]AN: Sorry about the lack of Johnlock lately – I got distracted by Molstrade...
But here's a special Xmas chapter to celebrate the holiday season - Enjoy!
Disclaimer – I don't own Sherlock Holmes. John Watson has that honor.
3:05
I don't want a lot for Christmas; there is just one thing I need, I don't care about the presents, underneath the Christmas tree...
SH
3:06
Um – Sherlock? Are you alright?
JW
3:07
Of course John. I deduced when you left that you were going Xmas shopping. Just wanted to let you know that - I don't want a lot for Christmas, There is just one thing I need, and I don't care about the presents, underneath the Christmas tree...
SH
3:08
Right. Okay. Have you got a secret stash that I don't know about or something?
JW
3:10
No. I just wanted to say - I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know
Make my wish come true, all I want for Christmas is you...
SH
3:11
Seriously Sherlock, what the hell are you on about? Have you been talking romance advice from online forums again?
JW
3:12
My god – has he really done that before? How do you cope?
SH
3:14
WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS GOING ON?!
JW
3:17
John, ignore every message you've received before this one. Lestrade nicked my phone and impersonated me via text. He was making a ghastly attempt to be amusing and clever.
SH
3:19
Greg? What's he doing there?
JW
3:21
Lestrade, came by to drop off some cold-case files for me to follow up on. He took my phone off the coffee table when I was reviewing one of them.
SH
3:22
Oh – that makes a lot more sense. Okay – I feel better now.
JW
3:23
What did he send you?
SH
3:24
Scroll back through your text history and see for yourself.
JW
3:26
Finish up the Xmas shopping quickly.
SH
3:27
Why? And thinking on it – how did he know that's where I was?
JW
3:28
I told him of course. Because Lestrade will soon need your medical attention.
SH
3:29
Don't be stupid – he's got a gun. He'll use it.
JW
3:30
As do I.
SH
3:31
Keep your hands of my pistol!
JW
3:31
Never had a problem with it before...
SH
3:32
I've always had a problem with it – You just never listen.
JW
3:33
Fine. I can easily disarm him anyway.
SH
3:33
Just take it down a notch alright? No reason to throw a fit.
JW
3:34
No. You can't see his smug laughter. Idiot's falling all over himself...
SH
3:35
Well it was pretty funny...
JW
3:36
Really? Because you seemed completely unnerved by it.
SH
3:37
I was – it's completely unlike you. In hindsight it's funny though.
JW
3:38
It is not amusing. At all. Ever!
SH
3:39
It is too. And you've nicked his stuff so often you've no right to complain.
JW
3:39
I've never impersonated him.
SH
3:40
We both know that's not true.
JW
3:40
Fine – I've never impersonated him for the sake of amusement at his expense.
SH
3:41
I'll grant you that – but it's no big deal. We both know it's all untrue and that it was a joke. It won't leave the three of us – alright?
JW
3:42
Wrong.
SH
3:43
About what?
JW
3:42
It's not entirely untrue.
SH
3:43
Okay...
JW
3:43
Though I would never express it in such disgustingly sentimental terms, I do agree with the basic meaning.
SH
3:44
Really?
JW
3:44
Do you really find it hard to believe that I put more value upon your presence and affection that material goods?
SH
3:45
No – Just never thought I'd hear you say it.
JW
3:45
You haven't and you won't. We're texting.
SH
3:46
Quarrelsome twat...
JW
3:46
That's a big word for you John...
SH
3:47
You're a colossal pain sometimes...
JW
3:47
Love you too
SH
3:48
Unfortunately for me...
JW
3:48
Funny – that's the exact same thing I think when you say you love me...
SH
3:49
:P
JW
3:49
You can't come up with a better response than that?
SH
3:50
Don't need to. It's simple and effective
JW
3:51
More like childish and immature...
SH
3:52
Well I've to use language you can relate to...
JW
3:54
I'll admit – That was marginally clever.
SH
3:54
Love you too.
JW
3:56
Fortunately for me...
SH
3:57
:D. Be home in a bit
JW
3:57
Pick up Chinese?
SH
3:58
Sure
JW
3:58
And a body bag?
SH
3:59
Sherlock...
JW
4:00
Joking...
SH
If convenient please review; if inconvenient review anyway.
KP