Chapter Seventeen:

It had been a month since Mara and Luke had returned to the Alliance, the first week of which she had spent in a locked room with various Alliance High Command members giving them every bit of information she felt they needed. She left out her full past, merely giving them enough of the truth to let them know she had in fact been a high-level special agent.

The time she hadn't been in the Council's crosshairs, she'd spent with Luke. They had worked on many things together during this, such as the maintenance for his X-wing, or her showing him hand-to-hand techniques.

Lastly, Mara had gotten to know Leia better, to the point at which Mara had clearly felt she should tell the brunette the full truth of her history. The conversation between Mara, Luke, Han and Leia had been… interesting to say the least.

But while Leia and Han had been a little more wary of her ever since, Mara could also see and feel that they appreciated her trust in them. Now things were better between them, if still a little nervous.

These thoughts ran through Mara's head as she stood in her shower, rinsing off the day's dirt and grime. She was now also back to the lithe, perfectly toned body she'd maintained before the Emperor's demise.

To say Luke's interest in her had grown exponentially with her rising health— not in a perverted way: Mara knew he loved her for who she was— would be an understatement. He couldn't take his eyes off her some days, which Mara found both amusing and a little intimidating, if only because she wasn't used to that kind of attention.

One thing she noticed he had developed a fondness for was running his hands through her hair whenever he could… or whenever she'd allow it.

When she asked him why he did it, his reply had been that he loved its color, and how silky soft it was.

Now Mara ran her own fingers through it, loosening the strands to let the shampoo rinse free. Frowning slightly, Mara noticed that she felt weary… much more so than she should. In fact, her body was telling her to get some rest.

Shrugging it off as the excitement of the last month catching up with her, Mara finished her shower and then simply stood under the spray, allowing it to sooth her skin.

Idly, the thought of what she and Luke would have for breakfast in the morning crossed her mind. She had a craving for a slice of Andmuarrian toast, smothered in a good dollop of whipped topping, maybe a strizzleberry or two… Finish it off with a pair of perfectly cooked eggs, and a slice of breakfast meat…

Mara's mouth watered at the thought of the meal she already had planned out, wondering when she'd become so precise about what she ate.

However, to her dismay, a sudden urge in her stomach sent her flying from the shower to bend over the toilet. Mara somehow managed not to slip in her own puddle of shower-water as she emptied her dinner into the basin.

She trembled from the exertion, her arms quivering as they kept her head from following her meal into the 'bowl. When she felt she was finished, Mara fell back against the wall, breathing heavily and trying to stop quivering.

Dimly realizing that the shower was still running, Mara used the Force to shut it off. Water on a spaceship was not something to carelessly waste.

However, when she also used the Force to retrieve a towel, Mara paused as something flickered at the edge of her awareness. Frowning, Mara turned her attention in that direction… but came up blank.

Shrugging again, Mara managed to stand and dry off, wrapping the towel about her body and brushing her hair. However, once again something felt… off. Not wrong, per se, just… off.

Mara didn't know how else to describe it, or what to make of it. With now uncertain strokes, Mara finished with her hair, letting the damp locks hang freely. Next Mara removed her towel and began to pull on her sleep clothes when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror.

Tilting her head, Mara stepped closer, examining herself with a critical eye. Did her chest look more… full? She turned first left, then right, eyeing her frame closely. She pursed her lips, lifting a brow.

Well, if she was regaining her health, it might stand to reason her breasts would also change.

Just as Mara was ready to go to bed, she happened to look lower upon her turn away from the mirror… and promptly froze.

Mara stepped as close to the mirror as she could and still see clearly, turning every which way until she was absolutely certain she was not hallucinating.

Was that a… a bump on her stomach? No, it wasn't, but her waist was definitely thicker than it had ever been before. With a startled furrow to her brow, Mara recalled that flicker in the Force.

Abruptly her heart thudded, a painful thump that did nothing to quell her sudden nerves.

With no small amount of apprehension, Mara stretched out with the Force again, this time focusing purposely on the space between her hips. It took her a good moment, since she wasn't familiar with this technique, but when she did make her discovery— confirming her suspicion— Mara's mind went numb with shock.

Pregnant?!

NO! Mara shrieked mentally. I can't be pregnant! How… what… where…when?

What was she going to do?

Panic rapidly engulfed her, and Mara stumbled from the refresher and into her room, where she shakily dressed into her sleep clothes.

How was this possible? What did she do now?

Her entire body shaking with fear, Mara was on the verge of sobbing when a familiar presence hesitantly probed her mind, no doubt sensing her agitation.

Coming to a lightning-quick decision, Mara ruthlessly steeled her face and body into stoic compliance and stepped out into the hall, making a bee-line for Luke's quarters. She was profusely grateful it was Home One's sleep cycle, which meant far fewer people for her to run into.

00000

When Luke felt Mara panicking, he nearly stormed from his room to get to her, but then he sensed her performing that same act, so he waited on pins and needles. Her presence drew rapidly neared, saturated with a level of raw fear Luke had never seen in her before.

By the time she knocked on his door, Luke was beside himself with worry.

"Mara!" he breathed as she stepped through.

Luke locked the door behind her and turned… only to find Mara a nervous wreck. She paced his room without direction, her entire body shaking, and her eyes almost wild. She was muttering something under her breath and Luke had to strain to try to hear, but it was pointless.

"Mara, what's wrong?" Luke finally asked when he could stand it no longer.

As if forgetting he was there, Mara started, but then she saw him and she dissolved into sobs, throwing herself into his arms.

Both confused and rapidly losing his own cool, Luke held Mara, stroking her back.

"Mara…"

"I'm pregnant!" she wailed, grabbing his tunic with both hands as if to emphasize appoint he couldn't comprehend. "Pregnant!"

Luke was shocked speechless for the space of several heartbeats. When at last he found his voice, it was little more than a squeak.

"Wh-what?"

Mara pulled away, her red-rimmed eyes gazing into his. "I'm pregnant, Luke! I don't know how! I didn't let any of the men actually sleep with me!"

Luke closed his eyes and took a steadying breath. When he reopened them, Mara had pulled away to sit on the floor, rocking back and forth. Luke knelt before her and gently took hold of her arms.

"Mara, it's okay…"

"Don't say that!" Mara railed, suddenly angry. "How can you say it'll be okay?"

Luke opened his mouth to reply, but Mara cut him off.

"I can't be pregnant! I've been protected since I was old enough to conceive." Her eyes spilled over yet again and when she looked to him, her eyes were begging him for help. "How did this happen?"

Luke thought it over. "No one got into the bed with you while you were with Garris?"

"None," Mara affirmed. "I think I'd remember."

Luke pursed his lips. "And you didn't have sex before Palpatine's death?"

Mara shook her head. "No."

He shrugged helplessly… until a sick thought occurred to him, and he found he wanted to throw up. Mara noticed his sudden unease, and stiffened.

"What?" she demanded.

"Mara… how long did you say it was between your capture and when you woke in Garris's… room?" Luke asked hesitantly.

"A week," Mara answered, then frowned thoughtfully. "Or so he said, I had no way to tell if he was lying about that."

Luke gave her a pained look. "It must have happened during that time."

Mara's eyes widened. "You think either the spacer, or… Garris himself did this before I woke?" She swallowed rising bile. "I think I'm going to be sick… again."

She turned her face away from him then, looking even more miserable; something Luke hadn't thought possible.

"It has to be that," Mara whispered weakly. "One of them took advantage of me while I was unconscious and helpless." Then she laughed: a short, bitter sound. "At least I can't remember any of it."

Luke thinned his lips. "I'm so sorry they did this to you Mara."

She didn't answer, but nor would she look at him. Luke felt her self-loathing, her sense of degradation, but most of all the potent fear. Luke leaned in to try catching her gaze.

"Hey…" he said gently, but Mara merely gritted her teeth and looked further away. "Please look at me."

Mara didn't move for a long moment, but then something in her crumpled, and she turned to face him. That was when he saw a new type of dread: she was afraid he was going to abandon her now.

"Mara, I'm not mad, or disgusted," Luke assured her.

"How can you just sit there and act like this isn't a horrible thing? That I'm not a rotten woman?" Mara demanded, but her fire had left her.

Luke chose his words with care, but let her feel the conviction of each one. "How it happened was horrible, Mara. That is as far as my anger at this goes. No one has the right to treat a woman that way. Especially you." He touched her face. "I love you, Mara, and I am not going to push you away just because you were violated. I am here for you no matter what."

Her gaze had widened, Luke noted, and Mara's lips parted slightly.

"What did you say?" she whispered, as though afraid that she'd heard him wrong.

"I'm here for you…" Luke began, but she shook her head.

"Not that, the other part."

Luke blinked… then it clicked, and he smiled softly. "It's true, Mara. I do love you."

In all the time they'd spent together, and as much as they both felt for the other, neither one had actually said those three little words.

Until now.

Mara sniffled again, placing her hand over his where it still held her cheek tenderly. "You love me?"

"Completely… utterly… with my whole being..." Luke vowed. "I never want to be apart from you, Mara. Ever."

For the first time since storming into his room, Mara smiled. It was a watery one, but so luminescent it could have lit up a room.

"I love you too, Luke," she murmured. "I love you so much."

Then her smile faded, and tears leaked from her eyes at a high rate, though she didn't actually sob.

"Luke, what am I going to do? I don't know anything about children… let alone babies! And… I am not mother material. What am I going to do?"

Luke tilted her chin. "I'll tell you what you're going to do."

She waited with lifted brow.

"You're not going to worry about anything tonight," Luke whispered, standing.

He pulled Mara to her feet, supporting her as her knees wobbled. Luke then led her to the bed, where he helped her to lie down. He moved to kneel beside the bunk, but Mara caught his hand.

"Lie with me? Please?" she implored. "I need to be held."

Luke nodded and climbed in behind her, gathering her to him.

"Mara, you will be a wonderful Mother," he murmured into her hair after a time.

"How can you know?"

"Because I know you," he answered. "And behind that tough exterior lies the heart of a guru bear."

Recognizing the compliment, Mara smiled against his chest. "You are too good to me, Luke."

"I'll never be good enough, but I will spend the rest of my days trying to be," Luke said evenly. "If you'll let me."

"I thought you'd never ask."