Hey guys! I promise the wait was worth it for this one... I've been waiting all week to post it and finally found some time tonight to go over it and make sure it was ready to go.
Enjoy!
Chapter 14
"I can't believe you've been able to keep this from her all weekend."
Nick looked up from his spot on the ground, facing Jess as she spoke. They were laying out a blanket on the grass after another drive to the outskirts of Chicago. This adventure had led them to a community park on the side of a hill, just high enough to overlook the neighborhood below.
He laughed, watching Aly closely as she explored the park just out of earshot. "It helped that the whole family didn't come along."
"And how exactly did you manage that?" Jess asked, with a hint of honest curiosity. She put the cooler they had brought along on top of the quilt and took a seat. Nick joined her, taking in the setting sun.
"Well," Nick admitted, "they've never come to this."
"Really?" Jess turned to look at him, noticing for the first time how small of a crowd was actually at the park.
He nodded. "Me and Winston had some friends in high school that lived out here. We would come out here on Memorial Day to kick off the summer. Wasn't ever a Miller thing, really."
"Oh," Jess responded. "So is this like a neighborhood thing?"
"You could say that," Nick laughed. "Fireworks aren't exactly big on Memorial Day, but since everyone in Chicago goes to the big show in the city on July 4th, I guess these people wanted a reason to celebrate."
She smiled. His heart leapt.
"Whatever works, right?"
Nick caught her eye and couldn't help but return her smile. They sat there for a moment, their eyes flickering between each other's gaze and Aly, who seemed to take notice of their watching. She skipped over to them, taking her seat right in between them.
She had a stuffed cat in her lap, to which she had already christened Nick. He wasn't sure exactly how he felt about that, yet. Bonnie had found it in some of Nick's old possessions when Jess realized she hadn't packed Aly's usual favorite, Elvis, and a cranky toddler without her favorite stuffed animal threatened a meltdown. Luckily, Nick the cat did the trick.
Saturday had worn her out – she spent most of the afternoon in drastic need of a nap – so they took it easy the next morning, and just explored the city on their last full day in Chicago. She needed to be well rested for his big plans.
"Are we having a picnic? Is that the surprise?" Aly finally asked. She'd been hinted at a surprise all day, and was obviously quite anxious to get it.
He laughed and pulled out a few sandwiches from the basket. "Part of it, yes."
They ate while listening to Aly chatter about her stuffed animal's newest adventure, exchanging a few chuckles when Aly managed to smear mayonnaise across her face. When the sun finally set, and the little crowd gathered at the park had all turned their attention to the sky, Nick did the same.
When the first whistle sounded, Nick and Jess both turned to look at Aly as the flare went off, casting a red glow across her face and leaving smoky streaks in the night sky.
"Fireworks!" She squealed happily, clearly delighted. A few more pops followed, and streams of sparklers lit up the sky in front of them.
It wasn't anything close to a Fourth of July bash – it could barely even be considered a show, as it only lasted about five minutes – but the smile plastered on Aly's face the rest of the night made the trek worthwhile.
Nick's eyes had been on Aly for most of the show, just watching her expressions change with every pop and flash. So many different expressions, wrapped up into one tiny face. There was joy, hope, and pure delight etched onto the outline of her face, a sprinkle of someone else in a face that he saw so much of himself in. She was exactly half of him and half of Jess.
Towards the end, Nick looked up just in time to see that Jess still wasn't watching the fireworks, either. Strangely enough, she also wasn't watching Aly.
Her eyes were set on him, a gentle smile playing at her lips.
When his gaze met hers, she looked down quickly. Nick wasn't sure if it was the glow of the fireworks, or the warm night air, but he could've sworn he saw the slight tinge of a blush creeping into her cheeks.
What a night.
Hours after all of the fireworks were over, and the sleepy almost-family finally crawled into their respective beds, Nick found himself jolted awake from his spot on the couch. In the early hours of the morning, it took awhile for his eyes to adjust to the dark living room. He wasn't exactly sure why he had woken, and started to settle back into his pillow, until he heard a cry.
It was quite unmistakably Aly.
He bolted upright, suddenly wide-awake, and bounded up the stairs. His heart was hammering inside of his chest, a million possible scenarios playing out in his head.
However, once he yanked open the door to his old bedroom, in the lamplight he saw his daughter pulled into the arms of Jess as she whispered words of comfort. One of Jess's flannel numbers had clear spots on them where Aly's tears had pooled. Jess's tired eyes fell on Nick, and she patted a spot on the cot next to them.
Nick sat down, calming down from his panic. He could've walked into worse situations.
"What happened?" he asked, taking Aly's face and swiping away a few tears with his thumb.
"The water monster," she sniffed. Nick threw a puzzled look Jess's way, and she looked up to mouth nightmare.
Poor girl.
"He got you, Daddy," she continued. "I was so scared."
Daddy. Had she really just said it?
She may have mumbled something else, but Nick only heard that one word - a word that he hadn't realized he was so desperate to hear. He had hoped it would happen eventually, but had started to resign to the fact that he may always be just Nick to her. Jess had argued with his worry and told him that it would come; always so confident, even when he wasn't.
"I'm okay," he soothed, "I'm here, see?"
Aly finally seemed to realize that, and when she stuck a hand out to touch his face, he pulled her from Jess's lap and into his own. It was a final moment of acceptance, as if to reassure him that he wasn't just some guy that took care of her. She molded right into him, settling against his arm, like she had been made to be there.
She had called him daddy.
At her words, it was as if his lungs had released a breath of air that had been held in since he saw her at Jess's doorstep, and his head was spinning with the new sensation. True, he'd always been her father. There wasn't a moment in her life where that wasn't a fact, but over the span of three years and a less-than-ideal reunion, it had taken up until this moment for him to really feel like he was her dad. It was a term that he never truly thought would be associated with him, let alone an accepted idea.
Nick just wished, in that moment, that it wasn't because she was scared senseless.
He held her tighter, never wanting this feeling to end. Even though the hour was getting to him, and he felt his eyelids grow heavy, he couldn't leave. He just couldn't. Nick sat there, stroking her hair, until the hiccups subsided. She sniffed again, but it appeared that the tears had at least stopped.
"It wasn't real," Nick breathed, holding her head against him. "It was just a dream."
"What if it happens again?" Aly squeaked out. Jess took this moment to step in, and put a finger under her daughter's chin, gently pulling it up.
"Then we will be brave and fight him off, won't we?" Jess suggested. Aly looked back at her, nodding weakly. He adjusted so she could lie back down on her cot, pulling the blankets back around her. Nick and Jess slid off of the cot, their shoulders touching at the side of the bed. Then, quieter, "We're here for you, too."
"Will you stay?" She pleaded with the two of them.
"I'll be right up here, if you want to sleep in the big bed, and Nick will be right downstairs," Jess explained. It almost physically pained Nick to think he'd have to leave the room for the night.
Not after what she said.
Aly, though, seemed to accept this and pulled her stuffed cat close.
It was almost like they moved together, and effortless balance, as they tucked Aly back in. Jess began to hum the tune that had become so familiar to him over the past few months, and he joined in at the chorus, thankful that Jess's voice was so much stronger than his own.
"So don't let me be, let me be, let me be lonely, tonight," she wiped a few more drops of moisture from Aly's face. They continued, "while we're young and alive. Take the keys to my car and the keys to my heart and just drive…"
Nick tucked the quilt closer around her, brushing the stray hairs out of her face in the process. She was asleep fairly quickly, and each of them took a turn giving her a kiss goodnight.
When Nick looked up this time, he was met by the same look that he'd seen from Jess earlier that night. The compassion in her eyes added too much emotion to what he was already experiencing. He smiled back at her weakly, starting out into the hallway before Jess stopped him.
"Nick," she whispered, "why don't I go downstairs, and you stay up here?"
He shook his head, and then motioned toward the door for Jess to follow. He didn't want to chance waking Aly up again… They had a long day of travel tomorrow.
"Just come get me if you need me," he replied once the door clicked shut. Jess slid to the floor, and Nick took the spot next to her.
"She was asking for you," Jess confessed. "I just… I didn't want to wake you up."
"Don't worry about that," he asserted. "You shouldn't have to stay up all night when I'm twenty feet away."
Jess leaned her head up against the door and closed her eyes. He could tell she was fighting a yawn. Then, a sly smirk appeared on her lips. Nick raised his eyebrows.
"It happened, didn't it?" She turned her gaze to him. Now that his eyes had adjusted to the dark, the blue of her irises was hard not to notice. How long had it been since he'd seen that much life in her?
He felt warmth start to fill his chest. "Yeah, I think so. She finally said it."
"She's always known it, though," Jess contested, putting a hand on his shoulder. "She loved you like a dad before she even knew."
"You think?" He smiled.
"I do," she confirmed. Against the door, it was hard to completely grasp how much they'd changed in the past few months – or even in the past few years – and he saw her just like he did when she'd moved into the loft.
He saw the sweet, quirky, almost naïve woman who had him wrapped up in her before he even knew he was falling.
He put an arm around her and she settled into him, just like old times. He'd spent so long reflecting on everything that had been wrong with them. He'd done nothing but be angry about what had changed, about what he could have done differently.
But, sitting against his childhood bedroom door with Jess curled up to his side, he saw everything that had been right. He saw their first kiss, the look on her face after he'd stolen her away from Teddy. He remembered the feeling of driving away with her after Cece's not wedding. Most of all, he remembered her touch in the morning, how it was the first person awake's job to steal the morning kiss. He'd never been able to replicate that sensation.
The feeling of her lips against his was one he would never forget.
Still… It had been too long.
He looked down at her, while she adjusted to see him better. The emotions were raging; the thinking was not coming as quickly as Nick would've liked. He knew better, he really knew he did, but that still didn't stop him from lowering his head down to hers. He gave her time to back away. He lingered above her face for a split second, his eyes finding hers, waiting for permission.
She didn't back down, so neither did he.
The gap was so much smaller than he thought, tearing down all of the walls that had come with it. When their lips met, he was brought back to a fourth floor loft in the middle of LA, where a middle school teacher had moved in with a seemingly good-for-nothing bartender, and turned his entire world upside down.
It had been entirely too long.
He thought he had remembered. This… This had nothing on what he remembered.
Her lips moved with his, the arm that had been around her shoulders now encircling her waist. His free hand found her cheek, while her arms wound themselves around his neck. He adjusted himself on the floor, pulling her against the door.
Jess responded equally as eager, working her fingers through the hair on the back of his head. She pressed herself ever closer, and the flannel of her pajamas was such a familiar feeling against his skin… It was almost like coming home.
He could feel her heartbeat under his touch. The way it was fluttering as their intentions spiraled out of control was driving him absolutely insane.
They pushed against the door, and it creaked menacingly.
"Aly!" Jess squeaked against his lips, pushing Nick back. He froze. Her cheeks were flush, her eyes wide. She put a finger to her lips, and waited. Each passing second played out in slow motion, as if it was just waiting for reality to finally hit Nick.
When it was clear that they had not woken Aly, Jess got up and brushed herself off, all without looking Nick in the eye. The cold was settling back in, an uneasy end to such an unforgettable moment.
As she turned to open the door, he put a hand on her shoulder.
"Jess – "
"I can't do this, Nick," she hissed. He didn't pull away.
"Look, I know – "
"You have a fiancée!" She interrupted.
Oh.
That.
His insides twisted. He looked away, unable to deny that truth, and wishing he could more than ever. Nick felt the realization crash on him.
"I'm… I'm sorry," he replied, taking her hand off of her shoulder. She bit her lip, almost sadly, but nodded at his apology and slipped through the door, clicking it shut without another word.
He pulled his hand down his face.
Leave it to Nick Miller to recreate the most incredible kiss of his life, all while he had a fiancée some thousand miles away, waiting for him to return. Hell, he'd talked to her on the phone right before they had headed off to the fireworks.
How could he forget his life with her?
As he walked down the stairs, he felt even worse when he realized that such a question wasn't even the top on his mind.
As much as he hated himself to admit it, there was another that was consuming his entire thought process…
After that, how in the world could he forget his life with Jess?
Apologies for any weird autocorrect that could have happened as I was editing this. I know that's what I get for doing this on my phone, but I really wanted to get this up ASAP!
Newgirl78, as usual, was a huge help. She's always ready to catch the little details that make these kind of chapters work.
I'm particularly excited to see what you guys thought of this chapter!