AuthorsNote: I am SO sorry this took so long. I hope you enjoy it, I re-wrote it 3 times. Review, tell me your still into this story. Enjoy :)
Chapter19
(Jacob)
We were all joined in the dining room, the entire family. Nessie was at my side, her hands joined with mine under cover of the table. The small bottle in the middle of the table drew all our eyes like gravity. I looked to Carlisle, deciding to break the barrier of silence that built up over time.
Emmet beat me to it.
"When do we go?"
Carlisle considered this, the intricate wheels and pulleys that filled his brain working wonders behind steady eyes.
"Tonight; When he is changed, when his hormones are heightened."
Edward interjected.
"Shouldn't we wait for a full moon; the Cortisol will be peaked because of the changed. Serotonin will be almost 30% of his overall blood volume; it will make results of the enkephalin more concentrated if it hits the chemicals directly."
I think we all sometimes forgot about Edward's many medical degrees.
"True, but; the full moon makes Seth more ravenous due to the peak in his hormones. If we are being honest with ourselves, Seth is stronger. And will be a lot stronger during a full moon. I'm not willing to deal with the consequences of an accident."
Emmet spoke up again, this time, a little more lighthearted.
"Is this going to be like, a sneak attack? Or is he going to be okay with us sticking a needle in his arm?"
"No, no, no. If we even get too close without him being restrained he will just run. When he is changed, he will always feel as if his territory is being subjected. I'm not even sure how we are going to get hold of him long enough to administer the injection."
Bella looked up to Carlisle, signaling an idea.
"Why don't you just restrain him before he's changed? That way you could maybe even get him to agree to you giving him the injection."
This was the point where I tried to avert my eyes. Edward turned to her, a smile bright in his eyes. And she would give that smirk where you knew that if she could, she would be blushing. He grabbed her hand and twined their fingers on top of the table, keeping eye contact while he kissed her on the nose.
I didn't even want to know the silent conversation they were probably having.
I decided it was time to secure my place among the party.
"I'll need to be there." I said, confident. "I don't think that Seth would be okay with this if I wasn't."
When I looked around the table, I wasn't sure what it was that made me so uneasy. Their faces were blank, every pair of metallic eyes doing everything in their power to avoid contact with mine, wide and serious.
She spoke then, her words rushed; frantic.
"No. You're not going. It's too dangerous."
I looked to her, the way she sat on the edge of her seat, the way her fingers clamped tightly now around mine. Her face was white. Goosebumps patterned across her arms.
"Ness,"
"No. You can't. He will change you. He's stronger, Jake. "
"We can talk about this later."
She turned more toward me, closer.
"Or, we can talk about it now."
This conversation now was hopeless. I turned to Carlisle; his face was turned to the table, trying to respect our privacy, something Nessie didn't value.
"I'm his brother, his best friend. I promised I would help him."
Anxiety began to bubble within me. There was no way I could be stopped from being there while this was happening. I needed to be there for Seth. He needed me. He needed me more than anybody at this point.
"I agree,"
Nessie heaved, cutting of Carlisle, who waited patiently to continue. Edward shot her his warning eyes.
"I think Jacob should be there Ness; but only for the restraint, not the actual injection. He can leave before Seth even changes."
She pulled her hands from mine, and stomped from the dining room up the stairs.
I got up to follow, until I felt a cool hand on my shoulder.
"She's only worried. Don't fight with her, please."
It was Esme, calm, as she always was. She radiated that onto me, and I knew too that fighting with Renesmee was not the solution.
"Promise." I gave her a smirk, and walked the stairs to her balcony, to where I knew she would be waiting to ignore my reassurance.
***
I felt warm arms embrace me from behind. They twined tight around my waist and I closed my eyes, savoring the kisses he was planting on my neck. My breathing peaked and he laughed hot exhales through my hair while he pushed it aside. I starred to the setting sun, the way its rays shadowed the greens in the forest. I watched a deer sprint along its boundaries and I longed to stretch my legs, to run along with the deer, to get rid of this knot in the pit of my stomach. His kisses nibbled along my ear, and I spoke.
"They can handle this without you."
"I know they can, but I am going to be there for Seth while they do."
I turned, and his arms held me tighter. His eyes were so calm, and I couldn't even stand to look at them. I wouldn't let him convince me that this was okay, because it wasn't.
"It amazes me after all we have been through to get here, to get this," I showed him that I was referring to the way his arms were around me, the way I hung on his neck with mine with soft kisses on his arms, across his chest.
"It amazes me that you are so willing to risk it."
The only sounds I would hear for the next, the longest 30 seconds of my life would be of the deer that still pranced along the trees. Its carefree footwork marked the seconds I waited for his reply. The rustle of the bushes was the only noise while his face dropped, while his mouth stammered for a reply.
"Jacob, you being there while Seth is violent; while he doesn't care what he's doing or who he's is doing it to, is a massive possibility that this will be lost. Bottom line; he is stronger than you, you are not safe from his bites, and you are not going."
The vibrations of his laughter pulled our embrace apart. I starred, watching the wrinkles of his eyes, the whites of his teeth. I rolled my eyes while his chuckles sunk deeper to his chest. His hands wrapped around my face while he kissed me, still laughing against my still lips.
"Look at you. Look at my girl, all serious. You're not going she says. You're not the hardass you think you are; your way to adorable for that, dimples."
This time while he kissed me, he pinched my cheeks, pulling me in closer; and this time, I kissed back. It still made me weak in the knees, how when our mouths would mold together, hot and cold would blend. He pulled away, hands still on my face.
"I am going, because I am going to be there for Seth. I promise you with everything I have that I will come back to you in one piece. If things get out of hand, I will go. Promise."
He kissed me again. My thoughts were jumbled, a mixture of admiration, overpowered by anxiety. The feeling was spreading through me. Every word out of his mouth convincing me more to let him go, to let him risk the last ounce of humanity supposedly he held dear.
"Of course, my bloodthirsty goddess, considering that you are the object of my imprintation, and by extension, my everlasting devotion, you also are the ruler of my body and mind. If you tell me that I simply cannot go, I simply will not be able to. But I know that you love me enough to understand why I have to be there, and why you need to let me do this."
***
That night when they headed out, I watched him go, waving while he ran to catch up with the rest of them. I watched the other half of me sprinting into the woods with a smile on his face while he risked both of our lives.