New chapter time! Getting these updates up in a more timely fashion. This one is a little longer, as most of the emotional ones are. I'd say we're getting into the middle part of the fic now, or at least, the second of three storylines for Leonard and Penny.

"Leonard," Penny said, "is it my day or Gilda's?"

"To take the girls to school?" Leonard asked. "It's Gilda's. She's off today."

"Okay," Penny said sleepily. Noticing that Leonard was dressed, she sat up. "What time is it?"

"Seven. Ada was quiet, so I figured I'd let you sleep a little longer."

"Oh," she said, nodding and curling back up on her side. "Okay."

"But when you're up," Leonard said. "You and me are going out."

She rolled over onto her back and looked up at him, squinting. "Huh?"

"We're going to lunch. I took the day off. Gilda's going to watch Ada and try and use her to convince Mark that Iris needs a sister."

"Leonard," Penny said, sitting up again, "I'm tired. I don't feel like going anywhere."

"Hey," Leonard said, sitting down beside her. "You've barely left the apartment since we got back from the hospital. You need to get out and get some fresh air." He pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and tilted his head to see her better. "Hey, we haven't gotten to spend time together since Ada was born. Today we have a chance; let's take it."

From the other room came a wailing sound, followed by Savannah yelling "Mommy! Ada wants milk!"

Penny sighed and pressed her fingers to her temples, closing her eyes. "Coming!" She slid out of bed, touching Leonard's knee as she did so. "Okay," she said quietly to him as she headed for the other room.

The last thing Penny had wanted to do was dress up, but Leonard assured her that she didn't need to. "We're not going anywhere fancy, I promise." He took her by the hand and led her down to the car, glad that she was walking next to him and not falling behind. She was, however, too quiet for his liking, and he tried to cheer her up by turning the music to a country station. The biggest reaction that got out of her was a slight bobbing of the head. Leonard looked at the artists name on the display. Shania Twain was a name he knew, thanks to her, so it was easy to commit to his memory for future reference.

"So," Leonard said, pulling up to a seafood restaurant. "Here we are. Nice and casual."

Penny nodded. "You took me here after Savannah was born. When I got that weird post pregnancy craving."

Leonard smiled, glad to have her responding to him. "I did."

They went inside. Leonard was glad that they got a seat by an open window, but he frowned when Penny only ordered an appetizer. "You not hungry?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Not really. I might be stealing some of your fries, though."

"Of course," he said, reaching across the table and squeezing her hand. She smiled.

"So I was thinking," Leonard said, "I've got quite a bit of money saved up, and you know I was going to use some of it on those life sized Star Wars statues, but now that we have Ada, and Savannah's going to be in Kindergarten next year…"

Penny cocked her head. "Yeah?"

"So I was thinking," Leonard said, "maybe we should think about finding a house."

Penny raised her eyebrows. "A house?"

"Yeah," Leonard said. "Apartments are great, but they always feel at least a little bit temporary. A house would be something we would have for as long as we wanted. It'd be ours, you know? Plus, Savvy wants a dog, and…"

"She told you about that, huh?" Penny said, smiling a little bit.

"Yeah. And we could do that if we had a house."

"Leonard," Penny said putting a hand over her eyes, "I don't really have the energy for all that right now."

"It doesn't have to be this moment," Leonard said. "Just something I think we should discuss."

"What about getting married?" Penny said. "Isn't that our logical next step?"

Leonard looked a little surprised. "Well, we decided to have kids before getting married because we weren't getting any younger. And now they're not getting any younger."

"Do you want to marry me, Leonard?" Penny asked, feeling suddenly angry.

Leonard looked at her in confusion. "Of course. I love you."

"Well," Penny started, but the waiter showed up with their food, so she put on a smile and thanked him before continuing, "why do we always put it off, then? Why is there always something else that comes first?"

Leonard hesitated before speaking again. "Are you mad?"

His question seemed to surprise her, and she stopped, thinking. "No," she finally said. "No, I'm not mad, at least I don't think I am…I'm just confused. Is there some sort of reason why we never put out the effort to marry?"

"It's not like we haven't done anything," Leonard said. "We've been building our family, Penny." He shook his head. "I-I never realized you were unhappy."

"I'm not," Penny said, taking his hand back. "I'm not. God, Leonard, I love you, but…" she inhaled. "Bernadette's told me about how she'll smell what she thinks is eggs. She won't pay it any mind because she thinks it's eggs. But then it's not eggs at all. It's sulfur. Sulfur smells like eggs," she added.

Leonard nodded. "I got it."

"So at…at face value, we think we haven't gotten married because of my dad getting sick, and Iris wandering off, and getting pregnant with Ada, but…what if there's another reason we never considered? What if we haven't figured out what the sulfur is yet?" She barely held his gaze for a second before dropping her eyes and letting out a sigh. "I can't figure it out. I'm so tired, Leonard."

"I know," he said comfortingly, squeezing her hand and leaning over to put his other hand on top. "Savannah was better at sleeping than Ada is."

She nodded. "Ugh. I'm not going to be able to sleep until I'm dead." She pulled back and leaned into the booth, sighing. "Leonard, I can't do anything. I'm tired, I'm worrying about our relationship…" she sighed. "Just take me home. I'm only ruining your day."

"You can't ruin my day," Leonard said firmly. "Penny, look at me." She opened her eyes. "Have you considered that you may have post-partum depression?"

She blinked. "I didn't when Savannah was born."

"This isn't like when Savannah was born though, is it?" Leonard asked. "You're always tired, you have some good days, but then you get irritable and lose your appetite. I think it's worth talking to someone about."

"Look, honey," he said, "you might not remember it, but you had a rough delivery. It was taxing on you physically, and now you have to recover while taking care of two kids, and the country's maternity leave laws mean I haven't been able to be home with you as much as I'd like."

"I remember."

Leonard cocked his head. "Remember what?"

Penny sighed. "I remember when Ada was born. When my uterus ruptured. I was on the floor. I wanted to get in the bed, but I couldn't stand. She was in a hurry. Then I…I felt it happen, and you were begging me to stay conscious and I was doing everything I could to not black out but it hurt so bad and then the doctors and nurses were yelling and you were gone and they were taking me to the O.R. and then…" she shook her head, and when she spoke again, her voice cracked, and Leonard became suddenly aware of how hard she was trying not to cry. "It all came rushing back to me," she said, "when I'd sleep."

"Is…is this what makes you wake up in a panic?" Leonard asked gently.

She nodded. "Uh – huh," she whimpered, taking in a quick, deep breath. "My body couldn't adjust to the fast labor, Leonard," she said. "It was my job to take care of Ada for nine months and then bring her into the world, and if not for a half dozen other people and modern medicine…" Penny's hands started to shake, "she wouldn't be here. I failed her, Leonard. I failed her and you and Savannah and the doctors picked up the slack and saved her life, and kept me here for you and the girls."

The waiter walked by just then, and Leonard reached out and pushed a handful of bills into his hand. "That's for our food. Keep the change," he said, standing up and pulling Penny out of the booth and outside. He sat them down on the bench and pulled her close, holding her head against his shoulder. She was sobbing freely now, her whole body wracking, and he held her as closely as he could, rocking gently. "Penny, Penny," he said. "It's okay. No one blames you. You didn't fail anyone."

"You're just saying that," she said. On a normal day, Leonard would have briefly considered that she was just fishing for compliments, but not today. Today she was completely, wholeheartedly convinced that he was just saying that, and that hurt him more than that one date he'd had just after he and Penny had broken up that had a hundred different ways to hit him in the balls.

"No, I'm not," he said, thinking momentarily of another time, more than a decade ago, when she first cried on his shoulder and he assured her that she was perfect. There was so much more weight behind her tears now, so much more history between the two of them, and his word choice was different, but his opinion of Penny hadn't changed in the slightest. He had different reasons now, but he still believed that she was perfect. She had her flaws, but they made her three dimensional, a real, relatable person that he could love as he did. "You did not fail me. You couldn't. You're Wonder Woman, you hear me? You're the mother of our two little girls. The circumstances surrounding their births do not change that." He moved his hand to her cheek, tracing it, wiping tears from around her eyes with his thumb. "Let's go in and talk to the doctor, okay? Let's find a way to get you through this."

He felt her nod. "We can't tell the girls, okay?" she asked. "I don't want them to know about this."

"They won't know," Leonard said, rubbing her back. "I promise you. This is just going to be you and me."

Penny managed to crack a smile. "Who ever said a couple with kids never got time to themselves?"

Leonard gave a crooked smile, and then put his hands on her face and kissed her. "I love you, Penny," he said, holding eye contact and keeping his hands where they were. "Just remember that, okay?"

She nodded, putting her hands on his knee. "I know," she said quietly. "Leonard, I just want to feel normal again."

"You will," he told her. "You will. I promise. Just don't forget that I love you. And so does Savannah and Ada. You're not weak. You're like Princess Leia. No matter how tough stuff gets, you'll get through it."

Penny gave a small laugh. "I suppose that's my cue to stop acting like Padmé Amidala in Return of the Sith and buck up?"

Leonard smiled. "I think you feel better already. Although, it's Revenge of the Sith."

Penny may be feeling better at the end of the chapter, but it's just the relief of sharing how she feels with Leonard. Post-partum depression doesn't go away that fast, so there will be several chapters dealing with this, but part of what Penny needed was to tell Leonard how hopeless she felt.