Chapter 40 – Bumps in the Road

The next morning Liz waited in Kelly's office for their appointment. She finally entered the room and shook Liz's hand. "Mrs. Morgan, it's so nice to officially meet you," she said smiling. They had seen each other after Tess had been pushed into the water, but never really spoke. "I've looked over your medical records and I can see where they would have come to the conclusion they did based on your past test results, but I'd like to run new tests to see where we stand now. She explained several of the newer tests so that Liz would know what to expect. "Now, I need you to relax for a few of these. Are you going to be able to do that?" She can tell that Liz is nervous.

"I'll try."

"Is there someone you can call to be with you?" she asked.

Liz bit her lip. She probably could get Skye to come in but she doesn't want her mom to know. "I could call my husband. I just didn't want to bother him with this."

"Does he want to have children?"

"Yes, he does. I just didn't want him to be disappointed."

Kelly studied her for a minute. "Elizabeth, you need support. This could end up being a difficult process so you need to let your husband in and let him be there for you. Do you think you can do that?"

Liz nodded. "Okay." She called Jason and waited for him to pick up.

"Baby?" he said worriedly.

"Hi. I hate to bother you, but can you come to the hospital?"

Jason can tell that she seems a little off. What she didn't know is that he is sitting in the waiting room not too far away. "Where are you?"

"I'm in Dr. Lee's office."

"I'll be right there," he said hanging up. He stopped a nurse and asked her for directions and then took off.

Kelly and Liz were shocked when there was a knock on the door a few minutes later.

Jason peeked inside and saw the looks on their faces and smiled. "I was in the waiting room just in case," he said watching his wife's face light up.

"Thank you." She is touched that he is trying to be there for her.

Kelly went over the procedures and then sent them into a room so Liz could change and get ready. An hour and a half later, they were driving home.

IiIiIiIiIiIiIiIiIiIi

"You want to tell me what's going on?" he asked softly. She hadn't said a word the whole ride back to the house.

Liz felt her resolve weaken and she started to cry.

Jason pulled her against him and tried to soothe her. "Baby, please talk to me. I can't help you if I don't know what is wrong."

It took a few minutes, but Liz finally was able to speak. "I'm sorry, Jason. This is so hard for me. Before, I just didn't think about it. I accepted that it couldn't be, but now that I'm opening myself up to the possibilities, I'm just so scared I'm going to be let down; that I'm going to disappoint us both. That's just hard for me to accept."

Jason let her words sink in. He understands how she is feeling, but he just wants to say the right thing to her. Pulling her head back so their gazes can meet, he started to speak.

"Sometimes, you have to take a risk to open yourself up to something really good. Just like we both took a risk in marrying each other and it ended up being the best thing that has ever happened to us. If for some reason this doesn't work out, we can still be happy. We still have each other. Having hope is risky, but I'd rather take risks than live my life in fear. I will support you either way. If you want to go for this, I will be there and if you want to stop this right now, then I will respect that too. It's ultimately your body. I just don't want you to wish that you tried later on down the line when it might be too late to do anything." Jason kissed her tears away. "And I don't think I've ever spoken that many continuous words ever in my lifetime," he said smiling.

Liz smiled back. "What you said was beautiful. Thank you. I want to try Jason. I want this more than anything."

"Just don't shut me out along the way. I'm here for you."

Liz nodded. "At least it will be a lot of fun trying for a baby," she said smiling.

"God woman, I'm not a machine," he said pretending to be offended.

She chuckled. "If you're not up to it Morgan, I'm sure I can find…" Her words were cut off by Jason's mouth.

He kissed her senseless and then pulled back. "Don't even think about it. You're mine."

IiIiIiIiIiIiIiIiIiIi

A transport ambulance brought Johnny back to the house. Jason wanted to make sure that he wasn't injured getting home, so he thought that was the best way. They got him settled in his room and then about an hour later, Skye and Lorenzo arrived in the same manner.

"Hi dad," Liz said before kissing his cheek once he was settled.

"Hi Bella," he said smiling. "The bed is comfortable."

"I'm sure anything would seem more comfortable after being in the hospital," she said adding an extra pillow for him.

"True."

"You want to talk about what happened?" he asked. Lorenzo had been worried about her having PTSD afterward.

"Do you?"

"I asked first."

"I try not to think about it," Liz said softly.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea," Lorenzo said looking at his daughter carefully. He was scared that she'd internalize what she did instead of dealing with it. "Mija, even your mother struggles with what she had to do even though she had no other choice."

Liz swiped a tear away. "I've never been so scared in my life. Everything seemed so surreal, and when Johnny went down, I thought that my life would be over, but despite getting shot, he killed Manny and took care of me." She would never forget that night or watching Johnny get shot.

"And you took care of him," Lorenzo said softly. "You did what you had to do to protect both of you."

"I know. I'm upset that he's hurt because of me more than anything."

"I get that, but are you telling me you don't care that you killed those men?" Lorenzo asked.

"Not really. Does that make me a monster? I mean, they were trying to kill me and I killed them. It wasn't like they showed me any mercy. Why should I give a shit that they are dead?"

Lorenzo sighed. "I'm never going to tell you how to feel, but you have a lot of anger inside of you. I just want you to find a way to let it out so it doesn't eat you alive."

Liz nodded. She knew what he meant, but right now, she is crazy angry and she isn't even sure where it is all coming from. She stood. "I'll come back in a while," she said kissing her father on the head.

He watched her walk out and silently prayed that she'd find a way to deal with everything. The attack had been hard on everyone. Sleeping is a luxury he missed. His body is a constant reminder of what happened to him, but in time, he will feel better.