WARPED

Chapter 35

Stan was grumbling under his breath as he led Hazelle and Jocelyn through the Shack. Hazelle couldn't help but smile at his grumpiness. Classic Stan. She only wished they were meeting under better circumstances.
After crossing the threshold to the gift shop, Stan suddenly stopped so quickly that Hazelle walked right into him.

"Hey, watch where you're going, kid!" grouched Stan.

Hazelle's face burned, and she shot Jocelyn a look after hearing a muffled snort.

"Before you two even begin to explain to me why and how you got back here," Stan began, plugging in the code to the vending machine, "you need to be quiet. I can't have the twins knowing you're here. Things could get…complicated." He held his lantern high as the trio began the descent down into the depths of the Shack.

"How complicated are we talking here?" Jocelyn asked, absentmindedly playing with the end of her braid.

"The kind of complicated I don't feel like dealing with right now. We've got bigger fish to fry."

"But I don't like fish."

"What—? It's a metaphor, you knucklehead."

Jocelyn rolled her eyes.

Hazelle was quiet, her mind racing back to the last time she and Jocelyn had come down here. Both were still reeling over a lost friend, bruised and shaken. Hazelle was surprised Jocelyn didn't look more uneasy about being down here again so soon. But she was also Jocelyn Swanson—she was probably on the same page as Hazelle. She just didn't show it.

The three entered the portal room, and were bathed in the shocking ethereal blue of the portal.

"It's getting stronger," Hazelle breathed.

And so it was. The portal seemed to be pulsating, eager to be of use.

Hazelle glanced to Jocelyn, and watched as her friend's eyes widened.

"Stan…" Jocelyn began. "What have you been doing down here?"

Stan set the lantern down on his desk and was silent. Slowly, he turned and sat down heavily in his desk chair.

"Alright," he sighed, ignoring Jocelyn's question. "Hit me with it. How did you two get here?"

Hazelle's throat suddenly went dry. How would Stan react when he found out about Lucy or Jocelyn's new control of her powers? Would he be mad for the way they'd messed with their reality? Or mad at himself for not correctly guessing the consequences of Bill's interference?

"Uh…well…" Hazelle began, scratching the back of her neck.

"How about we just show you?" Jocelyn suggested.

Stan narrowed his eyes as Jocelyn rolled up her sleeves for dramatic effect. She brought her left hand up to her face, which was scrunched up in concentration. Hazelle warily watched Stan for his reaction as Jocelyn created a tiny portal like she had done in gym class. To her utter dismay, he remained stoic, eyebrows furrowed and mouth a thin line.

Jocelyn looked up expectantly at Stan, eyes bright with the light of the power coursing through her veins to the palm of her hand. Her face fell at Stan's lack of emotion.

Instead of yelling like he would've two weeks ago, Stan tiredly rubbed his eyes under his glasses.

"Alright, kid, you can put that away before you hurt someone."

Jocelyn looked offended at his emotionless response. "But I can control it now! Look!" Using both hands, she swelled the portal to the size of her arm span, rustling papers and making a machine on the wall crackle with static.

Hazelle jumped, startled, as Stan quickly ran to the machine and fiddled with the knobs, now angry.

"I said put that away! Do you ever listen?!"

Jocelyn smiled smugly and shrunk her portal, closing her fist around the swirling mass. Happy with Stan's response, Jocelyn flipped her braid over her shoulder and plopped down in the chair Stan had just vacated. "Finally, some emotion! Jeez, what's a girl gotta do to get a reaction around here?"

"Oh, I'll show you a reaction," Stan growled, rolling up a sleeve.

"What my dear, idiot friend is trying to say," Hazelle cut in, waving her hands to get Stan's violent thoughts to disappear, "is that we need your help."

"But I don't get it," Stan said, glaring at Jocelyn's comfortable position in his chair. "You kids just got back home. Sure, yeah, the loud one can control her portals, but that doesn't mean you use them right after you get back."

"Here's the thing…" Hazelle caught herself hacking away at her fingernails and stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets. "Something's...wrong."

Stan's eyes darkened, the shifting light of the portal refracting off his glasses. "Define wrong."

"WE FUCKED UP LUCY!" Jocelyn exclaimed, sitting up sharply. "We changed her history and everything! We came back and she was some new student who had no idea who we were! But she's just like the Lucy we came here with! We messed something up!"

Stan nodded, grim. "I was afraid somethin' like that would happen." He glared at the portal. "Stupid triangle went and screwed up everything."

"Wait," Hazelle said, gaping. "You think Bill did this?"

"I think he has some role in it, but he didn't do anything on purpose," Stan told them. "Look, I'll admit: the angry one grabbing him and sealing him off in another dimension took some guts. But it wasn't nearly enough to keep him out of our hair. He may not be able to open portals, but assuming we'd beaten him was a big mistake."

Hazelle crossed her arms over her chest, suddenly cold. A sinking feeling began to take place in her stomach. "What... What do you mean? We saw Lucy push Bill into that portal."

"And she did," Stan reaffirmed, reluctant. "But...you don't know him, kid. You don't know what he's capable of."

"And you do?" Jocelyn challenged.

"Yes! As a matter of fact, I do!" Stan yelled, clenching his fists to match Jocelyn's defiant stance. "I know he's coming back here to play his part in the apocalypse! And if you did know him, you'd know that he's already out and that your friend is floating somewhere out in left field in some other dimension!"

Silence sliced across the room, and Hazelle was only brought back from her stunned stupor by the incessant beeping of the portal's attached machinery. She swallowed as Stan rose to flick a switch, and when he turned to them, he winced.

"Apocalypse?" Jocelyn shrieked.

Stan rubbed his temples and glanced up at the ceiling. "Holy Moses, kid, do you wanna wake all of Oregon? I already toldja to be quiet!"

"What in the name of Moses are you talking about?" Jocelyn screeched. "What apocalypse?"

"Kid, look. I know you don't do this often, but I need you to listen to me. You, too, Four Eyes," he added, tugging them into a huddle. "There's...there's something comin'. Somethin' big, somethin' out of my hands. Yes, it involves Bill, and it's massive. It's gonna change everything."

"How do you know?" Hazelle demanded.

Stan shot the portal a wistful scowl. "I've got some deep connections to it. Connections I'm not telling you," he growled as Hazelle opened her mouth to ask.

"Well, if there's really something big coming," Jocelyn put together, "then you've gotta let us help fight it!" As Stan started shaking his head, she hurried on, "No, really! I can make portals and Hazelle's clever enough for all of us. We could totally help!"

"Kid...you don't get it," Stan said, jaw clenched. "Something big is coming to this town. My town. Not yours. This ain't your fight."

"Because you won't let it be!" Jocelyn snapped. "Hazelle, back me up on this."

But Hazelle's face could already feel her face drooping with realization. "Joss…"

"No!" Jocelyn yelled, backing away and curling her hands into fists at her sides. "Don't you do it! Don't use that sad tone of yours, Haze. Don't give me that look that says I'm not getting something here."

Hazelle took a deep breath. "Joss, he's right."

Jocelyn frowned.

"You know I want to help, too, but he's right: this...this isn't our world. Or our fight. Think about it: what Stan's talking about...it must be season two."

Jocelyn's eyes bulged. "Shit. Oh my gosh, I hadn't even realized."

"Please don't refer to the upcoming apocalypse as 'season two,'" Stan complained, pinching the bridge of his nose. "It's unnatural."

"Sorry." Hazelle met Jocelyn's understanding, upset gaze. "We can't interfere. It'll mess up the show in our reality. We'd be changing what Alex has planned for, uh...what comes next. Lord knows what parts of the Gravity Falls timeline we've initiated by coming back. We can't change any more things, Joss. Look what happened the last time we interfered."

Jocelyn nodded, sullen. Lucy's absence was becoming a heavier burden on them with every passing moment.

"I think," Stan said, "it may be best for you two to steer clear of Gravity Falls, at least for a while. Until things...blow over."

"Will they blow over?" Jocelyn asked, scrutinizing him.

"I can't answer that," Stan replied, hand flying to hold Journal #1. Although that's where his hand was, his eyes blazed in the direction of a framed picture of Dipper and Mabel on his desk. "I can only hope they do."

"You said something about Lucy, too," Hazelle noticed.

Stan cringed. "Sorry," he said quietly. "I, uh, thought you kids would've known that's what happened to her."

"I...we...figured." Hazelle's voice was hoarse. "It's just...it's way worse to hear it out loud."

But Jocelyn didn't seem fazed. In fact, the confirmation merely strengthened her resolve. "Stan, you gotta help us find her."

"What!" Stan blinked at them, alarmed. "You can't be serious."

"I am one hundred percent serious!" Jocelyn went on. "We can't just...there's no way we're leaving her out there in...oblivion or whatever!"

"I thought you two butted heads!" Stan exclaimed. "Now you wanna go risk your life to find her?"
"So what if we fight?" Jocelyn shot back. "She's my friend." Her eyes darkened. "I—I'm the one who brought us here. It's my fault she's gone."

Hazelle, alarmed by Jocelyn's internalized guilt and resolve, stepped forward, touching her friend's shoulder. "Joss," she said softly, "this is in no way your fault."

Jocelyn shrugged off Hazelle's hand. "It is. And I'll be damned if I can't get her back."

"Kids—" Stan broke off as the portal spluttered, sending shocks of blue light through the glass panel and blinding them. He lunged forward and mashed the buttons, making the portal relax, some leftover electric blue sparks tingling across the mysterious symbols of the machine.

"Jesus," Jocelyn muttered.

Stan fixed them with a stern frown. "I don't need to tell you two that portal jumping is dangerous. I don't even have to tell you that being here, right now, is dangerous. There are too many variables at play here, kids—stuff you don't know, stuff you don't understand. I know you wanna save your friend, but..." He wiped the back of his hand across his forehead. "Promise me you won't go searchin' for her. There's no guessing what could happen. Trust me on this…you don't wanna go looking for someone that may not be around anymore. It's a dark path."

Hazelle and Jocelyn exchanged a glance. The dangers of portal jumping to find Lucy were laid out before them like cards in blackjack. What would happen if they chose wrong? If they didn't take the risk? And why did Stan sound as if he was talking from experience?

"Okay, Stan," Jocelyn proclaimed. "We promise."

"Good." Stan deflated, as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. "I'm trustin' you kids. Now, you better scamper outta here: I don't...I don't know when things are gonna get bad."

Hazelle and Jocelyn left shortly after goodbyes were traded, heading back for the elevator. They watched Stan rev the portal back up and cross his threshold to go out and behold it, and could have sworn they heard him say, "My greatest achievement!" A pause. "Probably should've worn pants."

They hoped that he, caught up in his glee, hadn't seen their fingers crossed behind their backs.