News update, I want a boyfriend
E.D

Ruby whistled the classic disney dwarf working song from the movie version as she served the dwarves some coffee. Most of them smiled except Leroy who was per usual sporting a hard ass hangover migraine and glared murderously at the waitress making this one chuckle. There was a bell jingling and a cold breeze and Elsa came rushing after her usual opening. She panted as she run to the brunette and as the bar was occupied she pushed sleepy off her stool and sat on it.
"Sorry!"
She said to the now sleeping dwarf on the floor. Anna came after Elsa and step aside the dwarf.
Ruby let a small laugh with wide eyes as the two twins caught there breath. Anna obviously started to babble before she even could catch a breath.
"We-... Happens - ice... Pphhhssheheewwwww and baaaoowm Regina, 360 no scope head shot"
Elsa panting lifted her hand for a high five that Anna gave and Ruby snorted.
"Jeez twins from Gayrandelle take a breather"
Elsa and Anna glared but followed the advice. The dwarves just stared at them before paying and leaving for the wall, finally giving Anna a chance to sit down.
Elsa took a deep breath and spoke finally to Ruby.
"I think Emma is Regina's true love"
Ruby eyes blew opened.
"Yeah, and I won the lottery"
Elsa huffed.
"I'm serious Ruby!"
"No, yeah me too, but Granny kept the money since the last party we broke loads of shit so, I don't mind it's StoryBrooke lottery, I mean it's like 30 bucks, which yeah it's nice, but still"
Explained while cleaning the bar uninterested. Anna gasped and clapped.
"That's so exciting Ruby! Congratulations! Not In your grandmother taking the money, I mean it sucks that your grandmother gets to keep it, but also we broke a lot a of stuff so it's the correct thing she keeps it-"
"Aaaanyway, you mean you already knew this? Congrats by the way"
Ruby stopped cleaning and looked at her friend.
"I don't think it was, Elsa"
"Ruby!
It was true loves kiss I'm telling you! That the only way you can cure someone who is being thawed"
Elsa practically yelled with Anna nodding in agreement.
"Then how come there wasn't any fireworks or light spectacle?"
Ruby countered.
"Maybe because they don't know it yet or won't admit it or they don't want people to know they fucked you know?"
Anna said hurriedly in a harsh whisper.
"How nice of the true love kiss to be so subtle for them"
Ruby huffed sarcastically rolling her eyes.
"Look Ruby, she was being frozen the only thing that helps is true loves kiss! Regina proved it since she couldn't free Marian, my Aunt had to do it"
Ruby pondered over it for a minute. The ice machine was right. It was the only way.
"So The Savior and The Evil Queen, Psh those are more cliche than The Beauty and The Beast, stupid asshole Emma"
Ruby grumbled as she cleaned the bar more roughly. The twins looked at each other worriedly.
"So... What do we do? Aren't we going to like join them?"
Anna asked slightly confused and Ruby barked a laugh.
"Oh girls, with those two is better to leave them alone but we can give them a little push"
Ruby said mischievously making Elsa and Anna lean closer. Ruby waggled her eyes and whispered her plans to the twins.

Emma entered the dinner adjusting her black leather jacket and greet the people inside the dinner. Ruby grinned and set the usual hot chocolate topped with cinnamon and an apple turn over. Emma sighed as she sat on her stool and groaned to her friend.
"Oh Ruby I'm so tired, I need a new deputy, I swear mom is making the department work extra hard to look for rumple AND THE DEPARTMENT IT'S ONLY ONE PERSON RUBY, ME! she says that his disappearance is part of a master plan or something but I don't know, since Hook left him, I guess Brain went looking for a new Pinky or something"
Emma complained resting on the counter. Ruby smiled at her friend.
"Hey, if I'll see someone with potential, I'll tell them to contact you okay?"
Emma lifted her head and grinned up. Emma felt so blessed to have friends like Ruby that would always support her and not fuck her up.
"So did you talk to Regina?"
And then there they went fucking her up.
Emma sigh her face gloomy again.
"Regina is like a Rubix cube, which by the way I could never solve one of those fuckers, I have one on my bed stand... Unsolved... Laughing at me every time I see it...with all it's colors, unorganized"
Ruby stared as her friend started to glare distantly at a memory. Worried that Emma might stay on that permanent glare Ruby snapped her fingers in front of Emma effectively bringing Swan back to earth. Emma shook her head and smiled at Ruby.
"well I'm off to go rumple hunting, see ya later alligator"
Ruby snorted as Emma lifted from the stool.
"God that's old and terrible"
Emma glared as she threw a
"Oh shut up or I'll sue you to da police!"
At Ruby over her shoulder before stalking off the diner.
"You are the police idiot!"
Ruby yelled after her and Emma gave her the finger. When the blonde was out of sight Ruby alerted her girlfriend that her part in the plan was done.

Belle read the message on her phone and sighed. Henry appeared from the kitchen cradling a bowl of cereal sporting a bed head and swimming trunks with a nirvana band shirt. The boy smiled at her while munching his cereal before he sleepily moved to the den. Belle followed him and stared at him as he sat down and watched tv. Belle cleared her throat.
"Henry, your mother is still sleeping?"
The boy turned to stare at her with narrowed eyes groggily. He had opened the door for her and then he was really hungry so he had to eat. Henry eyes belle and shrugged.
"I don't know, you should check her room, she usually sleeps late"
And so Belle went up the stairs and into the queen's lair. She snorted at her poetic mind as she opened the door and found Regina sprawled on her queen sized bed, sleeping in a tank top and yoga pants entangled in her velvet sheets and snoring lightly. Belle walked to the window and opened the blinds hoping to get a reaction from Regina. Which she got. As the sun rays hit the slumbering body, a swift flick of a hand happened and the blinds went right down again.
"I suggest you to leave unless you want me to thrust a pogo stick up your ass dear"
Belle walked were the brown eyes could see her and gave her a lopsided smile that was so adorable that Regina almost, almost gave a fuck. Almost.
"Mrs Lucas leave. Now"
Belle sat beside the beast and petted Regina on the head. Her heart had swelled at the words.
"Aw you called me Mrs Lucas! Regina!"
Regina lifted her head to face Belle and gave her a snarl before she produced a pogo stick.
"Leave or I'm standing and-"
Belle quickly slipped her arms under Regina and picked her up. Sheets included but leaving the pogo stick solitaire on the ground.
"How strong are you for a pregnant woman?!"
Regina yelped and waved her arms making Belle squeeze her harder on her stomach. Regina gasped for air her arms going limb from extortion of energy.
"Ms-belle...how...fucking...god"
Belle laughed and stomped to Regina's bathroom. Each stomped made Regina gasp and yelp.
Belle dropped her in her bath tub and opened the tap with cold water.
"BELLE DONT Y-FUCK THATS COLD"
Regina gaped and glared and the cutely grinning brunette who was happy with her assignment. Suddenly the water started to sizzle and evaporate upon contact on Regina's olive skin. Regina nostrils flared and her eyes turn purple but instead of intimidating belle it made her laugh and snap a picture with her phone.
"Oh Regina you look like a wet cat"
"I'm going to burn you"
Belle winked and popped her ass and bit her index finger.
"Burn baby burn! Disco inferno! And by the way I'm on my fourth month, bloody hell I'm not an invalid"
Regina rolled her eyes and took off her wet pijamas. Belle winked at her and left the bathroom, from the door she called.
"Regina I found you a job.. Opportunity"
"interview and Oh really?"
Belle smirked and threw a glance to the bathroom.
"Yup and I think you are going to like it"

And so Belle drove Regina to the sherif station. Regina gripped the seat of the hippie Volkswagen van and stared petrified at Belle.
"Are you fucking kidding me French?"
Belle shook her head at the woman she considered one of her closet friends and got out of her rent van.
Regina grumpily got out of the van like a kid who just got denied of candy. Belle grabbed her hand and dragged her into the station. As they entered, Belle mailed Regina's picture to her friends but added a special message at the bottom of the picture in the mail for a particular friend, it said 'Snow Gina is in the station now, expect soon'.
Belle pushed Regina forward as they entered the sheriff office where the found the one and only, sexy, Sherif Swan with her tongue poking out slightly as she wrote down paper work. Regina squirmed on place a tad uncomfortable as she became more aroused by Emma while Belle grinned and clapped her hands getting everyone's attention. Emma smiled and put her pen down.
"Hey, Hi, what can I help you with?"
Before Belle could speak Emma blurted.
"Wait is it Henry? No Rumple? No wait rumple appeared and took Henry! Oh my god another dragon or witch or princess let's go!"
Quickly Emma jumped off her chair and got her black leather jacket. Belle waved her arms and stopped the blonde.
"No, no, no, no! We came for the deputy opening"
Emma relaxed with a small 'oh' and she draped her jacket back on the back of her chair.
"Okay, who will be my lucky new deputy?"
Belle smiled and pushed Regina forward and Regina stood straighter but did not dare to look at the blonde in the eye.
Emma stared at both and her grin slowly grew before she fell into a full energy laugh that had her clutch her stomach and throw her head back.
While she cleaned her tears she saw that no one else was laughing and that they where very serious.
"Wait, really? ...okay"
Emma sobered and said and Regina arched a brow.
"Okay?"
The brunette questioned and Emma nodded.
"Yeah I need the extra help and you got magic, and you were looking for a job so, welcome deputy Mills"
Emma extended her hand to Regina and this one took it with a please smile. Emma hooked the badge to Regina's slacks.
StoryBrooke had a new sexy deputy in town.

Mean while

David sat on his wheel chair reading his captain America comic on the side of the room while sipping his grape juice excitedly. Snow sat on her mayoral chair and stroke baby Neal Godfather style as it laid on her arm and smiled mischievously. Her intercom beeped and Elsa's voice came through.
"Mayor Snow there's a new deputy in the station"
Snow smiled and pressed the button.
"Oh Elsa I know, and now The firemen aren't the only department filled with sexy people"
She laughed maliciously and David gaped a little frighten before getting offended.
"HEY!"
Snow gave him a sweet smile.
"You are the sexiest honey, Elsa call the Sherif to come in with her Deputy"

A.N
Don't hate me
I love you
Deputy Regina?!
Ohmmmmyyy
Who would call the police more often
*lifts hand*

And thinks that Wheelchair Charming is adorable? I picture him like a super excited little kid!