Hello my lovelies!

I'mma keep this short but please pray for my mom, she had surgery recently and is recovering. Also THIS CHAPTER! It's gonna be FABULOUS! Katie and I came up with this really last minute plot thing but it ended up fitting into the story as a whole so much better than our original plan so we think you're going to like it! Okay, I won't take up any more of your time! Read read read!

-EmmerzK

Chapter Nineteen: Disconnected

Late that night, Hiccup pushed the front door open to his house, dragging his feet. The wind blowing in from the coast nearly blew the door off the hinges, but he held onto it tightly. Toothless walked in sluggishly behind him and immediately curled up on his large stone bed in the corner of the living room. After closing the door behind him, Hiccup hung up his coat and looked up to see Astrid creeping down the stairs in warm pajama pants and one of his shirts. The sight should have made him smile, but he could only stand and watch with a weary expression.

"Are you okay?" Astrid asked, pulling him into a hug.

"Hmmm…" He sighed, burying his face in her shoulder as he held her to his chest. "Exhausted."

"Erick?"

"He's still out. Mara's going to keep an eye on him tonight. Hopefully… hopefully he'll wake up soon."

Astrid nodded against his chest. "I tried to wash your vest. I'm not sure if I can get it back to its former glory."

Hiccup shrugged. "It's just a vest."

The conversation was light, but the tension was high. They both avoided the topic that seemed to fill their minds. But they couldn't avoid it forever. No matter how tired he was, he had to face the problems ahead. It couldn't wait.

Finally, the chief sighed. "Where are the kids?"

Astrid stepped back, brushing her bangs out of her face. "Adri's upstairs. I don't know if she's still awake."

"And Finn?"

His wife remained silent, staring at the floor with unblinking eyes.

Hiccup frowned. "Astrid?"

Astrid straightened her shoulders, donning a firm expression. Hiccup didn't know what that meant; she was good at hiding nervous expressions, but he knew by the wringing of her hands that whatever she was about to say couldn't bode well.

"He's gone."

Hiccup blinked, sure he'd heard wrong. The words played over in his mind again and again, but he couldn't seem to understand. He rubbed his eyes tiredly and tried again. "What?"

Astrid swallowed. "Hiccup, he left on Thornado after the operation."

His world tipped upside down. Gone? A world without Finn? Hiccup backed up a few steps. "No."

Astrid stepped after him, her hands held out in a placating gesture. "Hiccup, I know this isn't what you expected but he needs this."

"Where did he go?" Hiccup demanded, suddenly very much alert. Toothless sat up from his bed. "Did he say?"

"No. Hiccup, stop," Astrid pushed the door closed when he opened it a crack. "This was his choice."

"There's a storm coming, Astrid! I wouldn't let anyone fly through that, but our son? Why would you let him go?" Hiccup asked, his eyes wide. "How could you do that?"

"He'll find somewhere to land; he's smart. Hiccup, he needs to figure things out. He needs to step away and you need the-"

"The what?" Hiccup cut her off, desperation lacing his voice. "The stress of not knowing where my son is? The anxiety of knowing that anything could happen to him out there and we'd never know?"

Astrid exhaled slowly. "Hiccup. Finn is confused about a lot of things right now. He's angry at himself and he's remorseful at everything he's done. Truly, he is. But he felt it best that he take a step back for a time. He didn't want you to worry about him while Erick is in trouble."

Hiccup clapped his hands over his face, shaking his head. "I told him to leave…" He whimpered, voice laced in anguish. "I didn't want him to leave Berk!"

"Hiccup-" Astrid stepped forward.

"N-no, no." Hiccup walked away, pulling on his hair. Astrid followed, trying to grab his arm as he gradually sounded more frantic. "I was angry with him, no, I was furious, and I told him to go away, but I didn't want him to LEAVE!"

"Hiccup!" Astrid stopped him. She tried to pry his hands from his face. "This isn't your fault. He made his choice. And I think it's good for him. He needs to decide for himself who he is and what he wants."

Hiccup sat down on the couch wearily. "Don't you remember what happened to him last time he left?"

Astrid stared at him morosely. "Of course, I do," she replied as she took a seat beside him. "But he's not a little boy anymore. He's smart, he's strong. He has Thornado."

"He's lost and alone, Astrid!" Hiccup whimpered, trying to withhold the emotion threatening to spill over. "He doesn't need to go gallivanting across the archipelago to prove anything because he'll just remember how alone he is! What if he never comes back! What would we do!"

"Hiccup, you have to trust that he'll come back," Astrid held his face.

"He needs to be home now!" Hiccup cried, tears flowing down his face now. "I couldn't handle it if we lost him, Astrid! I cannot handle the thought of losing both of my boys in one day!"

Astrid pulled him into a tight hug, pushing her husband's face into her shoulder. "You won't. Both of them are going to be okay." Hiccup's shoulders shook in her arms. She kissed his cheek tenderly. The day had been a long one—he hadn't slept well the night before and today had been a never-ending flurry of stressful, hair raising activity. Her poor husband had officially reached his limit as to what he could handle. She hadn't known what his response would be as to Finn's absence, but she suspected it might be this.

She held her husband for a long while until he gradually began to relax and his tears subsided. Exhaustion crept on both of them and she finally pressed her mouth to his ear gently. "You need to sleep."

Hiccup sniffed as he sat up, wiping his face. "I don't know if I can."

"You need to. I'll make us some chamomile and we'll go to bed." Astrid kissed his forehead before she stood and walked to the kitchen.

Hiccup sighed, heading to the stairs. "I'm going to change and check on Addie."

"Okay."

The Haddock patriarch marched up the stairs and walked into the master bedroom. Pulling a change of comfortable night clothes out of his drawer, he sat at the edge of their bed and stared at the floor in the dark. Images flashed in his mind: memories of a bloody duel, a tragic accident at a barn, and now an innocent boy caught up in the aftermath of a gang his own son had started, now lying in a bed fighting fevers and blood loss and infection. And now, Finn was gone, alone in the dark and cold with only his dragon for company.

Hiccup pressed the flats of his hands into his eyes until his vision went fuzzy, trying to stem the images. He prayed fervently his son would be all right, that Thornado would take care of his boy. His little man was so lost and so confused that he'd spiraled out of control. Hiccup never thought that he might go to Erick for revenge, since he had told him about the gang and Finn's involvement. But when he found Finn at the scene and had time to think things over after the fact, he was furious for himself for not thinking to find Erick. He didn't regret searching for his daughter at all because Cliff had found him en route. But his soul ached for the youngest Larson, a boy who'd become as close as a son to him over the years.

He'd promised Olaf to protect his little boy. He never would have thought that his own son would be the one to test that.

Footsteps broke the silence and Astrid brushed past him. He heard the sound of two mugs being set down on the bedside table. The bed shifted as his wife folded her legs beside him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"He's going to be fine."

Hiccup rubbed his face and exhaled. "How can you be sure?"

"Because he's our son: he has Haddock and Hofferson blood in his veins. He's been trained for survival and fighting by me and Gobber for the last two years." Astrid replied. "And he has Thornado with him, a veteran dragon who had a chieftain of his own as a rider. I have faith that he'll come home."

Hiccup sighed, "I hope you're right. I want him to come home."

"He will."

Hiccup kissed her temple before standing and quickly changing clothes, throwing the very dirty items in their hamper. "I'll check on Addie and I'll be back."

"Okay."

Hiccup quietly walked down the hall and tapped his knuckles against her door. "Addie?" Cracking the door open, he poked his head in.

Adrianna was laid out on her bed, facing the opposite wall. Books and laundry were strewn around the room in various locations. Hiccup tiptoed forward and smiled gingerly at his daughter. Her lips were slightly parted as she slept, eyelashes gently resting against pale cheeks. Her eyes were puffy and the remains of dried tears streaked down her face. She'd changed into comfortable pajamas but hadn't taken off her shoes for some odd reason.

Hiccup smiled to himself, wondering how she could do that. Carefully he pulled off her boots and laid a blanket over her. The movements and gentle breeze caused her to stir, but she hummed in her sleep, cuddled the blanket and curled up into a ball. Hiccup breathed a short laugh and kissed her temple.

"Good night, baby."

After blowing out the candle at her bedside, Hiccup gently closed the door behind him and rejoined his wife in their bedroom. He vaguely thought to himself that he should drink the tea his wife had made, but before he knew it, he dropped face first into his pillow. He barely registered Astrid's muffled laugh as she drew the covers over him, but his consciousness was slipping. The last thing he thought was the sickening realization that his only son was out there somewhere, alone in the dark and cold with nothing but guilt as his companion.

Under normal circumstances, a late night flight through a torrential storm would've been cool. But not today. Finn usually liked to go out with a bang, but this wasn't exactly what he had in mind.

Thunder boomed overhead as torrents of rain drenched him and as his dragon while they flew. The fierce winds and jarring claps of thunder forced him to lie flat on his belly in the saddle so he wouldn't become (more) disoriented and slip off. Thornado dodged and ducked and weaved through the storm clouds, but Finn could tell his poor friend was tiring quickly.

"Thornado!" Finn yelled over the noise. "We've gotta land!"

He wasn't sure if his dragon heard, but he too seemed eager to get back to the ground. Thornado instantly dove, forcing Finn to grip the saddle reigns tighter lest he slip off. He wouldn't want to get lost at sea after an untimely demise of getting a faceful of ocean due to falling off his saddle. He didn't have high hopes for his future at the moment, but he didn't want to die either.

Lightning struck just past Thornado's right wing, and the Thunderdrum roared in fear. He tried to adjust his flight pattern accordingly to dodge, but the sudden flash of light and following sonic boom, combined with the rain which obscured their vision, the dragon couldn't handle it.

They dropped.

Finn yelped in shock, grappling the reins as his stomach jumped into his throat. Thornado roared angrily, flapping frantically to regain altitude, but they were falling fast. They emerged out of the clouds at breakneck speed, the ocean looming below. Finn was both thankful and annoyed that the rain dissipated beneath the clouds: he could see the danger coming, but it was both a pro and a con. If he was going to die, he'd rather not see it coming.

If he wasn't the son of the two best dragon riders in the entirety of the Archipelago, he might not have survived. But Finn yanked himself back into the saddle, pulled back on the reins as hard as he could and yelled, "UP, UP, UP!"

Thornado roared at the ocean defiantly, spreading his wings until finally, they caught air. The duo shot across the water at breakneck speeds, water flying up around them in both directions. Finn gulped in the air, willing his blood pressure to regulate. He vaguely remembered his father and Toothless had shown them a trick like that before… back when they were a family and everything was all right.

"We gotta find land, Thornado," Finn said, looking at the storm clouds still raging overhead. Thornado huffed in agreement, his breathing rapid. Finn scratched his dragon's side patiently. "Sorry…"

He knew his friend was exhausted. They'd been flying for hours without stopping and had passed by any small islands on the way. Plus Thornado was older, Finn being his second rider. Old age in and of itself had to make him tired.

Finn's stomach rumbled. He knew his dragon had to be hungry too. Thornado sniffed the air for a few minutes before angling his body to the southwest. The teenager rested his forehead against his dragon's scaly neck and closed his eyes, breathing in the salty air.

It seemed like forever, but finally Thornado growled at him. Finn sat up tiredly and blinked at the dot on the horizon. Eventually, an island came into view, complete with a port, village, Meade Hall and arena. Finn looked down at the darkened village, noting the twinkling torch lights posted throughout the streets. He spotted sentries stationed in varying locations.

"Where are we?" Finn murmured.

The village looked vaguely familiar, but he couldn't place the name. He was too tired, wet, and hungry to care. Even though the rain was thinning, it left behind a sweet-smelling moisture that clung to his skin and clothes. He desperately wanted to change. Luckily his father had long ago invented a material that was waterproof, so his extra changes of clothes and sleeping bag were dry. He couldn't say the same for his weapons. He hoped his bow and quiver of arrows weren't ruined from the harsh elements, but he supposed this was part of survival.

They soared over the village, avoiding guards and watchtowers, choosing to stay in the shadows. Finn directed his dragon to the woods about a mile away from the village. They touched down in an open field that seemed to be deserted aside from a few coyotes that scampered off into the dark. Finn made a note that where there were coyotes, there had to be rabbits, foxes, deer and other delectable delights. At the moment he was simply too tired to hunt, but if he decided to stay here (wherever here was), at least he'd have plenty of food options. For now, he'd just eat whatever he'd grabbed from the house.

"Ughhh…" Finn moaned once he slid off his dragon. His limbs felt like noodles after riding for so long. He honestly didn't know how his father had done nothing all as a teenager but ride all day, every day. It was taxing! "All right, let's take this off."

It took about ten minutes to undo the various leather straps and harnesses, but finally Finn got the saddle off Thornado's back. The dragon promptly flipped onto his back and began scratching his scales into the dirt and grass.

"Sorry, man. Wet leather makes you itchy." Finn sighed. "We should have touched down sooner."

Thornado's itching stilled and his flat look said, And where exactly would we have touched down, stupidhead?

"Touché, smarty-pants," Finn quipped. Rummaging through his pack, he located a bag of dried meat and put a piece in his mouth. "Mmm… should've brought the honeyed ham. Mkay, let's see what we've got…"

It took him close to a half hour, but despite his exhaustion, Finn was able to set up a camp of sorts. He still wondered in the back of his mind what island they'd invaded, but he figured if they'd been flying for around 9 hours, they were still in the Archipelago enough to know they hadn't trespassed into enemy territory. Probably.

A makeshift tent under a tree with his sleeping bag, a circlet of stones for a fire, which burned gloriously with some hot water in a tin can, a piece of bread with melted cheese and more dried meat, and a large broken stick on which his wet clothes hung. Finally the rain had stopped; he hoped by morning they'd be dry so he could continue his journey to… wherever he was going.

And it was with that glum thought that he sat on the ground, poking a stick into his fire with his dragon snoozing nearby, that Fearless Finn realized how great his life had been. How much he'd taken for granted: a home cooked meal; a mother who cooked for and cleaned up after him every day, even washed his clothes; his sister's annoying chatter was at least something to occupy the silence when he didn't feel like talking; his dad's wise council, even when unwarranted, with his firm gaze and steady hand, always there when he was needed.

He really was a terrible son. He hadn't realized just how much he counted on his dad for things. He'd taken everything good in his life for granted, but his dad… he'd allowed so many things to fill up his head. It was like continually dumping leftovers into a trash bin but never taking out the trash. Eventually the trash bin starts to smell rank with a rotten interior. The outside of the trash can could be decorated with all the pomp and circumstance a man could muster, but if the interior was filthy, what did it matter?

So, he thought miserably. I've reduced myself to that of trash. Never thought it would come to this.

His heart twisted in his chest painfully when he thought of the terrible things he'd done—nearly impoverished dozens of family's by ruining their homes or workplaces, lied, stole, cheated, broke hearts. And now, he could very well be a murderer. Erick hadn't been pushed directly into the machine: Finn knew this. But he didn't dare even entertain the thought of excusing his behaviors. If it weren't for him, Erick would still have two feet. He wouldn't be crippled for life. He wouldn't be potentially lying on his death bed.

Finn dropped the stick and buried his face in his knees. He missed Berk. He missed his home, his room, which tended to be his only place of solace where he could let his emotions run dry. He hated those nights. He missed his mom. Deep down, he missed his dad too. He wished there was something he could do to gain his forgiveness.

I don't want to hear it, his father had said, his voice shaking in anger. Get out of my sight.

His father was officially done. There'd been no love in his eyes in that moment. He'd officially broken all ties of reconciliation because of what he did to Erick. He didn't even have the heart to be jealous anymore. A brief part of him wondered if their roles were reversed, would Hiccup speak so harshly to Erick if Finn had been hurt?

For so long, Finn thought the strength of a man was defined by his status—how he looked to his peers, how he led them, or how perfect his skills were. Finn had the status. He was the future chief after all, and sweet Thor, that was an amazing thing. He'd always felt that sense of pride that one day he'd be chief. That was his destiny: to lead the people of Berk.

His father had been trying to tell him for a long time now that life isn't about being the best or coolest or strongest. If you fight your way to the top but have no family, no friends, what is that? If you're wealthy and powerful but alone, what kind of sad reality would that be to live? A man is wealthiest when he's kind and giving; if a man has nothing, but treats others with the utmost care and compassion, even those who hurt him, he is greater than any wealthy man in the world.

That was Benen.

Never had he heard Benen raise his voice, unless it was joyful laughter. Not once had he raised a hand against another human unless it was self defense. But all the same, it was done with respect for the other person. Benen had loved people, despite his scars—both physical and emotional. He poured his heart and soul into people. He'd been dirt poor, scarred from head to toe with the worst of what life had to offer, alone and weak. But with a single word, he'd shown Finn more love and care than any other person had shown.

That was what made him special.

Tears burned his eyes. Exhaustion finally began to creep in as all the images and thoughts of the day flew through his mind. Sounds of screaming, yelling, and images of bloody wounds bombarded his mind, coupled with his lack of sleep the night before in the jail—he couldn't hold back the wave of emotion billowing out of his system.

Finn tried to stifle the sobs to no avail. He buried his face farther into his knees as everything that had happened washed over him once again. He'd nearly killed Erick. If it hadn't happened already, he could die at any moment. He'd run away from home for the second time in his life and he was positive that his father would never allow him to come back. There was nothing he could do to change the past. He'd live with this reality for the rest of his life that he, Fearless Finn Haddock, was very much afraid and he could do nothing to mend his mistakes. This time, he truly was alone. And he'd brought it upon himself.

Apparently Hiccup's body could only handle so much strain. Once asleep, he had remained as such until nearly noon the next morning. Even then, he nearly dragged himself out of his bed and dressed himself. By the time he was descending the stairs, he felt his head clearing on its own. Evidently a full night's sleep had done him good.

Astrid was out of the house. This was no surprise; she had Academy duties to attend to most days. That was where she worked full time once the twins were old enough to take care of themselves. Hiccup hated that life had to go on in this way. A part of him direly wanted to pack up and search for Finn himself but he pushed down such thoughts. A chief's duty, as Stoick was fond of saying, is to his people. No one would fault Hiccup for sleeping in but they certainly might have something to say if he locked himself in the house and refused visitors or flew gods knew how far away to retrieve his errant son. Both those reactions briefly tempted him but he pushed them down.

Toothless had apparently left the house. No surprises there. Hiccup hadn't been expecting him to hang around and wait for his exhausted human to wake up. The Hooligan chief decided, as he walked into town, to get some lunch at the Great Hall. Surely his friends would be there. He needed the support.

The first thing Hiccup saw when he pushed open the doors of the Great Hall was Brandyn. The normally cheerful teenager was stabbing his potatoes with vigor, a scowl on his face. Several teenagers surrounded him, including a few who had been caught with the gang, but he didn't seem to hear a thing anyone said.

"Something on your mind?" Hiccup asked him, sitting next to Dana, who made a face and scooted over to give him room.

"You could say that." Brandyn muttered darkly.

"He's upset because he had an argument with Anna this morning." Dana filled Hiccup in, looking thoroughly irritated that at his interruption.

"Did you?" Hiccup asked with interest.

"Well it's weird, isn't it?" Brandyn blurted out. "She went straight to Erick's first thing, didn't even stop to get breakfast! And when I told her to take a break, she yelled at me!"

"Erick was her best friend for years, Brandyn." Hiccup gently countered. "It's natural that she'd want to make sure he's okay. That doesn't really have anything to do with you."

"But I'm not even allowed back there!" Brandyn griped. "Family and close friends only. Mara won't let me in. She told me that unless I'm injured myself, I'm not even allowed in the house."

"No extra contaminants." Hiccup nodded. "Don't take it personally."

"I'll take it as personally as I want when my own girlfriend is more interested in spending time with another guy." Brandyn said defensively. "Not to sound possessive but it's weird."

"I see where you're coming from." Hiccup patiently. "But you really shouldn't take this personally. She's always thrown herself a little too much into caring for others. And with their history, of course she's going to want to do everything she can for her friend."

"Well she said she's staying there all day whether I like it or not." Brandyn stabbed a potato wedge with so much gusto, he nearly cracked the plate in half.

Hiccup looked between Brandyn and Dana, both of whom seemed to be seething. Dana kept looking up at Brandyn and glaring at him as she worked on her soup. What was up with them? It appeared that Adrianna wasn't the only person Brandyn had argued with that morning.

Before he could consider this further, he heard Morgan speak up from her seat next to Brandyn. "When is Cale going to get out of jail?"

"Um..." Hiccup shook his head to attempt to clear up his mind. "Ah, another week, I think. And then he's got a lot of hard labor to do. I don't think you two will have a lot of time for each other."

Morgan wrinkled her nose in irritation and didn't press the issue. It was Thorein who spoke up next.

"I heard Finn left yesterday." he said, pointing his fork at Hiccup. "That true?"

Hiccup felt his heart constrict but he nodded. "Needed to be alone for a bit, yeah."

"Oh." Thorein looked disappointed. "I thought that was just a stupid rumor."

"Good riddance." Evan muttered just loud enough for Hiccup to hear. The Hooligan chief chose to ignore that comment.

"Not a rumor." Hiccup confirmed. "Just a... sabbatical."

"And you're not going after him?" Brandyn asked, looking suddenly interested.

"No." Hiccup told him. "This is something he needs to do alone. Although... Brandyn, I know you do Academy stuff but did you want to make some more money? I'm pretty sure Gobber could use some help while Finn's away."

Brandyn brightened considerably. "That would be great. Perfect place to work, really, smack dab in the middle of the village. Think people will know my name after a while?"

"I have no doubt." Hiccup forced a smile. "I'm going to go talk to Addie. Anything you want me to say?"

"Yeah. I miss her." Brandyn said quite seriously. "She's been preoccupied ever since Erick moved in. I get that. But it's like... she's changed. I don't know what it is but I want her to talk to me."

"I... will attempt to articulate that without it being awkward." Hiccup smirked and got up from the table.

When he had collected some food, he made his way over to Mara's. Lily was sunbathing outside of the house, looking rather lethargic. It seemed as if she'd been there all day, perhaps hoping that her human would come out for a flight. Charger was also trotting about rather aimlessly. All of the energy he usually possessed seemed to have been drained. The poor Nadder clearly missed his boy. Hiccup stopped to pat his snout.

"He'll be okay to fly soon, buddy." he said soothingly to the dragon. "I know you're scared. I am too. But he'll be okay." Charger nuzzled his hand for a few seconds before turning away to snuggle with Lily.

Hiccup knocked on the door. To his surprise, it was Inga who opened it.

"Are you here to see Erick?" she asked in a businesslike tone.

"Uhh... yeah. I am." Hiccup raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing here?"

"Helping out." Inga replied shortly, stepping aside to let him in. "Mara said I have a clear head in a crisis and that one of her assistants quit last week because of all the strain."

"I don't blame her." Hiccup nodded. "This line of work definitely isn't for everyone."

"That's what Mara said." Inga agreed. "So now it's my job."

"And your parents are okay with this?"

"Well... my mom's okay with it. My dad..." Inga shrugged. "He doesn't really have any say in the matter; it's my decision where I want to work."

"Yeah, I didn't think he'd be too keen on his only daughter in this field. It's hard work." Hiccup washed his hands in the basin near the door. "Definitely not something I'd want to do full time."

"I think you've got enough on your plate. Well, Erick's back here." Inga gestured to a corner of the room where a large, heavy curtain had been hung. "He's been a bit feverish as of late. Mara said it's not too serious right now but Anna has been applying cool cloths since eight this morning."

Hiccup was slightly surprised. Eight was a bit early for Adrianna. He thanked Inga and walked up to the curtain. He could hear his daughter's soft voice clearly. After a moment, he realized that she was singing. It was a soothing song, an optimistic one well known to the people of Berk. But it was his daughter's voice that made Hiccup pause. He hadn't heard her sing since she was very young and he remembered that she'd been pretty good, even as a toddler. But this was different. Her voice was more mature, more steady, more skillful... and more beautiful. Hiccup had no idea she was that good. He could have stood outside the curtain and listened to her all day. Instead, he pushed it aside. The song ceased.

"Dad?" Adrianna turned to look at him and he was taken aback at how tired she looked. "What are you doing here?"

"Checking on you two." Hiccup sat down in a chair next to his daughter, his eyes fixed on Erick. "How's he doing?"

"Bit feverish. But he hasn't gotten any worse." Adrianna gently wiped the sweat off his face. "Magnus was here last night. And Gustav will be around at two. Mara said he needs constant care to make sure he's breathing."

"I'll sign up if there are any shifts available." Hiccup offered. "But I was more interested in making sure you're okay."

"I'm fine." Adrianna said dismissively. "Doesn't matter."

"Yes it does." Hiccup placed his hand on top of her free one. "You're important too."

"Not as important as him."

"Yes you are." Hiccup said so forcefully, Adrianna looked at him. He felt his lip quiver slightly. "Finn's gone. Erick's recovering. You..." he attempted to swallowing the growing lump in his throat. "You're the only one left."

The Haddock girl quickly applied a fresh, cool cloth to Erick's forehead before turning around to face her father. She grasped his hand and squeezed it.

"I'm not going anywhere." she assured him soothingly.

"I love you, Addie." Hiccup kissed her forehead. "I don't ever want you to forget that. Or think it isn't true, even for a second."

"Why so affectionate?" Adrianna asked.

"Because I don't say it enough." Hiccup brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "And you deserve to hear it every day."

Adrianna paused for a long time, apparently bothered by a thought that had popped into her head. Hiccup waited patiently.

Finally she spoke up. "Why?"

"Why... what?"

"Why do you love me so much?" she whispered in a trembling voice, apparently nervous about asking. "Why did you keep loving me after I got so mad at you?"

Hiccup smiled warmly. "Love is a choice, Addie. Loving someone means always wanting the best for them. Making sacrifices for them. Forgiving them when they make mistakes and sometimes making difficult choices for their benefit." he tapped her nose with the tip of his finger like he used to do when she was tiny. "And you're special. You're my one and only girl."

Adrianna smiled. "I love you too, daddy."

Despite his heavy heart, despite how miserable he was, despite the overwhelming difficulties that were yet to come, Hiccup felt a rush of joy to hear those words.

Finn came to with birds chirping overhead and sunlight streaming into his tent. He moaned as he rolled onto his side, wincing at the stiffness in his neck and shoulders. He gradually came back to the land of the living when he realized it had to be close to nine in the morning. He never slept this late. He rolled up his sleeping bag and climbed out of his tent. Thornado grumbled at him from nearby, clearly ready to get a move on.

"Sorry…" Finn mumbled. His dragon stared at him with beady eyes, clearly annoyed. "What? Fish got your tongue?"

Thornado growled lowly before flapping his wings impatiently.

"Well excuse me," Finn grumped. "I didn't mean to sleep this late. What's the rush anyway? We can't go back and we don't exactly have a destination in mind. Unless that's your issue."

Thornado huffed and stomped away, disappearing into the bushes. Finn watched him go guiltily, wishing he hadn't been so smart-mouthed. Thornado was the only friend he had left, the only thing tying him to Berk and his past. He couldn't let him leave. Usually he always had a plan and Thornado was happy to obey as long as they indeed had a plan. No plan, no compliance. That's what he and his father had joked back in the day.

"Wait!" Finn called, stopping to yank on his boots and grab his leather jacket. Since fall was coming, the morning air had a bite to it. "Thornado, wait up! Don't leave me here alone!"

A derisive dragon chortle sounded up ahead, as if to say Yeah, because everyone else left you.

The teenager sprinted through the trees after his dragon, leaving his camp behind. He figured they'd be able to find it from the air no problem, once he apologized to his friend. He was sad and lonely enough and nobody cared about him; he didn't want Thornado to hate him too.

Finally he caught up to the large blue beast. "Hey! Would you stop for a minute?" Finn ran in front, stopping him with an outstretched hand. He vaguely wondered if he looked like his dad when he did that, but he shook off the thought. He wasn't the Great Dragon Master like his father. He was his ridiculously immature son who nobody wanted around.

"I'm sorry," Finn began. "I'm trying, okay? I don't know where I'm going or what I'm doing."

Thornado grumbled deeply, as if to say That's the problem, stupid boy. You never think these things through.

"Well what was I supposed to do? Be the black cloud hanging over everybody's head?"

Thornado faced north, snapping his jaws. You should've stayed.

"Why? To stress my dad out further? What would he have done? Is there anything he can do for me anymore?"

Running doesn't solve problems, said Thornado's flat expression.

Finn huffed, running his hands through his hair. That was his problem—digging himself into a deep hole just to run away from the destruction, leaving everyone else to clean up his messes. He wouldn't go home. His dad would surely kick him right back out. His dad didn't want to hear what he had to say; he'd run out of chances. The road was his new doorstep.

"We have to keep moving, Thornado." Finn sighed tiredly, despite just waking up. Already the day was wearing him down. "I can't go back. Maybe… maybe I can get a job smithing, maybe somewhere south. Travel around a bit, learn a few things. Maybe I'll come back and try to make amends in a few years."

Thornado grunted disapprovingly and slapped his side with a wing. Stupid boy.

Finn thought for a moment. "I'm not going back… but you can." Thornado gave him a look of disdain. "I mean it. Might scare my mom a bit if you came home without me, but you could tell them I'm fine. If you don't want to go on this grand adventure with me, I won't force you. I can't be a control freak anymore or force anyone to do something they don't want."

Thornado stepped forward and pushed his snout under Finn's hand. He growled softly, the teen's fingers vibrating under the scaly face. I'm not going anywhere.

Finn forced a smile, but was genuinely grateful. "Thanks."

A yell echoed through the trees. Finn turned, eyebrows raised. No one was there but he sensed they'd traveled closer to the village than he'd realized. Again he wondered what island they'd traveled to.

"Should we find out where we are?" Thornado grunted in assent, and together they turned the sound.

Within a few minutes they found a small troupe of men walking in the woods with axes and shovels. They were laughing and joking around, oblivious to the onlookers nearby. A few dragons followed closely behind the group, snapping fish out of the air that were thrown over shoulders.

Finn breathed a sigh of relief. "An island friendly to dragons can't be that bad for us then." He looked passed the trees at the few houses that were visible. "Come on, then."

The village was already bustling with people, young and old. But Finn noticed quickly that this village was more of a trade route than an independent island, like Berk. Traders mingled with the common-folk like seashells on a sandy beach. While most people were natives, the people who stood out were the tradesmen, wearing clothes of vibrant colors and styles that Finn had never seen before. People called out to him from every side to sell him their goods, foods and drinks. Despite his deep sadness, Finn couldn't help but feel a twinge of wanderlust in his chest. Curiosity spiked his interest and it was all he could do to not run from booth to booth.

He gave Thornado a short glance. "This is what my dad loved as a kid, wasn't it?"

Thornado gave him a nod, puffing a fishy-smelling breath in his face.

"I can see the appeal." Finn murmured, waving a hand. But he wasn't here to shop. He just wanted to figure out where he was and make a plan.

Holding his money bag tighter on his belt in case of pickpockets, he strode down the middle of the street. He blocked out the sounds of people calling to him. He brushed past people, keeping his head down as he walked. He was only interested in finding out where he was, but he didn't want to ask anyone in such a populated area. If word got out that the heir to Berk's throne was gallivanting across the Archipelago… Well, some would probably pay a pretty penny for him. He would know—it had happened before.

Of course, the scumbags hadn't known he'd been the Berkian prince. They hadn't known how much trouble they were getting themselves into. And as a little runt himself, he hadn't known just how many horrors he'd have to live with, even eight years later. At any rate, this island didn't look to have slave traders. But one couldn't be too careful.

If only he'd thought beforehand to cover his mop of wily red hair in a bustling village square.

"Finn?"

The teen stopped in his tracks, whipping around at the woman's voice. A tall, lithe woman with a poufy mane of red curls stood there with a confused expression, clad in leather and armor with a sword strapped to her hip. Finn stared back at her, trying to place her. But it wasn't until he saw the crest of an eagle on the pommel of her sword that he recognized the chief and her island.

"Kara," Finn sighed in relief. "Kara the Kind."

So, they'd traveled all the way to Brawn. Finn had met the chieftess multiple times, seeing as she and his father were allied chieftains in the United Archipelagan Pact. He'd only visited Brawn a few times himself, but he'd been pretty young. His father and the council had stopped their group at Brawn for a night when traveling for chieftain meetings a few years back, before the sickness broke out and everything good in his sorry life was snatched away.

Kara stepped forward in shock. "It is you," she smiled. "I saw you walking by as I was talking to Joh-"

"Master Finn!" A tall bearded man emerged at her side so suddenly that Finn had to step back.

"Trader Johann! What a… pleasant surprise." Finn attempted a smile, sure it came out as a grimace instead.

"Yes, well I might say the same for you!" The man shook Finn's hand enthusiastically. "I can't say I expected to see you so soon, since I'll be headed to Berk in a few days time."

Finn gulped. "Really? That's… quaint."

Kara glanced around. "Where's your father? I wasn't aware your family would be visiting."

"Oh no," Finn shook his head as he shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at his boots. "Just me… takin' a lil' vacay. Alone. Yeah…"

Kara narrowed her eyes. "Alone? Why? Is something wrong?"

Finn bit his lip, unsure what to say. He glanced at Thornado, who was sniffing around a basket of cod nearby.

The chieftess took in the boy's clothes, his overall rumpled appearance and bedraggled expression. Dark bags circled under his eyes, which remained on the ground or darted around various things. That was a strange sight. For as long as she had known the Haddock family, Adrianna had always been the shyer one. Finn always stood up straight and looked everyone in the eye. He walked with purpose and almost an air of dignity—he knew who he was and what he wanted. He treated people with respect and honor, and for such a small boy, expected to be treated as such as well. It had been both admirable and humorous, coming from a five-year-old.

Nothing about this young man spoke Fearless Finn Haddock to her. Something was wrong.

"Finn, are you all right?" Kara stepped forward, motherly instincts kicking in. She rested a hand on his forehead, but he stepped back, almost nervously. She was surprised by his clammy skin.

"Um… I-I'm fine."

"You don't look fine. Did something happen?"

A spark of panic flashed across his face and he shakily exhaled. He knew he couldn't lie. "Yes. B-but I'm okay. Really, I have my dragon. I'm fine."

Kara looked at the strangely quiet Johann, watching the exchange with concern. "Are your parents all right? Your sister?"

"As far as I know… They were when I… left."

"Why did you leave?"

Irritation rose to the boy's face and Kara knew she was pushing it. An angry Fearless Finn was never a good thing. "I told you I'm fine, ma'am."

A smile flashed across Kara's face. "So formal. All right, I won't nag. Have you eaten today?"

"No," Finn admitted. He honestly didn't feel like eating though, which was strange. He hated going through the day without eating a good breakfast, yet the thought of eating turned his stomach. "I'll eat later."

Johann finally spoke up. "Now Master Finn, you know as well as I do that even if you've struck on your own for a time, I could not in good conscience send you off without a proper meal first. Let's head over to the tavern over yonder and we'll get some hot food in your belly."

"I-I don't know, Johann, I'm really not-"

"At least have some hot soup, Finn." Kara pressed. "The day's going to get chillier and I'd feel happier knowing you have something in your system. Please?"

Finn stared at the adults with wide eyes. He could feel his walls coming down, no matter how hard he'd tried to resurrect them. At long last, he nodded. "Okay."

"Good lad." Johann gently grasped his arm and pulled him in the direction of the tavern. "Now under normal circumstances I would never take a minor into a tavern, especially you. Your father would have my hide."

"But?" Finn asked glumly. He vaguely heard the chink of Kara's armor behind them as they walked. He almost wished she'd get called away by a random visitor, but of course nobody seemed to need the chieftess at the moment.

"But this here is the best tavern this side of the northern Archipelago and I bet you Odin's good eye that you've never had a proper stew than Mary's." Johann grinned, shoving the door open and calling into the building, "Mary, my dear, a table for three if you please!"

Finn ducked his head, again wishing for some kind of hat. He should have brought a hooded cape or something. He waited for someone to call out his name, but nobody seemed to pay him any attention. Johann steered him toward an empty table in the back corner where a waitress pointed.

The trio sat down, Finn ducking his face into his open palm miserably. There was nothing more embarrassing than being dragged into a packed restaurant with Trader Johann, on whom surely every eye in the building would soon be turned because he'd have a fantastical story going in the next few minutes.

"So Finn," Johann began. "Training any dragons with your father recently?"

"No."

"How's training going? Last I was on Berk, I heard you started battle strategy."

"Fine."

"Is your sister-"

Kara rested a hand on the trader's arm. "Johann, you're smothering the boy."

"Ah, apologies my lad."

Finn sighed, staring down at the grimy floorboards. The longer he was here, the sadder and more depressed he seemed to get. Laughter echoed off the walls, children giggled as their parents made flying dragons with full forks, aiming for hungry mouths. Everything around him screamed HAPPINESS, and he just wasn't feeling it. Everything in his life had turned dull, gray, and void.

"Hi Chief, Johann. Can I get you three anything?"

Finn looked up through his bangs with a bored expression, but he straightened out of his slouch when he saw the beautiful waitress standing at the table. Her dark hair was pulled back in a bun with small braids woven through; bright blue eyes glittered down at him with a soft, genuine smile. If Finn had been standing, he was sure his knees would've wobbled. She was seriously beautiful, but in a completely natural way. There was nothing regal about her; only kindness could be seen in her eyes.

"Hello Raine," Kara was saying through the haze. "I'll just have a water, thanks. Johann?"

"I'll take a cup of hot tea, dear and a bowl of your finest stew, if you please." Johann smiled.

"No problem. For you?" Raine turned her oceanic eyes on him and Finn blinked out of his stupor.

"Oh, um… water and stew's fine. Thanks." Finn smiled up at her sheepishly, unsure where this newfound shyness had come from. Sure he was pretty depressed and hated his life, but usually he was pretty smooth with girls. This one didn't looked to be much older than him, maybe seventeen or eighteen. But when it came to flirting, age never made of a difference to him.

"All right, I'll go put that order in. Hang tight, I'll be back." Raine shot him a final smile before bustling off.

Finn forced himself to look back at the table as she walked away, purposefully ignoring the two adults sitting beside him and praying to the gods above that they hadn't noticed his denial of having the hots for their waitress.

"Finn, I'm going to cut to the chase," Kara finally broke the silence after a few minutes. "Do you need somewhere to stay?"

Finn stared at her, stunned.

"Because I know that look. I won't press for details, I won't even ask what happened. But it's obvious by the look on your face that you need to be away from home for a while," Kara said. "And I cannot in good conscience allow you to sleep in a tent in the middle of the woods or on the back of your dragon. My house has plenty of extra room-"

"No, no, no, I couldn't-" Finn began.

"Yes, you can. My home was originally built to house visiting chieftains and their families because Brawn is part of the trade route. We get a lot of visitors of royal blood. Stay at my house as long as you need, you'll have your own room and a bed and hot food. You won't get sick staying in the elements because, as of right now, you don't look so good."

Finn felt his forehead. He didn't feel cold, so he wasn't feverish. "Whatever."

"Honey, look at me." Finn's eyes met Kara's. "Our families have known each other for a long time. Your father and I go way back, being children of chieftains ourselves. It's not an easy road to walk. I understand the pain and hardship at times. I know sometimes you just have to leave the house. But you're not alone here. Let me help you and when you decide what you want to do, I'll step back. I just don't want anything bad to happen to you while I know I could help."

Finn stared at her in surprise, her face open in genuine concern. He didn't have anywhere to go; he had so many issues, he hated to drag her into it. He knew from experience with his own royal family that she had to be very busy. She didn't need a troubled teen under her roof when her own kids couldn't be that old. He didn't care if he got sick or slept outside. But the pleading look on her face, he couldn't say no. Somehow it reminded him of his mother.

"Okay." he said at last

"Good." Kara relaxed just as Raine returned with a tray of drinks and two steaming bowls of stew.

"Hope it's to your liking." Raine said amiably.

Finn took a small bite and his eyebrows flew upward. "You don't happen to have the recipe, do you?"

"You cook?" asked Raine, looking slightly amused. "Wouldn't have pegged you as the cooking type."

"I dabble." Finn admitted. He felt heat rising to his face.

"Honesty. Can't fault you for that." she said with a warm smile. "Call me back if you need anything."

"Thank you ever so much." Johann nodded to her as she walked away. "Lovely girl. Reminds me of another girl years ago. Name was Mari, I think. I was in my ship just minding my own business when out she comes from the compartment below! Bedraggled little thing, said she was an orphan and running away from her horrible aunt. I sailed all over the archipelago before I found her a family right here on this island. Surely you remember."

"Oh yes. She just got engaged, I think." Kara said before turning to Finn. "So how is Cale doing? No one here has heard from him since he moved to Berk. We all miss his parents though. They were wonderful people."

"He's... adjusted." Finn shrugged. "Not much to say."

"Oh... okay." Kara turned to her food, leaving Finn to his thoughts.

Was this really where he wanted to stay? How long would he live here? He tried to imagine himself with his own place here, maybe a wife and kids. The thought gave him a headache. He couldn't imagine living somewhere so... small.

He finished his stew and tuned out Johann's stories until someone, he didn't know who, asked Kara for some assistance. Kara bid him and Johann goodbye for the time being and instructed Johann to take the Haddock boy to her residence when they were done.

"Well, Master Finn, it seems it is up to me to transport you to your lodgings." Johann said cheerfully, placing a few coins on the table. He held up a hand when Finn got out his satchel. "Ah ah, this is on me. Penance for not keeping a better eye on you all those years ago."

Finn felt a pang. He had never blamed Johann for his misfortune but he hated it being brought up. He had run away from the trader and gotten himself in that mess.

"If you will excuse me, Master Finn, I see one of my clients at the other table. I won't take long but I must ask him a few questions before we go." Johann announced before bustling over to a large man sitting across the tavern, leaving Finn completely alone in the midst of strangers.

"Fearless Finn Haddock."

Finn jumped and spun around to face Raine, who was eyeing him almost suspiciously.

"Umm..."

"That's your name, isn't it?" Raine brushed her hands off on her apron before extending one for him to shake. "Everyone knows the Hooligan heir is a big guy with freckles and lots of red hair."

"That's me." Finn grumbled. "Though I go by Finn, no need to tag on the fearless label."

"Wasn't planning on it." Raine rested her hands on her hips. "So what brings you here?"

"It's a long story." Finn said dismissively.

"Lucky for you, my shift is over and I've got good ears." Raine gestured to the table. "You look depressed. I want to help, if I can."

"Why are you being so nice?" Finn asked suspiciously.

"I feel like you need someone to talk to, even if it's just a stranger. I mean, who am I going to tell? I'm about as impartial as you can get." Raine sat down across the table from him and clasped her fingers in front of her pretty face.

Ordinarily, Finn would have brushed her off, no matter how attractive she might be. He certainly wasn't the type to pour his heart out to a stranger. But this girl had a kind face. She truly seemed to care. Finn slowly sat down and put his head down, staring at his hands.

"So... why are you really here, Finn?" Raine asked in a soothing tone.

Finn couldn't believe he was doing this. It was crazy, talking to a perfect stranger about this, but he felt like something was pent up. He didn't know what to do next. And perhaps this Raine person could offer some advice or point out something he had missed. So, before he was truly aware of what he was doing, he opened his mouth and poured out his secrets.

Ohh guys... I hope you liked that chapter. I have some pretty bad news though, in terms of personal stuff, so you can skip it if you like but it does relate to the series.

I recently had a conversation with someone familiar with this series. Their words were true and convicting for the most part (although their tone was a bit rude) but they went a bit farther than they should have, I realize now. I don't pretend to know everything and sometimes, people must listen to harsh truths. However, there is a significant difference between opinion and fact. The facts this person said to me were true, although uncomfortable. They should have stopped there. But they didn't. They kept going on into their opinions. And those opinions did far more harm than good.

Folks, this person claimed that no one cared about this series or my own loved ones. Though they attempted to backtrack and explain what they meant, I felt as if something had been taken from me. Something I needed to keep writing, something precious that I had deep down.

They stole my pride in my work.

Since that conversation, I've had a deep sense of guilt every time I sat down to write. A sense of dread instead of the joy I used to feel in sharing this with you. I made a decision I refuse to go back on, which is to finish this series, but it may be a long time before I feel like writing isn't a waste of time or something no one cares about. Those words haunt me and have cut me deeply. I was in a dark place after that, so dark that I couldn't write for a few days. Even now, I feel dreadful about it. I feel like all the happiness this used to bring was stolen from me. I know in my head that you all appreciate this series and have learned from it. But my heart feels differently. I feel like I have been wasting my time, not making a difference at all in this world that is so clearly outside of reality.

If this hasn't been in vain, if you are reading this because you've learned something or feel something significant, I'm sincerely glad. Part of the reason I write is to make you happy and make a difference. That's my mission. That's what I want to do more than anything. This isn't about me anymore. This is about you, it has been for a very long time. Through you all, I get the best ideas and I learn whether or not something works. Your reviews give me great joy because it means you took the time to not only read but respond to what you read. To know that something I poured blood, sweat, and tears into evokes an emotional reaction or a new thought makes it worth it. But now my very faith in that has been compromised. I don't want to keep writing if I'm not making that difference.

You may think it's silly for me to react so strongly to words clearly said in anger but words affect me more than anything else. A harsh word, even said for my benefit, will cut me down. An encouraging word keeps me going. I won't say what those words were that had such an impact on me but I assure you that it wasn't a quick comment. It was a half hour long punch in the gut that ended up damaging me more than before. Except I'm not going to make it look like I was damaged. I'm going to face that person with a smile, forcing myself to believe that they are dead wrong about it. I can only hope that they truly are.

Thanks so much for reading and I can't wait to read the reviews.

~KateMarie999