"Rayna, what the hell?" Deacon irritatedly asked as Rayna pulled the bedroom blinds open filling the room with bright afternoon sunlight
"You've done nothing but lie around for days, Deacon! This isn't healthy. You need to get up, take a shower, eat something…please?" she begged
"I don't feel like it, alright?" he snapped as he pulled the covers tighter around himself
"Deacon, come on. I can't stand to see you this way."
"THIS WAY? This is how it is, Rayna! I'm gettin weaker and weaker. I'm tired all the time."
"You just overdid things a little with Maddie's wedding. You're OK. Please, for me? Get outta that bed? Come play with your grandson? He's been here 2 days, and you've barely looked his direction. Gunnar and Scarlett will be back in a couple hours. Don't you wanna spend any time with Clay?"
******silence*****
"Alright, FINE! Have it your way." Rayna slammed the bedroom door on her way out
Deacon rolled over and pulled the covers over his head to block the bright sunlight. He hadn't left the house in 4 days.
4 days earlier (at home after Maddie's wedding):
"Are you OK, Deacon?" Rayna asked as they got ready for bed
"Yeah, yeah, baby…I'm just really tired. Been sweatin all day in this monkey suit. I'm just gonna take a quick shower before bed." Deacon said as he stripped of his tux
Rayna had gone down the hall to their home office to catch up on Highway 65 emails and some paperwork.
"Deacon…..That's the longest quick shower in history." She joked as she came back into the bedroom 45 minutes later. The bathroom door was cracked slightly. She could still hear the water running.
Fear gripped her heart when he didn't respond.
"Babe, are you….Oh my god….Deacon! Can you get up?" She asked after opening the door to Deacon sitting on the bathroom floor, leaning against the tub, shower running.
"Deacon! Are you hurt…what…"
"No, I'm not hurt. I'm just too damn weak!" His pride was hurt more than anything as Rayna helped him up, and into bed
"Are you sure? Maybe we should go to the ER just to have you checked out."
"I'M FINE, RAYNA! I'M JUST TIRED. LETS JUST GO TO BED." He snapped
"What happened? Why were you on the floor?" she asked as he turned away from her in bed
"I fell alright! I've been light headed all damn day. Is that what you wanna hear?"
"Why didn't you say any…"
"Cause I didn't wanna ruin Maddie's big day. She's startin a whole new life, husband, baby…The last damn thing she needs right now is to have to worry about me!" he quietly answered without bothering to face Rayna
"Deacon! You need to see Dr. Rand. I can't believe you didn't say anything today."
"I just saw the Dr. Rayna…yesterday! He said things looked good. I'm sick. I'm gonna have bad days. I can't run to the goddamn Dr. with every little symptom."
"I'm calling the Dr. first thing in the morning, Deacon. If he wants to see you, you're going!"
"FINE, whatever. Let's just go to sleep, alright. I'm tired!" he snapped ending the conversation
Back to the present:
"HEY, DEACON? I need you to get up and watch Clay for a couple hours." Rayna breezed back into the bedroom waking Deacon with a squirmy baby on the bed
"Jesus, Rayna! I said I'm tired. Where the hell are Scarlett and Gunnar? I thought they were comin home today.
"Their plane is grounded in Chicago for bad weather. They're gonna be late getting back, and I have to meet a new group I'm trying to sign down at Highway 65. Bucky finally got them to agree to a meeting, but it's now or never. Come on, Deacon? Get up and take Clay, Please?"
"Just take him with you, Rayna!"
"NO, I need to focus on this meeting. Bucky's been trying for months to get them to meet with us. Please, Deacon? It's a couple hours. Just get up, and watch your grandson!" Rayna left the baby on the bed and quickly grabbed her purse and keys from the dresser
"RAYNA! GODDAMMIT, RAYNA! What if I get dizzy? I can't …." Deacon sat up and grabbed 4 month old Clay as he rolled from his back to tummy dangerously close to the edge of the bed
"Not so fast, big guy!" Deacon smiled as he scooped Clay into his arms for the first time in weeks. The baby cooed and laughed as his chubby little hands reached for Deacon's thick 4 day scruff growth
"You like that, huh? Guess I do need to trim this up a bit."
"You look more like your mamma everyday." Deacon sat the baby on his lap staring into his bright blue eyes, and kissing his little blonde head
"Guess I've been kind of a grouchy old man lately. I don't want you to remember me that way. Hell, I doubt you'll remember me at all." Deacon teared up a little imagining Clay's first birthday, first little league game.
"I missed a lot of your Uncle Mason's baseball games while I was tourin. Never got to be a cub scout leader, or …." His voice trailed off as he hugged the smiling baby boy
"Hey, Dad…Can I go downtown with Sage? There's a live band at the riverfront tonight." Mason asked poking his head cautiously into the room
"Speak of the devil! Uhhhh….How are you gettin there?" Deacon asked
"She's 17, Dad. She has her license. She's picking me up."
"You like em older, huh?" Deacon laughed
"Dad! Please?"
"Alright, but be back here by 9. You know you're on probation, and the judge said you can't be out past 9 without a parent."
"OK, thanks Dad. Love you." Mason ran for the door before Deacon could change his mind
"Love you too! 9PM MASON! NOT A SECOND LATER! KEEP YOUR PHONE ON. I BETTER BE ABLE TO REACH YOU!" Deacon yelled as the front door slammed
"Just us for a while. How about a bottle?" Deacon slowly got up hoping for no lightheaded spells while he was alone with Clay
"It's OK. Grandpa's a little slow, but we'll get your bottle." He hugged Clay as he slowly made his way to the kitchen with a now hungry, fussy baby in his arms
"Deacon…" Rayna found Deacon and Clay sound asleep together in Deacon's recliner. She couldn't help but smile seeing Deacon looking so peaceful with the baby on his chest. Clay's chubby little hand was on Deacon's face as he slumbered in his grandpa's arms. Rayna snapped a few pictures with her cell phone before Deacon woke up.
"Hey…How did your meetin go? Did you sign the new group?" Deacon sleepily asked
"Yeah, we did. Thanks for watching the baby. How are you feeling?"
"Not too bad. Better now that you're back. I'm sorry for bein such a damn crabass the past few days." Deacon gently kissed Rayna as he got up to put the sleeping baby in his pack and play
"I'm glad to see you up. You worry me, Deacon."
"I know. I'm sorry, baby. Guess I need to snap out of this funk and try to take things day by day. I really need a shower and some fresh clothes. Will you sit in the bathroom and talk to me?" Deacon quietly asked, worried he might fall again
"Yeah, I'm just gonna check on Mason. I'll be in there in a minute."
"He's out with Sage."
"What? Deacon, that's the 3rd time since Maddie's wedding. He's on probation. Do you really think he should be out practically every night?" Rayna asked
"I dunno, Ray. He likes her. She's NOT Kiera. He's following the rules and comin home when I tell him to. He's keepin his phone close and answering my calls to check in. I don't wanna be a hardass and make his summer hell. We're gettin along pretty well. I just want what might be his last memories of me to be good ones. I don't wanna fight with him, OK?" Deacon's voice cracked
"OK, I get it, and you're right. He hasn't given us any trouble with Sage." Rayna smiled and squeezed his hand reassuringly as they waked down the hall to the bedroom
"What sounds good for dinner, babe? I'll get or make you anything you want? You haven't eaten much in the past few days." Rayna asked as Deacon climbed out of the shower
"You…" he playfully nibbled her neck as he dried off
"Tell you what. How about a nice dinner and I'll be dessert." She playfully pulled away
"What if I want dessert first?" He asked grabbing her around the waist as she wiggled away again
"I want you to have dinner with me, Deacon. You've barely touched food in a few days. You need to keep your strength up."
"I'm OK, Ray. I just…it's hard…ya know? I hate puttin this on you. When I fell the other night I just…I dunno…I don't want you to be stuck takin care of me as I get sicker."
"Deacon, I love you. For better or worse, remember?"
"I love you too. I just can't help but think the better part is over." He sadly answered
"It's not, Deacon. Even if our time runs short we can make it the best we've had."
"I don't have any regrets, Ray. I hope we get another 50 years, but if we don't, I'll die knowing I had the love of my life, 3 beautiful kids, 2 grandkids, a dream career doing what I loved, and a life most people never experience." He pulled her close for a hug as he tried to fight the tears that seemed endless these days
"Take me out for dinner, Deacon? A date?" Rayna asked
"A date, huh? OK."
An hour later, freshly showered, Rayna climbed into the passenger seat of Deacon's truck in the driveway as he held the door and her hand helping her in.
"When did you have time to…" Rayna asked picking up the dozen long stem roses he'd left in the front seat for her
"I had Scarlett get em for me on their way to pick up the baby." He smiled as he pulled out of the driveway
"Where are we going?" She asked as she opened the card attached to the roses
"It's a surprise. You asked for a date. You got it, baby."
Tears stung Rayna's eyes as she read the card:
Rayna,
I know I've been a thorn since before you became a Claybourne
I've given you years of stress, but I hope no regrets
I'm hoping for more time, not less
But if the time comes to mourn…
I'll go knowing I had the best
Love always,
Deacon
"The bluebird." Rayna smiled as Deacon pulled into the parking lot
"Yeah, we haven't been here together in years. Those sweet potato fries sound awfully good. I think Vince and the Time Jumpers are playin tonight."
"Hey, Rayna, Deacon! It's great to see you guys. It's been years. How are you?" Sarah the owner asked as she took their food and drink order personally
"uuhhh, we're good. Just havin a little date night. Doin a little reminiscing about old times. How have you been? Place looks great. Same as last time I was here probably 10 years ago." Deacon smiled looking around
"I think it's been about 15 for me, Rayna recalled her last Bluebird visit."
"We've missed you guys. You really should come by more often than once a decade. Fans still ask all the time if you ever come in."
"We'll try to come around more."
"You're welcome anytime. We'll make room for you if you wanna get in the round and play a few. I'm sure Vince wouldn't mind sharing his time."
"Maybe some other night. We're just kinda out for a quiet date night alone together tonight." Deacon smiled and grabbed Rayna's hand across the table
"OK, offers open anytime." Sarah said as she rushed off to get their order
"Hey, before you go there's been a guy around your age askin a lot of questions about you, Deacon. He was here a month or so ago and I kinda blew him off thinkin he was a crazy fan. The staff says he's been back a few times since asking for any information he can get about you. Says his name is John from Natchez Mississippi. He wouldn't give a last name, but since he's asked several times for personal information about you I thought you should at least be aware that he's around."
"The only John I knew in Natchez was my dad. He's been dead for 20 years, but thanks for the heads up. If he happens to come back, call me." Deacon said as he paid the check
"So are you curious who this John from Natchez is?" Rayna asked as they walked hand in hand over the John Seigenthaler pedestrian bridge later that night. Seeing the John in the sign on the bridge reminded her of Sarah's comments earlier
"Like Sarah said, probably just an overzealous fan. My online bio says I'm originally from Natchez. Any weirdo could read it and say he's from Natchez. I can't think if a single John from Natchez that might be askin about me."
"Yeah, I guess it's nothing to worry about."
"I believe you promised me dessert if I ate dinner with you." Deacon said changing the subject and pulling Rayna in for a deep kiss halfway across the bridge