*short chapter*

*for the record: i have not EVER been an actual writer for the actual show Faking It. Now. With that being said. I would neverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr write this backstory and then have Karma hook back up with Liam. that ship. has sailed. The show would do it. i would not. big difference.*

*the last chapter was all about karma seeing something in liam, perhaps that he had finally forgiven himself for what he did to her or at the very least he accepted the fact that he fucked up their marriage and her life. when you go through years trying to find love in a relationship that has lost love any sign of love is intense and tragic (a reminder of what you used to be or thought you could be, a reminder of why or where it all started). karma wants to be able to be friends with liam. that's all that was. she doesn't want him to be able to just leave and never see her again. he's meant too much to her for too long to be able to just exit her life like that. and in a way karma knows that liam doesn't really want to live with this scar. they're at a place of forgiveness and reconciliation. it's a huge deal. plus they're both at the point where they see how harmful their jobs have been to their own mental health. it's hard to feel good about what you do when you're not really helping the people who deserve to be helped. they have a wealth of money but barely any satisfaction with work. so it's this whole situation they'll either rectify or agree to part from.*

*also, shane is mostly neutral in this world. liam and him are obviously best friends but in this world after having spent YEARS working close with karma he really cares about her and loves her as a friend so i don't see him being "on liam's side" or anything like that. he's worried about her he just doesn't want to actually work so those two things contradict a little but it's just how he is (aka pretty selfish). if karma insisted on taking a week off too shane would agree that she needs to take time off and they'd work it out, that sort of thing. at this point their firm is running so smoothly they could delay cases for an entire year and hardly see a repercussion they'd be affected by. they are richer than rich and so famous they could drop out of law for 50 years and still have an easy time coming back and making news and money. karma works a lot but she does it because it's easier to her than saying no. and stop. and why. it's easier for her to work than to think about her life. she's buried herself in it because of how sad she is. and we've reached a point where amy is waking her up from all that and reminding her that she needs to live for herself and stop being everyone's slave.*

Chapter 20

Hold Me, Please

Amy's morning was stress free when she finally came to.

It didn't seem so odd to her anymore, the whole "i love you," incident. In fact, it only seemed sweet. Amy just tried not to put stock into it. She didn't want to get her hopes up if they were just going to have to fall back down.

It was weird though… She loved her too.

Lauren called her at around 7:20. She asked her where she was and if she came home. Amy lied and said she was getting donuts. She said she went to see some movie at the drive-in, she knew Lauren would rather die than see this movie, and then she stayed to watch the piece of crap that played right after it.

It was rather easy to lie to Lauren and feel no guilt. Amy's life was usually pretty boring. Why Lauren would assume any different was beyond her.

But Lauren was still skeptical, she knew that something had happened with Karma and that Amy was thinking things that she wasn't quite sharing and that worried her but it came out as skepticism laced in anger.

Shane texted Lauren RIGHT after breakfast and they both met up so that Shane could completely gossip about how odd the whole breakfast thing was and about how badass Karma was when she gave Liam that ultimatum.

Lauren was texting Amy all about the new developments while Amy impatiently waited for Karma at home and felt worried for her with every new detail. She was on the couch in Karma's apartment trying not to breath as loud and hard as she was breathing. Thinking about Karma being stressed out was actually stressing her out.

The view up there in the day was lovely but it wasn't the same as it had been in the night with Karma pressed against her. When she had first woken up Amy found some comfy clothes that Karma probably only wore to relax in or go to the gym. A pair of almost tight-fitting black sweatpants and a crop top that showed her midriff and looked almost like a cartoon shirt, she was too impatient to rummage and she didn't want to be rude. She pulled the items out quickly and threw them on just to be decent.

When Karma finally came home she wasn't in the good mood she had left with.

"Karma?" Amy had gotten up to greet her and Karma had smiled at the sight but then her face dropped because she was too sad to feel happy. No matter how happy she was about Amy she still had to deal with this whole death of her other self thing she had going on. "Shit, what happened?" Amy asked, taking a step forward and catching Karma in her arms and hugging her tight.

Karma had spent so long in the parking lot of that diner trying to stop herself from being said. Then she had to speed off so that Shane and Liam wouldn't see her and know what she'd done. Then she had to park somewhere and try and control herself again when the tears were flooding her eyes and preventing her from being safe on the road. Then finally she made it home but she felt ridiculous for all the crying and then that made her cry too.

Needlesstosay she spent a lot of time in the hotel parking lot trying to make it look like she hadn't just been crying her life away. Eventually she got up the balls to go back to the front of the hotel and let the valet take her car away.

The elevator was difficult. She pressed the button several times and tried to hold herself together so that when she saw Amy she could pretend it was all just fine.

The second she saw her though. Instant pride, joy, and then sadness quickly came.

She fell into Amy's arms and began to wail.

"It's okay," Amy said, holding her. "It's okay."

Amy held her a while, holding her face and kissing her hair. Eventually she thought Karma must be tired so she led her back to her room and got her to lay down and she held her while she cried a little lighter and stayed quiet about all that had gone on.

It all made Amy nervous but she was happy that she could be there for her.

Lauren was texting her nonstop, giving her all the missing details, but Amy was too wrapped up in Karma to even think about checking her phone.

Amy held her and laid up on her pillows feeling sorry for the life Karma was leading and sorry that she hadn't somehow found her sooner. She kissed her forehead and made sweet noises because she loved the feel of her skin on her lips and her body in her arms. She loved that she could be there for her and hold her and become part of her life and so quickly, so soon.

At one point, Karma felt so completely held that she drifted off to sleep.

Once Amy noticed she let out a small laugh and knew that she really did love her.