"Every time I try to talk to you,

I get tongue-tied.

Turns out, everything I say to you,

Comes out wrong and never comes out right."

Why Don't You & I by Santana

XVII

It was December 27th and Seto was happier than he usually was during that particular time of year. The holidays had always been a bit daunting to Seto considering the implications that followed them… family, togetherness, warmth; things Seto didn't experience after his parents died. Though Seto tried his best to hold onto what few memories he had of happier holidays, it didn't change the fact that the holidays themselves weighed on his soul a little bit every year. That year things had gone well, surprisingly. He had enjoyed spending the holidays with his brother and caught a couple more hours of sleep than he usually did without school or work to attend to. Though school wasn't due for another week and Kaiba Corp. didn't open again until the following day, there was still work to be done and Seto couldn't think of a better day to come into the office then when all the employees were still on vacation.

The silence in the Kaiba Corp. building was enough to bring a smile on Seto's face as he typed away, catching up on work where there was little work to be caught up on. That fact alone was enough to put him in a good mood. He was so happy to be getting things done that he hardly noticed the sheepish knock on his office door.

"Seto?" Seto's hand froze on the paper he was writing his signature on and his head turned upwards. He hadn't expected to see Kisara standing in the doorway, dressed in her winter best, looking jetlagged but nevertheless, ready to work her shift. Though he was astonished, Seto also noticed his heart had begun to beat faster. It had been two weeks since he had seen her and the sight of her brought forth only positive feelings.

"I didn't expect to see you today. What are you doing here?"

"I was actually thinking about asking you the same thing… is everyone still on vacation and if so, why aren't you?" Seto nodded his head.

"That's right. Work doesn't officially begin again until tomorrow but I couldn't resist coming in when the office was empty to do some work. Did you not see the e-mail with the work schedule for this week?"

"No, I didn't use the computer a lot while I was home. Don't worry about it, though, I actually needed to see you." There was something different about the tone of Kisara's voice. Seto didn't know what to make of it. It was very serious and yet, he could practically feel how nervous she was being around him. Had something happened when she went home? Kisara sat down on the couch and invited Seto to come join her. Seto did as she suggested, sitting beside her. She took a deep breath before turning and facing Seto.

"I'm just going to skip right ahead and be straight with you right now. The reason I came in today was because I wanted to talk to you about something."

"What kind of something?" Seto inquired.

"Something I've been meaning to talk to you about for quite some time." Kisara handed him a piece of paper. Seto looked down and saw that it was a flier promoting a New Years Eve party that was being held by a fellow classmate at Domino City High. Seto looked back up at Kisara with a raised eyebrow.

"I don't get it."

"Will you come with me to the party?" Kisara stared deeply into his eyes, waiting for an answer. Every second that went by without an answer felt like an eternity. It took Seto a moment to find a way to respond.

"What? Like… as a…?"

"Yes. I'm asking you if you will attend this party with me as my date." Seto immediately got up from the couch.

"Kisara, I like to think that over the course of four months, you've gotten to know me better than this. Me? Attending a party? Why on earth would I do something like that?" Seto stated, sounding slightly offended that Kisara would even ask.

"Because it would mean a lot to me… and because I already said I would be bringing someone."

"You said that? To who? Did you say who you would be bringing?" Kisara rose to her feet as well to talk with Seto on eye level.

"Yes, I did say that. I said it to Tea and I told her I would be bringing a date."

"Tea?! Since when do you talk to her? And why would you call me your date?"

"I do have friends, you know. Just because I spend most of my life working doesn't mean I lack a social life completely. I called you my date because, if I didn't know any better, I'd say we had been dating for the last three weeks now."

"We're not dating! We're… we're… we're getting to know each other. That's all." Kisara could feel all sorts of emotions rise up inside of her but she wasn't going to back down. The romantic dinners, the helicopter ride, the nights they had spent hours talking to one another… she knew there was more to them and Seto was only trying to cover up that fact. She could only hope that it wasn't because he wasn't the kind, generous man she had grown to like.

"I don't think it would be farfetched to say that we're more than just friends and definitely past the 'getting to know each other' stage. Am I right or am I just being crazy right now?" Seto shrugged.

"You're absolutely right…" Seto stated, "We're colleagues." There was a sudden rage that surged up within Kisara that she simply couldn't hold back despite the fact that they were both at work. At the office, Seto was her boss and she was supposed to act accordingly to that. In that moment, however… none of that mattered.

"That's the problem I have with you. You take me on dates but you refuse to say we're dating. I invite you to go with me to an event and you act like it's such a surprise I would even want to spend time with you. I don't get it!" The volume in Kisara's voice rose with each word she said. The air was becoming thick with tension and although Seto was afraid of where the conversation was going, he was determined to keep it from going there any further.

"I don't understand. What don't you get?" Kisara gave a frustrated sigh.

"I need to know what we are, Seto. I need to know right now. Do you want to be with me or not because for a while, I thought we were something to each other but if we're not, we can stop pretending to like each other and go back to our regular lives." There it was; the inevitable question and exactly what he had been afraid Kisara would ask. Seto had thought he had more time but now he was faced with the task of giving Kisara an answer. She was clearly upset and his extended silence wasn't making it any better. Seto had to think of something intelligent to say and fast. The only problem was that he didn't know what to say.

"I… uh… look. I'm not good at this…"

"Clearly," Kisara interrupted him to say. Seto glared at her.

"Would you give me a break? I'm trying to be honest with you right now." Kisara took a couple moments before stepping back and realizing how ferocious she was being towards him. She looked down in shame.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. My emotions have gotten the best of me…" Kisara looked up, "This is a sensitive topic for me, okay? I'm just scared that all of those… whatever you call them, things we went on together meant nothing to you because they meant the world to me. What we have… what I think we have… is something special." Seto walked over to Kisara.

"It's special to me too. So special, I'm not sure what to call it yet," Kisara gazed up at him with her hopeful blue eyes. "Does that make any sense? I'm still trying to figure out my own feelings on all of this. I've never experienced anything like this before." Seto handed the flier back to Kisara.

"I get it. You need more time. Since that's the case, you don't have to worry about coming to the party with me. I'll just go by myself." Kisara turned away and headed towards the door.

"Wait, Kisara." Kisara stopped mid-step and turned around. "That doesn't mean I won't go with you."

"So you'll come?" Seto nodded his head.

"Despite how much I hate parties, if it's important to you, then I'll come." Kisara's face lit up and she smiled. Seeing her smile caused Seto to forget everything he hated about parties.

"Thank you," Kisara said, "Pick me up around 10."

"You got it." That was that. Seto Kaiba was officially going to be attending his first New Years Eve party and the only aspect he was looking forward to was spending time with Kisara.

Not a word was spoken between the two of them the entire ride from Kisara's apartment to the party which was being held in Downtown Domino. Downtown Domino was a long way from where Seto lived so it made for almost a half hour ride of complete silence. Kisara didn't know what to say to Seto and Seto felt the same way towards her. She was happy to have Seto come along but she could tell he was already hating the experience. It became even more apparent when they pulled up to the house that was surrounded by cars with booming music being heard from within.

"I do believe this is the destination, Master Kaiba," The driver said, unlocking the doors to let them out, "Do give me a call when you want to be picked up." Seto thought about suggesting to his driver to park the car around the corner since he would want to leave immediately but he couldn't without Kisara hearing. He had to at least try to have a nice time, he had promised Kisara that much in addition to promising to go with her. This was the girl his heart and head had been tormented by during the last two weeks she had been gone. He had to try and muster up those feelings of missing her and wanting her to be happy in order to step foot into the house.

The room became quiet the moment they did. The people gawked at them, quietly whispering amongst one another just before Tea burst out from the crowd to embrace Kisara.

"Kisara, I'm so happy you made it!" Tea squealed, hugging Kisara. She stopped jumping up and down when she noticed Seto standing beside her. "Kaiba? What are you doing here? Oh wait… are you…?"

"We're colleagues," Kisara stated, giving Tea a very stern look, "Nothing more. I thought it might be nice to have someone I knew escort me to this party." The party attendees soon returned to their normal rambunctious behavior after a while as Seto stood awkwardly next to Kisara. Kisara spent the next couple minutes catching up with Tea and getting the scoop on what had happened so far at the party. Seto, with nothing to do except watch Kisara chat away, found it to be unbearable.

"Can I borrow her for a moment?" Seto asked, pulling Kisara off to the side of the room, "I hate to interrupt your social fun time but I don't know what to do."

"How about you get us something to drink? I think there are some sodas over there," Kisara suggested. Seto nodded. That task sounded easy enough. He maneuvered his way through the dancing crowd of idiotic teenagers to get to the refreshment table. Seto grabbed the first two he saw and turned around, wanting to get back to Kisara as quickly as possible.

Sifting through the crowd, Seto could feel several eyes of his peers watching him move through the room. People shamelessly stared at him in awe only making Seto push past people even faster. He didn't belong here, that much was obvious. Seto hated parties and the attention he drew to himself was one of the many reasons why. He contemplated the most polite way of asking Kisara if they could leave early when he stopped dead in his tracks. Seto caught a glimpse of Kisara and a guy talking to one another. Seto recognized him immediately... it was Jiro, a classmate who shared English class with Seto and Kisara.

Seto lowered himself to blend in with the crowd, slowly inching closer. Kisara was graciously leaning against the wall, chatting away with Jiro in an amicable manner. Jiro, on the other hand, had a smirk on his face and leaned in closer and closer to her with every word he said. Seto was too far away to make out what either of them were saying to one another but Seto could tell from Jiro's body language exactly what he was thinking. Seto tried to remain calm as long as possible until he saw Jiro place his arm around Kisara. It was then that Seto pounced.

"Get the hell away from her!" Seto yelled, springing from the crowd and shoving Jiro off of Kisara.

"What's your problem, man?" Jiro yelled back, "Are you drunk or something?" Kisara immediately got between the two of them.

"Guys, both of you need to calm down." Jiro turned to Kisara.

"Is this your boyfriend or something?"

"No, I'm not her boyfriend," Seto stated, answering for her, "But I'm her friend and I'd appreciate it if you'd never touch her again." Jiro stepped forward.

"You're pretty demanding for a guy who isn't a boyfriend. As far as I know, if you're not her boyfriend, I can touch her all that I want."

"Actually that's not how it works," Kisara butted in, then pulled Seto aside, "Seto, he's drunk. Don't take anything he says too seriously."

"But he touched you."

"Yes, but I could've pushed him off myself. In fact, I can do a lot of things for myself and most of them don't have to resort to violence. Also, if you don't want to define our relationship as anything more than colleagues or friends, then you shouldn't be beating people up as if you're my boyfriend." Seto wanted to be mad but all he felt was surprised. Since when did the conversation go from Seto defending Kisara's safety to him needing to define their relationship?

"Are you guys going to kiss or something? It's almost midnight. You might as well just pucker up and kiss each other," Jiro said with a laugh, grabbing Kisara's arm and pushing her over to Seto. Seto threw the sodas in his hands to the ground and caught Kisara. Once she was back on her feet, again he lunged at Jiro.

"I told you not to touch her," Seto asserted, grabbing Jiro by the collar and shoving him against the wall. "If you lay one more hand on her, I don't know what I'm going to do." The soda had exploded on the ground by Kisara's feet and people were beginning to stare at the incident that was unfolding. At that point, she couldn't take it anymore. It was too embarrassing, it was too confusing, and it was too much to handle.

"That's it, I'm leaving. Goodbye, Seto," Kisara said, turning away and running towards the door. Seto dropped Jiro to the ground and saw Kisara exiting the house. She was upset... but why was she upset with him of all people? Despite how much he tried to rationalize himself being right in the midst of the argument, he knew he was wrong in trying to ignore the validity of Kisara's feelings. She needed to know what they were and maybe it was time he stopped trying to run away from it before he lost her completely.

"Kisara, wait!" Seto called out to her, loud enough that Kisara's stopped just as she was opening the door to leave, grabbing everyone's attention in the room. Kisara swirled around. Seto focused only on Kisara as he spoke, "Kisara... what we are..." Seto paused again, trying to find the exact right words to say everything that she needed to hear, "You're mine. I'm yours. And... I suppose that means we're together. I've always felt this way about us but I could never express it in the right way."

Seto had to take another moment to build up the illusion that he was alone again. It wasn't working very well since there was loud music still playing in the background, but he had to try his best nonetheless. "You have to understand, I've never had to define myself and another person. My whole life, it's only been my brother and I... until I met you. So for now, we're together and that's what we'll be if you wish."

Kisara said nothing to Seto. Someone had even shut off the music in the house, making things even more awkward. No one was even whispering, everyone was so fixated on seeing what would happen next. Things were completely silent until someone shouted, "Hey look! One more minute until the new year!" Seto looked at his watch and sure enough, only a minute was left until the new year began. The mass of people scrambled around the television just as Kisara grabbed him by the arm and pulled him out of the house. Seto could hear people already starting to count down.

"Seto, look at me. Did you really mean what you said to me just now?" Kisara asked when they were outside of the house. Seto nodded.

"I meant every word."

"But why would you say that in front of everyone? Why did you have to embarrass me like that?" Seto was surprised he was still the bad guy after making a declaration of his affection towards her.

"I wasn't trying to embarrass you. I wanted you to know how I felt before you walked out of the door."

"If you were comfortable making such a scene back there, why were you so secretive about us before?" Seto was at a loss for words. From within the house, he could hear people beginning to count down to the last couple seconds. The new year was about to begin.

"Seven!"

"I don't know, I guess I just didn't know how I felt about you until now."

"Six!"

"Don't lie to me like that. You've known how you felt about me since the first time you took me on your helicopter." That was the problem with getting to know another person; eventually they did learn when the other person was being dishonest. Seto didn't want to lie anymore.

"Five!"

"Because I was scared, Kisara," Seto replied, "I didn't know what to expect. You don't know this but the moment we become involved with one another, that's it. The world will forever know that we are attached to one another and the world will act appropriately. My brother's life is in constant danger because of it and I didn't want that to happen to you too. I don't want you to live a life of fear like my brother does." Despite knowing that Kisara would probably walk away from him because of this, Seto knew it had to be said. She had to know what she was getting into before she regretted it for the rest of her life.

"Four!"

"Seto... I have never and will never care about what the rest of the world thinks of me. I have never been afraid of something worth fighting for, it's the reason I came to Japan in the first place and it's the reason I took your job offer to work at Kaiba Corp." Seto eyes widened. "You may not believe this but I was scared too... scared of feeling the way I feel about you right now."

"Three!"

"I'm not sure what else to say..."

"Two!"

"That's okay," Kisara said with a smile, "Neither do I."

"One!"

There had only been a handful of perfect moments that occurred in Kisara's life and she had never let a second of those moments slip away. Just as the crowd began to cheer and ring in the new year, Kisara pulled Seto in for a kiss. Their lips collided with one another in perfect symmetry. Kisara tightened her arms around Seto's neck and closed her eyes, taking the moment in. Seto's surprise slowly melted away and he too, wrapped his arms around her and let the kiss consume him into a euphoric bliss.

The new year had finally begun.

A/N: Wow, this chapter was tough to write. First off, it's longer than a usual chapter is but I'm sure nobody minds. Everything that happened in this chapter had to happen in this one chapter so that's what happened there. Another thing that was difficult was that around this time in the story, people will probably be telling me how OOC Seto is because Seto and romance don't usually go together. Or if they do go together, they don't go together well. Seto is fine when it comes to being stupid in love/relationships but actually having one? NO WAY, THAT'S OOC. Well, sorry folks, if you hate it, you best move on to another story that suits because that's how it all went down. And yes, that kiss was real, deal with it! It took me FOREVER to figure out when the two of them would kiss and I decided this was just too good of a moment to pass up. And on a IRL note, Chicago was amazing. Thanks for reading and reviewing!