"…don't forget the rolls."
I move the phone away from my ear as I grab the bag of chips out of my three year old hands. "Stop picking up stuff. We are sticking to the list, remember? We just talked about this."
Ava starts in with the pout but, "San! Santana Lopez!" I put the phone back to my ear when I hear Rachel shouting.
"Put the pout away kid." I say into the phone even though my eyes are locked with my daughters.
"What?" Rachel asks confused.
"Nothing. What were you saying?"I say quickly.
Rachel sent me to the grocery store with a list of things to get. Usually I would have no problem with this task. It usually doesn't take make that long to grab what we need and leave. Usually I'm alone. But not today. Today Rachel decided that instead of keeping Ava with her, she would send her to the store with me. I rarely go to the grocery store alone with Ava. The reason being, I can't say no to her most of the time. She's just too cute! But I've been trying to change that. I've been being strict with Ava.
In four months we will have another kid. Ava needs to learn to share and be more disciplined. She's not a bad kid at all. She just knows how to get what she wants out of me. She knows Rachel doesn't play around. But me…I'm more likely to give in. But not anymore.
So I feel like today is a test. Rachel is testing me out with this trip to the store. She wants to see how well I do out and about at the store with Ava on my own.
"Don't forget the rolls."Rachel repeats.
"I know. I got it." I grab Ava's hand and push the cart. "Come on little girl."
"I want chips!" Ava snatches her hand away from me.
"Ava!" I growl. "Rach, I gotta go." I end the call, stuffing the phone in my pocket.
"Don't pull away from me." I stoop down and grab her little hands.
"I want the chips!" She pouts. I can see the crocodile tears coming.
"I said no Ava and I mean it." I stick to my guns. "Keep misbehaving and I'll put you in time out when we get home.
She frowns. "But mama…"
"No buts baby."I kiss her forehead and stand back up. "Let's go."
This time she doesn't put up a fight.
We get home a half an hour later. Rachel greets us with kisses and helps me put the groceries up.
"Interesting."
I look over my shoulder when Rachel says that. "What?"
Rachel shrugs with a little smile. "You did well."
"Huh?"
"I didn't see any candy wrappers and Ava didn't come into the house like she had a secret."
I roll my eyes. "I'm not a total push over."
"Right." Rachel teases.
"Whatever." I shove the last canned good into the cabinet before moving to walk out the kitchen. Rachel blocks me. Her little belly bumping into my crossed arms.
"Hey," She grabs my face. "I was only teasing."
And I know that. Usually it wouldn't bother me but…
"I'm a good parent, right?" I move to walk around her when Rachel just rolls her eyes.
"Santana." Rachel grabs onto my arm. "Hey…what's going on?"
I stare at her for a minute before sighing. "I don't know…I just…"
"Baby," Rachel takes my face in-between her hands. "You are a wonderful parent." She kisses my nose. "Yea…you sometimes have problems being the discipliner but when it counts you really know how to take care of business. Ava is obsessed with you. Even after you tell her no. You're still her hero."
"You think?" I grin.
"I know." She leans in, we share a quick kiss. Rachel pulls back and places both our hands on her belly. "There is no one else I'd ever want to share my life with, to make beautiful babies with. Sometimes I think you don't know how wonderful you are Santana. How lucky I feel to be your wife, your best friend, the mother of your children." She smiles up at me. "I feel so blessed to be yours and have you as mines."
"Stop." I pull her into my arms. "You're going to make me cry."
"You're so soft."
"Oh hugs!" Next thing I know I feel Ava little arms wrap around our legs. "Hug me too, mommy!"
00000000000
"Are you serious right now?" Quinn opens the door with a scowl on her face, like she just rolled out of bed.
I push my way into her house. "It's only seven o'clock. Why are you in the bed?"
"Shut up." We go into the living room to sit down. "What's going on?"
"I just needed to take a break." I sigh.
Rachel and I just had a nasty argument. Instead of going to Matt I came to Quinn's because she's kind of like my co sponsor. Matt is great but soft. He will take time to talk me down, while Quinn will get right to it. She will cut me down and tell me the truth straight up.
"What happened?"
I tell Quinn about how I came home from work, tired and just ready to sit down but Rachel wanted to complain about how I left the kitchen a mess when I left this morning. And then a few hours later her feelings flipped and instead of yelling at me, Rachel was all over me. She wanted sex but I was really just too exhausted so I told her no. Rachel got upset and picked a fight and when I didn't argue back she got even more upset. I didn't want to say anything to hurt her or whatever so I just left. I know that pissed her off more. But I had to leave, because before I would just deal with it and get me a drink to calm down. That's not an option anymore.
"I'm just super tired and can't deal with your best friend right now. Can I crash here for a few hours?"
Quinn rolls her eyes. "Don't stay to long. I don't want Rachel freaking out."
I get a few hours of sleep in before getting up to go home. I check my phone on my way to the car. I have ten missed texts messages and a shit load of missed phone calls.
I come home to a quiet house. I walk into our bedroom to see Rachel in the middle of the bed with Ava lying across the bottom of the bed. She's been going through this faze when she always wants to sleep in the bed with us.
I kiss her little cheek before stripping out of my clothes. I go to the bathroom to brush my teeth. When I come back Rachel is awake, pulling Ava from the end of the bed to lie next to her.
"Hey." I whisper when we make eye contact.
"Hi." She snuggles up to Ava.
"Can I join or no?"
Rachel shrugs.
I walk around the bed and climb in behind her. I lean over and kiss her cheek.
"Love you." I whisper into her neck. Our hands intertwined, resting on her belly.
"I know." Rachel squeezes my hand. "I love you more."