No Excuses 5 - Support
So Beast Boy is clearly on Raven's mind, in one way or another. Is this because of her changing attitude toward him or simply because he's unwittingly beaming his feelings at her 24 hours a day! Who knows? Certainly not me, which might pose a problem considering I'm the 'author'.
Raven awoke feeling unusually well rested. She recalled her dream and blushed a little - the symbolism was difficult to ignore. She suspected her unconscious mind was visualising his aura as more mundane objects, hence the big green scarf blanketing her emotions. A very literal image of what she felt through her empathic senses. She realised that the aura, the beacon was still there, even as he slept. That ruled out asking him to control it again, it was clearly not a conscious decision. This probably meant she would be dreaming about Beast Boy in one way or another for quite some time. She had mixed feelings on that - she often had... less than enjoyable dreams. Was it so wrong to be pleased if Beast Boy chased them away for a while? Shaking her head, Raven cleared her mind: she wasn't internally debating anything until she got her tea... and maybe some toast. After dressing, she walked to the common room, casually greeting Robin as he sat with his coffee, flicking the TV on to the morning news. She quickly and expertly brewed her tea, hand reaching out to grab some bread... but it stopped short. Her eyes had rested on a brightly coloured box. It was the cereal Beast Boy regularly enjoyed - vocally - for his breakfast. Her curiosity overwhelmed her and Raven soon found herself holding a bowl of colourful cereal, with real milk, not soy, and floating it, her tea and herself over to the breakfast table with Robin. He looked away from the TV and raised an eyebrow at her choice.
"Trying something new, Raven?" he asked. Raven finished her mouthful before answering.
"My curiosity got the better of me..." she answered, shoveling another spoonful into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully. When she swallowed, she rested her head on her other hand, poking at the cereal with her spoon. Her expression was close to neutral but Robin detected a little disappointment.
"You don't like it?" he asked. Raven sighed.
"It's delicious," Raven said, sounding almost depressed. "I don't know if I'd eat it every day but... it's delicious," she repeated. Robin was thoroughly confused now.
"So... why is that a bad thing?" he said. Raven finally looked straight at him.
"It's silly... I was kind of hoping I wouldn't like it," Raven muttered.
"Okay I am totally lost here, Raven..." Robin admitted. Raven sighed again.
"It's silly," she said again. Robin gave her time to order her words. "Beast Boy and I... our relationship has always been... volatile. Yes, we're friends but we get on each other's nerves. We can't stand each other sometimes... at least that's what I used to think. That aside, Beast Boy would usually find some way to... get under my skin at least once a day. The last few days, though... I get why he might be keeping his distance but it's still different. So maybe I was hoping I wouldn't like his cereal. That I would have something about Beast Boy I could complain about. Azar... it sounds even more idiotic when I say it out loud!" Raven finished, still prodding her breakfast. Robin chuckled a little.
"Yeah, it kinda does. He probably thought the same way for a long time, though. I can't imagine he would have been so ga-ga over Terra if he had already fallen for you. Things must have changed for him some time after that," Robin surmised.
"Things change..." Raven whispered, recalling her conversations with Beast Boy about Terra. She started to wonder if that had been the turning point, when he started to move on from Terra and, apparently, set his sights on Raven instead. She shook her head again, starting to at her cereal again: this line of thought was pointless. How it started was not her problem, she only had to deal with the result. Robin interrupted her musings.
"Did you know you're the first girl to ever reject Aqualad? He seemed a little shaken," Robin said, laughter in his voice. Raven smirked. To think, she had briefly considered letting Aqualad be her 'first'... now she was his, in a manner of speaking.
"First ever, huh? Hmmm..." Raven smiled as she chewed, feeling oddly proud.
"If you don't mind me asking," Robin said. "Why'd you turn him down? Not that I'm not pleased you did but... I know you like him a little." Raven was quiet for a moment.
"I think he's attractive... I'm not sure I would go so far as saying I 'like' him. But he's respectful and there wouldn't have been any emotional backlash. I know his reputation as well as you do... I knew what he was offering." Robin was visibly uncomfortable now, glad Raven had stopped short of saying what Aqualad 'offered'.
"You...*ahem*... you make it sound like you should have gone out with him, Raven. If all you were interested in was... that." Raven smile a small, wan smile.
"It isn't, really... but respect is more than I can probably expect in a partner." Robin's confused frown compelled Raven to continue. "Let's just say I get a few intimate fan letters... and respect is not what men think when they see me, it seems." Robin was angry, but filed this conversation away for the time being.
"Then why say no, Raven?" he asked, though he thought he had guessed.
"Beast Boy," Raven said simply. "Considering how he feels about me, idiotic though it may be, arranging a date with another man right in front of him, days after he was forced to confess? That would be far too... cruel. Like I said, we're friends. I wouldn't trade any of my friends for anything, let alone a casual dalliance with Aqualad." Robin smiled. Raven didn't use the word 'friend' lightly. His smile slowly disappeared as Raven finished her cereal, moving on to her tea.
"Raven... I think we should talk about these letters." Raven looked at Robin with slight surprise, not only at the subject of the conversation but at the change in his aura. It had become dark, dangerous... and cold. Then, as she refocused on her empathy, she realised something else: the beacon that surrounded Beast Boy... it was just outside the common room doors. It had a streak of the same darkness that Robin now showed, though in Beast Boy it wasn't cold but boiling hot. Raven groaned.
"Oh no... Beast Boy!" Raven called, getting up and walking to the door. They opened to reveal the fuming green teenager.
"Those men... those letters... what did they say, Rae?" he hissed. Raven let the pet name slide for once.
"... I'm not really comfortable saying it out loud," Raven answered. That was enough for Beast Boy. Anything bad enough to make Raven this uncomfortable would have to be bad.
"Let me see them, Rae. I'll get their scents and I'll find them..." he said, darkly. Raven was touched by his concern if not his slightly caveman approach to chivalry.
"You'll find them? You'll search the entire country for four men?" Raven challenged, a little heat creeping into her voice.
"If I have to!" Beast Boy replied, undaunted. "No one gets to say things like that to my Raven!" Raven's anger lessened a little at his dedication, but she raised an eyebrow at him.
"Your Raven?" she said, pointedly. Beast Boy's frown became less severe, and his cheeks flushed.
"My friend, Raven," he corrected. Raven smirked, then sighed. She fixed him with a stare, and his anger flowed away as he lost himself in her eyes.
"Beast Boy. I appreciate the sentiment, I really do... but you can't go hunting down every person who says bad things about me. Heroes don't act that way. You are a hero, aren't you?" Raven asked. Beast Boy pouted at her... that was a low blow.
"I guess so," he mumbled.
"That's what I thought. Now are you joining us for breakfast or not?" Raven turned and walked back to the table without waiting for his answer.
"Fine..." said Beast Boy and still sulking, he walked past them toward the kitchen, but paused when his nose caught something: the smell of his cereal. He glanced at the bowl which currently sat between Raven and Robin. Robin was still looking at him and subtly shook his head and pointed at Raven, indicating it had been her bowl. Raven herself sat, eyes closed, sipping her tea. When she opened them, the formerly sullen Beast Boy was beaming at her and she could swear his eyes actually sparkled.
"What?" she asked sharply. Beast Boy only chuckled.
"Ohhhh, nothing, Rae-Rae," he said before resuming his trip to the kitchen. Raven continued drinking her tea.
"Raven," she corrected flatly, though Robin caught the tiny tremor in her voice and the light blush in her cheeks. Once she finished her tea, Raven stood to head back to her room. Robin stopped her again.
"Raven. I still want those letters," he said. Raven only nodded. That had not been her friend, Dick Grayson. It had been Robin, apprentice to the Batman, leader of the Titans and one of the greatest martial artists and detectives in the world. Beast Boy took his place at the table as Raven left, addressing Robin with his mouth still full.
"So we're getting these guys, right?" he asked. Robin nodded.
"We are..." he said. Robin thought it might seem odd that he was protective of Raven. She was far more powerful but this... this was his world. Finding evidence, following the trail, catching the bad guy. "If Raven still had the envelopes, we'll know where they came from. If we're lucky, we can forensically determine which mail box was used... then you'll take over, Beast Boy." The green boy paused, spoon still in his mouth.
"I will?" Robin nodded, solemnly.
"If we can't trace the letter all the way to the writer forensically, we'll need you to lock onto their scent and track them. Even if the original trail is cold, it's likely close to where they live or on their way to work or something like that. Hopefully, there'll be a trail for you to follow. Then we'll decide how we should handle them, once we get a good look at them." The two young men shared dark smiles before finishing their breakfasts. Later on, Beast Boy sat in his room, tapping away at his laptop. He was just surfing to kill time, really... and to distract himself. Even though Robin had a plan, he felt like they weren't doing enough. The real problem, he thought, was the damage these letters had done to Raven's self-image. Despite the fact that she was beautiful and smart and beautiful and funny and beautiful and brave and beautiful and oh man... those eyes! And her lips! And those legs... Beast Boy shook himself... he had really gotten lost that time. Anyway, despite all of that, Raven still seemed to think that being a 'respected' notch on Aqualad's bedpost was the best she could hope for. Which seemed to defy logic considering that at least one particularly green individual (who shall remain nameless) was obviously in love with her. And she knew that! Yet somehow... she didn't know. She thought he'd lost his mind or was an idiot for loving her at all. Then he knew what he should do... he needed a second opinion. Or maybe a whole lot of them! He logged into his own fansite. He found it much less creepy to run it himself than have someone else do it. He logged into the chatroom and was greeted with a flurry of welcome messages. He issued a blanket greeting and started typing.
'Okay, Beastfans, I need your help. Does anyone here know any Raven fans?' He got several affirmative responses, one catching his eye.
'Yeah, there's a Raven blog I sometimes post on. There are tons of people on there.' Beast Boy grinned.
'Okay. I need you guys to spread the word: Raven needs a little cheering up but she doesn't visit any fansites or blogs and stuff. So we need people to send letters. Just... anyone who wants to say something nice to Raven, ask 'em to send a letter. I can't do too much myself or she'll find out, that's why I need your help' To his immense relief and satisfaction, there was another flurry of replies, all agreeing to help their hero. Some of them were also fans of Raven and declared they already had pen and paper in hand. Beast Boy thanked them profusely and stayed online, chatting for hours as a show if his gratitude. He only logged out when he was called to action with the other Titans, simply typing 'Duty calls!' and seeing a third flurry of replies, all variations of 'go get 'em', 'Titans, go!' or 'be careful'. He grinned again, logged out and sprinted out the door.
Some days later, Raven meditated in her room after breakfast, when there was a knock at her door. She glared at the gray surface.
"What?" she asked. Cyborg's voice floated through.
"Um... you got some mail, Raven." he said. Raven flinched. She had handed her offensive letters to Robin and wasn't anxious to replace them, though not all of her fan mail was so... invasive.
"Just leave it outside the door, I'll pick it up when I'm done," Raven answered, closing her eyes again.
"Yeah... no can do, Rae. You'll have to come to the common room." Raven quirked a brow... then got up and walked with Cyborg to the common room. Her eyes widened and she gasped at what she saw. They all got fan mail (if you could call hers that) and it was separated into piles for each member. Usually, they all got at least a sack of letters, though she understood most of them had contact with fans online. This time, they all sat with a sack of letters... and there were three sacks left unattended in the centre of the room. Cyborg pushed Raven toward them. They all smiled at her rare expressiveness.
"These are... all for me?" Raven asked. Cyborg nodded, smiling but surprised as well.
"Yeah, seems that way. You gonna go through 'em with us?" he asked. Raven looked up at his smiling face. Going through the fan mail was a little social exercise for the Titans, one she never got to participate in as she rarely received any. She had told herself she didn't care... but now that the opportunity was there, she couldn't deny her excitement. She reined in her surprise and gave Cyborg a small smile, nodding gently. They all sat, reading, occasionally reading a letter out loud if they thought it warranted attention. After Robin had showed them all a crayon drawing of himself, Cyborg had read out a little rhyme someone had written about them. Then Beast Boy read out a joke someone had sent him. Starfire read out a letter she had received from an astronomer, interested in her experiences flying in space. Raven eventually contributed.
"This letter is from a girl called Jessica. She is eight years old and lives right here in Jump City. Apparently, I rescued her and her older brother from a collapsing building during a fight with CInderblock. After that, she badgered her mom for a week straight until she was allowed to dye her hair... dye it purple." Raven was very quiet after that but kept reading letters. They were from all sorts of people of all ages... and they were all...nice. Not many could compete with the innocent sweetness of Jessica's letter but they were appreciated all the same. There were many more thank you letters, some simply thanking her for her work as a hero without needing rescue. Some were from people with a little knowledge of meditation or mysticism, asking questions about her powers or chakra stone. To her surprise, there were a fair few from boys (and girls) telling her how pretty she was. She thought it a little odd for strangers to tell her such things but it was still flattering. Not one letter made her flesh crawl like those letters she had passed to Robin. After a time, when the others had finished their piles, Raven took a break, heading to her room. She still had more than half to go and still needed to catch up on her interrupted meditation. Beast Boy, having separated the letters he needed or wanted to answer or keep, carried the remainder to the recycling. As he walked down the corridor, Raven stepped in front of him.
"Oh! Um... hey, Rae!" he said. Raven had her arms crossed. That rarely boded well for him.
"One thing I neglected to mention about Jessica's letter... she said she wrote it when her brother told her that I needed 'cheering up'. Apparently he had heard it online." she said, evenly. Beast Boy was panicking now.
"W-whaaat?! Who would dare say that about you, Raven?" he said. Raven's brow quirked at him.
"Who indeed...?" she said. Then there was silence. Beast Boy broke after only a few seconds.
"Okay! It was me, I admit it! But all I did was ask people to send you letters if they wanted to say anything to you. There are fansites and stuff but you never go online and-" Raven interrupted.
"There are Raven fansites? she asked. Beast Boy nodded, glad his outburst had been halted.
"Uh... yeah." There was that silence again, though it didn't seem to weigh as heavily on Beast Boy. His mail bag dropped to the floor when Raven lurched toward him, wrapping her arms around him.
"Thank you... Garfield," Raven whispered. Beast Boy blushed... then his own, shaking arms lifted and carefully embraced the demoness.
"You're welcome, Raven," he squeaked, nervously. Acting on impulse, Raven planted a gentle kiss on Beast Boy's cheek before retreating back to her bedroom. While Beast Boy stood, frozen in the corridor, Raven brought out her mirror and entered Nevermore. Here she could express her emotions without destroying her belongings. She brought out Jessica's letter again... she hadn't been completely truthful with Beast Boy: Jessica had blabbed everything her brother had said, including his plea for people to 'say something nice' to her. She found herself in Happy's realm, unsurprisingly, and felt the emotion appear next to her. She handed Happy the letter and the pink emotion read and giggled, running off to show the letter around. Raven herself sat down on the abnormally comfortable grass... and finally allowed tears to escape her eyes. Beast Boy's gesture hadn't been especially grand, certainly not compared to his rescue of her from Adonis or Robin's rescue of her during Trigon's ascendance... yet somehow, his little act of kindness had snowballed into an enormous wave of good will. And he had tried (ineffectually) to remain anonymous... he wasn't trying to ingratiate himself or earn her approval - he had done it just for her. So Raven cried. She cried tears of happiness... for the first time. She fell back, laying on the grass while crying and laughing at the same time, her heart swelling with gratitude for the green changeling. Gratitude... and a sliver of some other feeling Raven struggled to name. All she knew was that it felt warm, heavy and brought a smile to her lips. It also seemed to fill her with oddly specific curiosity.
She wondered what Beast Boy was doing right now?
Aaaaaaaaaand there you have it! So sweet you risk diabetes reading this far. Fluffy as the infinite scarf! Let me know how you like it, dudes. Peace out.
-Jack