I remember all those times I fantasized about what having a family with Santana would be like. I remember thinking about how old we would be when we had our first child, how many children would we have, what they would look like, where'd we live, would we be good parents. I thought about those things a lot over the last seven years of our marriage. But nothing…nothing beats the real thing.

I use to think that I would never love someone as much or more than I love Santana. I truly didn't know love until I met Santana. No one has ever loved me like she does. She's always been someone I could talk to about anything. It could be the most intense topic or the most embarrassing topic and Santana will just listen and be encouraging or whatever I need her to be at the moment. That one time we broke up in college for a few days was some of the worst days of my life. Even till this day I think my whole world would fall apart if I didn't have Santana. She is still one of the most important people in my life but now Ava. Ava Berry-Lopez is what I breathe for.

She became my first love the moment I knew she was inside of me. I know Santana feels the same. We would and do put Ava before any and everything. When she came crying into the world I thought I'd die of happiness. She is so perfect. A perfect combination of the woman I love and myself.

I had no doubt Santana would be a great mother. When we brought Ava from the hospital, Santana waited on me hand and foot. She fussed over the baby and me all day. If Ava woke in the middle of the night Santana would jump up to get her, knowing I'd had to get up shortly anyway to feed our beautiful child. She just wanted me to get as much rest as I could.

"San…" I laugh when I walk into the nursery and see Santana standing over the baby crib, watching our little girl sleep. "Baby you have to go." I grab her elbow.

"Wait. One more minute." Santana leans in, kissing Ava's chubby little cheek. "I love you."

I roll my eye, a little smile on my face as I follow Santana out into the hallway. I pull the door up a little before going into our bedroom. "You need to hurry before you're late." I sit the baby monitor on the night stand next to the bed.

"Why can't I call off?" Santana pouts. "I want to spend time with you guys."

"You are ridiculous." I shake my head and throw Santana scrub top at her.

"Whatever. You just want her all to yourself." Santana jokes as she finishes getting ready for work.

"That's right." I yawn and sit on the bed. Santana finishes getting herself together and then we are walking down the hall. "No." I move in front of the door before Santana can push the baby room door open.

"Why not?" Santana frowns. "I just want to see her again before I go."

"Because you almost woke her up already." I argue. "She needs to sleep. I need her to sleep." I stress.

"I won't touch her. I just need to see her." Santana pouts and I give in. I move out of the way. I walk down stairs and sit on the couch, waiting for Santana to come down.

Santana comes down the stairs three minutes later with the phone to her ear. "…okay. I'm coming down the stairs now. Please don't knock. Ava is asleep."

I frown as I watch Santana walk over to the door and open it. "Hey." Quinn steps inside with a grin on her face.

"Hi." I get up from the couch and move closer to them. "What are you doing here?"

Quinn pouts. "You're pose to be excited to see your best friend." I just stare at her. "I came to keep you company while San's at work."What Quinn really is saying is that Santana asked her to come keep an eye on me.

I haven't been getting that much sleep since Santana went back to work a few days ago. I'm so use to Santana and me both being home, taking turns caring for Ava. Now with it just being me, for more than half the day, it's hard to find time to sleep. It's like every time I close my eyes to take a nap with her, she wakes up.

I haven't really said anything to Santana about it, but we've been married for eight years and known each other for fourteen. She knows me well enough to just know.

And she also knows that I won't call someone on my own to help me out so she called Quinn for me.

"You didn't have to, Quinn." I protest weakly.

"Shut up, Rach." Quinn pushes pass me. "I'm going to make myself some tea."

Quinn leaves Santana and me standing by the front door. "You need some sleep, babe." Santana says tugging on my t-shirt until I'm in her arms.

We share a kiss before she leaves. I walk back into the living room to see Quinn sitting comfortably on the couch.

"Hey." I sit next to her and rest my head on her shoulder.

Quinn giggles and puts her arm around my shoulder, holding me to her. "You know you could have called me yourself."

I just hum and close my eyes. "Go get in the bed. I have very strict instructions from your wife. Santana would kill me if I let you sleep on the couch."

I roll my eyes but get up anyway. "I just need a few hours." I make sure the baby monitor is working and Quinn has everything she needs incase Ava wakes up. "Thank you."

I quickly make my way to my bedroom. Motherhood is defiantly tiring but just seeing my daughter makes it all worth it.

TBC