Author's note:
Hello there! Kaemisa here.
I've had a lot of doubts about starting this story, for multiple reasons.
The first one, the obvious one, is the fear that I'll lose the motivation or time I need to write. It has happened to all my fan-fictions so far, so it has physically stopped me from trying to write anything new. Health Care studies really are time hungry, huh?
Secondly, a fan-fiction implies some quality in the work of innovation brought to an already existing world. But, let's face it: I have nowhere near the creativity or talent of Hajime Isayama, both in imagination or simply quality of my texts. Writing anything about such a well done and deep story makes me feel like a fraud.
But! I wrote a chapter already, and I might as well publish it, and see how it goes. Maybe I'll continue, maybe it'll end up deleted like all my other dozens of fan-fictions that disappeared overnight!
I might need to give you a few warnings, though:
- The story may have inconsistencies. I do not master SnK's lore in the slightest.
- Character may seem OC from their original counterparts.
- Comments are appreciated, though it'd be nice if insults could be avoided! No need to warn me of my poor writing: I'm completely aware!
With that, I hope you'll at least enjoy the read. Have a nice time, and I hope a wonderful day!
"Hey, kid!"
"Sir!"
"Who the hell are you?"
"I'm Armin Arlert from Shiganshina, Sir!"
Annie didn't even bother trying to take a glance at the boy their commander decided to yell at this time. He had been handpicking every child that looked slightly normal, and badmouthed them until their egos were broken in pieces. A method she was familiar with, after all, not that she needed much ego to have broken in the first place.
Still, she would have thought having the Paradis' demons get trashed around by their own kind would bring at least a slight warmth to her cold heart, but it didn't do much. After two years of roaming through these lands, meeting various kinds of people, and tracking down the Coordinate… She had realised people weren't demons.
That wouldn't stop her from continuing her mission, of course. She wouldn't exactly say she felt any sense of remorse, either. Their lives may be miserable, but back in Marley, their living conditions weren't stellar either. In the end, this whole story had no villains or good guys, just humans trying to survive.
Which was why this boy didn't hold any of her interest. If after living through Shiganshina, the place they destroyed first, he still had eyes soft enough for the commander to pick on him, then he was a fool. A primitive and unfair judgement, but one she allowed herself to make regardless.
And, besides, she couldn't tell why, but she felt unsafe enough to be analysing every person that slightly passed next to her. After those years living as a normal person, their identities were pretty much guaranteed as impossible to pierce, unless they made a mistake themselves.
So, why did she feel like something… No, that someone was watching every little step she took, every gesture she made? It had been that way ever since they had reached this location, and it sure wasn't disappearing.
Had someone overheard the two idiots she had breached the walls with talk? Were their identities compromised? If so, she'd have to silently murder that person before they could even utter a word to anyone. Even if something as insignificant as the seeds of a rumour sprouted, everything would be over before they could uproot it.
Instead, to ease her worries, she continued her staring battle.
A slightly odd fight, especially for her. But, it eased her mind a little, and she had found the ideal partner.
After all, that boy in front of her had eyes that screamed that he was broken. In fact, he was beyond broken, and more like the shadow of what probably used to be a human. A shame, for she was sure those beautiful green eyes used to shine like the most beautiful jewellery she couldn't even dream of being able to afford back in marley.
If she was looking at him, he was looking through her.
It didn't take a genius to know where that boy was from. But she didn't even feel a tinge of guilt: after all, even if they put him through hell, it was for the greater good of humanity, wasn't it?
Oh, was it their turn already? She could see Shadis approaching them. Just as he passed between the two, for a brief second, she saw the boy's eyes move, almost startling her. It followed the commander until he found a new victim.
For the brief seconds his emerald pupils weren't on her, she felt… free. Like the burden she had been carrying since arriving had been lifted.
Then, just as swiftly as they had moved, they focused back on her.
And just like that, that ominous feeling was back. Her body stiffened with fear, for her trained mind couldn't understand how that boy could have such an effect on her. She almost gasped, but she put all her strength in her jaw to avoid such a reaction. Maybe she unconsciously shivered, she couldn't tell.
What she knew, however, was that she was wrong. He had never stared through her, but at her from the very beginning. And if he saw her reaction, his body remained unchanged, his face as closed as before, and his eyes remained broken.
She was the first to break eye contact. But that uneasy feeling remained until the very end of that strange welcoming ceremony.
As the group of trainees hurried toward their barracks, in a hurry to choose a bed and eat something, bar of course the poor girl that would be running laps until she collapsed, unlike the others, Annie took as much time as she could to stay behind.
When the rite of passage had ended, the boy in front of her had left without a glance behind him. Just like before, the blonde girl's foggy mind became clear again, and she let out a sigh she didn't even know she was holding.
If she was rational, she knew he couldn't know about her other form, or her original land. They had seen themselves: this place had no mentions of what was outside these walls. The word island wasn't even mentioned anywhere. People were that clueless.
He was a scary kid, that she had no doubts. He might be a danger to them once he finished his training, but he couldn't do anything before, right?
That was what her rational thoughts were. Now, for her gut feeling, the one that never betrayed her:
He knew it all. And it didn't only feel like he knew she was an outsider - no, he even seemed to know everything down to her Titan, her condition, her past. Though, she'd obviously stay rational. There weren't any reasons for her to confront him, and besides, he seemed just as cold towards other people.
Looking at him from a distance, she could see him ignore that black-haired girl that was sticking to him like glue, before going to the boys' barrack. If he was eager to choose his bed, then his body language hadn't changed in the slightest.
Would Reiner and Bertolt be alright? She couldn't know. Maybe he really had no knowledge of their group, and he was just a creep that stared at her because she was pretty?
What a joke. She just hoped they wouldn't do anything harsh to him if he stared at them like he did to her.
She made her ways to the barracks as well. As the other girls in the dorm all presented themselves to each other, she simply told her name and chose a bed. There, she lied down for a few hours. Fortunately, the day was mostly a day off so the trainees could get to know each other before their hellish training would start.
It allowed her to collect her thoughts about everything, answering with the shortest sentences she could make whenever she was asked a question about her life. She repeated the lies she invented years ago, about how her entire family died after the breach of the third wall, and how she sneaked on a ship to escape. Those lies were so horrible nobody ever questioned them, and the other girls reacted like that as well.
And soon, dinner time came around. She had managed to grasp the personalities of all her dorm occupants for the next three years, so she'd be fine on that. As for the weird guy she didn't have the name for, she just decided she wouldn't do anything about it as of now. With new clothes that were more comfortable, she exited the dorm and made her way to the dinner area.
She couldn't stop her from looking at that brown-haired girl that was still running around the field. The fact she was still standing was a miracle in itself - it was obvious she did have some pretty good physical abilities. Another person she had to be careful of.
She entered the dining area with an indifferent expression. A quick look through the room gave her all the information she wanted to have: her two teammates were seated a few tables down the hall, while the strange boy, with that same black-haired girl she had seen him leave with, was on the table just on her left.
She walked up to the other warriors' table. She sat quietly, Reiner giving her a plate with some bread and what seemed like soup without a word. She thanked him with a grateful nod, trying to keep track of the conversations going around her.
Nothing too special. Plus, her eyes kept going back to the table where that guy was. Now that she looked closer, she could also see that blonde guy that was from Sheganshina talking to him. The black-haired kid wasn't responding, staring silently at the table, his food untouched.
Was he that traumatised by the Titan breach? She could understand how terrifying it must have been, but if that weakling in front of him was still feeling good enough to talk so fast, then she couldn't really see the invasion being his only source of torments.
Though, that black-haired girl next to him. Mikasa? She couldn't really remember, as she had been lost in her thoughts through the dorm's presentation. She was sitting next to him, mimicking his expression, though she was throwing him worried glances every now and then. Did that guy get in trouble recently?
"Hey, Reiner. Do you know who those guys are?" she asked quietly, pointing with the tip of her nose to their table. After a silent glance on his part, and a negative nod, he answered.
"The blond one is Armin Arlert, that I remember, since he's from Shiganshina. The girl didn't have a presentation, and I haven't talked to her, so I don't know. As for the other guy, no idea either. He just threw his stuff on a bed, and left without a word. He showed up like ten minutes ago."
That… was too suspicious. Her gut feeling about him kept getting stronger. It was their duty to keep track of every single person in their promotion, as information was the key of war, but that guy she needed more of.
Suddenly, she shivered internally.
Why was she even focusing so hard on him? Yes, he had a weird gaze. Yes, he seemed pretty odd. Hell, she'd admit that yes, she found him scary. But why had she first thought about him knowing her identity? What made him so different?
"Hey, Armin!" she heard another guy yell.
She snapped back to reality, staring intensely at the guy that had gotten up and gone to the blonde boy, who was nervously staring at the newcomer.
"Uh-Yeah?" he responded hesitantly.
"You're from Shiganshina, right?"
Questions about the invasion. Good. If she could learn anything about their trio, it'd make her life tremendously easier.
"Right…"
"Then, did you see it? The colossus Titan?!"
Well, that guy was clueless. Annie expected at least a little of subtility, but it seemed he was dead set on embarrassing himself. However, even if the question was out of place, and completely shameless, everyone in the room had quieted down, listening with rapt attention.
"I did see it…"
"Really?! How big was it?!"
"If you want an accurate description, we saw the top of its head from over the wall. It seemed like it had no skin, and only layers of muscles, though it did have a pretty big mouth. Its hand even squeezed the top of the wall, making cracks on it…"
He still remembered all of those details? With a sideway glance at Bertolt, who had slightly stiffened, Annie knew he'd be observing that guy from up close. It was better to keep track of the resident analyst, than to get on its bad side.
"That's crazy! And the armoured Titan, that broke through wall Maria?!"
"I didn't see it from very close, but it just looked like a normal Titan with some thick plates on its body…"
"A normal Titan? Then what do the regular ones look like?!"
A deafening silence settled. The blonde boy was doing its best to stop being the centre of attention. He was blatantly staring at his two friends, hoping either of them would get him out of his misery. Unfortunately for him, both were staring at the table like the blonde didn't exist.
"I-I can't really tell… I only saw the colossus and armoured well…"
At that moment, the target of Annie's eyes finally decided to move. The black-haired boy got up, grabbing his food, which was still untouched.
"Mikasa, please bring some water with you," and with that, before anyone said a thing, he left with his food, not even sparing a look back. Murmurs started, and a second after, Armin followed after them like a lost puppy, with the sole purpose of escaping more questions.
After a minute, people had settled back in their seats, and Annie's curiosity, which had only been growing until now, remained unsatisfied.
"I'll go first," she told the two boys, not bothering with good night wishes. They could piss themselves in their sleep for all she cared. Her sole objective, as of now, was to find what that guy was up to.
A bad method. Why would a spy take an interest in a foreign boy that she would, sooner or later, have him killed? She couldn't care less. She wouldn't be satisfied until she was sure that boy was simply a normal creep that had troubles displaying emotions.
She thought she'd have to track him down, but fortunately for her, answers were a few metres away, in the form of a sweating and barely standing girl feasting on the food she was pretty sure that guy had brought outside. Armin and Mikasa were seated next to her, making sure she wouldn't have food getting in her lungs, with how fast she was shoving everything down her throat.
That guy still wasn't there, though. His way of always slipping away slowly started to get on her nerves.
"Where'd that guy go?" she asked the seated trainees, who all raised their eyes at him.
"You mean Eren? I think he already went to sleep," replied Armin, nodding to himself, as if he wasn't really sure. The black-haired girl just stared down at her, unfazed by the question.
Well, if he went to the barracks, he was out of reach for her then. It left a bad taste in her mouth, but what could she really do?
Eren… For some reason, it felt like she hated that name already.
"First, I'm going to check your aptitude! All you have to do is attach a rope to your hips and dangle, scum!"
Annie paid no mind to whatever Shadis was saying. No training could be worse than what she already went through in Marley. She'd make it seem like at first, staying up would give her trouble, so she wouldn't be the main target of attention, to slowly come to an unmoving state. That way, she cleared the exercise, nice and easy.
"Keep your balance with the full belt on! Those who can't do this aren't even fit to use as bait! I'll send you to a settlement!"
And with those final gentle words, the trainees were sent to their fate. She watched most of them fail more or less miserably, with a few exceptions that remained rather straight, including that running girl from the day before.
Then, there was that Mikasa girl. Annie watched her closely, as the girl took off from the ground, and remained upright the whole time. She received various looks of envy from people all around her, but the blonde couldn't care less. Her whole attention was on the guy that would just have its turn just after Mikasa.
After a few minutes of uselessly dangling in the air, Shadis ordered Mikasa to get down. His eyes turned to Eren, and as the boy stepped forward to get attached, Annie couldn't help but wonder why the Commander had decided to come observe himself how the child would fare.
The response was given a few seconds later, when just like his friend, Eren remained stable on the suspension machine, without as much as a shiver. Shadis' posture stiffened as seconds passed, not even bothering to hide what the blonde warrior thought was… disappointment?
"Yeager."
"Sir," the boy replied in the most monotonous voice imaginable.
"Get down and take your equipment off. Kirstein! Take Yeager's things and get up that thing!"
By now, everyone was openly staring at the commotion, which eased the girl's mind. At least, she could now stare without anyone thinking she was weird.
She watched closely as that guy, Jean, she remembered, approached, grabbing Eren's equipment with gritted teeth. He had already managed to hold onto the ropes, and everyone was wondering why the commander would ask him to go back up after his already brilliant performance.
Confusion grew when, just after getting up in the air, Jean rolled over himself and finished the exercise facing the dirt. Gasps of surprise escaped some trainees' mouths, while a few snickered at the sight of one of their best members getting downed.
"What the-...!" Jean barely managed to say.
"So, Yeager, it seemed like you were wielding a defective engine. Weren't you aware?" Shadis said darkly, though Annie felt like he was talking to the green-eyed boy more softly than to other teenagers.
"No, Sir."
Annie couldn't really tell if he was lying or truthful. That tone of his left no room for emotions.
"That's why I hate prodigies like you. You could have died swinging thirty metres above the ground and we'd only know your equipment was sabotaged after inspecting your pathetic splashed corpse."
Sabotaged? There was no way the boy had missed that word. But just like before, his body language remained as unexpressive and unsurprised as possible.
"Sorry, Sir."
"Get everything changed by tomorrow. If you want to die that badly, go get eaten by a Titan or something. I am not interested in washing your blood off my training camp."
"Yes, Sir."
As slowly, the crowd dispersed, and despair soon overtook the soldiers as the Commander started to insult them one by one for failing. Everything went back to a sense of normalcy…
Except for Annie.
Eren Yeager… Jäger… 'Hunter'.
Now that she had his full name, she hated him even more. She hated coincidences, and she wouldn't believe such a guy had that many ones around him.
Her eyes opened as quickly as they could.
She had never gotten such a… vivid dream.
She felt numb. Why was she lying down just like she had been sleeping? Technically, she was still sleeping. Then why did this not feel like a dream?
She didn't know what that was, where she was, or her mind was thinking, but the sky was beautiful. Stars aligned in the dark sky of the night, with blue reflects that made it almost look like lost lights sinking into the abyss. What looked like… aurora borealis? She couldn't tell because she had never seen any, but trails of green light were following themselves above her. She just remained in that position for a few minutes, lost in the beauty of her surroundings.
"Are you done?"
She felt something slide off her clothes as she got up in a hurry, only for her to realise everything around her was made of sand. Dunes, like a desert, were the only things in sight.
And in the distance in front of her, was a massive tree of light she couldn't tell how she had missed. What she thought were aurora borealis were only the branches of that pillar of light, dozens, hundreds, or thousands of them that left from either the main trunk or from other core branches that divided themselves.
She would marvel for ages if all of this was a dream, and her brain had the capacity of creating something so beautiful. She wished she could stay in that peaceful atmosphere forever. However, she also knew her brain would certainly never make a dream as good as this while including the person she disliked the most at the moment.
Just in front of the tree, a few metres in front of her, stood Eren Yeager. That's when she realised she was in her sleeping clothes, while he was in some regular ones. So, she was indeed sleeping, but all of this wasn't a dream, right?
Her eyes met his, and that uneasy feeling came back. In the past few days, he had stopped looking at her altogether, and her memory had been eager to forget that bone-chilling sensation. The cold, scary stare of his made her knees shake, specially in that environment that seemed to suit him so well.
She couldn't explain it, but she felt like a peasant trespassing on the lord's domain.
"You're slow. Weren't you warriors trained to think fast?" he asked with disdain.
For the first time, she could read emotions in his eyes: flames of hatred that burned like an inferno. In that place where there was no other living being than the two eldians, he had finally dropped the mask and displayed what he really thought.
Though she guessed his hatred was justified.
"How did you find out?" she asked him with the icy stare she had created herself.
"Always knew," he replied with a cruel smile. Annie couldn't tell if she preferred his emotionless fake persona to that blatant dislike he showed her. "Not that you could have changed a thing. I knew before the training camp even started."
"As if I was supposed to believe that," the blonde woman continued. She looked at her hand, to notice her ring was still there. As long as she had it, she could transform into her Titan easily. "But to use your own words, it's not that you could have changed a thing anyway."
She gained her own cruel smile as his own disappeared.
Was she supposed to feel bad for mocking a guy that had probably lost it all in Shiganshina? It probably explained his behaviour, and all of that was partially her fault.
And yet, she only felt satisfaction at his retracted expression.
Until it wasn't a smirk that appeared on his face, but a proud grin, followed by maniac laughter that iced her veins.
"Good, very good! As I thought, I won't have to feel bad when I will kill you all!" he told her with a genuinely happy face. Somehow, it was far more scary than his cold mask.
"Try that, bastard," the words passed through her gritted teeth. To that, he only pointed at her with his hand, his grin still as big as it could be.
"Come to the forest near the training camp, where we're supposed to start training with the ODM gear. If you don't, I'll make sure that father of yours suffers the worst possible fate!"
Before she could answer, she saw him snap his fingers.
She woke up abruptly, hitting her head on the bed above her. Fortunately, it seemed like nobody woke up from the loud noise and her short cry of pain and surprise.
She sat on the edge of her bed, her eyes wide open.
He knew about her father. How? It wasn't possible at all. Even if he had overheard their true loyalty through a mistake of Reiner and Bertolt, there was no way those two would have said a word about the oldest Leonhart.
'He wasn't bluffing. Shit.' She thought, getting up in a hurry. Putting on the bare minimum of clothes, she left the barracks, making sure nobody saw her. She ran to the forest as fast as she could, toward the presence she felt, as if Eren was somehow using a trick for her to locate his position easily.
Even that vivid world he had spoken to her through, she couldn't help but wonder what kind of power it was. She only saw one answer, that made her blood boil:
The Coordinate. Somehow, that boy was the king of the walls, or at least had obtained the Titan of the king. If she could kidnap him, or even eat him, whatever, as long as she retrieved his Titan, she could go back to her father.
It didn't take long for her to reach the destination she was guided to. And unsurprisingly, Eren stood there, sitting on a big boulder, staring at the sky.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Eren told her, though his gaze was kept on the shining stars. "Watching the night sky was one of my mother's favourite activities. It's unfortunate she can never stargaze ever again."
He jumped from the rock, staring at her. His eyes expressed real joy, a real sense of happiness of what Annie guessed was the thought of killing her.
"Too bad indeed. You're next, Yeager!"
She had no plans on dragging this out, she'd transform, eat him, then leave. When the following morning, the other warriors would notice her and Eren's absence, they'd understand she had captured or eaten him, and would escape as well.
They could even stay behind for all she cared.
Immediately, she deployed the hidden blade in her finger. Eren's eyes followed the movements of her hand, as she cut her finger so deeply blood spouted from the wound. Annie grinned at him, as she felt the sharp pain in her hand.
A second passed.
Another…
But nothing happened.
'Huh…?'
She stared at her hand in confusion, wondering why she wasn't suddenly transforming. In fact, she couldn't feel a single change in her body.
Panic overtook her mind. With an abrupt movement, she continued to dig the blade in her hand, until it was an open mound of flesh. And yet, nothing happened.
"What's happening Leonhart, can't shift in your Titan form?!"
She looked in front of her, only to take a direct hit to her face, as Eren had used the time she had used shredding her hand to gap close on her and punch her in the head. She stumbled backwards, but she couldn't react as he tackled her to the ground with violence she hadn't even felt in Marley's training camp.
By the time she understood the situation, he had already climbed on her chest, blocking her under him, as he grinned savagely at the face of the panicked blond-haired girl. She tried to wiggle as best as she could, even throwing punches his way, but he dodged it all successfully, replying with his own punches, and maintaining his ground.
Titans affected human forms. She didn't know why, but it seemed the Coordinate made him significantly stronger than a normal boy of his age. She wasn't even sure Reiner had that much strength.
Soon, she was barely conscious. After being repeatedly hit in the face, and struggling to breathe with the full weight of the boy on her chest, fatigue overtook her body. In under a minute, she was out of this fight.
Pinned under Eren, who by now was laughing at her after trapping her arms under his, she started to cry. Tears left the corners of her eyes, eyes that glared at the face of the boy with the little strength she had left.
"Amazing… I've always wanted to see that face, Annie. How does it feel to be on the edge of losing it all?" he told her while glowing with satisfaction. "It must have felt like how you feel now when my mother was trapped under the debris of our home, unable to move, until a Titan picked her up to eat her."
"Go fuck yourself…" she said weakly, barely able to even breathe.
"Don't speak like that, Annie! Your death will be a great help to humanity. You'll no longer kill anyone, and your powers will be safe in my hands! By transforming and eating you, I'll just say I saw a Titan run away. Reiner and Bertolt will be left with a choice, either go back, or continue the mission… But since they continued the mission without your fourth teammate, they'll keep going."
Every word of his reeked of madness. His breathing was harsh, not because of the fight, but because he was getting caught up in his fantasies of bloodshed. And yet, at that moment, for a reason she couldn't understand, she had this… muttering in her ear, that things were more complicated than they seemed.
The blonde girl couldn't utter a word.
She looked at Eren, seriously this time.
Not as a demon of Paradis. Not as a thorn in her foot she'd have to kill to make sure the mission would continue.
But as a girl, to a boy. A boy who had lost it all, and who had eyes that shined with madness. A boy so twisted by grief and pain he had gone completely crazy. The sense of glee he was feeling from her incoming trespassing couldn't be justified by simply revenge.
The boy… knew more. He had seen things he shouldn't have seen. He had lived things he shouldn't have gone through. He was broken, left without care.
He was buried so deep inside his own twisted reality he had forgotten the meaning of life. The way he acted with other humans, rude and distant, even with Armin and Mikasa, who obviously used to be his friends, who even now still stuck to him…
He only cared for the deaths of the warriors, and probably for the downfall of Marley after.
However, he continued.
"Bertolt is a headless sheep. After you, I'll eat Reiner. I'll force him to make a mistake, making suggestive comments about his family in Marley and the death of both you and the Jaw's previous owner. He's weak mentally, he'll go crazy in no time. Once Reiner is gone, Bertolt will be a piece of cake to get rid of. I just have to make him unable to transform, and he's as good as dead."
Annie remained silent. By now, she was simply looking at Yeager with what she supposed was compassion. She could allow herself to feel those emotions in front of the boy that wasn't looking at her, but this time, through her. He was breathing heavily, jubilant at the thought of taking care of the infiltrated warriors.
"After eating you three, maybe I'll eat Ymir. I have to make her disappear before Historia gets too close to her, or she'll be sad… She has already suffered enough," he kept on going through his monologue, and was just exterioring his thoughts with his words.
So that brown-haired girl Annie remembered as Ymir was the Titan that had eaten Marcel and had obtained the Jaw? Or was it another Titan? And who even was Historia?
"With those four Titans, I'll have seven of the nine primordial Titans… Then, I'll get Zeke and that Cart girl…"
Her eyes widened slightly. Seven of the nine Titans? To her knowledge, only the Coordinate hadn't been claimed by Marley. It meant they had somehow lost the Attack and Warhammer Titans, since she knew exactly who had every other Titan.
Warhammer and Attack Titans? No wonder he was so strong physically.
She sighed softly. Her hand wouldn't regenerate, and she was unable to transform into a Titan. It seemed the power of the Coordinate allowed him to just control transformations as he wished.
She knew she was doomed. He wouldn't let her go, that she was sure of, and she couldn't fight back. He had provoked her, and she had responded stupidly and had fallen right into the trap. She could only blame herself.
Surprisingly, she felt no anger. That guy would have made it impossible in the first place to complete the mission. She was only filled with regrets of what she couldn't do in her life, and what she'd leave behind.
She felt something fall on her cheek. Looking up, she saw blood drip from Eren's mouth. In his maniac gestures, he had bit his tongue, and blood was dripping down on her.
Maybe..?
The Female Titan had the rather remarkable ability of gaining abilities of Titans she had consumed parts of.
At that exact moment, a crazy thought passed through her mind.
And as the next drop of blood passed Eren's mouth, and fell onto her, she opened her mouth wide, pulled her tongue, and used her last remaining bit of strength to swallow the drop.
The effect was instantaneous. If Eren had blocked her abilities to transform, or to regenerate, he hadn't suppressed the abilities of the Female Titan as a whole.
She gained years of memories that were hers, and yet, belonged to another Annie, an Annie of a past life.
Images flashed before her eyes: images of a life she hadn't lived yet, of a life that had been lived without her. She saw the pain that Annie went through, through all her training as a warrior, then as a trainee. The betrayals she made, with a smile on her face to hide her envy to puke. Her fight, with the same boy in front of her, who at that time looked so full of life - battle she had lost, only to be paralysed for four years, where she was powerless. Then, her struggle to finally end it all, killing that boy that had carried such a burden on his shoulders - a burden he had decided to bear alone.
And that ending. That pitiful ending, for both her and the others. In the end, she had returned to her father, like she had wanted, but at what cost? She wouldn't ever be able to rest at night, to sleep without nightmares. Her friends all hated her, even the lover of that different Annie, a different Armin, who had changed so badly because of war, could never fully trust her because of her past.
It was laughable. That other Annie said she'd do it all over again if it meant returning to her father, but did it really?
And that poor boy.
Focusing on the child that was still pinning her, she simply looked directly into his eyes. What she thought was evil was just a defence barrier to protect himself from the world. The little of sanity he had left, after throwing all the rest away carrying the weight of a whole population behind him, he didn't allow himself to spend getting close to his previous friends.
In a world where memories were only his, who had lived terrific experiences one after the other, and was now among children he couldn't befriend because of the mental difference, he didn't have anyone to turn to.
It didn't take a genius to understand what the boy now wanted to do: end the story before it could begin. He'd kill her, and all the other primordials, to guarantee that nobody could ever interfere. Then, without anyone knowing its causes, he'd cause the rumbling like he did before, and simply erase the rest of the world.
He was carrying such a burden alone, again. In the end, the cycle repeated:
Eren Yeager wasn't free.
Has she ever felt compassion in her life? She couldn't tell. But right now, as she would die for the sake of that boy's perfect world, she smiled.
"Eren,"
His eyes widened. By now, he had probably remembered the power of the Female Titan, as she saw flickering thunder dancing around his jaw.
'He's going to transform thinking I'm going to use the borrowed powers of the Warhammer,' she thought calmly.
"It's not your fault. You don't have to do it all alone."
Silence. His transformation had been halted, and she knew her words had touched him when she felt the weight on her wrists become light. Carefully, she removed her hands from under his.
She didn't quite know how to comfort somebody. She had never really done it, even in that past life she had just seen, didn't she? So instead, she decided to use that same method the past Armin used to do on her whenever she freaked out.
Slowly and awkwardly, she wrapped her arms around his waists, trying to hold him. She couldn't find the strength to even slightly move her torso, but the mental embrace remained all the same.
"Even if you have to keep going, this time everything will be alright."
She sighed in relief when she felt his grip of his thighs around her waist soften, allowing her to breathe deeply. She smiled even more, ruffling his hair with her right hand. He just stared at her with the most shocked expression she had ever seen him wear, including in their past life when she had thrown him into the ground after their first spar.
She didn't think she could comfort that boy, who wasn't even close to a boy. He was more like an adult who had his childhood stolen, just like her.
And when did she ever become so soft she would comfort a distressed insane person? It seemed time had really given that brutal and dangerous woman a motherly instinct.
They remained that way for a pretty long time, under the starry night, both silently mourning their previous life. They mourned the disappearance of the people they had left behind, of the bad, but also small happy memories that kept them alive - all of which had never happened in this world.
Two old friends, turned enemies, reunited under that starry night.