Chapter 57: We Will Get There

"How do I tell the children?" Elaine spoke softly from her dressing table. She didn't want to leave her son alone, but it was custom for a knight to stand over the body of a member of the royal family. Sir Pellinore was guarding the body of Prince Owain. He was the first to offer. Arthur had been sent for. She needed her cousin there but she would not admit it. Gwaine had sent the message to the King of the Camelot.

"We'll do it together." He stood behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

She nodded slowly as she pulled her pins from her hair. It had only been a mere hours since the death of their son, but Elaine looked exhausted. "We will tell them in the morning." She shrugged his hands off her shoulders and stood up. "Get some sleep." She walked out of the chambers without another word. Gwaine watched her leave. He knew exactly where she was going. She was going to their son. As much as he wanted to go to him, it broke Gwaine's heart to see the small body of his son. Yes, Owain was fragile but he was a beautiful boy and he meant the world to Gwaine.

Arthur rode alone with Lancelot and Percival. As soon as he received the message of his godson's death, he saddled his horse and gave orders to Gwen to travel with the rest of the knights. Arthur knew he had to be with his cousin. She was bound to be hurting. They only stopped to water the horses but no longer.

"Arthur, you need to rest." Lancelot insisted to his King.

"No. We're close to Corbenic. Elaine needs me." He kicked his horse again as they rounded the road, which led to the castle. Flags flew at half mast and there was no one in the streets of the town. The whole kingdom was in mourning. When he rode into the courtyard, he was greeted only by Gwaine. The blonde King dismounted and strode up to Gwaine. "Gwaine." The two met in a brotherly hug. "I am so sorry. How are you?"

"Coping." He looked up at the castle as the two walked inside. "It's Elaine I'm worried about. It's been two days and she hasn't slept in our bed. I don't think she eats very much. I spend all my time between Galahad and Anne. Galahad is still ill but he is recovering."

"Have they been told?" He asked as they walked into Elaine's study, which was empty.

"Yes. Elaine and I told them yesterday." He sighed heavily and sat down in front of the fire. "Anne doesn't fully understand. She is asking where is Owain?" Gwaine broke down; he buried his face in his hands and sobbed. "How can I fully explain to my daughter that her brother is never coming back? How?"

Arthur pulled a stool alongside his friend and grasped his hands. "Gwaine. I know you are hurting." Holding his hands tightly and pulling them away from Gwaine's face. "I'm here for you both."

Gwaine nodded. "It wasn't meant to happen. Why did it happen to him? My boy." He took deep breaths and got to his feet. "Could you try and talk to Elaine? I've tried but nothing seems to be getting to her. It's like she's locked herself away in her mind."

"I will." Arthur nodded and stood up, placing a strong hand on Gwaine's shoulder. "You need to eat and rest."

He nodded and allowed Arthur lead him out of the Queen's study. "Thank you for being here. Is Gwen coming?"

"Yes. She should be arriving tomorrow." Arthur put an arm around Gwaine's shoulder. The two men walked trough the castle, in search of the Queen.

The late Prince was buried in a quiet ceremony in the royal family tomb. Galahad and Anne were not present as Elaine insisted upon it. She was still quiet and withdrawn. She barely spoke. The only people she spoke to; were her children and to any servants, when she gave orders to them. She did not say much to Arthur. She greeted him and that was the most she said to him. Her silence was angering her husband but he said nothing to her. He didn't want to hurt her more than she already was. Arthur left a week after Owain's burial. He tried to care for Elaine, but she shunned his comfort and help.

Gwaine walked into their bed chambers and found his wife in bed but she was shivering. It was the first time he had seen her in bed before him. Gwaine undressed out of his uniform and into his nightshirt. He climbed into bed and instantly wrapped his arms around his trembling wife. She would not relax even under his care. The loss of their son was hurting her more than she showed in public. It had been two weeks since he had been buried and in those two weeks she barely spoke. "Sleep my love." He whispered quietly, his hand rubbing up and down her arm.

"I can't." She whispered. Then she broke down. Her shivering had been her stopping herself from crying. The floodgates opened and she cried in his arms. "He was just a boy. I was supposed to die before him. Not our boy." Her tears were falling fast and there were many. "Why him? He was so young."

"I don't know why, my love. I wish he was still here. It was probably because he was a fragile child. You know he was early when he was born." He tried to reassure her. "If Lot had not hurt you, he would have been born a healthy boy and he would still be here."

"I know. I know." She sobbed in his arms. "But he was your son."

"He was your son too. We have another son." His own tears fell down his cheeks. "We're young. We can have more sons and daughters. They will all know of their brother, who died young."

"Yes." She spoke softly. "I want you to have a son of your own. I know you see Galahad as your own but I want you to have a son from your blood." She turned in his arms and faced him. "An heir for your family name."

In this position he could see her face properly for the first time in a long time. She looked ill and exhausted. "Oh my love. I don't need a son of my own. I am happy with a daughter and my stepson. With the two of them I am the happiest man in the world. Understand that, Elaine. I don't need anything more. You make my life complete." He leaned forward and kissed her tenderly. "You are my family." He ran his hand over her hair.

A small smile played on her lips but it never grew. "You are too." Kissing him softly and allowing him to wipe away her tears with his thumbs. "Don't go anywhere."

He nodded. "I shall not. I will never go away from you ever."

The small smile remained in her lips as she kissed him. When she pulled away, her eyes drifted closed. Gwaine smiled as she fell asleep. The first time since Owain had died.

Within 6 months of losing Owain and being able to sleep again, Elaine found herself unable to sleep again and found herself ill. She feared the worse as the dreaded influenza was still at large. Declan immediately examined her. He only smiled and held her hand. "You are not ill, your grace. You are expecting a child. I'd say 2 months have passed." His fingers pressing on her stomach. "Congratulations. I advise you to rest a lot."

"Thank you, Declan." She whispered in shock. She could hardly believe it. She and Gwaine had not been trying for long. She had felt she wasn't ready but now she was very ready. Losing Owain had left a hole in her heart. Another child would not fill that void. But it would definitely ease the pain. Her physician left her. She slowly sat up in bed with her hand on her stomach. A new hope. She knew she was very insecure on her throne with only a daughter and an illegitimate son. Another son would be great but Galahad would always inherit, even with him illegitimate. He was her pride and joy.

Elaine had not told Gwaine yet. She was going to wait until they were in the privacy of their chambers. The two of them were sitting in the dining hall alone. They were enjoying their time together. They were doing as much as they could. Losing Owain was hard on them both but they were coping by sticking together.

She reached forward and took nearly all of the grapes. "God I'm starving." She chuckled.

"Am I allowed a grape?" He asked jokingly.

She laughed. "No." She popped another one into her mouth.

Gwaine frowned as she seemed to only be eating grapes. "Do you want some meat?"

"No, thank you. I feel like something sweet." She smiled

Gwaine studied her as she continued to eat fruit, mainly grapes. He let out a gasp. "You're not?!"

Elaine laughed softly and nodded. "Yes. Two months passed."

"Are you happy about that? It's been six months since we lost Owain." He reached over and rested his large hand over her hand.

She nodded vigorously. "I am. This child," placing her hand on her stomach, " will never replace Owain. This baby is what we both wanted. We both wanted more children and our prayers have been answered. Owain will always be remembered. We will tell our son or daughter of their lost brother and that he is watching over us all."

Gwaine smiled widely. "Of course. Now, my love, eat up." Placing grapes on her plate. "You have to be having a girl. All those sweet things. You were the same with Anne." The two chuckled. "You had meats when you were having Owain."

"True. But I was eating more apples with Galahad." She laughed. "So that's your theory out the window." Popping another grape in her mouth and winking at him. "So we could be having a boy."

He laughed and nodded. "I just hope it's a baby." He stood up and walked over to her, kissing her softly. "I will see you in bed. I just have to write to my sister."

"Oh? Deciding to reconcile with her?"

"Yes. After we lost Owain, I realised that my family is very important to me. So I think it is best."

"Invite her here. She is very welcome to stay."

"You're going to regret saying that." He laughed and kissed her again. "I'll see you tonight." He reached down and stroked her stomach before he left.

A/N: Right. In about two chapters, I will have a BIG time jump and it will end soon. :( What you think about this chapter?

Response from chapter 56:

Moon Fox: I'm sorry. It was planned all along. :(