V

Later that afternoon, exhausted from putting together the list of people allowed to the funeral, Jounouchi stops by the Kame Game Shop. The interior is unchanged from their teenage years - except for the owner.

Yuugi is leaning against the counter reading a Duel Monsters magazine. Jounouchi hadn't even realized they were still in print - Duel Monsters has changed so much since he was a teenager; he hasn't played in so long that he can't even follow the tournaments any more.

Yuugi was still largely the same. His face was more lined, his structure more padded, but his most distinctive feature - oh, that hair - is still as recognizable as ever. It's shorter, a bit less wild, just barely touched with grey, but it's definitely Yuugi.

"Keeping up appearances?" Jounouchi asks, smiling for the first time since Kaiba's death. Yuugi looks up and wilts, coming around the corner to hug Jounouchi tight around the chest. "Hey, we're men. Men don't hug."

Yuugi laughs. "I've been so worried since I heard." He backs away at arm's length. "How are you holding up?"

Jounouchi shrugs. He looks into Yuugi's face, and knows that they should say something - say anything about what's happened... but he can't. He scrambles for a topic, and all he can come up with is: "I've been better."

He removes himself from Yuugi's concerned orbit, crossing his arms over his chest for an insecure moment. He could tell Yuugi anything: he could talk about his dreams, about the adoption, about his desperation, but it all felt so wrong. Jounouchi has always been the strong one.

Aware of the silence, unable to fill it with Yuugi wants to hear, he falls back on small talk: "You won't believe who I ran into."

Yuugi raises an eyebrow, stepping back.

"Bakura's daughter - Alice. He's letting her work at the airport?"

"She insisted. I wouldn't have, but she's not my daughter. Would you like a drink? I put some coffee on not too long ago." Yuugi ushers him around the counter and to the door behind it that lead into the house.

"Should you leave the shop unattended?"

Yuugi sighs. "We'll hear if anyone enters." The word if is so heavily weighted that it says enough. Jounouchi follows him into the sunny little kitchen, the aroma of strong coffee lifting his spirits a bit. He expects Yuugi's grandfather to come bustling through talking about the high school girls, expecting their friends to...

He catches his reflection in a mirrored "Home Sweet Home" sign that has been there since before Yuugi was born. His lined face, his sorrow-heavy eyes, the fine streaks of silver in his hair...

Yuugi sets two mugs on the table and indicates for Jounouchi to sit. Jounouchi does so, humbled by his reflection. Adam's homework is on the table in front of his mug.

Yuugi's son is nine, and well known to Jounouchi. He remembers showing the newborn's pictures to Kaiba. It was the third time they had discussed children, and when they had finally agreed that they were too old and settled to start.

When they were looking over the papers for Michael's adoption, Kaiba quietly confessed that he'd always been scared. Jounouchi had agreed.

"How are Adam and Anzu?" The sounds contrast strangely - Adam being the closest name Yuugi to find to "Atemu." Kaiba had - conspicuously - never commented on the choice.

"Well. Anzu is teaching dance class at the school this year, and Adam enjoys his new teacher. How long are you staying in Domino?"

Jounouchi sips his coffee and tries not to wish it were something stronger. "Until I'm dead as well." The prospect doesn't sound entirely unwelcome. "I can't go back to California now."

"What about your - "

"I don't think I'll keep him, but they're still waiting for me to make that decision." The ache of another loss feels like a coating on Jounouchi's skin.

Yuugi shakes his head. "You should. You can't begin to expect what it's like, and Kaiba wouldn't - "

"Don't." Jounouchi only barely quells shaking hands; he sees the tremor in the surface of his coffee. He takes another sip of his coffee without tasting it, filling his mouth and buying time to avoid talking about this. "I can't. Right now I just want to get through the funeral. It's tomorrow. Will you come?"

Yuugi nods, looking down into his drink. "I'm already tired of funerals. Every year there seems to be another. Did you hear about Mai?"

The mention of an old flame shakes Jounouchi just a little bit, recalling his last fling before he'd thrown himself into Kaiba and never looked back. They hadn't spoken in over a decade. "No."

"Motorcycle accident last year. They did a nice article on her life in the magazine. Not that people even know who was she was in the circles, or the things she did behind the scenes. It's all kids; if you even..." Yuugi snorts. "I'm starting to sound like Grandpa. He'd laugh if he heard me."

Jounouchi nods. The silence stretches, and Jounouchi tries to think of all the things he should be saying. He thinks about his mother. He should have called her by now - she might want to know that her only son is falling apart. "How's your mom?"

"Alright, all things considered. She doesn't have cancer, thankfully, but she's starting to remember less. She still remembers Adam, though."

"Good."

Small talk was a bad idea. Jounouchi feels pent-up, stretched at the seams. He stands abruptly, looking into the refrigerator. The same crappy beer his father used to drink. Jounouchi closes the refrigerator and rests his head against the freezer door.

"I can't do this anymore, Yuugi. It feels like years already, and he's not even buried. And the kid... How am I supposed to pull it together?" Jounouchi changes his mind; he gets a crappy beer from the refrigerator and looks at Yuugi after he the first sip.

Yuugi is the strong one, now that Jounouchi really considers the situation. Yuugi in their teens would have cried for him, heart-broken and raw. Yuugi in their mid-life looks him in the eye, only looking a little heart-broken. "A little early, isn't it?"

"It helps."

"Maybe now. In a month, when you can't face the day without a drink... Don't become your father, Jounouchi. You've already come too close to that."

In his late twenties, overwhelmed by the foreign culture he still didn't feel comfortable in and fearing his choice to stay with the absent, workaholic partner who hardly noticed him. Yuugi was the one to notice, even with an ocean between them. Jounouchi looks him in the eye, and can't keep it in any longer.

"I haven't been alone in so long, Yuugi. I don't know how to do it." Jounouchi sounds so small to his own ears - so lost. Kaiba had been the one to make him face facts all those years ago.

Kaiba wasn't here anymore.

Notes
Everyone give mad props to Kagi, who worked her ass off on this one - it took us something like an hour or two in IM trying to hammer this out and make it work. I think we did solid work; I swear a third of it is hers, lol. =D But this is a transitionary chapter into Bigger and Better things coming, so that's exciting. And the piece is actually finished! It's just a matter of working it all out.

I hope you liked it!

[Whoring]
Also, if any of y'all are interested, sometime in the distance future (think mid-fall to early winterish?) I plan to totally release an original novella online - totally gratis, y'know, and not interfering with my future fanfic plans! - and I figured I'd let you know that those things will come up on my "professional" site: ashleympoland[dot]com. Check it out!
[/whoring]