To Embrace Not What I Am, But What They Wished Me to Be

Irelia awoke to the sight of an unfamiliar roof. She couldn't move. Something was restraining her. Blinking her eyes, lifted her head and stared down at her own body. Saying she was surprised with what she found would have been an understatement. Her entire form was strapped down and secured to the hospital bed she was laying on. Dropping her head back to her pillow, Irelia let out a slow sigh.

"It's a dream. Wake up, Irelia. Wake. Up." Irelia told herself.

Opening her eyes and looking down once again, she found herself staring at the exact same situation. She wasn't dreaming at all. This was reality.

"Grrmmph!" Irelia grunted immediately, straining against her bonds and trying to force her way to freedom. None of her limbs budged; the entirety of her body was securely fastened to the bed. It was as if she was a patient in an insane asylum, tied down so she couldn't harm anyone... or perhaps harm herself.

Yet, Irelia was a stubborn person. She didn't know when to give up and quite frankly, giving up wasn't in her nature. And so she struggled, and struggled, and struggled until her efforts were at the point of causing the entire hospital bed to rock about uncontrollably as she tried to fight her way free.

"GRRRRAAAAH! OUT! LET ME OUT!" Irelia yelled in an arbitrary outburst. The warrior continued slamming about in futile attempt to escape until she finally laid still.

"Fuck..." Irelia thought to herself, her breathing ragged and panting with the unnecessary strains she was taking. "God dammit... Syndra... I can't... NO FUCK THIS!"

"LET ME OUT GOD DAMN!" Irelia screamed a second time, on the verge of breaking down as she realized how helpless she was in this situation. The warrior poured an inhuman amount of strength in fighting against her bonds until a popping sound of tearing fibers reached her ears.

"No! I'm not powerless. This is my will! I shall not falter!" Irelia told herself.

At last, her efforts rewarded her. The click and squeak of an opening door finally drew the Ionian's attention to the door off to her right. Finally relaxing and falling back down to the bed, Irelia glanced at the door. Much to her relief, a familiar form entered the room.

"Soraka?" Irelia questioned, craning her neck to get a better view of the healer, "Soraka why am I tied up to a bed like this!? What's going on!? Let me out!"

Despite Irelia's protests, Soraka moved about the room as if Irelia hadn't even said a single word.

"Soraka! Why are you-"

"This is for your own safety." Soraka interrupted in a cold voice.

"For my own safety?" Irelia repeated incredulously, "How is this for my own safety!? I have to be out there! I need to make sure Syndra still isn't-"

"She has brought nothing but ill to you, Irelia." Soraka interrupted with firm resolution.

"But it wasn't her! It was-"

"Irelia! You struck at your own people!" Soraka almost cried back, "Your own people! People that you protected for over two decades! Do you know what's going on out there!? Half the population thinks you've gone rogue! They think you're a traitor! They want your head!"

Irelia blinked with stunned surprise as she listened to Soraka's words. Ionia was having riots because of her?

"B-But I-"

"You did, Irelia. You did. I know better than a lot of people what happens to you when you're angry. But really Irelia... what has gotten into you? It's like you're being controlled, it's like you're not yourself anymore!"

Before Irelia could voice her answer, the hospital room door opened and two more individuals entered the room. Craning her head yet again, the warrior's eyes settled on two familiar faced; Karma and Elder Kwan.

"Karma! Please let me out of here!" Irelia immediately cried out, desperately begging for assistance while simultaneously forgetting to refute Soraka's arguments.

Karma's response, however, was the complete opposite of what Irelia expected.

"I cannot do that, Irelia." Karma answered in a firm, immovable tone.

"... I... But... What?!" Irelia sputtered in absolute shock.

"I said I cannot do that." Karma repeated, "Your actions have caused an upheaval in the balance of Ionia. We must keep you here not only for your protection, but also for the protection of our country."

"But what about... What about what you told me? This is my path!" Irelia cried out, almost wounded with the fact that Karma was going back on her words.

"I can always protect Ionia. But I'm the only one who can protect Syndra too! She isn't a bad person! She's just hurt and scared and... and..."

"That's enough, Irelia." Elder Kwan finally spoke up, "We cannot allow you to pursue this desire. It is not only destroying you, but destroying many lives along with it. Your path should not require the deaths of your people."

Irelia stared in stunned silence as Elder Kwan also spoke up against her actions. The warrior knew of her crimes and her guilt, but she couldn't bring herself to focus on that just yet.

"... But... But... No... Not you too...!" Irelia whispered, her eyes widening as her friends and colleagues abandoned her one at a time.

"This is for your own protection, Irelia." Elder Kwan replied in a jarringly harsh voice.

"THEN WHO WILL PROTECT HER!?" Irelia almost shouted, "WHO WILL PROTECT SYNDRA!? I'm the-"

"The sovereign is one that is not worthy of your protection. I was wrong about her." Elder Kwan interrupted in a deathly cold voice.

For a few seconds, silence dominated the air between them. Irelia was completely stunned by the elder's words.

"... No... You don't mean that... You can't mean that..." Irelia whispered.

With that, Elder Kwan swept away with a flourish of his robes. He gave a curt nod to Karma and Soraka before he left. Karma too, followed after the elder after a few more seconds of gazing at Irelia's stunned face. Yet, Irelia was almost blind to their disappearance. Her mind was fraught with a nightmare of panic, desperation as she believed her only true supporters and believes had turned against her.

"Out... Escape... I have to escape... I have to save her!" Irelia thought to herself. "It's just me now. I'm alone. Only I can help her..."

The reality, however... Was the complete opposite...

Outside Irelia's Room

Elder Kwan let out an extremely heavy breath the moment the door to Irelia's room clicked shut behind him. The words he had spoken had left a bitter taste in his mouth. He was never a man to spout such lies. Yet, he was left with little choice. There was a plan, and he was a part of it...

Moments later, Karma emerged from the room and greeted him with a swift nod. The pair promptly began making their way down one of the various hallways of the Placidium Hospital before Elder Kwan finally spoke up in a hushed tone.

"Was I too harsh...?" The elder whispered, visibly pained by the fact that he had said such things.

"No." Karma replied with a single word.

"Was I too soft?" Elder Kwan inquired, this time his tone lighter.

"No." Karma repeated, this time with a small, almost sad chuckle.

A moment of silence passed between the elders before Elder Kwan spoke up once more with his hushed whisper.

"Are you sure about this? Can we trust her?"

"The words the sovereign spoke... Were not words that came from the mind. Those were words from the heart... True will... True love... It does not lie."

"Then I can only pray that she knows what it is she is doing..."

Hours Later

"...And so it has been concluded that the Will of the Blades is finally free of the corruption that the Dark Sovereign tainted her mind with. However, as her condition is still stabilizing, we will be moving her to protective confinement for both hers and our own protection. Thank you..."

With his address to the Ionian public complete, Elder Kwan swept off once more in the direction of the Placidium hospital. Behind him, the crowd roared to life. His words had placated many, but there were still some that remained furious; livid and retributive towards the bloody actions Irelia herself had taken against her own people.

"She's a traitor! A traitor! We demand justice..." A voice yelled from within the crowd. The rest of the voice was drowned out as other Ionians proceeded to argue with the speaker, some against her, others with her.

None the less, the crowd's angry arguments dulled to a dull roar as the Placidium hospital doors shut behind Elder Kwan. Again, the elder took a deep breath and steeled his nerves. Unfortunately, all the steeling of nerves in the world would never be enough to prepare him to lie to the captain of the guard. As the elder pushed into Irelia's room, he found Karma and Soraka already awaiting his arrival.

"How did they take it?" Karma inquired in a hushed voice as Elder Kwan entered.

The elder sighed and shook his head with uncharacteristic worry and agitation written all across his face. Turning to Irelia, who was facing entirely away from them, the elder spoke up.

"We will now... relocate you to... protective confinement for your own safety." The elder stated in a soft tone.

Irelia answered with a mildly disdainful sniff before finally speaking.

"Where's my sword." Irelia inquired in an incredibly blunt tone.

Elder Kwan flinched slightly at Irelia's tone before glancing at Karma.

"Your blades were temporarily sealed until we could verify that you were yourself once more." Karma replied in a low tone.

"I am myself. I have always been myself." Irelia stated through gritted teeth.

"That is for us to decide." Elder Kwan butted in before Irelia could continue. "Come. We have not a moment to waste."

With that, the elder motioned towards the small squad of guards that were assigned to escort them. The men started forward and undid the straps holding Irelia to the bed before attempting to help her back to her feet. Angry and indignant, the Will of the Blades brushed aside their help and pushed herself up on her own.

"We will be on our way then." Elder Kwan stated, taking a suspiciously pointed nod at Karma.

Without a word, the Enlightened One nodded back before bowing slightly to Irelia and pushing out of the room. Minutes later, the entourage with Elder Kwan and Irelia followed suit.

It wasn't until Irelia herself saw the chaos that Ionia was in that she realized how destructive her actions had been. As the group marched towards the capital building, Irelia could only bow her head and avoid looking directly into the eyes of the people that now surrounded her. It was only her and her actions that had taken the lives of her fellow Ionians. Guilt bore down upon her like an unending burden. The lives she had taken flashed before her eyes and the burdens she bore only grew with each passing step. Irelia remained lost in her thoughts until a single object snapped her out of her trance.

As the group marched through the sea of Ionians crowded in front of the Placidium Hospital, a lone tomato landed with a disgusting splat on the ground just beside Irelia's foot; it's juices splattering all over one of Irelia's boots. Halting abruptly, Irelia raised her head and stared into the face of the one woman who had thrown the item. She was an aging woman, well into the ripeness of her life. Her eyes were red and puffy after what was clearly days of crying and mourning.

"I... I will have my justice!" The woman demanded, her voice quavering both out of fear and anger, "You... You took my son! You killed him! You... You're a traitor!"

A dead silence ruled over the entire crowd as everyone waited for Irelia's response. When she said nothing, someone else in the crowd shouted out.

"SHE'S INNOCENT! IT'S THE DARK SOVEREIGN'S DOING!"

The crowd began to grow restless as they returned to the angry debate they were previously engrossed in

"NO, SHE'S GUILTY!"

"INNOCENT!"

"GUILTY!"

The rest of the argument became a droning din as the entire populace resumed their violent argument. Things continued to escalate uncontrollably after that. Before Irelia even knew what was going on, the guards surrounding her and Elder Kwan had all disappeared. They had been overwhelmed by the masses of Ionians attempting to reach the Will of the Blades. At first, Irelia backed away, attempting to escape their grasp, but there was no path. She was surrounded on all sides. Before she could even cry out in defiance, she felt herself get pulled across into the crowd, her body being dragged like a rope as people fought to protect her while others fought to extract their revenge on her. In the distance, Irelia thought she heard Elder Kwan roar in attempt to quell the chaos, but his voice was drowned out amongst the noise of the uncontrollable crowd.

Just as Irelia's patience neared its limits, another shocking event occurred. All of the lights in the area cut out. But that was hardly the end of the surprises. Instead, a disturbingly familiar and loathing face lit up in the sky. While the lights were out, the Placidium PA system had been activated. For a moment, the tugging and fighting stopped, all eyes turning skyward to see the one thing that was projected into the sky.

Syndra.

Somewhere behind her, Irelia heard a sigh of relief. Though she ignored it at the time, if she had turned to see who had uttered the sigh, she would have found Elder Kwan clutching his chest in relief. Karma had successfully activated the public announcement system just in time before the crowd could get too out of control.

Everything was going according to their plan.

"Greetings... Fools." Syndra's holographically projected head spoke in a horrible sounding sneer. "It seems that you balance obsessed freaks continue to live to this day... But that... is an issue for another day. Right now... You are in possession of something that is mine. And I want that something back. The Will of the Blades."

At once, the captivated audience heaved a collective gasp.

"Though she is certainly not to be the last, she is the first to have been subjugated to my will. She does as I command and I control her. She is my ultimate creation, and I will have her returned to me..."

Syndra paused for a moment to allow her demands to sink in.

"Perhaps you think I am bluffing... Perhaps you think that I am not serious... But I urge you to think again."

Moving to the side, Syndra backed away from her camera and turned the device such that it captured both of her hostage elders in its view.

"Do you recognize these two people?" Syndra laughed maniacally, "Here, let me give you a closer look..."

Gesturing at Elder Korell, Syndra dragged the Elder in front of the camera before forcing his face into the camera.

"Do you recognize this one? Yes. She is an elder. She is my hostage."

Turning to the elder, Syndra squeezed her with her magic.

"State your name, pig." Syndra snarled.

"Korell... Elder Korell... Fifth elder of the Ionian council of elders..." She managed to wheeze before Syndra released her.

"Good... Good... You have my thanks, Elder." The sovereign cooed sadistically.

"There you have it." Syndra stated gleefully, "I have two elders hostage now... And now... I have one!"

Without an ounce of hesitation, Syndra turned and beheaded Elder Korell with a single sphere. The ball of black magic balanced perfectly atop the Elder's neck, where her head was a few seconds ago.

Instantly, gasps and screams of absolute horror exploded from the crowd gathered at the Placidium as they watched one of their beloved elders depart their world.

"I still have one of your foolish elders left!" Syndra snarled viciously into the camera, "RETURN THE WILL OF THE BLADES TO ME AT ONCE OR HIS FATE SHALL BE THE SAME AS KORELL'S. LOOK TO THE EAST, PIGS, WATCH AS MY CASTLE APPROACHES. YOU HAVE BUT ONE DAY TO MEET MY CONDITIONS. AFTER ONE DAY, THIS CASTLE WILL FALL UPON YOUR PRECIOUS PLACIDIUM! I AM THE DARK SOVEREIGN. I HAVE SPOKEN."

With that, Syndra immediately killed the feed, leaving the entire Placidium to what she hoped would be chaos... And then finally, order and unification.

However, unlike what Syndra was expecting, there was absolutely no chaos at the Placidium. There was the exact opposite. Order.

Abruptly, Irelia felt the hands tugging on her limbs vanish one by one until she was helped back to her feet by an unseen individual. Still shocked and stunned with what had just happened, Irelia glanced about her before her eyes fixated on Elder Kwan. The elder, however, didn't return her gaze. Instead, he spoke up in a powerful tone.

"Ionia... Does not bow to the evil!" Elder Kwan spoke up in a powerful voice.

Silence...

"Never surrender!" Another voice suddenly sounded from the depths of the crowd.

"We'll never hand her over!" Another voice added.

"Defend her! PROTECT THE CAPTAIN TO THE VERY LAST!"

Pretty soon, the entire crowd was cheering and rallying behind Irelia. Not a single soul even thought about the revenge that previously tainted their minds. All of them stood firm and resolute in their defense of their beloved captain of the guard.

Unfortunately, Irelia could only find the opposite. She was absolutely despondent.

"No... Syndra... what have you done..." Irelia thought to herself. Even as the thought passed through her mind, however, she already began to understand what the sovereign was doing. Only she didn't want to believe it. None the less, everything was lining up. Elder Kwan and Karma's sudden hostility towards her... The seemingly perfect timing between her getting caught and mauled by the crowd of Ionians and then Syndra's timely interruption.

It was a plan. She had been fooled all along. She had to stop this before the damage became irreversible.

"NO! WAIT I-"

Before Irelia could even get another word out of her mouth, a sharp sting pierced her back. Instantly, she felt a disturbingly familiar sensation of numbness overwhelm her body as another sedative was injected into her. Staggering, Irelia managed to turn and find Soraka standing behind her, a now empty syringe in her hand. Still, the warrior clung to her consciousness as her strength evaporated.

"N...N... n..no..." Irelia gasped before her eyes fluttered shut and she collapsed into the healers arms.

Author's Notes:

So what kind of excuse can I cook up for these weeks of delays? Well midterms and labs... Real life sure gets in the way a lot. None the less, here we are. Where the story goes from here should be fairly well laid out for everyone to see. Still, please do refrain from spoiling things should you "know" how this is going to end.

I suppose I feel alright with this chapter. Realistically, however, if my writing is sub par, flame me for it so I can fix it. I've been out of the loop for around three weeks and I can definitely feel that disconnect after not having written for so long.

One chapter and a very lengthy epilogue left for this story. Brace yourselves, the next chapter is going to be an emotional one. I hope to see you all there. As always, thank you for your continued support and I hope to see you in the chapters to come. Should you have any comments or criticism for me, please don't hesitate to share them.