Chapter 14
Three weeks after I had called Plutarch to let him know we were going to come to the celebration, Peeta and I stood outside of our house, freezing our asses off as we packed a strange bullet-shaped contraption attached to the car Plutarch had sent for us to drive on our journey to the Capitol. He told us it was road-worthy, but I joked with Peeta that it looked more worthy of a can opener than a 4 day drive. That was how long the remote guidance system assured us (in an upbeat Capitol accent) the trip would be when we'd set it up the night before.
Gale's friend Thom had given us both rudimentary driving lessons in the weeks leading up to the trip and we both felt secure enough in our abilities to make it without much trouble. Haymitch had offered to go with us in the car, but really he was just worried about Peeta having an episode while we were on the road and there was no one there to protect me.
We didn't necessarily blow off his concerns, but Peeta told him it was too cold to have him sleep in the car while we took the bed in the trailer and he sure as Hell wasn't going to let Haymitch curl up in between the two of us at night. He didn't like it, but he agreed and was sitting on his porch watching us pack up the morning we left. He would be taking the train to the Capitol celebration but it wasn't set to roll into town for 2 more days.
Peeta turned away from the trailer after placing the last of our luggage and food we'd need for meals on the road inside. He walked up beside me where I stood watching Haymitch pouting on his porch, making sure he was looking anywhere but at the two of us.
"Aw man," Peeta laughed wrapping his arms around me over my heavy winter coat and pressing his lips to my ear. "He looks like a sad little puppy we're abandoning on a doorstep." He said shaking his head. "Come on, let's go say good-bye and get on the road." He said and released me so that we could both walk over to Haymitch's.
I climbed up the front of his porch to hang over the railing and Haymitch startled when I suddenly appeared in front of him. "Miss me yet?" I said with an animated grin and Haymitch rolled his eyes as Peeta climbed up beside me, hanging his top half over the rail like a child too.
"Can't very well miss you when you're still here, trampling over my flower garden like the poor-mannered brats I know you to be." He quipped and Peeta and I cut our eyes at one another at the same time and laughed.
"It's cute how he hides his affection for us with that general grumpiness." Peeta whispered to me and Haymitch tossed a frosty chair cushion at him which he deflected with a laugh.
"You know talking about me like I'm not sitting right here in front of you doesn't, in fact, help your case any." He grumbled as we hopped over the railing. We both plopped down on the bench he was sitting on, sandwiching Haymitch between us.
Haymitch harrumphed and folded his arms to make sure he wasn't touching either of us as we leaned into him. Childish, but affective in offending us just the right amount.
"Hey! Don't be such a grump! You're not going to see us for almost a week." I said reaching across my body to pat him hard on the chest. He pushed my hand away and crossed his arms.
"Now stop all this silly nonsense and listen to me." Haymitch sat up straighter and nudged each of us to sit up next to him so that he could glance back and forth between our faces. "You be careful driving that thing." He said nodding towards the car and trailer in the road. "Vehicles are nothing to play around with, and when you get tired, you stop and you sleep. Don't go trying to rush out there and end up wrecking somewhere along the way." He lectured.
"Yes, sir." We both said with a grin and Haymitch rolled his eyes. Peeta and I smiled at each other again. Despite the fact that we were going to be on our way to the Capitol, there was something exciting about taking such a long trip. Just the two of us together on the road, seeing the sights of the various districts we'd be driving through.
"Alright, well if you think of it, give me a call when you get there. Let me know how the drive was." He was trying for gruff, but I could hear underneath that he really did want to know that we were there safely.
"Sure, as soon as we get there you'll be our first call." I said with a chuckle and turned to look at him. I was so surprised by the sad look in his eyes that before I could stop myself, I leaned over and wrapped my arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly. "See you in a few days." I whispered and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before I stood and hopped back over the railing, ambling over to wait by the car for Peeta. I watched as he and Haymitch both stood and embraced quickly. I smiled sadly as I watched Haymitch reach up and pat the back of Peeta's head before they parted.
He followed behind a moment later and climbed in the driver's side to take the first shift as we'd agreed upon. "You ready?" he asked reaching over to hold my hand when I climbed in on the passenger's side. I suddenly realized, looking over at Peeta, that as young as we were, I had already had more important life experiences than I could count on two hands with this boy.
I leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his lips which he not only returned, but deepened. "Definitely." I whispered when we pulled away. I smiled into his eyes and turned my head to look out my window when I saw Peeta's eyes slide over to Haymitch's porch again. He was still sitting on the bench, wrapped up and watching us but pretending he wasn't. We both threw him a wave which he returned after a few moments along with a soft smile. When we smiled back he waved again but in a shooing motion this time and Peeta chuckled and turned around in his seat to start the car.
I watched him, making sure I remembered how to start the ignition and put the car in gear to drive. Peeta seemed to have the hang of it as he pushed down on the gas and we were off.
"Good thing driving a car is a right-footed activity." He joked when we were about 5 miles down the road. I smiled and turned in my seat to face him a little better. I watched Peeta, sitting comfortably in the drivers seat, both hands on the wheel and his eyes on the road ahead. It sometimes annoyed me how comfortable he was able to find himself in almost any situation when I saw myself as awkward at best during even the most mundane of activities.
"Did you ever drive a car before our lessons?" I asked and Peeta shook his head and continued to watch the road ahead of us.
"My brother's and my dad drove the supply truck to the train and back and used it for deliveries sometimes." He said softly and I saw a sad smile stretch across his face. "My brothers used to fight over who got to drive it. They'd harass me relentlessly about not being able to drive yet but to be honest, I didn't really care." He laughed and glanced over at me. "I was happy enough to sit in the back room and decorate cookies and cakes all day. I'm not real competitive if you hadn't noticed." He grinned playfully and I laughed thinking of his trying to die to let me go home in the first Games and then Finnick's remarks in the second about Peeta being the only one in the Quell who was a victor by chance.
"As a matter of fact, I did notice that." I teased and leaned back in my seat trying to get comfortable. "Did you get along with them? Your brothers I mean." I asked and Peeta's face fell a little. "I'm…I'm sorry, Peeta. We don't have to talk about.." I started to apologize when he shook his head.
"No, no it's okay." He said reaching over for my hand with one of his, the other he kept on the wheel to steer with. "I should talk about them." He said quietly and took a deep breath. "I…don't know why I haven't before now." He whispered with a hint of shame in his voice. "I guess it was just too hard before and with the things they put in my head during my hijacking about you…and trying to make me think you were responsible for what happened to my family…" he trailed off with a shrug and then cleared his throat and squeezed my hand once before returning both of his to the wheel.
"Part of being in a relationship is sharing feelings, and memories, and stories about our families." He said with a small smile. "Maybe that's what we can do while we're driving." He offered. "I know about your school life because well…you didn't really seem to have much of one." He chuckled and I smirked at him. "And I'm starting to know about your life in the woods hunting with Gale." He tried to say it casually, but there was a little bit of an underlying edge to his voice that I realized might always be there when Gale's name came up. "I don't know much about your family except for what I experienced myself hanging out at your house before the Quell. I know the story about Prim's goat and I know that when your father sang, even the birds stopped to listen which is a talent he passed on…" he said gesturing to me with a loving smile. "But tell me more, I want to know as much as I can about what you came from, Katniss." He said sounding genuinely interested. "I know as a Town and a Seam kid growing up, we had particular ideas about how the other lived, but I want to know what it was really like for you. I want to know everything about you. Especially the things I've forgotten or think I've forgotten because of…because of what they did to me."
He said it so passionately and with that genuine interest that so defined him (and still does), that everything just began to flow.
I told him about the first time my father took me into the woods as a child. How afraid I'd been at first, knowing from school and our frightened neighbors that going into the forest was strictly forbidden. I explained to him how I'd begged my father not to take me with him at first, insisting that some horrible wild animal would attack us if we did and how my father explained to me that there wasn't anything in the forest the Capitol wanted to protect us from. That it was what they wanted to keep inside the fence they feared the most; us. I didn't understand at first because I was such a young child.
As I spent more and more time in the woods with my father, learning to use a bow, gathering plants and herbs my mother needed for healing the sick, helping him to feed our family without depending on the government for everything, it started to make sense to me. Without that complete dependence on the Capitol for everything, came a sense of freedom and self-worth and with that freedom and self-worth came a new and unfamiliar word; rights. Rights that should have belonged to every citizen but did not because of the power the Capitol held over every aspect of our lives.
Peeta listened as he drove, occasionally commenting on ways the Capitol controlled the merchant class as well. Taxing their businesses, their supplies, the ingredients that came in on the trains from other districts. It helped to give me some insight of my own into the difficulties the people in town faced.
I already had my opinion of those in the town changed in the first games when Peeta told me that most of what they ate was stale leftovers from the bakery. Before the Games, I had always assumed that the merchants lived a superior life to those of us in the Seam, but hearing that from Peeta was both surprising and enlightening.
Nobody's life was easy under the reign of the Capitol.
The conversation was awkward and stunted at first, but by the time we had burned through the car snacks for the day and needed to stop and sleep for the night, we had learned more about each other in that seven hours driving than we had in our whole lives growing up in 12 together.
"I'm going to go check how well that little stove in the trailer works and see if I can make us something hot for dinner." I said pulling my coat around my body better as I climbed out of the car.
Peeta nodded and climbed out too, saying that he was going to stretch his legs.
"Hey, Peeta?" I said and he turned from where he was walking toward the tree line around the rest area we'd stopped at. "Thanks…I mean, for what we talked about today." I said shyly and shrugged my shoulders. "It was nice to hear where you came from too and…I dunno, I guess I just feel…closer to you now." I said quietly and hoped he could hear me over the icy wind that had begun to pick up.
Peeta stood there motionless for a moment and then that goofy smile I had started to associate with his inner five-year-old self appeared. He strode back over to me, stopping when he was only inches from my face.
"I know, I feel it too." He said quietly and lifted his eyes to mine before he leaned in and kissed me slowly. I reached up and gripped the sides of his jacket at his ribs and held him close. When we pulled away, he held the car keys up between us.
I took the keys from him with a smile and walked around to the back of the car where the trailer was hitched as Peeta headed off into the woods to look around.
The trailer still looked like a big silver bullet to me, but I guessed it would do for keeping us out of the elements while we slept.
The sun was just beginning to set as I opened the door and stepped inside, flipping on a light hanging in the middle of the room. It was a small space and not an inch of it was wasted. A small double bed took up most of the back of the trailer with a small bathroom to one side of the foot of the bed and a little bench seat and a table for eating beside it. On the other side of the bed was a small kitchen space with stove top, oven, small refrigerator, and a sink. There were plenty of windows which I knew Peeta was happy about. One skylight over the bed and then two double windows with blinds over both the kitchen space and the seating area.
I walked over to the bed and opened the drawers underneath which Peeta and I had stocked with clothes for the trip, and pulled out a pair of Peeta's sweats and a flannel shirt of my own that buttoned up the front. Something told me that even with the heat on, this might be a chilly night spent in the trailer. I turned on the heat and set the stove to warm up before I changed quickly into my nightclothes and used the bathroom.
I was just putting a small roast into the oven to reheat when Peeta stomped in the door, huffing and puffing and rubbing his hands together from the cold.
"Fuck, it's freezing out!" he laughed and pulled the door shut tight, locking it behind him.
"That tends to happen in the winter genius." I teased as I started some water boiling on the stovetop for vegetables. Before I could even turn my head to catch his response, Peeta was right beside me, grabbing me and sticking his ice cold hands up the back of my flannel shirt.
I screamed and grabbed onto his wrists, trying to push them away with very little luck as he laughed and pushed me towards the back of the trailer. We toppled onto the bed in a screeching, squirming heap.
"Alright! Alright! Stop it!" I screeched through peals of laughter and Peeta pulled his hands back and propped himself up on his elbows from where he lay on top of me. It was a little better with his ice block hands not touching my skin directly, but his whole body stretched out on me was still pretty chilly.
"Get off! You're whole body feels like walking into the big freezer in the bakery!" I begged and Peeta leaned down and kissed me with frosty lips, making sure to dig his chilly red nose into my cheek. I swatted his shoulder and he finally relented, rolling off of me onto his back.
"No more making fun of me then." He smirked and I put my hand over my heart and turned my head to look at him.
"Promise." I said seriously and then smiled sweetly. "Well, at least until tomorrow." I said with a grin and he flipped over, his hands grabbing at my hips again as I kicked and tried to roll away from him. " No stop! I'll behave!" I squealed and Peeta gave me a look of warning before rolling onto his back again. "Come on! Get changed, dinner will be ready soon." I said pulling away from him and climbing off of the bed.
I was almost finished with the vegetables before he finally climbed from the bed and started pulling off his clothes. "So you really liked talking like that today?" I asked curiously and Peeta nodded vehemently as he threw his clothing from the day in a pile and pulled on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt for bed.
He moved over to lean against the small counter beside me and looked down at the floor in that nervous way he sometimes did when he thought of 'unattainable Katniss Everdeen from the Seam, who hunted in the forbidden woods and traded at the Hob with adults'. "I always thought you were amazing before I'd ever spoken to you, so I knew you had to have come from an amazing family with an amazing guy for a dad." He said with a nervous laugh. "It was nice to have my suspicions confirmed today."
I was past being embarrassed by the way Peeta had idolized me since he was a child. It was as much a part of him as his eye color. If I was honest, by this point in our developing adult relationship, it was kind of a turn on that he saw me as such a strong, independent woman and found that attractive rather than intimidating.
I nodded with a little smile and turned off the stove before moving over to loop my arms around his waist. "Just like it was nice for me to have always known that the popular baker's son who was always surrounded by a crowd of friends in school, was the type of kindhearted boy who would take a beating to feed a poor, starving little girl from slums of his district." I said reaching up to kiss him deeply.
We held each other, necking against the counter for a few minutes until the timer on the oven broke the spell of that moment. "Mmm…" Peeta groaned as he pulled back and cast an angry glare at the offending appliance. "…just when things were getting interesting." He teased and tugged me a little closer to him, just close enough to feel how interesting things were getting to him.
I felt a little thrill run up my spine, never tiring of the effect I seemed to have on him. "They can still be interesting after we eat." I whispered and leaned up to kiss him one more time before going to take the roast out.
Peeta set the table and was grabbing some bottled water for each of us from the fridge when he made a noise of surprise and pulled back his hand with a large bottle grasped in it. "Oh boy." He chuckled and turned to set the bottle on the table so that I could see it.
"What? What is it?" I asked walking over with the roast and placing it in the middle of the table. Peeta just pointed at a note I hadn't noticed was attached to the bottle and I turned it toward me to read.
Relax and enjoy, but don't you dare drive a foot after drinking this.-H
I grinned and lifted the bottle of fine wine to look it over. "He does love us after all." I said with a dreamy sigh and handed it to Peeta. "Will you do the honors?" I asked and he chuckled as he took it in both hands and aimed the top of the bottle toward the door. It only took a moment for him to get under it and the cork shot across the little room with a pop!
"Very nice, Haymitch." Peeta chuckled and grabbed two wine glasses from the small cupboard. He placed them on the table and poured us each half a glass and set the bottle down in the middle of the table for later.
We both sat down together on the bench seat attached to the wall and filled our plates. I hadn't realized how hungry I was until the food was right there in front of me. We chatted amicably about the drive and discussed what the plan for the next day was, sipping wine and scooting closer together. By the time we finished eating and our bellies were full, Peeta had turned to lean against the wall beside the bench with his feet out straight across the seat and me sitting between his legs as I lay back against his chest. We each still had our glasses of wine and were sipping them as we continued to talk.
Haymitch had chosen a very nice bottle of wine, indeed.
I was reminiscing about the time Haymitch interrupted us the first day we had rediscovered our sexual attraction to each other when Peeta laughed and kissed my neck.
"I was soooo worried you were going to turn over and punch me." He whispered, thinking about that afternoon when we had woken up snuggled tightly together and began something that Haymitch's bellowing for a meal had quickly ended. "I still wasn't completely sure that you ever really even…felt that way about me." He admitted quietly and I turned my head to look up into his face.
"I'm sorry you ever doubted that…" I started and then turned over so that I was straddling his lap and smiled softly. "You know, I as much as told everyone at the dinner table in the first games that first night after training and you were totally oblivious." I said proudly and Peeta's eyes narrowed as he tried to think of that night.
"What? When?" He asked wrapping his arms loosely around me and stroking his hands up and down my back.
I grinned, proud of myself for having been able to share this memory with him. "Don't you remember? When you told Haymitch about the squirrels I brought to your dad and how I shot them all through the eye…" I said leadingly.
"I'm pretty sure that only shows that I have always been attracted to…and kind of creepily watching…you." He teased and I chuckled and shook my head.
"No, no…I'm talking about when I told Haymitch about your strengths." I said trying to gently stir up the memory for him. It hurt my heart to watch him trying to remember. I could almost see him sorting through all of the horrors in his mind, searching for the memory of that night at the dinner table. "I told him that you were strong and that I had seen you throw a hundred pound bag of flower right over your head…" I whispered, leaning back from him a little and stroking my hands down those strong arms from his shoulders to his wrists.
"And I told him how you placed second in wrestling in the school…" I said bringing one of his hands up to my face and kissing the inner part of the wrist gently. I smiled when Peeta moaned softly and shifted his hips. "I always thought you looked kinda cute in that wrestling leotard." I chuckled and kissed my way up the inner part of his forearm until I hit the bend in his elbow where I stuck my tongue out to gently touch the skin there.
I heard the breath catch in Peeta's throat and he instinctively dropped his hands to my hips, pulling me flush against him. Clearly his interest from before dinner hadn't waned any even after a full belly and half a bottle of wine.
"I wish I still had that, I'd parade around the house in it whenever I was feeling frisky." He laughed and brought his lips down onto my neck, kissing slowly up to my ear.
I moaned softly and slid my hands up into his hair, turning his head so that our lips met. "So that'd be…every day then?" I laughed back and Peeta laughed harder and reached for the buttons on my flannel shirt, gently slipping them free of the fabric as he moved his hands from my throat to my navel.
"Pretty much." He whispered slipping his hands inside the open shirt. He held onto my bare waist and kissed his way down my neck to my chest. "Mmm…no bra…good thinking." He murmured and wrapped his lips around one nipple, pulling it into his mouth and sending a hot stab of need straight to my center.
"Bed." I gasped, fisting my hands in his hair. Peeta grunted in agreement and released me long enough to let me hop off of his lap and help him up from the cramped bench seat. He grabbed me in the middle of the tiny room and we kissed passionately for a few moments before starting to shuffle back towards the bed.
"Mmm…Peeta," I said between kisses as he brought his hands up between us to massage my breasts. "I love you…and I'd sincerely love nothing more than to get naked with you right now…" I murmured between searing kisses. "But it is freezing outside and not a whole lot better in here…" I stopped when Peeta cut me off with a kiss and a whispered promise.
"I'll keep you plenty warm, Katniss. Don't worry about that." He said it with a shuddering, needy breath that would have had me letting him take me outside on the cold ground if he'd wanted to. I pulled back and looked into his intense blue gaze and nodded quickly before pulling him over to the bed with me.
We fell back onto the mattress with an 'oof' from each of us followed by peals of laughter as we crawled under the covers together and Peeta pulled them up over our heads.
"Hey." He grinned as he reached out and pushed the open flannel shirt off of my shoulders, leaving it on the bed behind me.
"Hey." I smiled back and reached behind him for the hem of his t-shirt, tugging it up and over his head and leaving it between us on the mattress. We were left wearing matching sweatpants as I had grabbed a pair of Peeta's and pulled them on for bed.
Peeta raised his eyebrows as he looked down between us in the dim light under the blankets. "They look way better on you." He said reaching out with one hand to trace the waist of the pants I was wearing with a finger tip from one hip to the other. "I used to imagine you wearing one of my t-shirts or a baggy pair of my sweats like this…" he blurted out suddenly and I pulled the covers off of our heads and raised my eyebrows.
"You did, did you?" I said with a sly smile sneaking to my face. "And when was this?" I asked propping my head up on one arm. I could tell he immediately regretted what he said because his cheeks pinked and he wouldn't look at me as he squirmed around and rolled onto his back, looking up through the skylight when his head popped out the top of the covers.
"I dunno…forget I said anything." He groaned and threw an arm over his face to hide his embarrassment. I leaned over and grabbed his arm, pulling it away and making him look at me.
"Hey! I'm not making fun of you, I'm just…curious I guess…do you mean like, before or after we really met in the Games?" I asked and Peeta sighed and closed his eyes.
"Both." He said and grimaced, covering his eyes again. "Please don't make me talk about this…it's insanely embarrassing." He groaned again and pulled the covers over his face. I rolled my eyes and pulled my own head back under the covers with him.
"No it's not! I think it's kinda…hot actually." I admitted and rubbed my thighs together when I felt the slickness of my arousal building between them. "Did you have those kinds of thoughts about me a lot?" I asked reaching out to trace the waist of his sweats in the same way he'd done to me.
"Of course I did, Katniss! I've been in love with you my whole life, who else would I think about like that?" He asked exasperated and I bit back a moan as I slid my hand a little lower to touch him through his pants. He was already hard but stiffened even more when I wrapped my hand around him.
"Did you touch yourself like this and pretend it was me?" I asked and leaned forward to kiss across his chest gently as I continued to stroke him, adding my other hand and slipping both down the front of his sweats to touch him. I didn't know what had me so emboldened that night. Peeta was usually the more talkative one in bed but there was something about knowing he'd imagined us together even as a young teen, trying to be quiet in his bedroom over the bakery, that I found to be a gigantic turn on.
"Uh huh." He grunted and I felt him start to thrust into my hands as his eyes dropped closed. "Ahh…Katniss." He hissed and I pushed his sweats down to his feet and tugged them off gently. I was running my fingers over the latch on his prosthetic when one of his hands reached down to still both of mine.
I couldn't see his face, I was too far under the covers, but I looked up anyway. "What? What's wrong?" I whispered and Peeta tugged on my hands, pulling me back up so that we were face to face.
"Nothing, I just want to leave it on for now." He whispered and leaned in to kiss me. "Could…can I try something?" he asked nervously and I reached out to stroke his cheek.
"Sure…I think…" I chuckled and waited patiently for him to continue.
Peeta took a deep breath and rested a hand on my hip as we lay on our sides facing one another. "It's just something I heard my brother's talking about one night when they thought I was asleep." He mumbled and if possible, his cheeks grew redder. "My oldest brother, Leven…he was talking about him and his girlfriend and how they…they had sex this one night and he was behind her…" My eyes widened at the implication and Peeta laughed and quickly shook his head. "Not…not like that." He assured me and I let out the breath I was holding. "Just…from behind. He said it works best if you're both up on your knees."
I could tell just by looking into his face that he was terrified of how I was going to respond to his request. We had plenty of sex in the many months leading up to that night, but always in relatively the same way. We had figured out some things along the way with both of us being each other's first experience, but when it came to the actual act itself, we had kept things relatively simple.
Peeta was chewing on his bottom lip nervously when I looked back up into his eyes. I smiled and wrapped a hand around the back of his neck, pulling his lips down to mine and kissing him deeply. "Love you." I said pressing a kiss against his temple and squirming over to lie on top of him.
"Love you too, Katniss. So much." He gasped running his hands up and down my bare back a few times as we kissed and rubbed against one another.
I dropped my legs down on either side of his hips and began to lightly tease him through the sweatpants I was still wearing and Peeta moved his kisses to my neck and across my collarbones. I pressed my face into the pillow beside Peeta's head and moaned when one of his hands slipped under the front of my sweats and the other continued to stroke up and down my spine methodically.
I couldn't stop myself from bucking into his hand when he slipped first two then three fingers into me. "Wow, you're so ready…" Peeta grunted against my shoulder and I pulled my face back from the pillow and smiled.
"Maybe because that idea you had is sounding pretty good to me, too." I admitted and bit my own bottom lip bashfully, looking down at him as I continued to push my hips into his hand.
I could barely tell in the dim light beneath the covers, but I saw Peeta's eyes widen a bit and his fingers paused inside of me briefly. He nodded and removed his hand from between us, sliding it around to my back with his other hand.
"Sh…sure…but let's work up to it okay? No pressure." He smiled softly and cupped both hands around my backside, squeezing roughly as he pushed his hips up into mine. I nodded and rolled over onto my back, tugging Peeta with me so that he was on top of me. His hands, which were still on my backside but now pinned between me and the mattress, gripped the fabric of the sweats and tugged them down to my knees. I used my feet to push them down the rest of the way and left them at the bottom of the bed.
With nothing between us now, Peeta kissed his way down my body again and I felt a heightened sense of anticipation when his head disappeared beneath the covers as he passed my waist and brought his lips down onto me directly. I gripped the mattress and moaned over and over as he worked me with his mouth. Knowing that it was to make me more comfortable and relaxed for what we were about to do made it even better.
"Unh…Peeta." I groaned and reached down to grip his hair with one hand, moving the covers just off of my face so that I could breathe. He continued to use his tongue, adding his fingers along with it and the dual sensations pushed me quickly to the edge. When I squeezed his left shoulder, which was usually the signal that I was close and wanted him to stop, Peeta ignored me and instead quickened the pace of his tongue and fingers which sent me screaming into my orgasm.
I was lying panting and sweating, my arms and legs sprawled out on the bed when Peeta slipped back up beside me and popped his head out of the covers with a wicked grin.
"That was for the 'genius' crack when I first walked in from outside." He chuckled, kissing me deeply so that I could taste myself on his lips.
Still gasping for air, I laughed lightly with him. "If that's what you call a punishment, I'll be sure to make jokes at your expense more often." I said holding his face still so that I could kiss him back leisurely.
Peeta smiled against my lips and shook his head slowly as if I would never be able to stop surprising him, so I decided not to disappoint and surprised him again.
I kissed him once on the nose and slowly turned over underneath him so that I was lying on my stomach and Peeta was stretched out on my back. I turned my head and he kissed me over my shoulder with a few short, quick kisses. Peeta's way of saying 'thank you'.
"You're welcome, baby." I whispered and he moved my loose hair over to one side of my neck, bringing his lips down on the other side as he slipped a knee between my thighs from behind and ground his hips into my backside. I welcomed his touch, raising my ass against him, inviting him to take over.
Without a second though, Peeta climbed up onto his knees (which gave me a clue as to why he'd wanted me to leave his prosthetic on) and hooked an arm under me at my belly, tugging me up onto my hands and knees. He kissed his way up my spine to my neck and kissed my ear before nibbling on the lobe sensually. I moaned and reached back with one hand to grip his side, letting him know that I liked what he was doing so far.
"Yes…like that." I gasped and the hand he had on my belly slid slowly up my torso to cup one breast, kneading it for a few moments before moving to the other and doing the same. I pushed my hips back into his harder and felt Peeta's straining erection against my backside.
"You ready?" Peeta grunted beside my ear. When I nodded enthusiastically, he moved the hand that had been massaging my breasts to my sternum and guided me up just onto my knees and sat back on his heels. The chill of the room hit me like a wall and Peeta grabbed the blankets we had tossed aside, pulling them out from where they were tucked into the bed so that they were loose and swaddled the two of us in them together. He tucked the covers tightly at our armpits to keep them around us like I did with a bath towel so that we were warm and also basically trapped with his front to my back.
"Sit up a little." He said putting both hands on my hips over the blankets and lifting me off of his thighs where I had landed when we sat back together. I felt him lining his hips up and his tip poking at my center. I spread my knees apart so that they were on either side of his bent legs, our calves touching, and slowly, a little at a time sank down onto him.
The feeling was definitely different compared to how we usually had sex. The angle allowed him to go deeper and every inch of him to rub against the most sensitive parts of my inner walls as he pushed in. My eyes rolled back in my head as I thought about how it would feel once he really started moving. 'Or when I really started moving' I thought as I suddenly realized I would have to do the majority of the work in this position.
"Just move how it feels good for you, Kat." He whispered, folding his arms lovingly over my belly on top of the blankets and resting his cheek between my shoulders. I nodded and reached back with both hands to hold onto his hips and slowly raised up onto my knees, feeling him rub against my walls in a completely different way. I hissed and froze for a moment which of course, made Peeta think that something had hurt or felt wrong.
"What? You okay?" He asked lifting his head from my back and tightening his arms around my middle. I nodded but didn't speak at first, just rose up a little more until all that was left of him inside me was the head.
"Yeah, yeah I'm okay, it just feels…different. REALLY good different." I amended quickly and Peeta laughed softly. "Oh good, cause it feels fan-fucking-tastic for me." He moaned and dropped his head back to between my shoulders.
"Peeta Mellark!" I said with mock scolding. "What would Effie say about your language around a lady?" I laughed and slowly sank back down onto him as he moved his hands to hold my hips and helped guide my movements.
"Probably the same thing she'd say to said lady about having sex in this position." He growled behind me and I felt his hands leave my hips as he leaned back on them to support my weight better. I started moving faster, raising and lowering myself onto him, part of me loving the control it gave me over both of our pleasure.
"Oooooo…Point, Mellark." I chuckled breathily and dug my fingers into his hips as he began to raise them up to meet mine every other thrust. "Oh Peeta, this feels amazing…I think I'm going to...yeah, definitely getting close again." I grunted and felt hot air billowing from the space between our bodies, trapped in by the blankets wrapped around us.
"I'm close too…" Peeta gasped and I felt him shift his legs underneath me. "Can…could we move forward a little, my leg is falling asleep." He said with a short laugh and I let go of his hips and put my hands down flat on the mattress in front of me. Peeta, being tucked into the same blanket with me, was pulled forward with me and almost fell on my back but caught himself with his hands against the mattress too.
"Ooops." I chuckled but it turned into a moan when he began to thrust into me with renewed enthusiasm.
It was at that point that all talking ceased as we both became completely caught up in the sensations tearing through our bodies. I pushed back against Peeta with a passion equal to his own and finally cried out, tumbling over the edge when Peeta slid one of his hands between my legs, rubbing me through the blankets. He followed right after and we both collapsed to the bed together, our bodies slippery with sweat.
Peeta was the first to move, slipping out of me and loosening the blankets around us so that he could slide off of my back.
"Ohhh…I still can't feel my leg." He said between gasps for air and pulled the large down comforter from the end of the bed up and over the two of us. "What's weird though is I think I can feel my missing leg again." He teased and I started laughing so hard that no noise came out of my mouth. Peeta joined in and rolled over, pulling me into his arms.
When we finally composed ourselves, I took his face between my hands and kissed his lips lightly. "Once again, Mr. Mellark, another of your ideas proves to be a hit." I said snuggling into his arms. "That position is definitely going into the rotation." I said peppering kisses across his throat.
Peeta reached up to play with my pearl necklace as he often did after making love and I rested one of my hands overtop of the one he had at my neck. "Glad to hear that." He whispered and brought my hand to his lips, kissing my knuckles in an adorable, gentlemanly way.
"Love you." He said with a hoarse voice that told me he was getting sleepy. I could understand; he had driven a long distance with very little experience doing so under his belt.
"Love you too, now get some sleep." I said resting my head in its usual spot over his heart. When Peeta didn't respond, I lifted my head slowly and looked up at him.
He was sound asleep.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The next thing I knew, I was back in the square in front of the President's mansion in the Capitol on the day of the final rebel assault. On the day I saw my little sister killed in an explosion while trying to help wounded children.
Thinking back, I should have known that it was a dream, but it felt for some reason like a premonition. It was like I had been magically transported back in time to right the wrong of that, the most horrible moment in my life. I quickly discovered that what was more horrifying than having lived that moment the first time around, was reliving it knowing what was to come and being able to do absolutely nothing to change it.
In the dream, I had just watched the second wave of parachutes being dropped into the square and was screaming at Prim, trying to get her attention, when I woke up screaming her name and thrashing in a tangle of sheets. I sat straight up with a huge gasp for air, my hair clinging to my sweaty neck and face.
I jumped when Peeta reached out to touch my arm in the dark, whispering soothing words to me. "Shhh…it's alright Katniss, you're with me…I'm with you." He said gently but I could feel he wasn't moving any closer to me, waiting to see if I'd want his comfort.
I answered that question pretty quickly when I threw myself into his arms sobbing. He wrapped me in his arms, stroking his hands over my back and arms, petting my hair lovingly. "Shhh…it's alright, I'm here. I have you." He said it over and over as I cried until my head felt like it was going to explode.
I felt Peeta move and the little nightlight beside the bed flicked on. "Hang on, let me get you something for your head." He could be so perceptive even after less than a year living with me.
He slipped out of bed naked and went into the little bathroom, returning a moment later with a glass of water and a small pill. I sat up, still trying to get my breathing under control, and took the pill and water from him with an appreciative smile.
"Thanks." I croaked out and chugged the whole glass of water as Peeta climbed back into bed beside me and sat waiting until I was ready to talk. As it turned out, on that particular night, I wasn't going to be ready to talk at all.
"No problem. You want to talk about it?" he asked gently and I immediately shook my head.
"No, no…thank you, but no, not tonight." I said whispering the last few words and looking down at the empty glass in my hands. Peeta accepted that without question. There was many a night that he awoke screaming at the ghosts that haunted him and not wanting to discuss them. We always asked but never pushed the other to share. Sometimes we could stand the pain long enough to let the other share the burden of our nightmares, most times we could not.
"Okay." Peeta said reaching over to touch my hand where it was clutching the covers to my chest. "Then can I at least hold you and stand guard over the rest of your night?" he whispered and I scooted over into his welcoming arms with a nod.
"Thank you." I said hugging him tightly and tucking my head under his chin.
"Sleep now, I'll catch the rest of my Z's during your turn driving tomorrow." He said kissing my forehead and I chanced a small but sad smile.
"Hey, I kept you entertained during your drive, I expect the same." I whispered as I snuggled into his arms, cursing the fact that I was shaking like a leaf. Peeta just pulled me close as the pill he gave me started to take effect.
"You'll…you'll stay with me?" I remember asking groggily as the medicine quickly pulled me under. This time, I did catch Peeta's whispered response and I like to think it helped me to make it through the rest of that night.
Always.
When I woke up the next morning, I was swaddled in the blankets and curled up on Peeta's side of the bed. I lifted my head and looked around, confused for a moment by the combination of Peeta's familiar smell all around me in an unfamiliar place.
"Peeta?" I called out hoarsely and only then did I notice the water in the bathroom was running.
"In here! I didn't want to wake you!" He called back and I couldn't help but chuckle when he stuck his soapy head out the door to look at me. "I'd have invited you in, but I barely fit in this stupid shower by myself." He said and I could feel him assessing my mood. "You sleep better after…" he didn't finish the sentence. He didn't need to.
"Uh, yeah, I did….thanks." I said meekly and tucked my hair behind my ears self-consciously. It should have been old hat by that point, waking up screaming in the middle of the night, but it still bothered me. It might have been that part of me still wished for a time when Peeta and I would be able to make it a week straight without one of us needing to be comforted like a child afraid of the monster in their closet.
It could have also been the crushing, sometimes panic-inducing knowledge that the monsters in mine and Peeta's closets were real.
"Good, I'll be done in here in a second." He said and pulled his head back into the tiny bathroom. I nodded and yawned, slipping out of bed and pulling one of the blankets around my shoulders. I went to the kitchen area and turned on the little coffee pot there before peeking out the blinds. It was bright and sunny out and I couldn't hear the wind like the previous night. It was looking to be a pretty nice day for driving.
I pulled the blanket around me more and slipped into the bathroom to relive my bladder. Peeta heard me come in and stuck his head out of the small shower curtain, raising his eyebrows when he found me sitting on the toilet.
"Want me to leave this on for you?" He asked reaching for a towel and averting his eyes. I laughed and rolled my eyes at him. And I was the pure one?
"What? I have the blanket around me, and I had to pee…" I grumbled sleepily as I stood and put the toilet seat down. Peeta shook his head and held onto the towel rack so that he could hop out of the shower. I noticed his prosthetic leaning against the sink as I tossed the blanket aside and climbed in the shower.
"Were you okay sleeping with that on last night?" I asked as I started rinsing off and Peeta dried off on the mat by the sink. I knew he didn't really like sleeping with it on and when he forgot, I usually remembered and took it off of him before I went to sleep. That night before however, I was in no shape to help after making love like we had. A hovercraft could have carpet bombed the trailer and I would have never been the wiser.
"Yeah, I pulled it off later when you went back to sleep after your dream." He said wrapping his towel around his waist and sitting down on the toilet seat to reattach his leg.
I was soaping up my hair and glanced over at him through the clear curtain. "Memory…not dream." I said shortly and Peeta just nodded.
"Take your time, I'll make us something for breakfast and repack the car cooler for the drive. You sure you're gonna be okay with driving today? Cause I could take another turn if you want, it's not problem." He asked standing and pulling the door open.
"Yeah, I'll be fine. Thanks though." I said trying to sound light. I could feel his eyes on me for another long few seconds before he left the bathroom and shut the door behind him.
When I exited the bathroom, Peeta was dressed and leaning against the counter talking on the phone the trailer had come equipped with. I walked over to my side of the bed and started getting dressed while I listened to the rest of his conversation. I knew right away who he was talking to.
"Yes, it's very nicely decorated…we appreciate that…uh huh, very soft bedsheets." He said and widened his eyes at me. I grinned as I started to remake the bed, enjoying watching Peeta flounder a little under the Effie Trinket inquisition.
"That's really nice of you, Effie…I'm sure Katniss will be thrilled to know you're going to be with us all through our visit." He said and I made a face similar to that of a child being told they could go out late with their friends as long as their older sibling accompanied them. I dropped my head back, looking up through the skylight over our bed and did a little angry dance in place, that Peeta seemed to find really entertaining.
"Oh, I'd love to give the phone over to her, but you know what? She's showering right now as luck would have it." He said with a smirk in my direction and I folded my hands together and mouthed a silent 'thank you'. He nodded and after a few more flattering parting words, hung up and turned to me.
"She just feels responsible is all, Katniss." Peeta laughed and moved over to help me finish making the bed. "She's…seen the error of her ways, or the error of the Capitol's ways I should say, and she wants to take care of us while we're there to make up for it."
Neither of us knew all what exactly had been done to Effie between the Quarter Quell and when we saw her again at the end of the war, but it had changed her view of the Capitol and the Hunger Games drastically. She had been almost reserved when we had seen her last.
"I know, it's just…it brings back a lot of feelings for me, doesn't it for you? Going into the Capitol, with Effie chaperoning…" I trailed off and Peeta nodded slowly. I could tell this was just as hard for him to accept, but as a person who had spent his whole life trying to see the best in others, Peeta wanted to believe that things had changed. That what Plutarch had been telling us over the phone for weeks was the truth.
He walked around and met me at the end of the bed, tugging me into his arms and kissing the top of my head. "It'll be alright, Kat…" he whispered. "Being in the Capitol again, seeing Effie, having all of that attention on us again…" he promised and I sighed and pulled back to look up at him.
"How can you be so sure though?" I asked looking into his eyes. Peeta smiled softly and cupped my cheek tenderly in one hand.
"Because I'll be there for you and you'll be there for me….because that's what you and I do; protect each other. Real or not real?" he said this last line in a whisper and I wrapped my arms around his torso, hugging him tight.
"Real, Peeta. Real." I murmured into his chest and kissed the spot over his heart gently.