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CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

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A/N:- Banner by FatesLoveQueen /oed60p

I own nothing. Boydblog helped me with this and I'll be forever thankful.

She fixed. I fiddled. Any mistakes that remain are on me.

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~ BELLA CULLEN ~

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The silence after my heart stopped was deafening.

I kept my eyes closed, in fear that I'd find myself somewhere else entirely. I worried I could be in a place where nothing existed; where the knowledge I gained from my other world or the pain of my transformation meant nothing.

Slowly, sounds began to register. I could hear a dog barking in the distance. I could hear cars passing by at high speed. I could hear the distant howl of a wolf.

In my immediate vicinity though, there was absolute silence. Not even the sound of breathing.

"Bella?"

I opened my eyes quickly and turned my head to the side when I heard his voice. I smiled involuntarily as I saw his eyes; happiness radiated from their depths as he looked at me.

"Edward," I whispered reverently.

I'd never truly understood just how beautiful he was. Even in the soft light filtering through the windows, his skin was slightly luminescent to my new eyes. I watched in awe as the refraction of light caused a kaleidoscope of colors to dance across his features. It was beautiful and mesmerizing. I wanted to stay in that moment forever; watching him watching me.

He raised our joined hands to his face and stroked the back of my hand across his cheek. The gentle touch seemed to rush through my body in an electric jolt, sending life and vitality to every cell. It was like I'd been reborn a second time in as many minutes. The simple touch wasn't enough—not nearly close to enough—I needed to feel more than the soft contact he had allowed. I rolled my body toward him, captured the back of his head with my free hand and pulled his head towards mine.

"Omph," he grunted as our lips met with an almost-violent crash.

I was going to apologize but instantly he'd sensed what I needed—or perhaps he needed it as well—and was kissing me back. I allowed the sensation of his lips, his teeth, and his tongue—every part of his mouth—to consume me.

He released my hand and then his fingers were running through my hair to caress the back of my neck.

I pulled him closer to me as I rolled over onto my back again, dragging him along with me. He moaned against my mouth; his chest rested against mine. He caressed my cheek and ran long fingers back and forth over my jaw.

The memories of my other world lingered in my mind and I thought about the heat Edward and I had shared there. I thought about how our bodies wrapped naturally around one another and how we moved in fluid motion. I was ready to experience all of that and more with this Edward—my real Edward. The one who was no longer worried he would hurt me, he'd made that clear in the urgency of his kiss.

A throat cleared somewhere close—too close to be in another room—and I was alerted to the presence of others. I was unwilling to release Edward, but realized it would be far too indecent if we continued. Reluctantly, I broke from our kiss. Edward seemed just as unwilling to break the contact and rested his forehead against mine.

"Hi," I whispered.

"Wow," was all he could respond with.

I knew that if I'd still been human, I would have been blushing red. Edward seemed to have the same thought. He brought his hand to my face and stroked my cheek lightly.

"I'm going to miss that," he said wistfully.

Did he hear my thoughts?

I sat up, at least that was my intention, but I ended up standing, tipping Edward off me in the process. He righted himself immediately, and flew backwards away from me.

The atmosphere in the room felt thick with tension.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

It was almost like there was a threat in the room. I was instantly alert by the change. I turned one way and then the other, looking for the intruder.

A slow smile spread across Edward's lips. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing."

I watched his smile and then glanced around at his family again. They were visibly more relaxed as soon as the words left Edward's mouth.

Then I realized I was the threat.

"What did I do wrong?" I asked.

Edward chuckled. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"None of us have ever seen a newborn so…in control," Jasper said. "We're waiting for the moment when the thirst gets too much."

Almost as soon as he implied it, the fire that had raged in my throat since waking, became the sole focus in my mind.

Edward frowned at Jasper before stepping closer to me. He traced a finger along my throat. "You need to hunt. There'll be time to talk later."

I shook my head. "I want to talk now, there's so much I want to know."

Edward's hand shifted so that he cupped my cheek. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

I raised my hand to find Edward's and interlaced our fingers.

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything."

Edward laughed. "You might need to be just a little bit more specific."

I tried to focus my mind back to my last memory of this world. The fear and pain I felt was muddled with feelings of overwhelming love for Edward from the other world Kieran had sent me to.

"I want to know what happened after Kieran…" I trailed off, wondering how much Edward knew about what happened. I recalled Kieran confirming that Edward had changed me, but I wasn't sure whether Edward had rescued me from Kieran's jaws or whether Kieran had found the strength to do it himself. "Just tell me everything that I don't know."

"I'll tell you anything you want to know, on one condition," Edward said.

I tilted my head in confusion.

"You hunt, I'll talk."

"I do believe I've heard that somewhere before."

A vague human memory flooded into my mind. 'You eat, I'll talk.'

Edward laughed, no doubt recalling the conversation in much greater detail than I could. He had the advantage of being immortal at the time. Even with only a few brief moments of immortality behind me, I realized just how differently the world appeared through my new eyes.

I was about to ask where we would go for my first hunt when Edward growled softly. I felt and heard movement behind me, which drew my attention.

Kieran offered me an anxious smile as he moved closer to where Edward and I stood.

I could feel Edward's body stiffen beside mine and I squeezed his hand gently in return.

"Bella," Kieran's voice was soft and full of regret. "I…I…" He sighed heavily.

Edward pulled me closer to his side; the touch of my hand in his did little to ease the conflict radiating from him.

"I don't even know where to start," Kieran said, scrubbing the back of his neck nervously. "I've done so many things, some I'm not proud of and some I'd do again in an instant."

I wondered which was which and whether he really knew what he'd done to hurt Edward and me. But as angry as I was to him for the pain he'd inflicted, I owed him 'Thanks' for giving me somewhere to recover from heartbreak and rediscover myself after Edward left, even though it may not have been his original intention. He'd given me a place where I could relive Edward's love for me.

Kieran had hurt me and intentionally bewildered me, but he'd also saved me.

"Why are you still here?" I asked.

I had no doubt he'd had multiple opportunities to flee. I wondered why he'd risked his life and stayed. There was so much I didn't know about what took place while I was unconscious.

A look of hurt that crossed Kieran's features for just a microsecond. He opened his mouth to respond, but I held up my hand to silence him. I wanted answers, but I wanted them from Edward first and foremost.

My throat began to burn with a renewed vigor and the precious few seconds since hunting had first been mentioned suddenly felt like an eternity. Edward seemed to sense on my discomfort and he squeezed my hand.

"You need to hunt, love. We can deal with everything else afterward."

Kieran stepped to the side and allowed Edward and I to pass. An instant later we were at the back door and running into the forest. I could barely believe the speed I had at my disposal. I felt a smile creep across my face as I pushed myself to go even faster. I heard Edward's laughter beside me and turned to look at him. Unlike when I'd been trapped inside Kieran's fantasy of what my immortality might be like, this felt completely right. I felt like I had finally found my place in the world—side by side with Edward.

The sound of Edward's happiness echoed through the forest. I slowed my pace so I could watch him run, momentarily carefree. My thirst and all thoughts of hunting flew from my mind as I watched the muscles on his smooth arms flex and ripple beneath the soft fabric of his shirt. I stopped running completely and within seconds Edward had stopped too.

"Bella, is something wr—"

He wasn't even able to get the sentence out before I had thrown myself across the gap between us and met his lips. My arms wrapped around his shoulders and I pulled his body against mine. His hands were instantly on my hips pulling my body even closer to his. Our tongues dueled for dominance in a kiss that was mind-blowingly different from any that we'd shared while I was still human. He used every part of his mouth to explore every part of mine. His lips melded against mine in ways that were unfamiliar but wonderful. It was an extension of our first kiss once I'd woken, deeper and completely unreserved. There was nothing he was holding back any more.

He moaned with pleasure and his hand began to rub gently from my waist down to my thigh, each pass seemed to generate greater desire in my body.

"Oh, Edward," I murmured into his ear after breaking the kiss to taste his jaw and throat.

His hand followed the same trail again, only when he reached my thigh, he lifted my leg and wrapped it around his waist. The change in position left his body pressing against mine with just the perfect amount of friction. I grabbed his other hand and guided it to my breast. Without hesitation his fingers began to explore the curves of my new body.

My hips bucked against his unashamedly as I caught his lips again. I went to push his shirt open just a little more but the fabric tore apart in my hands. I stopped kissing him for a moment, aghast at what I'd done, but when I met his eyes they contained such lust I couldn't stop myself from attacking him again.

He fingered the hem of the dress I'd been dressed into, pulling it off over my head in one swift move. The dress fell to the forest floor and Edward stood still for a moment, his eyes blazing a trail across my body. He traced one hand across my cheek, allowing it to follow the path of his eyes; along my throat and over my collarbone.

"So beautiful," he murmured reverently.

I reached for him, pulling his lips back to mine. His words inspired emotions deeper than anything I'd ever experienced before. My fingertips traced over the hard planes of his chest, his skin supple beneath their caress. I wanted to touch every inch of his skin, to kiss every part of his body. My mind and body reveled in the sensations felt by my newly enhanced senses.

I lifted my lips from Edward's long enough to ask, "Is this how you always feel?"

He chuckled. "Only when I'm with you, my love."

Instead of renewing our kiss, he bent to kiss my throat and neck. His lips travelled across my body, dropping lower with each pass. First his tongue grazed my collarbone and then, moments later, it caressed one of my nipples. His fleeting, gentle practice while I was still human was nothing compared to how the urgency he seemed to touch me with now. I kept waiting for the moment that he would pull back and say we should stop; instead he seemed to press on more desperately. There was something almost animalistic in his touch, as if he'd unleashed parts of himself that he'd previously restrained. I wondered at just how careful he'd had to be all the time and how much he'd had to hold back. The love I felt for him, which I already thought was more than enough to overwhelm me, swelled until I could practically feel it radiating from me.

As if he could sense the way I felt, Edward's touch grew more intimate. He helped me gently to the ground before pressing his body over mine. He brushed a stray hair from my face and kissed me sweetly while his other hand explored my stomach and dropped ever lower. He looked at me seeking approval and I responded with a small nod.

He kissed me again; his tongue exploring and tasting. His fingers brushed against me once before he slowly pressed one inside. I gasped at the unexpected feeling of another's touch—a shadow memory from my fantasy world—but this was so much better than what my mind had dreamed up.

I spread my legs wider to give Edward more access, feeling both wanted and wanton. A second finger curled inside me with the first and I felt like I was going to burst with the sheer intensity of feelings racing around my hypersensitive body.

I mumbled Edward's name as he slid his fingers inside me at a pace that seemed to speed with each second that passed. I wasn't sure how long I would last before I exploded into a thousand pieces of pure bliss. Before I could reach Nirvana, Edward whispered in my ear, "I want you."

I knew what he was asking, and what he was offering, and I knew it wasn't being given lightly. I wanted him so desperately, so urgently all I could do was nod. In the next second we were both completely undressed and I could feel Edward pressing against me, taking a second to relish in the moment before everything changed for both of us. I cried out in relief when he pushed himself into me, filling me so completely, so perfectly that I wished we could spend eternity in that moment.

I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist, barely giving him enough room to maneuver. I needed to feel him, to touch him, so badly. I reached around his back and pulled his head toward mine until our foreheads met. He smiled as he met my eyes.

"Hello, beautiful," he breathed as he thrust into me again.

I tilted my head back as a wave of pleasure rolled through me. When I met his eyes again, I smiled in return. "I love you."

He pressed a soft kiss to my lips. "And I, you."

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Our time on the forest floor was over all too soon. Almost as soon as I experienced the pure bliss of vampire love, the pain in my throat flared and reminded me of the real reason we'd left his family. Edward waited while I dressed before guiding me toward my first hunt.

The blood from the deer I'd drained hadn't even reached my stomach before the sight of Edward stalking his prey shirtless, with his pants hanging loosely from his hips because of the missing buttons, gave me a new, desperate need to have him.

In less than a second, I had knocked him off his feet and had him pressed against a tree. I kissed him hard, pouring every ounce of desire I felt straight back into him. I hitched my legs around his waist and he easily held me in place. Without breaking the kiss, I slipped one hand between our bodies and pushed his loose pants to the ground. In the same move, I guided him back inside me.

He guided my hips over his again and again. To enhance the feeling of his rough, desperate movements, I held onto his shoulders and leaned my head back. He used the space between our bodies to bring his lips to my chest, kissing and gently nibbling on my sensitive skin. It wasn't long before my world exploded with ecstasy again. Still supporting me, Edward sunk to the forest floor, to rest below the tree that we'd been leaning against.

"Am I ever going to stop needing you this much?" I asked.

Edward's lips caressed my throat as he breathed, "I hope not."

I placed my hands on his cheeks and guided his lips back to mine. He moaned as I shifted against his chest.

"Me either."

I couldn't believe how happy I was, the pain and heartache I'd experienced, as a human, seemed to fade into the background—only able to be recalled with the greatest concentration. I spent a moment trying to remember my life in the weeks leading up to Victoria's attack. I turned my mind onto the pain I'd been in, then on the confusion I'd felt.

"I wish I knew what you were thinking," Edward murmured, touching his fingertips to my temples.

"You don't know?" I asked.

He'd seemed so in tune with my every need since waking, I'd assumed that whatever had caused my mind to be silent to him had corrected itself during my change.

He smiled, utterly carefree for the moment. "Unfortunately not, I'd thought maybe—"

I cut him off with a laugh. "Me too."

"Now who can read thoughts?" Edward teased.

I leaned against his bare chest. "I was just thinking how different everything is now."

He wrapped his arms around me, holding me securely. "Not everything."

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A/N:- As I said to the ever-lovely Boydblog when I sent her this chapter to beta, please don't die of shock. I know it's been a long time—too long—but unfortunately that's the way life is sometimes. Thank you to everyone who is still with me, I appreciate the effort it can sometimes take to find time in your day to read & review so thank you.

There is more to come, hopefully soon if my mojo holds—if not I apologise in advance for any delays.