Chapter 16; In The House With Him

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I never knew that picking a house would be so difficult. Not because the houses were bad, but because it were way too big and expensive to me. After meeting my parents, Yi Jeong-sunbae and I started to look for a house to live because he said that my apartment was not suitable to raise a child in it. I also didn't like his mansion because it was too big and he seldom spent his time in that place, but the main reason was I don't want to get involved with his weird family. He said that his mother already recovered from her mental breakdown but his father was still the same amorous womaniser.

I don't like all the house that he selected. In fact I don't understand why he needed to choose super-duper huge houses only for the three of us to live in. I bet my unborn child can get lost in those houses when he/she started to learn to walk. We kept arguing about the house and I found my new strength to stubbornly oppose his decisions.

It seemed impossible for us to reach an agreement until I lay my eyes on that one particular house that I saw after one of our catastrophic meeting with the property agent. He seemed to like the house too but the problem was that the house was not for sell and sunbae's rudeness made me and the owner became mad at him.

A couple of week later, sunbae said that he had a surprised for me. He even blindfolded me throughout our trip until we reached the said surprised place. When he finally loosens the blindfold, I saw my dream house in front of my very own eyes.

"This is our house now." He said while beaming widely at me.

"Ours?" I asked him again for confirmation.

"Yes!" He said while nodded enthusiastically.

I don't know how he got it but there was no word to describe how happy I am when I went inside our house. I'm sure it had more reasonable price than the other houses that he chose before. I can even imagining myself living happily with Yi Jeong-sunbae in this house.

We held a small gathering with our friends as a celebration of our new house. Sunbae surprisingly eager to help me in the kitchen, though I preferred to cook the foods all by myself because actually, he just a nuisance that delayed me in preparing the foods.

As expected, Jan Di still holds a grudge against Yi Jeong-sunbae, All the time she always find an excused to fight with him. I appreciated what she trying to do because I knew that she becomes like that was because she love me as much as I love her. But sometimes, she crossed the limit. I saw the looked on sunbae's face every time Jan Di shot nasty comments at him and he just accepted it without any complaint. So, I raised my voice at Jan Di to stop her ranting and it worked, like always.

When we all finished, Jan Di was still hesitate to leave me alone with Yi Jeong-sunbae and I had to push her out from my house (with the help from Jun Pyo-sunbae of course). So now, it was just me and Yi Jeong-sunbae.

One of my habits was that I hardly can sleep with a new bed and in a new surroundings and I knew that it was useless to force my body to sleep while my brain actively trying to adapt to it.

So to solve this problem, I have to stay awake for a while until my brain got really tired and finally surrendered to the sleepiness. It almost half an hour had passed by since I leisurely drank my milk in the kitchen while waiting for the right time to sleep. Suddenly I sensed a silhouette creeping slowly towards my direction and I immediately lifted up my face and automatically my lips curl up when I saw him. He looks so 'ordinary' with only clad by a simple grey singlet and a dark blue pyjama bottom.

Seemed like my insomnia have infected him because he also facing the same problem like me. We had a small talked and then followed by an awkward silence because I felt nervous every time I thought about me being alone with him. I knew he was not a Casanova anymore but he is still the So Yi Jeong who became famous as a symbol of carnality.

"Ga Eul-yang, can I…sleep with you." The symbol of carnality finally spoke his desire. I'm not surprise by his appetite but I'm surprise that he was hungry this soon. It's just the first night that we were left alone. "I mean it's easier for me to look after you in case you have difficulties at night." Yeah right. As if I can believe in those words Mr So Yi Jeong. I knew I'm naïve but I'm not 'that' naïve.

I stared at his black orbs. His eyes were full with hope and desire. But there was something in those eyes other than lust. The way he gazed softly at me, the sparkle that present in those eyes only when he looked at me; it was love. Unconsciously, my hand moved to my tummy and I caressed it. If I said yes to his request, it's mean that I agreed to the possibility of giving myself totally to him. But, what more damage can be happen to me? I already am carrying his child for goodness sake! It's not like I can be pregnant again right? My situation now was just the same as a serial killer. No matter how many victims that they killed, they only got sentence to death only once, right? Okay, I shouldn't use that as a metaphor.

Grabbing at my tummy, I finally said yes. He was surprised by my answer and promised me that he won't tell anyone about our dirty little secret. I can't help to let out a hearty laugh when I look at his face. He looks so happy like a little boy who got a cotton candy from the seller.

I was still nervous and still can't sleep after twenty minutes (yes I counted the time to replace it with the sheep) had passed by when I'm in my bed together with him and that nervousness made me lay my body at the very edge of the bed to stay as far as I can from him and my back facing him. I knew he can't sleep too because I can feel the movements from his side. I don't know what I'm waiting for. Maybe part of me wanted him while I'm sober because the last time when we did it, I was completely intoxicated and can't remember anything. The only proof that it had happen was the growing soul inside my tummy.

After thirty seventh minutes (he should receive a pat on his shoulder for lasting this long), he finally made the move. I'm touched by his gesture because he kept asking my permission before proceed with his next move. It started with a light touch, and then his hands got bolder and bolder until there was no space separating me and him. I felt warmth all over my body especially my face as I can feel his hot breath on my neck.

The next stage was his kisses. With his hands travel all around my body, his lips move gently at my bare skin until it reached its target; my lips. I can see his face clearly and was hypnotised by his lovely gaze before he dive in to claim my lips. It was my first conscious kiss and I tried my best to return his kiss with my instinct. I can feel that he was smiling in between those kisses. Was he mocking me because I don't know how to kiss?

His lips got naughtier as they started to travel lower and lower and it ignite the new sensation in my body that I never felt before. Instinctively, I grabbed his head with my hands to urge him to continue what he had started. I can't control the sensation any longer and let out soft moans from my throat. He suddenly stopped all his movement and I can't help to feel disappointed by his action. He looks straight into my eyes and asked;

"Ga Eul-yang, can I … can I…" He was stuttering at his words but I completely understand what he wanted. He was on top of me and of course I can feel his growing needs.

"Sunbae, you only need to asked permission to get something that was not belong to you." This was it, it was now or never. I took a deep breath then continue; "I'm already yours sunbae, since the past, now and forever." I cupped his cheeks and gently caressed it. "Saranghae Yi Jeong-sunbae."

I knew a respectable lady shouldn't offer herself to a man other than her husband no matter what excused that was given. But I am really in love with this man, the father of a child that I'm carrying right now. If he was too afraid of love, then I should be the one who must be brave to teach him love. That love already existed in him; I can feel it with all my being. The way he groaned my name. The way he hungrily kisses me like there was no tomorrow. And his gentle touched that seemed too afraid to hurt me.

He injected me his drug that made me became a hopeless addict. No way I can be heal from this addiction. I felt ashamed of myself yet I can't help to feel contented by this sin. Is this the price I have to pay for being in love with a broken man?

I can feel his chastely kisses all over my face after we reached the highest pleasure of the night. He moved to his side and brought me with him. I laid my head at his bare chest and position my ear right above his heart. I heard a thumping sound racing wildly behind his sternum and I smile when thinking that I am the cause of the wild beating.

I embraced him closer and he also tightens his arms around me. He was stroking my back gently while still kissing my head. A few seconds later, I found myself lost in the other world as my mind surrender to the tiredness and slowly dozed off to sleep.