole eight years I've been in love with her. I was once mistaken the definition of love with Eun Jae and maybe because of it I became this stupid. That time I thought I'm in love with her but I never change my lifestyle. Women were still clinging on me and I can't stop the infidelity.

But for the past eight years, I unconsciously loyal to only one woman, Chu Ga Eul to be exact. Yes for the first few years while I befriended her when we were still teenagers, I did flirting around but the fling never ends up on my bed. Four years in Sweden, I solely focus my mind to heal my hand and become a better potter, never think to flirt around with the blue eyed girls. Three years after I came back from Sweden, she is the only one that warmth up my body, the only woman I saw before I went to sleep and the only one who greeted me when I woke up.

Was there any other explanation for my loyalty? Why every time I'm away from her I will miss her like crazy? How can that little boy named Yul Jin light up my life so easy? Now I know what my father meant when he advise me not to take too long. I should listen to him, after all he was more experienced and he knew what it feel to loose someone that very important to you.

The 'love' had been dormant for so long and now I want it to wake up for good. I know I'm a little bit late but it's better late than never. But I didn't know how to say it to her. Every time when she said she loves me, I wanted to say I love her too but it was hard. I can say 'I love you' to Yul Jin so easily but I was so shy to say it to her. In the end I only whispered those words while she was sleeping, and after she hung up the phone, and sometimes I secretly stared at her and said 'I love you' loudly while holding Yul Jin. That 'love' was meant for her but of course she thought that I said it to Yul Jin.

How pathetic I am; a fool plus jerk plus dense plus shy (?) plus any bad words that anyone wanted to throw at me, I openly accepted because I know I deserved it. So now, all I have to do is built up my courage to confess to her and I hope I can do it soon. I hope…