There was a knock at the door. Glinda's head jerked up and her eyes widened.
"Elphie, quick! Behind the bed! Fiyero, you too!"
They both dove next to the bed and into a pile of clothes still sitting around from earlier. Glinda quickly threw her voluminous comforter and an avalanche of pillows on top of them. She just finished when a handmaid and a porter cautiously opened the door.
"My lady Glinda?" the maid asked.
"Yes?"
"Are you alright?"
"Yes…yes. I was just looking for…my…favorite tiara, that's all. You know, the one with pink and green."
"Uh, my lady? It's on your head."
"So it is. It's been a busy couple of weeks." She looked around nervously. "I'd be liable to lose my head if it wasn't attached." She gave a light laugh like the sound of tinkling bells. She knew the effect it had on people.
"Shall I clean the room, my lady?"
"No! I shall do it."
The maid looked at her askance.
"You, my lady?"
"Of course. I haven't practiced my magic today. A sorting spell would be just the thing."
"As my lady wishes. Do you need anything?"
"As a matter of fact, yes. I would like a large tray of sandwiches and a few pitchers of water. I have to prepare for my speech tomorrow, and I have a long way to go. So please knock when you return, and then you and the staff can have the night off. I shan't want to be bothered."
"Of course, my lady. As you wish."
As the girl and the porter left Glinda let out a sigh of relief. She turned to see Elphaba and Fiyero dig themselves out of the feather-down bog.
"Well, that was close. I can't believe you managed to fool them with that cleaning magic story. Anyway, what's this speech you have to give?" Elphaba said.
"Oh, you don't know what day it is, do you?"
"No."
"Congratulations!" Glinda said, and flung herself onto Elphaba. "You've been dead for five years."
"Wooo."
"Don't be like that." Glinda giggled. "Where have you been all these years, anyway?"
"Mostly moving around the countries outside of Oz."
"So you have no idea what's been going on then?"
"Not the faintest."
"Well, I'll fill you in then. You died, and I came back here. The Wizard left, and I threw Madam Morrible in jail."
"Good riddance."
"Yeah. She did make it easy for me by siphoning off public funds. Dorothy went home-"
"Little brat. I'm betting she took Nessa's shoes."
"Now Elphie, don't start that again. Her shoes are what sent Dorothy back wherever she came from."
"They weren't that powerful. I should know; I made them."
"No, but people who come from that other place have funny effects when interacting with magic here in Oz."
"You say that like it's a fact but the Wizard didn't have any magic, and he was from there."
"Of course but the people have to interact with something to do it."
"Can you give me another example to back up your idea?"
Glinda opened her mouth but then shut it quickly. Elphaba still noticed and arched an eyebrow.
"Well, it worked to send her away so that's a good start. Anyway," Glinda continued quickly before Elphaba could start arguing again, "Dorothy left, and I was named Throne Minister." She paused.
"Congratulations?" Elphaba ventured.
"Thank you. I went about cleaning up all the Wizard's messes, and there were quite a bit. I had to finish some work, start neglected areas of government, shut down bloated other areas, and repeal those silly Animal laws.
"Good!"
"I thought you'd like that. Anyway there was much financially that was needed to put right. It took me almost three years. Unfortunately, some did not like the new way of things. Taxes actually had to be collected, money could not be handed out to friends willy-nilly, the like. So they started agitating for me to be kicked out of office. Two years ago, as you may have guessed, I was politely asked to step down. I did so, because running a government can be such a pain. A few months later Munchkinland seceded from Oz."
"What!"
"Yep. It appears our Boq has gotten a taste for revolution. He'd been agitating for years and it just so happened after I stepped down. Rumor is the only thing that kept them in Oz after the Wizard left was me being Minister. Once I was forced out there was no reason to stay because the new administration would not work with them."
"Any truth to it?"
"I don't know. I probably did a bit better with them then the next Minister. He found a liking for taxes and has been heavy handed. I will admit to spreading the rumor, though."
"Glinda, you can politick with the best of them." Elphaba said smiling.
"Remember what I said? It's all about popular. Anyway, Boq is in charge Munchkinland and they have been a staring contest with Oz for the last couple of years."
"So what does this all have to do with a speech?"
"Well, every year I give a speech in remembrance of your death and the Wizard leaving."
"Chipper."
"Shush. Anyway, after the first year, I started slowly tweaking it. First more towards a celebration of the Wizard's accomplishments; then, after the Munchkinland split, towards Ozian accomplishments. I slowly marginalized you through the years. Then, last year, I referred to you as the Western Witch, but left Nessa with the Wicked Witch. Since Animal subversion is no longer illegal or really a big deal, the Wicked title kind of falls apart."
"I can't believe you'd lay that on Nessa!"
"Elphie," Glinda said very sternly, "it is easier to forgive someone on the wrong side of a political spat then a traitor to the state. As such, for you to be free on your titles, Nessa needs to take the blame. Unfair, yes. But better in the long run. Plus, it fits the current narrative with Munchkinland being seen as an enemy. And because Animals are joining Munchkinland in droves."
"Why?"
"Who knows? Probably because they don't trust Oz anymore. Maybe because the Munchkinlanders have always had a better relationship with Animals, being mostly rural. Possibly because they remember you. Fact is, it's happening, and it fits."
"It's hard to forget someone who's green."
"I know, but public opinion is all a popularity contest. If there's one contest I always win, it's popularity." Glinda said, and she beamed. "For once your anti-social behavior helped. Believe it or not, there are very few people who actually interacted with you enough to clearly remember you. You're mostly remembered for being odd and green."
"Thanks."
"You know I didn't mean it like that. I love you oddities and greenness. Anyway, I simply started telling my own version of events. I produced little books chronicling the events; storybooks, children books, collectors magazines, all of that stuff. I changed it so you were no longer green, but a one eyed, one legged hag." Glinda giggled. "Ridiculous, I know, but it has helped. Then, I started spreading all sorts of rumors about you and Nessa. She was green and you were in the chair; You painted yourself green out of piety for Lurline; That Nessa was a religious fanatic that had no arms and did magic. Crazy stuff like that."
"And how would that help, exactly?"
"It confuses the story. People begin to misremember and make up their own stories, and it confuses the issue more. Finally, they look to something written down."
"Your books."
"Yep. And since they present a garbled image also, they look to government. Unfortunately, the Wizard was particularly shoddy about keeping written records, and he's gone now. The next highest official is in jail. So the official who they turn to on officialness of the story is…"
"You."
"Me!" Glinda laughed. "And I spin everything to cause doubt on whether the Wicked Witch was green. Saying I only saw you in the Emerald City, and everyone looks green in the Emerald City. Saying I never saw the green girl in my sorcery classes at Shiz, nor did I ever see her do a hint of magic."
"Those are all really big lies."
"Someone once said that if you tell a big enough lie often enough people will believe it."
"That's a terrible philosophy."
"I agree, but Elphie, it's the only chance you have at living a life where you're not hunted. At least, one here in Oz." Glinda said, looking down. With me, she thought.
"I know, Glinda, but I won't ever be considered normal."
"No, but you can be considered not a criminal. It all hinges on tying everything to the Munchkinland's secession. Then, once the Emerald City and Munchkinland sort themselves out it will all be disregarded as propaganda."
"You really think this is going to work?" Elphaba said, and replayed a similar scene in here mind. This is never going to work.
"Of course. It may take a bit, but it will." Glinda replied, beaming. She too was back in the room after the Ozdust. You must not think that way anymore. The look of acceptance, and slightest bit of hope on Elphaba's face made it impossible to resist. "You're entire life is going to change, and all because of me!" She mimicked, and struck a ridiculous pose. Elphaba cracked up, and Fiyero gave anuncertain smirk.
"I feel like I'm missing something." He said.
"An inside joke." Glinda said.
"You started it, actually." Elphaba added.
"Tell me later." Fiyero said.
"Good point. I," Glinda said, and struck another ridiculous pose, "have work to do! And you two," she said, and wrinkled her nose, "could use some freshening up."
"I really don't freshen up since…." Fiyero said.
"I see. Hold still." Glinda retrieved a wand from her nightstand, and pointed it at Fiyero. She gave a few flicks (a couple that were quite unnecessary, Elphaba thought) and Fiyero noticeable cleaned up, restuffed, and repaired himself.
"Wow." He said. "I feel much better."
"A little spell I picked up from a witch friend of mine. So gifted, but insists on being a nanny." Glinda tsked. "Anyway, this room too." Glinda waved her wand again, and the room righted itself, sorted itself, and the clothes even folded themselves.
"Nice trick. What witch was this?" Elphaba asked.
"Her name is Marianne. Such a talent for house and illusion spells. Now for me, speech writing. For you," she said, and leveled a finger at Elphaba, "a bath."
"I don't think that's-"
"Tut tut tut." Glinda said, shoving Elphaba into the bathroom. "They'll be no argument. You smell like you haven't had a good bath in five years."
"There's not much hospitality in the wild."
"There you go, then. Go, go! There's the shampoo you like so much, and even oil. Now, be gone you stinky witch!"