"Are you sure you won't come?" Arnold stuffed a wad of socks into his scruffy old bag.
"Most of those didn't even match, Shortman." Helga lounged upside-down on his bed, her feet propped up on his headboard.
"That's not an answer."
"You already know my answer. No, I don't want to come."
"But it's Christmas!"
"It's always something."
"Grandma will miss you."
She frowned. "Arnold, your grandma thinks we're dating. Now that you're with Maya, it seems highly inappropriate to perpetuate that misconception by staying with you over Christmas. Last summer was bad enough."
"But… it's not like you were supposed to stay…"
"Yeah, I know. Bob happened. But it still doesn't feel right."
"It doesn't feel right that you're spending Christmas alone."
Helga just shrugged. "I'm really not that cut up about it, to be honest." She had a long list of books she wanted to read over the next three weeks. "And I'm having dinner with Dyna, remember?"
He didn't look convinced.
"Look, Shortman. I know you have all these romantic holiday notions about family and togetherness… but I don't have that family, OK?"
He still didn't look convinced, but he didn't say anything more about it. He got other people to do it for him after he left…
"Just come, OK?" Maya had her fed up voice on. "I think the whole she can't be alone at Christmas thing is condescending as hell, but you should actually come just because it'll be fun. Also, Toni's going to make eggnog."
"Gak. Eggnog." Helga stuck her tongue out. "But yeah, sure. I'll tag along… as long as you don't make me drink any of that crap."
"You're a philistine."
"Sure… I'm OK with that."
Maya had a low laugh, almost like Arnolds. "Alright then, you pleb. I'll pick you up around sixish."
So, that was her Christmas eve-eve sorted out, and she was going upstairs to have dinner with Dyna in an hour or so… so much for Arnold's irrational insistence that she was turning into a hermit or something. Maya was right, Arnold was beingcondescending, and annoying… but she didn't have time to dwell on that, she was late for dinner, and judging from the footsteps echoing from upstairs, Dyna had company…
"Oh Helga!" Dyna was beaming. "Come through! I'm running late, I'm sorry."
She was so lovely. In her little apron with flour on her cheek. The perfect picture of housewifeliness. "Can I help with anything?"
"No! No no. I'm almost done. But come through, Joel's come a day early!"
Ah. The son. It was strange that they'd been living here for over a year, but had never met Dyna's kids. She'd seen enough photos of them though. Dyna had pictures of the two smiling children all over the house, both very American looking, blonde, with the straightest teeth money could buy… it would be interesting to see what they were like.
"Joel! Helga's here!"
"Coming Ma."
Ma. Helga almost giggled… but it stuck in her throat when he stepped out into the hall. Whoa.
"Hey." The guy smiled, extending his hand, "You're clearly Helga. I'm Joel."
"Clearly." She quipped, and his smile grew wider as she took his hand… Oh, that smile was charming… charming and just a little arrogant. There was something almost challenging about the slant of his lips and his raised eyebrow, and Helga felt her own lips mirror that smirk.
"Don't call me Claire."
"Surely you can't be serious?"
Her retort earned her one of the best laughs she'd ever heard. Loud and uninhibited… it almost reminded her of Bob, but without any malice. Oh dear…
"Alright Shirley… come through. Can I get you a drink of anything?"…
He joked his way through dinner, and while Dyna obviously doted on him, he wasn't the all-American lacrosse player type that she'd been expecting. If anything, he was rather cynical, though very polite, and he obviously loved his mother.
"Are you sure I can't get you another drink, Helga?"
"No, really. Thanks Dyna… I've had more than enough already." And she had, she could feel her cheeks were flushed, and she was talking louder than normal…
"Or some more pudding? There's plenty left."
"God, Ma. Leave the girl alone."
"Oh shush, you." Dyna whacked at Joel with her serviette. "Make yourself useful and finish off that bottle."
He turned to Helga, "See how she treats me? At this rate, my liver will pack in before New Years."
Dyna just rolled her eyes. "I have to do some more work on my cake, apologies darlings." She was just so dainty as she set her napkin down and pushed her chair back. "Cup of tea? I'll put the kettle on." And without waiting for an answer, she tripped back into the kitchen.
Joel sighed contentedly as he poured the last of the wine into his glass and settled back into his seat. That vaguely challenging look was back in his eyes.
"So, Claire…" Helga raised an eyebrow, "how is it that I've been living here for a year and a half, and we haven't met before now?"
He chuckled, a less raucous sound than his huge laugh, but it still did funny things to her insides… "Well, Shirley, no doubt Ma's already wailed on to you about how I don't visit enough… what are you doing?"
"Uh, what does it look like?" She gestured to the plate in her hand. "I can't juggle, by the way… so it's not that."
"No." He shook his head. "Guests don't clear up. Put it down, have another drink."
For the first time that evening, Helga frowned. "This guest does, Dyna's done enough… and the last of the drink is in your glass."
"I'll share." Ohhhh… that grin changed from challenging to cheeky. Her stomach gave a little squeeze as he held his glass out to her. "And Ma won't do anything. I'll do the dishes, I promise. Now please, put it down and just let me enjoy your company."
Helga held up her hands in defeat, and leaned over to take his offered glass – despite her earlier protestation of already being drunk enough. "Fair enough… I am a sparkling conversationalist…"
He snorted at that one. "Actually…" he grinned, "if you'd like to treat me to more of your sparkling conversation, you could play host to me tomorrow night? Lucy gets in tomorrow, and it's wise for me to give her and Ma some alone time to catch up. Or I find out far more about my sister than I'm comfortable with knowing."
"Ah. No can do, sorry sir. I have plans…" She took a sip of his wine while he shrugged. "But you could probably come with me? It's just dinner at a friends house… and you'd be a guest, so you wouldn't even need to do the dishes."
… By the time Helga stumbled back downstairs – promising to check with Toni if Joel was welcome for dinner the next evening – she was still half drunk and very tired, but her mind was buzzing. God help me… he's gorgeous. She stripped off and flopped back onto her bed, gazing happily at the ceiling.
You're pathetic, Pataki. She chided herself, but she couldn't make herself actually care. Joel was just lovely. Though obviously nothing was going to happen, seeing as he was Dyna's son and all… but still, this was fun.
She could hear Joel's heavy footfalls, and the chink of dishes as he tidied up, as promised. Yeah… there was something very, very sexy about a guy that waited on his mother. Very sexy indeed.
Clambering under her covers, she fumbled around in her bedside drawer for her favourite vibrator. Without bothering to play music – another boon to having the flat to herself – she turned the little bullet on and nestled it between her legs. If she didn't want to make a fool of herself, then the last thing she needed to be around this guy was sexually frustrated…
** If anyone doesn't get the "Surely you can't be serious" reference… check out the movie "Airplane". Classic.