Disclaimer: Still not my characters.
Jack stood just inside the door of the locker room, poking his head out into the hall, not that anyone could see him, hoping Daniel or Teal'c would pass by. He'd already used the locker room phone to call Daniel's lab, Teal'c room, the gym, commissary, and control room, but no one had seen either of them. Figured. They were never around when he needed them, but always under foot when he didn't. Okay, it was mostly Daniel who was under foot, but still. He muttered under his breath how he was going to make them all get little tracking chips that buzzed when he pressed a button on a remote. He would be the only one allowed a remote, of course. He let out a soft curse when as he saw Carter turn the corner and head his way. "Perfect," he said to himself, rolling his eyes. The one person he didn't really want to see at this moment was the only one he could find. He debated for a moment about whether he should call out to her or not, but in the end decided he needed help, and it wasn't like she could actually see him anyway.
"Psst! Hey, Carter," he called out softly. He'd waved his arm, but realized what a useless motion that was, and dropped it to his side.
"Carter!" He called louder, when it seemed she hadn't heard him.
Sam stopped and looked around. "Sir? Is that you?"
"You know anyone else who's invisible?" Jack asked.
"No Sir, I guess not. Um, where are you?"
"Over here," Jack said.
Sam raised her eyebrows. "I'm going to need a little more info, Sir. I can't see you, remember?"
"Of course I remember. I haven't gone completely senile yet. I'm over here. In the locker room."
"I'm not going to take a shower, Sir, so you can just leave."
"I'm not here to spy on you, Carter. I need your help. I've got…well, I've got a problem."
Walking to the door of the locker rooms, Sam let out a soft 'oh.' In front of her was a floating white towel, wrapped around what she assumed was Colonel O'Neill's waist. "A towel, Sir? Really?"
"Well, I could stand here naked, I suppose, but that might be weird."
Sam's mouth went dry at the thought. After all the shower fantasies she'd had lately, the last thing she needed was to think about was him standing naked in front of her. She cleared her throat before speaking. "Did you need something, Sir, or are you just bored?"
"Come on, Carter, give me some credit."
She stood, waiting, finally raising her eyebrows in question.
Jack ran a hand over his face and through his hair. "Okay, here's the thing, oh, and no laughing, that's an order. I kind of lost my clothes."
Sam's eyebrows shot up into her bangs, so that they were not longer visible. "You…lost…your clothes? How?" She hadn't given that a thought. When he'd triggered the machine, his clothing had turned invisible too. "Wait, have you been wearing the same clothes for the last three weeks? Ewww."
"I've been washing them, while I took a shower, and drying them with the blow dryer. I'm not a caveman you know."
"I don't know. I've seen your house. It's not exactly going to be featured in Better Homes and Gardens."
Jack let out an audible sigh. "Hardy-har. Now, can you please help me out here? I'm kind of flapping in the breeze as it were."
"So, how exactly did you lose them?" She asked, ignoring his last remark.
Jack rolled his eyes. "I didn't wash them today, but put them on the bench. Some others came in while I was showering, and they must have knocked them off, because I can't find them."
Trying not to smile, Sam bit her lip. "Well, we should just be able to feel around and find them."
"Oh, hey, why didn't I think of that?" He asked sarcastically.
Ignoring him, Sam walked over to the bench and dropped to all fours, directly in front of this locker. Jack almost moved to help her, but stood stock still admiring her six. Dear heavens, it really was sheer perfection. He silently thanked whatever force in the universe that would create such beauty.
"You sure you left them here?" She glanced up at him.
Snapping himself out of his admiration, he moved to stand closer to her. "Of course. I laid them directly in front of my locker, specifically so I'd be able to find them. I'm telling you, they're not there."
"Well, they couldn't just disappear," she told him.
"You can't see me, but I'm giving you a look," he replied.
She chuckled, still feeling around on the floor. "Right. Yeah, right. You didn't actually disappear though, I mean you're still physically there, we just can't see you due to the waves you're-"
Jack threw his hands up over his ears. "Ack! Ack! Ack! I don't care how it works, Carter, I just need to find my clothes. I mean I guess I could just go full commando. That would be kind of cool. Literally, and that's not a word I just bandy about."
She stopped, and looked up at him, or rather where the towel stood. It took all of her willpower not to think about hooking her fingers under the edge, pulling it off, and running her hands down his naked flesh.
"Um, I'm not sure that's such a good idea." Certainly not good for her mental lucidity anyway.
"Why not?" he asked, curious about the sudden flush that crept up her face. "It's not like anyone can see me. I'm the only one who will know I'm naked." He motioned toward her. "And you of course." The idea of that made him smile ridiculously. Of course, now this might make him quite happy that she couldn't see him at times, as certain parts of his body frequently responded to her in ways that were completely not appropriate for a CO.
Sam coughed at the thought of knowing he was walking around with no clothes on. It was terribly erotic, and she wasn't sure she'd make it through her days. She'd be too busy fantasizing, more than usual, to get any kind of work completed. "Um…well…I …uh. Yeah, no, not a good idea." Good grief, what was wrong with her? Get it together, Sam, she admonished herself. If only he weren't so damn sexy. Even invisible, he made the hair on the back of neck stand on end.
"Aww, come on, Carter, it's not like people could see."
Sam shook her head, trying to think of a reason, any reason, to get him to put some clothes on. Her mind grabbed onto and idea. "Sir, we don't really know how long this will last. What if…what if you suddenly become visible in front of that nice lady who makes the pies in the commissary, or the control room next to Walter?"
Jack gave a short laugh. "Well, Mrs. Edwards might give me extra pie from now on, and Walter might find a whole new respect for me."
"Sir…" She groaned, as the brief thought that he might be standing in her lab when he became visible, flashed through her mind.
"Fine, fine," he said. "You probably have a point, what with that big ol' brain of yours, and all, but we still have the problem of my missing clothes."
She pursed her lips, in the way she did when she was thinking, or rather thinking even more, and Jack smiled. Her brilliance constantly amazed him. When they'd first met, he was certain he was going to be saddled with an annoying, know it all scientist, who would constantly complain, and prove to be a huge pain in the ass. He'd been pleasantly surprised by her abilities, and humility, and had become fond of her almost immediately. He'd become more than fond of her after a few months, and then those feelings had crossed a line that should never be crossed between two officers serving in the same chain of command. He'd tried to deny the feelings, and then to put them aside, once they'd had to make their confessions with that damn zebra machine, but he'd failed miserably, and working beside her each and every day was both wonderful and torturous.
"Sir?" Carter's voice brought him out of his musings. She was looking at him expectantly.
"Huh? Sorry?" He asked with his usual irreverence.
Sam rolled her eyes. "I said I couldn't find them." I've looked, or rather felt around for them, and they're just not here. Are you one hundred percent sure this is where you left them?"
"Of course. I think."
"You think?" She asked skeptically.
"Every now and then," he smirked. "Only when I have to."
Sam shook her head, and smiled. "Don't hurt yourself, Sir."
"Ouch!" He said with mock sincerity. "That's not very 2IC-like of you. I think I might have to write you up for insubordination."
Coming to her feet, Sam tilted her head, and glanced quickly down at the towel, she was certain hung low on his hips. She imagined what it would be like standing there together, if he weren't invisible. Again, she pictured sliding her hand down his body, her lips pressing against his skin. Shaking her head to dispel the image, she tried to smile. "Well, you'll have to do it out of uniform, Sir. I simply can't find it."
"That's not what a man likes to hear," he told her with a smirk, as he plopped down onto the bench. "Crap. What am I supposed to do?"
Sam sat down next to him, but kept a more than normal amount of space between them. She was already feeling quite warm, and she thought if she sat any closer, she might just go up in flames. "Well, I suppose you can put a uniform on."
He turned his head toward her. "Um, isn't that the problem, Carter? I don't have a uniform to put on."
"Yes, you do. You don't have to wear your invisible uniform, just wear one of your others."
Jack raised his eyebrows, even though he knew she couldn't see them. "You want me to just saunter down the halls of the SGC in a uniform that looks like no one is wearing it? Don't you think that would be, oh, I don't know, weird?"
"As opposed to you being completely invisible?" She countered.
"Touché, Major." Standing, he opened his locker, pulled out a uniform, and began putting it on. "What?" He asked when Sam turned her back to him.
"I thought, you know, I'd give you some privacy."
Jack rolled his eyes. "For cryin' out loud, Carter, I'm invisible. You can't see anything even if you wanted to."
"Oh, I'd like to," she mumbled under her breath.
He stopped moving, staring at her back. "What was that Major?"
Sam cringed. He hadn't heard her, had he? She shook her head, not trusting her voice.
Finishing up the buttons, on his top, thinking about what he was certain he'd heard, Jack rolled up the sleeves. "Okay, it's safe to turn around," he teased.
Turning to face him, Sam couldn't help but laugh.
"What?" he asked, turning this way and that, trying to see if he'd missed a button or something.
Shaking her head, she pursed her lips to quell the laughter. "It's just…you…um. Why don't you go look in the mirror, Sir?"
Following her suggestion, he walked over to the large wall mirror and laughed along with her. Staring back at him was a uniform that moved, as if it had a mind of its own. "Yeah, I get it. This isn't going to be weird, at all!"
"Better than being naked, Sir."
"Oh, I don't know," he told her, his voice low and silky. "I can think of some instances where being naked would have distinct advantages." Sam's mouth went dry. He was moving closer to her, slowly, but with purpose. He stopped when he was only a few inches from her. "Wouldn't you agree, Carter?"
"Agree?" Her voice cracked slightly.
He moved even closer, until she could feel his breath against her ear. "Agree that being naked would have distinct advantages in certain situations?" Jack knew he was going way too far this time, but hearing what he was positive she'd said, made him somehow forget himself.
She nodded, her voice failing her. She could think of many situations where it would absolutely be an advantage; all of them centered on him.
"I thought so," he whispered huskily. He was so close; he knew he could kiss her without moving his head more than three inches. He could see pulsing her increased heartbeat in her artery, and the way her tongue just shot out to moisten her lips told him she realized it too. He started to move his head in, when he heard voices just outside the locker room.
"Dammit," he said, pulling away. He wasn't quite sure why he'd come so close to kissing her, but it seemed like a great idea in the moment. Hell, it seemed like a great idea every second of every day, but there was something in that moment that made it seem like it was more possible than ever before.
"Sam!" Daniel said, as soon as he saw her. His eyes turned to the uniform standing very close to her. "Um-Jack?"
With a lingering look, that she couldn't see, Jack stepped away. "Daniel," he drawled.
"Oh, hey, you've got a uniform on. We've been looking for you." He motioned between Teal'c and himself.
Jack smirked. "Well, I have been rather difficult to find."
"Indeed, you have, O'Neill. Most difficult." Teal'c gave a quirk of his lip.
"Very funny, Jack, but, this is serious," Daniel told him, waving around a book that was ridiculously thick. Jack thought if he lost his hold on it, Daniel just might knock himself out. "Teal'c and I have found out some stuff about the… the invisible thing. You know, translated. Teal'c's been a big help."
"And?" Sam prompted, when he stopped speaking.
Daniel jumped, startled by her question. "Oh, yeah, it's important."
More voices could be heard in the hall. "What's say we take this somewhere else, kids," Jack told them.
"I believe that would be wise, O'Neill."
Daniel looked around, surprised to see that they were standing in the locker room. "Oh, yeah. Let's go to Sam's lab. I'm sure there's more space for you to sit in hers than mine."
Jack rolled his eyes. Typical.