Hey, all. Sorry about the delay. Things have... yeah. I suck.

Thanks to Stratan for being the best beta ever, and for hanging out with me last week, even though it was tough as shit for him to get there. ILY, dude, and miss you already :)

Thanks to stephk0525 and claireoth for prereading and giving me all their knee-jerk reactions. I loves you guys, too. SFM.

Thanks for everyone who recs and adds and reviews this fic. OMG, you all amaze me and I bow to you.

Ok, so don't kill me...

Chapter 10

Edward

"God damn it, Bella, just hit the motherfucker so we can go!" I shouted at her from behind the fence.

She spun around to face me, severely annoyed with my impatience. "I would, except for the teensy little fact that I don't know what I'm doing."

"Yeah, that's pretty fucking apparent."

She ignored me and just spun back around.

She held the bat awkwardly and watched the machine again. She'd been at it for... Well, I'd lost track of how fucking long I'd stood here watching her. Each time she swung, she caught nothing but air. I was ready to go back home, but I couldn't seem to get the stubborn girl to move.

Now we were the only ones left. Everyone else had abandoned us in order to watch something less... painful.

Not that I could blame them.

I groaned when the ball flew into the fence in front of me and finally decided that I was going to have to do something to help her, as much as I didn't want to. I'd managed to stay clear of Bella the whole night. I'd sat across from her at the restaurant and kept to the opposite side of the small bookstore we'd snuck inside, even though I wanted to see her skim over each book she picked up and find out which passages moved her; what it was about the book she'd left with that had urged her to buy it. Because I'd been so fucking determined to prevent a repeat of what happened in the car, I'd missed nearly our entire night together. This was the first time since we'd arrived in Port Angeles that we'd really interacted with one another.

Which was exactly why I didn't want to try any of this shit in the first place. I didn't know how to be some average college student on a date. I didn't know what balance was... always bouncing around from such opposite sides of the spectrum.

And I had no idea how Bella could stand to be around me when I could hardly stand to be around myself...

Another ball came flying at me, hitting the fence with a loud clanging noise before finally falling to the ground. I was going to have to do something further to help her, instead of standing here and shouting instructions at her.

Especially if I was going to be able to get her back home at a decent hour and keep on Chief Swan's good side. If he had one, that is.

I waited until another ball had flown out of the machine before opening the gate and coming up behind her. I put my hands on her shoulders, ignoring the shaky breath that fell from her lips as I did, and pulled her body back toward me so that her stance was right. Then I pushed her feet out a little with mine, redistributed her weight, and stood back to watch.

Swing.

Miss.

I readjusted her again, careful to keep my dick away from her ass. That was the last thing I needed right now.

And pretty much the only thing I could think of.

Another ball flew toward us.

Nothing. She couldn't even tip it.

I growled, "You've got to be fucking kidding me."

"I give up," she said, sounding like she was ready to cry. "I don't know why I agreed to do this. I don't play sports. I've never played sports. So let's just go. I know you're pissed off about standing here for so long, anyway."

I hated how her voice sounded and was suddenly ready to stand here as long as it took for her to hit the damn ball. Just so she'd be happy. "No. I... Try hitting with your left."

"But I'm right handed," she argued, pushing at the black helmet on her head. She turned to face me and I realized how oddly cute she was in the oversized thing. "Emmett said this side is where I'm supposed to stand."

"Humor me, Bella."

She didn't move.

"Just once."

She grumbled something under her breath and hurried over to the other side of the plate. She chewed on her lip and got ready, her hands gripping onto the bat tightly.

"Like this?" she asked nervously.

"Yeah."

The ball shot out of the machine, the crack of the bat hitting it high into the air following just after. I blinked rapidly, staring at an equally stupefied Bella, and then suddenly found myself wrapped up in a squealing heap of limbs and had soft, coconut scented hair plastered against my nose.

For the first time in years, I laughed. And it felt good.

Bella froze in my arms, slowly bringing her head back to look at me fully as her body slid down mine. She stood there molded against me with an awed, beaming smile on her face.

I abruptly discovered that I'd laugh for all eternity to see that smile. The thought was like being dunked in a tub of ice cold water, chilling me to the bone.

I was in way over my head with this girl.

"Do it again," she murmured, her eyes darting to my lips.

I cleared my throat and tried for nonchalance. "I think you should do that again," I returned.

Thankfully, she was still too high off her success to notice how uncomfortable I was. "Oh, trust me. I'm going to. Over and over again until they kick us out."

I think I managed to grin a little with that.

She made another squealing sound, one I found fascinating. "Holy fuck, I won the lottery."

I rolled my eyes. "Please. Get your ass back up to the plate."

She reached out to put her hand on my jaw. "Your smile is amazing, Edward. Why don't you ever let people see you for what you truly are?"

"Fucked up?" I retorted.

She shook her head obstinately. "Beautiful."

I backed away from her, staring down at the ground. I couldn't keep deceiving her like I was. She deserved to know the truth about me before her opinion of me got even higher or before she...

I couldn't even think it.

But no matter how much I wanted to list off every single horrific thing that had happened to me, give her the thousands of reasons why I was such a shitty person, I couldn't do it. I couldn't risk losing her, the one person I'd ever let see my darkened soul.

So I shoved my hands in my pockets and rushed over to the small section of seating just outside the cage. I sat down and habitually reached for a smoke, remembering too fucking late that I didn't do that shit anymore.

Because of her. All of it was because of her.

I watched her hit the ball over and over again, driving them high and to the left each and every time. She was a natural at bat, and I had to wonder how the fuck this clumsy girl managed to find such grace here. And if she was just as talented fielding a ball as she was at hitting it.

Eventually, she stopped hitting and hurried out of the cage. She shut the machine down and threw off the helmet, still grinning, before finally working her way to me.

"Get bored?" I asked as she approached.

"Nope. Just feel like my arms are going to fall off."

I noticed then that her breathing was a little rough and her skin was dewy with sweat. "How's the heart?" I murmured, reaching out to feel it like I always did.

Its steadiness reassured me for some reason, and feeling it pulse beneath her skin reminded me of how easily life could slip away from you. I'd always been so careless with my own mortality, but thinking of how this Maggie person gave Bella life brought new meaning to my own. I'd navigated hell to get to where I was today, and maybe one day in some distant form of my future, I'd manage to change someone's life the way that Bella's surgeon had changed hers.

"It's fine."

There was a lull of silence, and with it came this inexplicable drive to know about Maggie. I hadn't given myself the opportunity to dwell on Bella's earlier words, too preoccupied with keeping clear of her and the sexual chemistry we seemed to share. Now that this heart of hers was literally staring me in the face, I had to know something about the girl... anything at all. It was fucking weird, but it just felt like... like I was supposed to.

But I didn't know how to ask.

"What do you know about her?" I managed to rasp.

"Know about who?"

"Maggie." Saying her name out loud cause some strange sensation to arise within me. I had no idea what to think of it.

"Oh. Uh, well..." She fidgeted nervously, looking over at my car as she chewed on her lip. "She was um... Um..."

"Spit it out, Bella."

"I uh... I mean..."

She was holding back for some reason, probably because she was seeing how unworthy I really was of this knowledge.

Well, fuck if I was going to stand here while she waited to figure out how to let me down easy.

"Never mind," I snapped at her.

It was a dick move, but I wrenched the baseball bat out of her hand and stalked off toward my Volvo, leaving her there to sputter behind me. I was so fucking pissed off, I could barely see straight as I made it over to my car, though I really didn't know why. It wasn't like I didn't already know I was shit, not like I hadn't expected it. It was inevitable. I'd waited for this moment since the day I met her.

But it didn't do anything to erase the sting.

I threw the bat as hard as I could out into the empty parking lot, watching it skitter across the expanse of the pavement before rolling to a stop at the edge of the grass.

Didn't feel a damn bit better.

"Edward!" Bella yelled from behind me. I could hear her steps coming closer, but refused to look at her. "What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing. Don't fucking worry with it."

"No. I will worry with it." She grabbed at my arm, jerking it so hard that she shocked me, and was able to twist me around to face her. "Stop being such a prick all the time and just talk to me!"

I huffed, unable to look at her. My blood boiled with rejection. I fucking despised it. "Get it the car. We're going home."

"Not until you tell me what the problem is."

I clenched my jaw, knowing the girl would literally stand here all night waiting for me to talk to her. Rain was supposed to move in later, and she'd get soaked. Then she'd get sick.

Son of a bitch.

"You don't want to tell me," I answered bitingly. "I get it. I wouldn't tell me either."

She laughed in disbelief. "You're joking, right?"

I kept silent, staring down at our feet.

"I want to tell you, Edward. Do you know how long I've wanted to tell you about her?"

"Then why don't you?" I seethed.

"Because I don't want you to hate me!" she shouted, and my eyes immediately shot to hers. "You're the first good thing that's ever happened to me, and I think—no, I know—if I tell you, then you'll hate me forever."

"I can't hate you, Bella. You're the only good thing that's ever happened to me." Not even my family, who I knew I loved without a shadow of a doubt, could compare to her.

She stumbled backward with my confession and hunched over, bracing herself with her hands on her thighs. "Don't say that," she breathed. "You don't know…"

"Why? It's fucking true. Can't you tell? You're the only thing I think about anymore!"

I couldn't see her face through the curtain of hair that fell around her, but I could see her back shake silently as she cried.

"Shit. I... I didn't mean to make you cry."

Christ, I had no clue what I was doing. Every time I turned around, I was doing something to upset her.

I should have just walked away right then.

"You didn't. It's me." She inhaled sharply. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have..."

I didn't know what it was that she shouldn't have done, because she never finished the sentence.

Nor did I ever make her. I simply stood there with her in the parking lot, berating myself for being such a goddamned idiot all of the time. This was still all so raw for Bella. Yet here I was, acting like a spoiled, petulant child demanding answers; answers she wasn't ready to give me yet. I was irrefutably the biggest, most selfish asshole on the planet.

Before I knew what I was doing, I had her in my arms. Something struck me as I pulled her against me. This girl made me strive to be a better person. No attempt at patching up those old wounds of mine had accomplished a fraction of what she had in just a month's time. And she hadn't even realized she was doing it; that was the most amazing part of it.

She simply was.

I led her to the car and sat her inside, murmuring shit I'd heard Carlisle say to Esme when she was upset about something. It seemed to help some; her sobs quieted down enough that I was comfortable with shutting the door and driving her home.

Nothing else was said as I drove back to Forks, and the chemistry between us that was always so fucking mind-bending seemed to have, thankfully, taken the night off. I wasn't sure I could handle that part of this whole fucked up relationship of ours too.

When we arrived back to town, I parked in the chief's driveway and leaned my head back against the seat, closing my eyes. I was so fucking tired all of a sudden. Staying awake tonight would prove to be challenging.

"I'm sorry," she eventually whispered, apparently running on fucking replay. "Maggie is... Was..."

She still couldn't find the words.

"Whatever it is can wait," I said sleepily. "I'm too… Fuck, I can't think straight right now."

She was quiet for a while, debating whether or not to do as I said. "Okay."

"Go inside and make sure your dad knows I got you home at a decent hour."

She giggled some, but it sounded so hollow. "Trying to impress him?"

"Fuck yes."

"Will you... Will you come back?"

"No. Yes. I-" I dragged my hands through my hair. "Let me think about it."

She nodded and put her hand on the door handle. "I had fun, Edward. Thank you."

She slipped out the door before I had a chance to realize how glad I was for that.

And was inside the house before I could tell her.

Long after I'd left Bella's, I found myself staring up at my ceiling in an effort to keep my eyes open. I slapped at my face the moment I felt my eyes start crossing with exhaustion. Pinched my arm when I got too relaxed. Splashed my face with cold water, played a video game for an hour, and listened to a few select songs on my iPod at eardrum-bursting levels.

Nothing was working.

I was going to fall asleep at some point tonight. Anxiety ripped through me with the thought, and I decided that if I wasn't going to be able to stop it then I didn't want to be alone. Maybe the warm body next to me would help dull some of those nightmares.

That was the theory, anyway.

I huffed and threw the covers off of my body, giving myself a second to make sure that what I was getting ready to do was actually what I wanted before I made my way to my closet and threw on something to wear.

I hurried downstairs and wrote Esme a bullshit note in case she were to wake up and notice I was gone, sliding it up under a magnet on the refrigerator and then making my way to my car.

The drive was short, not really giving me enough time to gather my thoughts or plan my words. I parked a few houses down and got out and manually locked the car so that the sound of the horn didn't wake the neighbors like it would if I'd have used the fob. I shoved my hands in my pockets along with my keys and started toward the tree that would take me to her.

The window was black against the white-sided house telling me that, unlike me, Bella was asleep. But I slithered up the tree regardless, my conscience screaming at me to turn away and leave.

Like I ever listened to the fucker.

The window was unlocked, exactly as I'd expected it to be. I crawled inside and landed on the balls of my feet, careful not to wake the sleeping girl in the bed before me. I went to her side and crouched down, grinding my teeth together so I didn't reach out and touch her. Wake her. Hear her voice. I didn't merely want this girl around me anymore. There was something that made me need her now, coming to life the second she broke down in front of me. I just knew I didn't deserve her. Not yet.

But I wanted to.

I gave in to the need to feel her skin against mine, not wanting to be the creepy fuck that watched some girl sleep without her knowing of his presence. Bella was a lighter sleeper than I'd anticipated, jumping awake the moment I cupped her face. She bolted upright and scrambled away from me, her eyes wild with fear.

"Damn it," I hissed, annoyed with myself.

She relaxed when she laid her eyes on me, letting out a gust of air as she sank back against the wooden headboard.

"I didn't think you were coming," she breathed.

I shrugged, staring down at the purple comforter that concealed her from me. Probably a good thing since I had a feeling that more than just the usual sliver of skin was exposed underneath it.

"Purple?" I finally asked. I'd wondered about it since the first time I'd been here.

Bella didn't seem the purple type.

"Charlie."

"Ah."

I fumbled with the edge of it for a while, not knowing exactly where to begin. Eventually, her hand grabbed at mine, halting my movements, and causing me to glance up at her nervously.

Her smile was warm... amused. Normally, it would have pissed me off, but with Bella... I just wanted to laugh at my absurdity.

"Fuck it," I muttered. "Here it is: I'm going back to therapy."

"Oh," she said, surprised by my admission. "Are you... okay?"

"No. I tell everyone I'm okay, but lately I've found that to be the farthest fucking thing from the truth possible."

Her fingers wound through mine.

"It happened when you got here," I continued.

"Am I supposed to apologize?" she asked, cocking her brow at me.

"No. I told you I'm fucked up."

She sighed and scooted a little closer to me. "You're you. I wouldn't want to spend so much time with you if you were someone else."

I scoffed.

"I thought that maybe it was... something else. And I guess at first it was. But now that I know you... I'd have wanted to be with you anyway."

I stopped breathing for a moment, memorizing the feeling of elation that pulsed through me.

"Do you have a specific place you want to go? I mean, I can't imagine Forks having many psychologists," she said uncertainly.

"Yeah. I've been thinking about going back for a while. It's in Seattle, where I want to go. Carlisle's found a decent shrink for me up there, and I figured that since I'll be heading to college there this fall-"

"I think it's a great idea, Edward. Really."

"Okay." I swallowed hard, forcing myself to continue. "I'm going for you."

"Me?" She blinked a few times. "Edward, why?"

"I want to deserve this," I answered quietly.

"You do," she said emphatically. "You so do."

I didn't want to waste my time arguing with her, so I changed the subject. "I have a um, a sort of proposition for you."

She laughed. "What's that?"

"The garage does this bullshit softball league every summer. Do it with us?"

"I don't know..."

"You'd be great at it, Bella. Rosalie's on it."

"And that would be why she dragged me to those batting cages in the first place. Sneaky bitch. She probably left thinking what a lost cause I was."

"Little does she know..."

"I might be able to hit, but I don't know the rules or anything," she admitted.

"We'll teach you."

She pursed her lips as she thought about it, and then finally nodded her head. "Yeah, okay. I can try."

I crouched there awkwardly beside her for a moment, not exactly sure how to tell her the real reason I'd come over.

"Edward."

I groaned. "I hate it when you do that shit, Bella."

"Do what?" she asked innocently.

"Read my mind."

She giggled sleepily, lying back and patting the side next to her. "You didn't come here just to ask me two things that could have waited until Monday."

I exhaled sharply.

"Get in and shut up."

I stood up and scowled as soon as I realized I'd be sleeping in jeans. I hadn't exactly thought this plan through when I'd left the house, which just showed how fucking tired I really was. I would have never let this shit slide if I'd been fully coherent.

"What now?" she mumbled.

"Nothing. It's nothing," I said, chewing on my cheek as I pulled back the covers. "Maybe I should just go over-"

"Edward," she said again. "Stop second guessing it. Just get in."

I grumbled obscenities under my breath but obeyed, actually getting the fucking nerve to climb under the covers with Bella this time.

She sighed and scooted down under the covers some more, closing her eyes with a hint of a smile. I gripped my side of the pillow, feeling her body heat radiate against me even more without the barrier of the purple quilt between us.

I swore all the blood left my extremities to gather in one, specific place...

She opened one eye to peek at me. "You okay?"

"Think I might have to get on top of the comforter again," I said tightly.

"I would really rather you didn't, because then I couldn't do this..."

She moved closer to me, laying her arm over my torso and placing her head on my shoulder. I froze beneath her, panic bubbling up in my chest. I was hard, and she was right next to me. One small shift of our bodies and she'd know. She'd feel exactly what she did to me, without even trying.

Oh. Holy. God.

My breaths grew sharper, and I squeezed my eyes closed in hopes of moving past it. This was Bella. She'd touched me countless times in the last few weeks, and I'd kissed her twice. She was just as affected by me as I was by her. This was nothing different. Not in the least.

Like hell it wasn't. This was the most intimate thing she'd ever done with me. It was casual, warm, trusting…

"What um… What book did you buy tonight?" I finally squeaked out, sounding just like a thirteen year old again.

Fuck.

"So now you want to know?" she asked on a yawn.

I growled a little in frustration; I'd already apologized.

"You get worked up so easily," she giggled. "I bought a compilation of Jane Austen works. I probably shouldn't have spent the money, but I wanted to read Pride and Prejudice again. I left my copy at my mom's in Phoenix."

"Austen," I repeated flatly. Never would have guessed that one.

"Mm-hmm. I love Mr. Darcy. You kind of remind me of him, actually."

My eyes shot down to the top of her head. In no fucking alternate universe did I resemble some pompous ass in breeches.

"You're nothing like I thought you'd be when I first met you. That first impression…" She trailed off, leaving me ready to beg to know the rest. "Well, I hated you. I hated everything about you."

The feeling was mutual.

She didn't say any more, which was just as well since I was getting sleepier by the second. My eyes grew heavy, and fear wormed its way inside me. I didn't know what I'd dream about this time… what memory would resurface and make me feel like that lost kid again. Fuck, I didn't want to sleep… Wanted to keep fighting it…

xxxx

I woke up to the sound of a door closing heavily. I pried my eyes open and looked around, letting them rest on the clock on Bella's bedside table. Four hours. I'd managed to sleep four hours dream free.

"Holy shit," I murmured. I moved so that I could see Bella and brought my hand up to push some of her hair off her face. I couldn't remember when the last time I'd managed to sleep and wake up to something other than the sickening feel of my memories, done something... normal.

Only I hadn't, really. Something had woken me up. Something in the hall...

I sucked in a startled breath just as my eyes darted over to the door, realizing Bella's father was out there. A thump sounded from the hallway, and if I had to guess, I'd say Chief Swan had tripped over something in the dark. And that the noise came from somewhere close to Bella's room.

He was coming this way.

"Fuck," I hissed, reaching up to Bella's shoulder to shake her awake. "Bella…"

I was answered with a groggy, "huh".

"Your dad. Bella, get up."

"Charlie's in his room," she muttered. "Asleep."

"No, he's not. Charlie's up," I returned. "And right outside the door."

She bolted upright and practically shoved me out the bed. "Go hide. Now."

I glanced around incredulously, trying to see any space in her tiny fucking room that I would fit in. "Where?"

"I don't know," she whispered harshly. "The closet?"

"Jesus fucking Christ. That cracker box?"

"You see someplace better?"

No.

I raked my hands through my hair and scurried across the room, opening her closet door and crouching down on the floor inside. As soon as I was out of sight, Bella's door squeaked, and a gasp came out of her mouth. I could hear the sound of the covers rustling, followed by Bella's frantic footsteps. A slight pause was followed by a grunt from Charlie.

"Daddy? Daddy, what's wrong?" Bella cried.

"Feel kind of… funny," he managed. "Dizzy."

There was another strange thump, this time I was able to deduce that it was the chief falling against the wall.

"Edward!"

The sound of Bella's terrified voice had me jumping out of the closet and racing to her in no time. Chief Swan's eyes grew huge, and his lips curled just as he slid down the wall.

"It's not what you think," I told him, kneeling down next to him.

"Sure. That's what they all say." He groaned a little. "Can't breathe."

"It's not," Bella swore. "I promise. And even if it were you wouldn't get to say anything about it. I'm nineteen."

"My house," he countered.

"Dad, stop talking. We can argue over it later."

He threw his head back against the wall. He was pale and sweaty, and I would bet my worthless life he was nauseated and had a racing pulse.

But I couldn't bring myself to touch him to find out.

Bella's hands ran over her father's body frantically. She sniffled once, and then looked over at me.

Her eyes were brimming with tears.

"Edward, what do I do?"

"Got any aspirin?"

She nodded as she wiped at her nose.

"Get it," I said calmly. "Now."

She nodded again and ran out of the room, leaving me to the chief on my own. I yanked my phone out of my pocket and dialed for an ambulance, remembering all the time I'd spent shadowing Carlisle my senior year in high school. This is what I wanted to do. Fix someone just like Charlie. Save them. Make them like new again.

It was exhilarating having the knowledge to tell the dispatcher exactly what was going on beneath the skin. Finally doing something worthwhile. For someone worthwhile.

Now if I could just fucking examine him like an actual doctor...

"Ever seen someone have a heart attack?" I asked the chief as I hung up the phone.

"Yeah. After they went unconscious."

"Well, this is what it looks like before. You feel like you had heartburn earlier this evening?"

His eyes widened. "I thought it was... Shit."

Shit was right.

"I missed all the signs. Signs I studied every day Bella was in that hospital in Phoenix. They had posters... everywhere."

"Most people do," I told him.

Bella practically fell into the room with the bottle of aspirin. She shoved it at me with a shaking hand, her eyes darting over to Charlie again.

I got out one of the small, white pills and handed it to Chief Swan. "Chew it. Slowly."

He did as instructed, his face scrunching up as the bitter taste of the pill hit his tongue.

"Ambulance is on its way," I murmured, risking a glance over at Bella.

The look on her face was like taking a knife to the chest.

"What?" Bella shrieked.

"He's having a heart attack." A broken sob came pouring out of her mouth just as the faint sound of sirens found my ears. "He's okay, Bella. He'll be fine. You need to pack some things, though... your meds."

She nodded once, her hand covering her mouth and tears streaming down her face.

"Go greet the paramedics at the door."

She didn't budge.

"Bella!" I shouted, causing her eyes to whip over to me. "Paramedics. Let them in."

"Oh!" she gasped. "Right. Okay."

I could hear her feet pound at the stairs as she rushed to meet them, but stared at Chief Swan the whole time.

"What are you doing with her?" he asked roughly.

"No idea," I answered honestly. "None at all."

He grunted once. "Wrong answer, kid."

I wasn't going to try to deny that.

"I'll really be all right?" he whispered, his brown eyes fearful.

"You're not one of those poor, unconscious bastards, are you?" I retorted.

His lips twitched behind his mustache, and I couldn't help but think that maybe he didn't dislike me as much as I'd thought.

Although, I certainly hadn't won any fucking points by sneaking into Bella's room to begin with.

"No," he answered slowly. "I'm definitely not."

"You're definitely not," I agreed. "You'll be fine, sir."

There was a flurry of activity as the paramedics came barreling through the house. They got Chief Swan packaged on the stretcher and loaded him up into the ambulance. Bella was… Well, she was panicked. Understandably so. And I had no idea what to do for her.

Actually, that wasn't exactly true.

I grabbed my phone and punched in the number I was so familiar with, waiting impatiently for my father to pick the damned thing up.

"Edward?" Carlisle asked in greeting. "It's four in the morning. Where are you?"

"Bella's."

Silence.

"I'll explain later. The chief… Shit, Dad, he had an MI."

I could hear movement on the other side of the line. "What? How bad?"

"He's… He's okay," I managed. "I think. I need… I mean, I need you to…"

"I'm getting dressed now. I'll contact the cardiologist on call and explain the situation. I'm sure I'll have no problems getting into that OR."

I exhaled in relief. "Thanks. Bella's… important to me. So by extension…"

"So is Charlie," he finished for me.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Nothing," he said soothingly. "Just take care of Bella."

"I can do that."

Carlisle chuckled. "I'll see you soon."

I shoved my pocket and started looking around for Bella, finding her shoving giant orange prescription bottles into a small, black bag. She was muttering something strange… sounding a bit like-

"I fucking hate irony," she spat as she zipped up her bag. Her eyes were fierce when they found mine, no trace of the panicked girl that I'd seen earlier.

I didn't know what to say, so I just nodded. She dragged in a shaky breath and started toward the door.

"He has to be okay, Edward. He just has to," she said, letting the door slam shut in my face as she walked outside.

I hurriedly opened it and ran over to her. I grabbed the bag from her and took her arm, leading her over to where she'd parked her truck earlier.

"Keys," I requested, putting out my hand.

"What?"

"You're not driving like this." I tried to make some kind of comforting motion or expression or… something. I was pretty sure I failed. "I'll take you."

"Thank you," she whispered, a tear streaking down her face.

The cool metal hit my palm, and I smiled a little with how easy my words came when before they'd been so hard to say. "You're welcome. Now let's go. I want to make sure you're in the right place when Carlisle comes to talk to you."

"Carlisle?" she asked in surprise. "Your dad, Dr. Cullen, Carlisle?"

"I called him earlier. I didn't know what else to-"

My words were stopped by the way she enveloped me in her arms, clinging to me and cutting off my circulation and the air in my lungs…

She didn't speak for a while, and when she did, her voice was thick and rough with tears. "I don't know what I'd have done without you here."

"Yes, you do. You'd have done everything I did."

"No, I- Maybe." She inhaled deeply, readying herself to go. "Drive how you want. I'll close my eyes. Just get me there as quick as you can."

Like I'd have done anything else.

Next week's update is beta'd and ready to go. So I reiterate: don't kill me ;)