Chapter 6—Who is and who wants?
Let it not be forgotten that I had Ron "the inhaler of food" and Hermione "tattle tail to authority" still being my best friends (cough, cough). What I did not know was that Dumdum was not looking to free Snape as a priority, nor was he looking for a replacement Potion Professor. Therefore, we now had Madeye as DADA and a Remus Lupin was hired by Professor McGonagall as Potion Professor.
I was a little surprised at breakfast when I get this slap on the back of the head and told by the slapper, Professor McGonagall, to report to her office after breakfast, she had a surprise for me. When I entered, there was Professor McGonagall and Dumdum.
"Harry I asked you to come to my office, I did not ask the Headmaster to come and I find his presence insulting".
"That as it may be but I was told that you two were acting conspiratorial and overly friendly at breakfast and I wish to get to the bottom of it immediately".
"Of course Headmaster, I would never let Granger the snitch information be scowled upon, yes I have asked Professor McGonagall to marry me and I believe she is favorably considering the offer" I was actually able to keep a straight face.
"That is not possible you are promised to…" Dumdum caught himself before acknowledging anything.
"So Headmaster this is a private matter between Harry and me so as Headmaster you have no need to be involved, so please leave."
Dumdum left and McGonagall started to laugh so hard I was scared. She pulled out a bottle of scotch and had a drop. "Harry you are just too much. I however think that I have to give credence to your story of the other day. The reason I asked you here was to give you hell for letting me get so… anyway I wanted to offer animagus training if you wished. Your magic is way advanced so it may be possible to become an animagus in the near future."
I accepted and we set up times to practice, with the promise that this would be kept secret for as long as possible.
By lunch, I had Hermione and Ron almost sitting in my lap. Dumdum must want answers or information. Well he got his share but not like he wanted. The new professor Lupin strolls over to introduce himself to me for some reason.
Ron is stuffing his face and has his disgusting rat on the table gobbling down the crumbs and bits of food that miss Ron's face. The professor walks up pulls his wand and petrified the rat and Ron after he tried to object after swallowing. "Call for the Aurors" Lupin screams.
I am beginning to wonder if there is such a thing as a normal day in this asylum. Amelia and Tonks show up and Lupin has some incredible tale he tells them. The three-point their wands at the rat and he turns into a horrible squat man. Lupin tries to strangle him with his bare hands, Tonks stuns Lupin, and Amelia touches her badge and a small army of Aurors charge into the Great Hall. I calmly get up, move to the other end of the table, fill my plate, and enjoy the circus of which I am not the center attraction.
While I am savoring some very tender beef chunks in thick gravy, the fun continues. Dumdum wants in to do something and the Aurors point their wands at him with threats. Amelia is yelling at Dumdum while the teachers are all excited as they recognize the rat man. Madeye looks like he wants to curse something but is undecided if its rat man or the Aurors.
Hermione is all a dither; it looks like she wants to help Ron but then she wants to help Dumdum. The green beans in butter and almonds are quite good. I retired that night feeling quite relaxed. I activated my wards around my bed thinking that it is not every day that someone is not pointing a wand at me or I am not the centre of attention. Then there was the next day.
I arrived at breakfast and everyone wanted my blood or something. "Your godfather is going to get a trial," said someone. "I'm your godfather's best friend and he's innocent."
Mr. Potter I need to see you in my office immediately"
"Your due in class in five minutes Mr. Potter." To hell with this and I 'faded' to Gringotts.
"Harry my friend what brings you here, you should be celebrating", Ragnok laughed.
"As soon as someone tells me what the hell is going on we can celebrate"
So Ragnok gave me a rundown on what had happened to Sirius Black my Godfather and the secret keeper Wormtail the rat man. How Black was to get a trial after umpteen years in Azkaban.
I said, "OK I understand and now ask me if I care, so how's the wife and kids?"
I 'faded' back to Hogwarts in time for my animagus training.
/Scene Break/
I got a double team from Ron and Hermione. "Where were you? What did you do?" ...I just ignore them.
What is funny is I never go to classes or detention unless the guard drags me there. The guard has not been dragging me anywhere recently so I come and go as I wish. Animagus training is real and I have a paw already. Looks like I will be a large cat.
/Scene Break/
Time has come for the other schools to arrive for the big tournament. I was so thrilled I was in the founder's library writing another letter to Fleur. Trouble with this is that we are not sure Dumdum is not monitoring my mail so we have to write like pen pals. I could do with a few sex filled "what we will do when we get together again" letters.
McGonagall was herding the Hogwarts students to meet the other schools when I slipped away. I just hoped to miss all the speeches that usually come with those people of importance that tell everyone the importance of themselves and how its they that make it all possible.
I finally headed down to the Great Hall only to be met by my irate wife demanding hugs and kisses until we could get somewhere private. She dragged me by the hand to a large carriage with an enlarged interior and my wife's private quarters. We spent the night playing cards, yea right; she had planned this out to include a meal, snacks besides her and an evening of pleasure.
The next morning I dragged myself into the Great Hall for breakfast after having no sleep. I probably looked like I felt but I would not have changed a thing until the two inquisitors started. Fleur and I decided to keep us a secret as long as possible, which is not long at Hogwarts; it did last until the Goblet of fire started spitting out names.
/Scene Break/
Ron being the alert fellow he had noticed I was not sleeping in my bed. Hermione being the noisiest female on the planet was asking questions at machine gun speed. I finally got tired of it that morning and said "Hermione I have a girl friend here at Hogwarts and I am sleeping with her"
"Who is she? How do you get past the stairs to the girls dorm?" How long have you…"
Hermione and I had started the rumor mill at Hogwarts; if there was a female ear in a mile our conversation everything would be heard.
"Hermione, cool it, it's not a Gryffindore, and there is no trick stairs down there". Now these words were translated into down meaning Slytherin and not down to the carriage. Fleur had arrived and was listening in as the Great Hall was now silent or the boy who opened his mouth was hit or something stuffed into it to keep them quiet.
"So who is it in Slytherin you're dating? Hermione kept the questions coming to the delight of the girls of Hogwarts.
"Well I'll tell you right now it's not Pansy" rumor one started.
"Then who is it that you are protecting? Hermione would make a good interrogator for MI-5.
"Well I am not telling but I like my girls smart and pretty" rumor number two was started.
"So who is it Harry there are only a couple of Slytherin girls that meet those facts"
Ah how stupid the sheep are led, I thought.
"Oh dear you think it is Slytherin, when did I say that? No I like my girls loyal and smart" rumor three and four were in effect. The explosion was eminent the list was narrowing. Hogwarts rumors forever, CHARGE!
/Scene Break/
The tables of Hogwarts Great Hall were change into bleacher to view the Goblet of fire and the great Dumbledore. The Weasley twins had lost their beards and every one was ready for the great event. Creevey had his camera flashing and it was almost a royal event.
The Hogwarts rumor mill had me Arse about face with Susan Bones, Buggering Pansy, or bonking Daphne Greengrass as primary victims.
Finally the Great and Magnificent Albus 'too many named' Dumbledore announced the beginning of the Triwizard tournament. There in attendance was Cornelius Fudge the Prime minister, Madam Umbridge, Percy Weatherbe, and numerous Wizengemot members and the cleaning crew.
A large production was made about the automatic lighting of the magical cup on the designated minute. And Walla, it lit as the house lights dimmed. A piece of parchment flew out of the fire and was caught by Dumbledore to announce the first champion.
"And the champion for Durmstrang is Victor Krum" and the Durmstrang student go hyper clapping and yelling and the champion is asked to proceed to the chamber behind the teachers table.
"And the Beauxbatons champion is Fleur Gryffendore." and the Beauxbatons students do their thing and the champion is asked to proceed to the chamber behind the teacher's table.
"And the Hogwarts champion is Cedrick Diggory" and Hogwarts students try to bring the house down and the champion is asked to proceed to the chamber behind the teacher's table.
"So now that we have our three champions…" the Goblet again lights and the Goblet spits out Harry Potter. Hermione tries to push me to join the others.
"If you push me one more time I will push you so far up Ron's ass it will take you a week to find your way out"
"Mr. Potter please join the other champions." Dumdum asks.
"Mr. Potter you need to join us." Dumdum demands.
Everyone is looking at me and pointing, I just stood up and said, "I hope you are not referring to me, I am not Harry Potter. Well no one believed that and the guards drag me into the chamber behind the teacher's table, with the champions.
"Now Harry you cannot dodge the Goblet, it had selected your name and you must compete" Dumdum was in his glory.
"Well I hope you find Harry Potter as I am Harry Doe and have no reason to be here".
Well that was not working so I requested that the Goblins prove who I was. About twenty minutes later Ragnok came in with Amelia Bones the head of the DMLE.
"Ragnok, will you tell…"
"You will not be familiar with me Dumbledore, you will use my proper title when addressing me," Ragnok was not joking around.
"I am sorry Bank Manager Ragnok, Senior advisor to the king, but we have a problem this child, is stating he is not Harry Potter and he has requested your verification",Dumdum showed his place to the Goblin.
"Hi Harry how are you doing, causing as much trouble as a Goblin I see" Ragnok said.
"Of course you are correct but they seem to believe that I am Harry Potter so I asked for indisputable identification, Ragnok."
"Why let me tell everyone I know this friend for ages and he is known by me, the Goblins, London and Scotland Ministry's as Harry Doe. So if you are looking for Harry Potter I can not help you".
No one missed that Harry had not used Ragnok's official name and yet Ragnok was chatting as a friend to who? Harry Doe?
Well if you think that the rumor mill got started you will be wrong, it exploded as Harry walked arm and arm with Fleur from the chamber behind the teacher's table and out of the Great Hall, it was then that someone realized Fleur's last name. The confusion was so great that even Dumdum thought he had kidnapped the wrong kid.
/Scene Break/
The next morning the confusion continued if you were paying attention, which most of Hogwarts was and were deep into this soap opera. Hermione was hammering, "Harry if you're not Harry Potter who are you and what about your scar?"
"I am who I am; I like to be called Harry"
"Fleur was right in on causing trouble, "Oh his real name, yes, Henry…"and she paused.
Hermione had her quill out and poised after Fleur said Henry.
"That's why we call him Harry, it's kind of a nick name," Fleur laughed.
Hermione's frustration was clearly evident.