Chapter 11

If I Didn't Care

On Tuesday, Jessica was in Potions class with the some of her fellow seventh year Hufflepuffs and a few Ravenclaws. She had her book on Advanced Potion Making open in front of her, turned to a page on an Elixir to Induce Euphoria, which was the potion that the class was brewing today.

"So, James and Sirius agreed to help you with your defensive spells?" Dorcas asked as she added shrivelfig to her potion and began to stir it until it started changing from turquoise to blue.

Jessica nodded. "Remus talked to them, and they thought it seemed like a good idea. I'm not sure, but I think Lily and Sophia might help me out, as well." She looked down at her potion, which was green when it was supposed to be brown by now. "Er...that's not right," she said scratching her head in confusion as she pored over her book, reading to herself. "Add porcupine quills till it turns blue, got that, simmer until purple, yup, add seven castor beans...wait..." She looked up at Dorcas. "How many beans did I add?"

"I wasn't exactly watching," Dorcas admitted sheepishly.

"Maybe I should turn the heat up a bit." She set the flame a little higher.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"Why not?" As she said that, the dark green substance began to rise and spill over. Almost immediately the classroom was filled with the putrid smell of rotten eggs and sulfur, making one of Sirius' gaseous discharges smell like peaches.

"No need to worry!" called Professor Slughorn as he waved his wand, removing the smell.

Jessica winced. "Sorry, Professor!"

"Quite all right, Milton, quite all right. Try to be a little more careful next time and follow what the book says exactly," Slughorn said in a tone to indicate there was no harm done.

"Er...it's Merton." He always seemed to get her name wrong. Dorcas' lips twitched in amusement, causing Jessica to glare at her.

Once class ended and they had all been assigned an essay to complete for next time, Dorcas headed to Arithmancy, but Jessica had a free period, so she headed for the library in order to get a head start on, at least, one of her assignments. As she came down a corridor, she spotted James and Sirius peeking around the corner, snickering conspiratorially.

"Do you have them, Padfoot?" whispered James.

"Right here, mate." Sirius pulled something small from his robes and tapped it with his wand. It grew slightly larger, and Jessica saw that it was a red sack filled with something she couldn't see.

"Look at the map and see where he is."

Sirius studied the map. "He's coming, and it would seem that we have ourselves an eavesdropper." He turned his head in the direction that Jessica was hiding. She had all but forgotten about that map. "You wanna help us out, Merton?" he asked. "It looks like McGonagall is coming your way."

Jessica cursed under her breath and stepped back, just as the the Deputy Headmistress came into view. She briefly looked back towards the direction that James and Sirius were located in. Those two owe me, she thought as she hurried towards McGonagall while trying to come up with a lie on the spot in order to distract her.

"Professor, I'm so glad I caught you!" she said, feigning breathlessness. "S-Someone defaced the statue of the one-eyed witch! I th-think they used a special kind of enchanted p-paint. B-Because I c-can't get r-rid of it with Scourgify!"

McGonagall raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure about this, Miss. Merton?" she asked skeptically.

Jessica nodded. "I swear, I-I saw it!"

McGonagall studied Jessica for a moment while the Hufflepuff struggled not to do anything that would give her lie away. "Very well, I'll go check it out." She turned on her heels and began walking briskly away. Jessica watched her leave. Sirius turned to where Jessica was hiding and gave her a thumbs up to indicate that she had done good before pulling, what seemed to be, two balloons from the sack. Jessica frowned. Were they about to throw water balloons at someone? It seemed a bit juvenile for them. Jessica stepped away from her hiding place and approached them.

"Water balloons?" Jessica asked with a raised eyebrow.

James rolled his eyes. "Come off it, Jess. Do you really think we'd do something so immature and trivial?"

Coming from someone who magically pelted Snape with erasers last year, I'd say so, Jessica thought.

"Want in on the action?" Sirius offered another balloon to Jessica, who shook her head.

"I'm not really into pranking people."

"You're no fun," Sirius muttered, pretending to pout, before he levitated his own balloon and James followed suit. Just as Snape rounded the corner, the two Marauders sent the balloons flying towards the dark haired Slytherin. Before Snape could react, the balloons struck him in the face. Right away, a grotesque fungus began to sprout up on his face. James and Sirius burst into fits of laughter.

"I hoped he would have swallowed some," Sirius choked out while wheezing. "It's Fungiface Potion."

"Potter, Black!" Snape bellowed, whipping out his wand. "Stop hiding! I know it was you!"

"I don't think he liked it very much." James smirked as Sirius and they readied their wands. "You might want to get out of here, Jessica. We don't want you caught in the middle."

"We'll see you Wednesday after dinner near the Room of Requirement," Sirius added.

Not wanting to remain behind and risk getting hexed, Jessica turned and hurried away, praying that Snape hadn't noticed her and wouldn't come after her next. There was a part of her, which she liked to call her tiny Gryffindor, who wanted to stay behind with James and Sirius, but the more practical part of her knew that she wouldn't stand a chance. Once she was inside the common room, she headed to the seventh year girls' dormitory, which was empty, sat on her bed, and retrieved her diary from the hiding place. She knew it was juvenile to own such an object, but it was the only safe place where she could restore her innermost secrets, thoughts and emotions regarding certain events.

(Line break)

Remus sat in the Gryffindor common room that evening after dinner with a few rolls of parchment before him, and about three textbooks open. James was sitting in one of the chairs, gushing about a prank that Sirius and he had pulled on Snape earlier while Remus was trying to concentrate on his essays.

"You should've seen the look on Snivellus' face, Moony. That fungus was not about to come off easily," James said proudly. "I wish you could've been there!"

Remus looked up from the pile on the floor. "You two could've gotten caught, you know," he chastised, but his lips twitched in amusement. Part of him may not have approved of his friends' antics, but another part of him enjoyed hearing about them making Snape's life a living hell. While he did often scold them, he had never told on them, or did anything to stop them. He was afraid that, if he started doing so, it would be a reason for them to resent him.

"We might've gotten caught if your girlfriend hadn't distracted McGonagall for us. And you know, not many students can actually do that successfully."

Remus sighed. "I really wish you wouldn't involve my girlfriend in your antics."

"Sorry, mate, but she did make the decision on her own. We didn't exactly force her."

Just as Remus was about to protest, the portrait slid open and the two Gryffindors heard the voices of Sirius and Sophia arguing.

"I don't know why you're so mad at me!" Sirius snapped. "You said you don't care who the hell I snog!"

"I thought it was clear to you!" Sophia hissed, her eyes blazing with anger.

"What's clear?" Snape demanded. "You don't tell me anything! You just throw out vague hints that I can't understand!"

"Penelope!" Sophia bellowed. "Why her? What does she have that I don't?"

"She doesn't have anything that you don't! It's not about who's better! I actually think she's a pretty decent person, despite being a Slytherin! Just because you hate her with a passion, doesn't mean I have to! I mean, it's not like I'm going to impregnate her!"

"I hope you're not stupid enough to do something like that!" Sophia spat.

"You're being ridiculous! I don't care who you snog!"

"Of course you don't, because I don't snog guys that I know you hate! I know how it would make you feel, and I actually care! You don't!"

"If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't have stopped the minute you saw me with Penelope and got upset! Think about that!"

Sophia started to present a counterargument, but seemed to change her mind. "Whatever," she muttered as she stomped up the stairs to the girls' dormitories where Sirius couldn't follow. The grey-eyed Gryffindor plopped down next to James and sighed in frustration.

"Sometimes I think that we're better off being friends," Sirius said dejectedly. "I don't know how to get it through her head that I do care about her. I've tried everything!"

"Have you tried actually sitting down and talking with her?" Remus asked, rubbing his temples. A head-ache had formed from listening to Sirius and Sophia's argument.

"Of course I have! But all she seems to want to do is yell at me! I don't know why I put up with it," He folded his arms across his chest huffily.

"Cheer up, mate," James said slapping Sirius heartily on the back. "She'll come around. You just have to give her time to cool down."

"Time to cool down for what?" Lily asked as she came through the portrait hole.

"Nevermind," SIrius muttered.

Lily shrugged. "I probably don't want to know. Anyways, I got this book from the library for Jessica. It features all sorts of defensive spells and detailed descriptions on how to cast them. I figured that when she's not learning from us, she can learn from this book."

"Nice going, Lily," James said in admiration as she sat next to him.

"I know," Lily said smugly. "I'll give it to her tomorrow."

Remus closed his books and sat up, slightly. "Mind if I take a look at the book?" Lily nodded and handed it to him. "I'll look through it and make a list of the spells we'll try and teach her, and have her practice in her spare time." He opened the book and pulled a fresh piece of parchment towards him and began to scribble down the names of a few basic spells that might benefit Jessica.

(Line Break)

The next evening, Jessica came downstairs into the common room after changing out of her robes and into something more casual. About six Hufflepuffs were down in the common room, including Dorcas, Amos, and Trudy. Dorcas looked up when Jessica walked past.

"You about to head to the Room of Requirement?"

Jessica nodded. "Do you want to come with me?"

"No thanks. I need to finish this Potions essay. You might want to start on yours when you get back too."

Jessica grimaced, wishing her friend hadn't reminded her. The essay was due tomorrow, and she hadn't even touched it yet.

"Wait up, Jess," Amos said standing up. "I'll walk you there."

"I can get there fine by myself," Jessica protested.

"Nonsense, I'm just trying to do a fellow Hufflepuff a favor," he said in a friendly tone as he held the entrance open for her.

Jessica hesitated for a moment, before stepping through. "Have you asked Dorcas to Slughorn's Halloween party?" she asked as they walked down the corridors. They weren't exactly breaking any rules since they were still allowed to be out at this time, so Jessica didn't feel as anxious.

"She said she'd go with me, but I think it's mostly out of curiosity. She's never been to one of them before."

"So, she still has no idea that you like her?"

Amos shook his head. "I haven't really had the guts to tell her. It's not as easy as it seems. I have better luck saying it to my reflection."

Jessica chortled. "Don't tell me you actually practice in front of the mirror," she teased.

"Of course I do! Although, I don't know if it helps build my confidence."

"But you're one of the most confident people I know."

"Not when it comes to a girl I like, apparently."

Jessica said a silent prayer that Amos would succeed, and that Dorcas would reciprocate his feelings. They would make such a cute couple. They were both optimistic and cheerful. Not to mention, Amos was one of the nicest guys that Jessica knew.

"There's Remus," Amos said, pulling Jessica away from her thoughts. Sure enough, Remus was standing outside the Room of Requirement. Jessica could have sworn she saw a strange expression pass over his face as she approached with Amos, but it passed so quickly, that she was sure it must have been her imagination.

"Here she is, all safe and sound," Amos said. "Good luck, Jess." He patted her on the shoulder, then turned and headed back to the Hufflepuff common room.

"You ready?" Remus asked.

Jessica hesitated, so many thoughts running through her head. What if this was a mistake? What if she was unable to successfully do this? What would happen if she had to put these spells into practice against those who tormented her? Would she clam up again?

"Jessica?"

She pushed away the thoughts as an expression of determination crossed her face and she nodded. "As I'll ever be."

Remus smiled and, after thrice walking past the wall, the door appeared, and the two of them stepped inside.