Loki hadn't touched his food for the ten minutes we had been at the diner. I watched him nervously and sighed.
"I know it's not a fabulous meal you're so used to, but you could at least try it."
"I'm deciding how to eat it."
There was a childlike quality in his ruminations. I groaned.
"You pick it up with the two hands god gave you, yeah?"
Nice, no way you can retract that statement, genius.
Loki wrapped his long fingers around the burger and lifted it off the red plastic plate. A large cluster of onion and tomatoes fell out the other end, dragging the patty down with them.
"I'm assuming that wasn't meant to happen."
"Honestly can't you do anything right?" I echoed.
Something sparked in his eye. Loki glared and me and pushed his plate away, "I can't eat this filth." He turned his face away, furious. Boy this guy's got a bad case of man-PMS, look at those mood swings.
"Jeez, chill your butt," I mumbled, switching the plates around.
He glared at the mac'n'cheese. Loki must've been very hungry to get over his ego so soon. He picked up the fork and picked through his food while I reassembled the burger and grabbed a bottle of mustard off the tray in the corner.
"Well?" I asked after he had eaten.
"Edible," he observed.
"Oh come on, don't be such a stiff," I frowned. "It's not all that bad."
"Is all earth-food so… synthetic?"
I reflected on that no more than four seconds – "Yes."
Loki ate in silence. He did not look very pleased, but I could see his mind was occupied with something other than the quality of 'Midgardian Cuisine', as he called it.
When the bill came, I shelled out every last penny from my wallet.
"Is it advisable to be wandering around with no money?" He asked.
"Highly unadvisable. Thought they'd put us on kitchen duty for sure."
"Why would they do that?"
"Well, if you run short of cash, you have to pay them with manual labour. At least that's the rule here in town."
"That's horrible."
"I know, but it's not happening to us, so grab your jacket and let's go."
Loki rolled his shirt-sleeves down and shrugged on his jacket as we exited the diner. It was much cooler outside and I pushed my hands into my pockets. I felt something coarse in the lining and picked at it with my fingernail. Pulling my hand out, I found a crushed but valuable bill of a rather high denomination.
"Well what do you know?" I grinned, straightening out the bill on my hand. "Looks like I'll have money for gas after all."
I was in the process of slipping it into my wallet when something forced its way past me at top speed. I stumbled and fell into Loki and the wallet was ripped out of my hand.
"Hey!" I yelled after the two hooded figures charging down the streets.
"They seem to have robbed you."
I turned venomously to him and hissed, "THANKS FOR THE UPDATE."
"Oh, don't pull your hair like a lesser primate like that," Loki wrinkled his nose.
"All my money! My identification!" I wailed. "How am I supposed to live?"
He creased his forehead, watching me circle the ground, clutching my head.
"Why aren't you panicking, Loki? This affects you too!"
"Why didn't you run after them?"
"I am this close to-" I made strangulating gestures and then closed my eyes and breathed. "Alright, Paton, calm down. Just go to police in the morning and lodge a complaint. Your check comes in a week, plus you did well on the delivery tonight. Relax. Just ration your supplies for a couple of days."
But Paton, you're shopping for two now.
"DAMN IT ALL."
"I can't say, but I think I'm becoming accustomed to your regular outbursts."
"Let's just go home," I sighed dejectedly. What a shit day. As if to make matters worse, the tank ran out of gas somewhere between the game-park and Riverside.
I banged my head on the steering wheel, repeating the word, "stupid" several times. I heard the car door open and shut and when I lifted my head I felt the car inching forward, rolling along the dark road at snail's pace. I twisted around and looked through the little window at the back. Loki was pushing the truck forward, his arms outstretched in front of him and his body at a slight angle to the road. I forced my door open and jumped out, going to the back.
Loki hadn't broken a sweat at all.
I pressed my palms against the cool metal of the old truck and put my back into it. We pushed the car along to Riverside in silence.
Ooooh uncharacteristic Loki. Like?