AuthorsNote: You guys, i seriously love you all so much. thanksss a bunch for all the awesome reveiws(: they really do make me soooooooo i am so grateful; i stayed up allll night, waited for my mom to go to sleep so that i could write this chapter. my writers block was unbeatable, and i honestly didnt think i was gonnnna make this out. but! 4 hours;7 itunes playlists;& 2 pots of coffee later, i finished! its 5 in the morning and i have to go get ready for the grueling school day ahead of me.
im on no sleep;NO SLEEP.
but you people are pretty worth it (:
enjoy.
Chapter15
(Renesmee)
"I'll be waiting." I whispered. The steam of his breath against mine sent shivers up my spine. The look in his eyes, his concern for Seth, sent them back down again.
I turned around with my hands covering my face after Jacob had sprung up the stairs after Carlisle.
His warm lips hadn't helped rid of the blush pooling under my cheek, and I knew that Jasper would be waiting the second I turned around with some sort of joke about my sun kissed cheeks, his eyes would be lit with same awkwardness that plundered my own complexion.
"Oh, young love." Jasper whispered, flicking off the TV and turning to face me. His blue jeans were bunched around the bare of his ankles. His toenails were perfectly sculpted and filed, something I always noticed about him. Expertly toned arms cradled his head as he sat, his eyes jeering, waiting for whatever I was going to say next.
I smiled, stupidly. My lips stretching tighter as the seconds wore on. When I tried to say something the grin would take my words.
"Are you in love, Nessie? Is our little Loch Ness in love?"
I took this question seriously, I wasn't quite sure I knew why. The smile on my face faltered, but still never left my eyes while I looked to Jasper.
"I am."
The door shot open and I hid my head in the nearest pillow while Daddy and Alice walked in. From the ecstatic look on my favorite pixie's face, she had obviously heard the entire conversation.
"I knew it." She squealed, curling into Jaspers lap and planting the quick, but passionate kiss he had been waiting for since before she walked in the door. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer. I ached for Jacob.
Daddy, clad with that award winning smile, made his was to that beloved piano of his and began playing my lullaby, ending that conversation. He winked when I gave him an appreciative smile.
I wasn't sure why I was so embarrassed, apparently I took after my mother when it came to that.
If I was proud of anything, it was Jacob. I didn't think that I had to admit that I was in love with him. I thought that it was just assumed, like a fundamental force of nature.
I turned to Alice, planning on asking her about our hunting trip this weekend. Her eyes were a million miles, a vision.
In the corner of the room, the pianos harsh, lowest octave crashed through my ear drums. My hands shot to cover my ears. My father's tortured grunt penetrated the reverberation of the pianos groan while he stormed out of the room. Out the bay window, I saw his blurred figure dart into the trees.
I turned to Alice, my eyes bent with the confusion of what just happened. Jasper lifted Alice off his lap, and went in the woods after his brother.
My Aunt whipped her tiny little head back and forth, her lips pulled to a smirk.
"Alice! What did you see? What's wrong with them?"
She crossed the room at lightning speed, throwing herself onto the couch next to me.
"It was you and Jacob."
My eyebrows crossed to a skeptical line.
"Yeah?"
"Your first time."
Her giggles shook with no bounds, symphonious bells of mirth. I groaned.
"Dad saw it?"
She nodded with a smile.
"Yup. But only the foreplay, don't worry."
I feel back, then sideways, laying my head in her lap, looking to her face.
"That's so gross."
"I wouldn't say that."
Her tiny fingers began to braid my hair.
"Should I go talk to him, Alice? I can't even imagine what he is thinking."
"Hold that thought. Let me check." Her eyes faded to the future, while her fingers were still much in the present, working their magic on my hair while she wove a tight-but therapeutic-French braid. While she was away I focused on the calming pattern of the way she entwined and tucked my long strands, attempting to get my mind off my poor Daddy, the image of my foreplay etched into his brain forever.
With that, Alice was back.
"No, no, no. The last thing he wants is the sex talk from you right now." She secured the end of the first braid with a rubber band that seemed to appear from out of nowhere, and then rounded on the second. I had nothing to say.
"You don't seem very surprised about it." She said, dubiously.
"About what?"
She let out a rush of cold air. "About this, you and Jake. You're first time."
"Can't say that I am. I knew it was going to happen soon. I know that he wants to. He's waited long enough. And I don't think I would really mind it either."
I opened my eyes to hers after she didn't answer.
"Is that bad of me to consider?"
"Not at all Nessie. It's perfectly natural. I just don't want you to do something your not comfortable with. You are only 7 years old. Don't forget that."
I chuckled, this was unexpected. I thought that when this talk came around Alice, court jester of kink, would be providing me with every tip in the book, every piece of information I would need for a thing like this.
"I'm 7 and nine months, Aunt Alice."
She giggled, those bells returning to her fretful tone.
"That you are."
She kissed my forehead while she tied up the end of my second braid.
Right on cue.
Jake came stomping down the stairs, his eyes were full of some type of determination.
It couldn't be…? No. No way. I sat up, a smile on my face despite the hesitant balance of my thoughts. Im sure I would know what he was thinking soon enough, I always do.
"All done with Carlisle?" I asked, crossing the room to take his hand, already leading him out the door regardless of my question.
"Yup. Let's get out of here. I want to go up to the trails with you before I have to go meet Sam."
"Sounds perfect." I sighed, more than relieved to have some time alone with him for the day.
"Have fun you guys!" Emmet called out the window of his bedroom while we crossed over the driveway, leading us and our entangled hands to the sweet privacy of the forest.
Just before disappearing into the bush, I heard Alice's giggling voice far in the background of the rustling leaves and tweeting birds: "But not too much fun."
***
I outran Jasper to the cottage, slamming the front door to make my message more than clear. I sent a bodily message of thanks to my brother for his concern, but now was simply not the time.
I needed some alone time with my wife, to discuss what I just saw.
Jacob and my baby girl, entangled on the snowcapped peak of Forks highest mountain, the trees their only coverage, Jacob her only source of warmth. His lips were exploring her skin, her eyes closed, mouth open, uncertainty hidden behind her closed lids, experiencing a new type of love. Jacob was trembling, visibly nervous, trying not to overstep his boundaries, but obviously wanting to.
I rapped my head on the door after I closed it, trying to physically bang the image out of my head, praying to whatever god above that Alice wasn't right about this one.
That was my daughter that he was lusting after, my flesh and blood.
While I proceeded to hammer my head, slowly disassembling my beloved cottage, I thought of Charlie. I thought of what he must have been feeling the night of his daughters wedding. How helpless he must have thought, knowing that his daughters innocence was only hours from being lost.
I wondered if he approved of the physical feelings I had for Bella. I had the sudden, persistent urge to apologize to him for the discomfort that feeling must have caused.
I regretted the feelings I had that night for another mans daughter. That's something no father should have to think of, let alone witness.
I groaned: "Belllllllllllllla." My head swung around, my eyes to the floor; I saw the pair of feet that I had memorized so many times before and instinctively grabbed the miracle of her waist. My arms laced around the comfort I so desperately needed. My face rested in the warmth of her neck, planting kisses I hadn't revisited since yesterday.
"What's the matter, hubby?" She chuckled. "I see you were testing the structural standing of our cottage; not a very legitimate test, doing it with your head and all, but whatever."
"We need to talk." I groaned, still into her neck.
"Are you breaking up with me?"
At that, my head shot up, my eyes glaring into hers, not appreciating the sarcasm.
"Jacob Black is officially trying to seduce our daughter."
The humor in her eyes evaporated, as I predicated.
"Pardon?" She spat, pulling me to the couch. We sat facing one another, not touching, not cuddling, a seating arrangement that always meant nothing but the utmost of business.
"Alice had a vision, Bella." Idly, I shuddered at the memory.
"Of?" I shrank against the couch.
"Don't make me remember it again, love. Please. I can't handle it."
She leaned against me, silent.
"What do we do?" I pleaded. I was desperate for this not to happen. She was so young, so naïve, not remotely ready for such an emotional, such a passionate exchange of feelings.
"Im not sure, im as new to this as you are." She pulled my head to her chest and we lay together, like that, wrapped, for awhile; again, not caring how long.
"I shouldn't have allowed them…" I took back my words immediately, seeing the piercing look in my wife's eyes.
"We shouldn't have allowed them to get together so early. I knew this would happen. Why else would he want to be with her?"
She thought before speaking up again.
"He's been with her for eight months before even considering it. That's pretty impressive, he is a growing man."
"He's not a man, Bella."
She giggled. "Not yet,"
My scowl snapped the humor in her remark. She got serious again, respecting my concern.
"Joking, Edward, don't worry. I don't like this either."
"They should wait like we did. Wait until they are married." I said after awhile, breaking the comfortable, thoughtful silence that wrapped around us, almost as taut as our embrace itself.
She considered this. She considered this for a long time, until finally, thankfully stretching me into her minds graceful barrier and remembering for the both of us, my advice to her months before.
I saw myself in her mind, my words of wisdom: "Bella, I didn't think that it was possible for anybody to love another person as much as I love you." I paused, letting her brace herself, "But, my dear. That boy loves our Renesmee more than I thought possible. I understand his intentions, witch are nothing but the best for her, and I am confident that he would never do anything to harm her, or make her feel taken advantage of. He needs her to be happy almost as much as he needs himself to be happy. He feels horribly for having romantic feelings for her ahead of schedule, he wants her to have a childhood just as much as we do. He is being more careful with her than he needs, or wants to be, and if anybody knows this, it's me Bella. Do you honestly think I would have been okay with this if I knew it would bring them anything but joy? Or if I knew he wanted merely her body? He wants to be the one to make her happy. He doesn't want to have to lie to her. He wants to start their life together. I don't see anything wrong with his feelings."
I lifted my head, her arms still wrapped around my neck.
Her eyes were serious, and I practically melted into their golden glow. Her lips were calm while I kissed them, compliant, reassuring.
She spoke with a whisper. If human ears were as close as I was, they wouldn't have a chance at detecting her words.
"They will when their ready. They will know, just like we did."
She kissed my lips again before laying my head back to its original position of ease.
I saw into her thoughts once again, my own words echoing in the barriers of my own brain: "Bella, I know that you just want her to be okay, you want that as much as I do. But I also know that Jacob will do nothing but good things for her. She has never really been a child Bella, she is already grown up. It's not fair to withhold things from her that she would have wanted to know, she deserves nothing but the truth. Even as her parents, it's still not our decision who she spends her time with. But if it was, I couldn't pick a better person for her. He truly loves her Bella, with his whole heart."
Her previous whisper interrupted her memory.
"They will be ok, Edward. I promise you that with my whole heart."
We made love well into the night, exchanging words of devotion. We went slow, worshiping each others bodies with more love than we thought possible to muster.
"Oh, how I love you Isabella. Oh, how you've saved me."
***
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