Disclaimer: Don't own. None of it. Nada.

A/N: Crazy chapter is crazy. But hey, we've gotten through all the opening introductions and setups, so now we can actually get into the main plot. So yeah, the "adventure" part of the storyline is set to begin right about now.

P.S. Capricious and zany old lady antagonists are the 180% of the best kind.

Thanks to H.C., Jac, and Youdidntwave for your reviews! Keep them coming; they feed my motivation!

VII: Myth

"The Separatists? But how? I know that we're technically in their territory, but all our messages are encrypted with military-grade, Alliance-specific codes! Could they really have broken them that fast?" Padmé asked, sounding confused and a little frightened.

Anakin's mind was racing with the exact same question. How had the Separatists been able to intercept and decode the transmission? And Padmé was right to be nervous. Though they might have been criminals according to Republic law, the Alliance was made up, so far as he knew, of Republic citizens. Though he had been brought up to speed on the basics of what had happened in the galaxy in the last five years, Anakin didn't really know what the exact terms were of the ceasefire between the Republic and the Separatists.

But he didn't have to know the exact terms to know that the discovery by the Separatists of armed, militant Republic citizens on Lycradel III would be a diplomatic nightmare.

At worst, it could restart the war. At best, the Republic would have to prove to the Separatists that it had no hand in the Alliance's doings. And that would mean, among other things, Padmé and her friends being tried to the full extent of the law, receiving no leniency.

Republic law if they were lucky.

Separatist law if they weren't.

Anakin cursed sharply under his breath. He had helped out with the repairs to the communications system that had been salvaged from the downed Star Nymph, but he hadn't stayed around to oversee the actual transmissions. Now he wished he had. Instead, he had focused all of his time on centering himself for his return to a galaxy still in turmoil, still uncertain of himself after too many close brushes with the Dark Side.

It was ironic, really. In doing what looked on the surface like a very Jedi thing to do, he had, in reality, been letting his fear – fear of himself this time – dictate his actions again.

Sensing that Padmé was still waiting for a reply, he shook his head and said, "I don't know." He thought for a moment. "Is there any way for them to trace your people or equipment back to Alliance headquarters or your allies in the Senate?"

"Besides me, you mean?"

"Yeah. Besides you."

She thought for a moment, brows knitted in concentration. "I don't think so. A simple investigation will reveal that all the rest of the personnel here are Republic citizens, mostly from the core worlds. Educated, and high trained. But nothing specifically linking them. Our recruitment process is very discreet. And most of our equipment was either donated by unnamed sympathizers or," here she paused and then winced, "stolen. But I think, to the untrained eye, it would appear incoherent."

"Unless they find you," Anakin said heavily. Her explanation had made up his mind. It was exactly what he didn't want to do to start off his new life. But it was the very least he could do to repay these people who had been so kind to him, with nothing to gain for themselves.

"Which is why they're not going to find you."

Padmé just stared at him blankly. "Um. I know you said you liked it here, but I don't really know how well I would do if you hide me in a cave somewhere planning to come back later. I think I'm just going to have to start preparing my defense."

Anakin sighed heavily and removed the cap he had been given on his first day with the troop. He handed it to her. "Put this on."

She did. It was slightly too large for her, shadowing her facial features. Perfect.

"Is this my brilliant disguise?" Padmé asked sarcastically.

"It doesn't have to be. You don't need to be disguised per se, you just need to blend in and hope we don't meet any high-ranking Separatists who might recognize you." He steeled himself, sensing that she wasn't going to like his idea and knowing from her actions during the occupation of Naboo and simply from her reputation how incredibly stubborn she could be. "They'll see what they think they're going to see, and they won't think to see Padmé Amidala in the role of a foot soldier. Especially if they're too distracted by the presence of…well, me – to think about anything else."

She protested instantly, right on cue. "No. No, you can't – "

"Please don't try to argue with me on this one, Padmé. As a lost Jedi who was unable to contact anyone outside this system, I have a logical reason to be here. You don't. Hopefully, there's not too many of them, and we can commandeer the ship from them until we reach somewhere where you and your people can safely disappear. But if we can't fight our way out of this one, we'll have to talk our way out, and I have the best chance of doing that successfully. Now," he said firmly, "we're going to head back to the clearing. If we hurry we can get there by the time they've finished landing. I want you to stay behind me at all times and try to blend into the crowd once we get there."

For a moment, it looked like she was going to try to argue again, but she finally nodded sharply, still looking displeased, and they began to head back to the clearing as quickly and quietly as they could.

When they were nearly there, however, the distinctive muffled roar of the Separatist ship's engines faded away to almost nothing. Anakin stopped abruptly and stayed very still, drawing on the Force to amplify his sense abilities. He heard the ship settle, and then there was a hissing of air as pistons released to open the hatch and lower the gangway.

Padmé caught up to him and he held out a hand for her to stop. Still straining, he could hear boots on metal, the murmurings of the crew gathered in the clearing – certainly they had realized by now that the ship was not one of theirs – and then, suddenly, blaster fire.

"Come on!" he cried, grabbing his stave and racing for the clearing. "And stay in the back when we get there!"

Fortunately, at the sight of the unfamiliar ship coming in to land, the Alliance group had had the foresight to create some last-minute cover that, while it would've been pitiful had the ship decided to fire on them from above, was quite effective against hand weapons. It was clear to Anakin, though, in the split second that he took to assess the situation before jumping headlong into the fray, that they were largely outnumbered and would soon be overrun.

Staying within the cover of the forest, Anakin turned and raced silently along the edge of the clearing until he was right across from where a clump of Seps had gathered at the exit to the ship and were firing on the Alliance soldiers. He picked out their commander within moments: an olive-skinned human male with officer's bars on his uniform and a haughty expression.

Even as the enemy troops nearest him pushed forward to try to circumvent the makeshift barriers, Anakin exploded out of the trees, racing forward to swiftly drop to one knee and swing his stave around himself in a practiced arc, releasing a low, controlled Force wave that knocked all the Seps between him and the ship neatly off their feet. All activity in the clearing ceased for a moment before one of the Seps got it into his head to start randomly firing at whatever it was that had just appeared out of the brush.

Anakin dodged to the side and fluidly rolled to his feet before bringing his stave up to meet the next shot, which had been aimed solidly at his chest. He could feel the power behind the shot, but a quick glance showed no damage done to the stave itself.

"Well, would you look at that," he said into the stunned silence. "It does absorb blaster fire. That's gonna make this fun."

After another moment of stunned silence, the enemy soldiers began to fire again, though one of them disappeared into the ship's hatch, presumably for reinforcements. Let them call for help, Anakin thought as the Force surged within him in the familiar fierce exaltation of battle, fears about his spiritual health fleeing before the storm as he whirled the stave behind him to intercept a shot from one of the soldiers from his first blow who had gotten up again. Let them go for reinforcements. Little good it'll do them! I'm back!

Rushing toward the center of them now, he fought his way through in a matter of seconds, leaving a load of bruises. Reaching their commanding officer, he neatly tripped him and then put the end of the stave against his throat when he tried to get up. "Uh-uh. Not gonna happen today, buddy." The rest of the men, as expected, stopped fighting with their leader in peril. Anakin took in his opponent, finding nothing new or noteworthy that he hadn't noticed at first glance. A human male in his late thirties with the abject fear of a bully who suddenly finds himself on the (literal) other end of the stick. The man was clearly terrified of Anakin, and with any luck, they would be able to use that to get out of this impending disaster. "I need to speak with the commander of this ship. Is that you?"

"No," came a gravelly, creaky voice from the ship's gangway. "That would be me."

Anakin turned and was surprised to see and elderly woman with the same basic skin tone as the man still beneath him, though hers was crevassed with wrinkles and her neatly pulled-back hair was the snow white of very old age.

She returned his stare with a level gaze of open curiosity and the sort of admiration that had always made his skin crawl with bad memories from his childhood. It was the look of someone who had found a commodity they suddenly needed. It said, Yes, that. That will do just perfectly for what I had in mind.

"Well, if I had known there was a Jedi boy squatting on my territory, I wouldn't have had to spend so much time shopping through the bounty-hunting scum of the earth." She sighed a very put-upon sigh that would've suited a spoiled eight-year-old princess more than an elderly head of state (which was what she certainly had to be) and then said, "But no matter. I've found you now, and you seem to be in good working order, if the state of my men are anything to go by, and that's what counts. What's your name, Jedi boy?"

Now. Now was the time to put his plan in motion and see if he couldn't repay the kindness that he had been shown by Padmé and the other members of the Alliance. Squaring his shoulders with a defiant tilt of his head, he declared, "Anakin Skywalker."

She just laughed.

Padmé's rebels shifted and murmured uneasily.

She laughed for a very long time, and when she was done she had to wipe tears away from her eyes. The two guards flanking her seemed unfazed, suggesting that they were used to accommodating her whims and fancies without question.

Anakin, for his part, was very confused.

"I meant your real name."

Anakin fumbled for words. "Uh, that is my real name."

"Don't be ridiculous, boy. Everyone knows that Anakin Skywalker is a myth."

He blinked for a few moments, then managed, "…a myth?"

"Oh, but you wouldn't know, would you? Poor dear. You've been stuck here all alone, and with no HoloNet. I could not live!" She fanned herself with fluttery movements before continuing. "It's been all over the academic papers in the last few years. These are real scholars, mind you, not the press or, Lady forbid, the tabloids. They've analyzed what can be known about that legendary Jedi's life and come to the conclusion that it was all a fabrication. A show! A sham! And probably the most brilliantly and intricately constructed piece of propaganda ever to grace the minds of average galactic citizen. The statistical analysis is done and the conclusion is spreading across the galaxy. And even the Jedi were in on it! Of course, they and the Senate all deny it, but pretty much his entire 'acquaintance' was from either the Jedi, the Senate, or the military – all funded by Republic taxes. There's just not enough evidence to prove that he ever even existed." She shook her head grimly. "I know it must be hard learning that your hero is the product of a lie, but so it goes. But you must have noticed that he was always away at war, yes? Oh, but look at me carrying on. You must be wondering what my interest is in you…what was your real name?"

Anakin just stared. Had Ahsoka been here, she would probably have given her second lightsaber for a holocamera; he couldn't begin to imagine what his face must look like right now. Dimly, he could feel the amusement of a few of the Alliance members. So apparently, this ridiculous theory had been thought to have been long dead in the more educated circles of the Republic, but not so much in Separatist space.

When he didn't reply right away, she just waved a hand at him and said impatiently, "Never mind, 'Jedi boy' will do. It's not as though there are any others of those about here. So, Jedi boy, how would you like a ride off this isolated rock for you and your band of motley friends? Oh, no," she said when he tried to start explaining, "I don't care who they are or where they came from. If they'll help you help me, I can have them taken wherever they need to go – as far as the edge of Republic space. So, Jedi boy, are you willing to help me in exchange for passage?"

Anakin was – albeit warily – willing, but he couldn't speak for the others. He turned, and, pretending to scan the entire group, surreptitiously caught Padmé's eye. When she gave a tiny nod, he turned and nodded shortly to the crazy old crone.

"Excellent!" She clapped her hands together before proclaiming, "Jedi boy, I have a job for you!"