Interlude: Christopher Gale (Kid Win)

"She managed to escape?!" He'd rarely heard Hannah angry, but it was unmistakable in her tone now. "Last thing we heard was that you had her in your sights, what exactly happened?"

"I did manage to find her, and confront her. When she ran I pursued for approximately five city blocks. She, at that point, ran into a laundromat. I lost direct sight for all of ten seconds. In those seconds she slipped out of her ash armor and made it continue moving in a mimicry, like she was still inside. While my focus was on it she changed into civilian clothes and merged with with the panicking crowd. With no way to know what she'd been wearing before I had no means of finding her in the crowd."

"I can't believe I'm still on friggin suspension."

Chris hadn't realized he'd spoken aloud till Carlos answered him.

"You're not. You're just on leave. You'll be reinstated next week." He paused, turned to look at the Tinker. "You know that outside of Class-A or S emergencies, any Ward who went what you went through plus what your parents said-"

"Fuck what my dad wanted. I'm fine!" Chris snarled back as he continued to hear Miss Militia speak with Legend. Legend was accepting full responsibility for Taylor's escape.

Velocity had been the second hero on scene and between him and Legend, who had flown back, they'd managed to catch at least two of the Undersiders, Regent and Hellhound, or Bitch as she liked to be called for god only knew what reason. So it wasn't a total loss.

Regent was in the hospital waiting on treatment, getting thrown by a Brute Five into a metal newspaper bin didn't do much for one's health. Who'd have thought.

Hellhound was caught because she refused to leave her two wounded animals.

The third dog was wrangled up and caught as well on the boardwalk. The animal had been sitting obediently and snapped at whoever came at it but didn't chase. The people had waited till it had reverted back to its natural state before going in for the capture, for obvious reasons. The dog had sat patiently for two hours til it reverted, then snarled and bit at whoever tried to get near it. The results from normal dog to giant rhino-monster-dog-beast thing obviously varied.

Grue and Tattletale escaped.

He sat down and listened to the debrief. The two captured Undersiders would be interrogated and would be held in the PRT holding facilities for the foreseeable future. As it stood there were so many issues with prisoner housing they were moving more long term prisoners out of state, and commandeering the juvenile facilities for those either waiting on trial or good behavior. Last he'd heard even the old, defunct, police building by the old train yards was being considered for a fast retrofit to just get another building to stuff prisoners into.

By the time they (The Wards) were dismissed an hour later it was night already, the last vestiges of the sun had already gone away beneath the horizon and he was hungry and tired. Miss Militia and Legend were still in the room, with Piggot only just arriving now. Ready to discuss what exactly would be told to the press with Taylor's return. All things considered, they'd managed to keep the finer details out of the media's eye but that luxury was rapidly wearing out its welcome.

He'd overheard some of the guards as well, and word was Piggot was on her way out. Either Taylor had caused too much of a mess or she'd caused too much of a mess with Taylor and Sophia beforehand. He wasn't sure.

And if it was true… he wasn't sure.

On the one hand Piggot was a hard ass, rarely if ever gave out praise or gratitude, and was a bit of a bitch. She'd also brought in Sophia and… completely fucked up in regards to that and Taylor back at Winslow if even half of what he'd heard was correct.

On the other, this was Brockton Bay. What were the chances they'd get someone worse? And not necessarily worse personality wise but worse in terms of competence. If the PRT and Protectorate didn't have a hard ass at the helm that could stay on the ball they'd be completely screwed with so many villains just up the road. Literally.

Piggot could toe the line and keep things more or less on the level… at least till Coil had gone and put a stick of dynamite on the side of the boat.

Could the next person manage?

He wasn't sure, better the devil you know and all that.

He walked down the hall towards the Wards dormitories.

He walked to the refrigerator, peeking in, fully stocked as usual. He was hungry, thirsty. Didn't know what the hell to drink. Or eat. He settled on water for lack of anything he could think of.

"Hey Chris."

He turned around, saw Missy marching in before she collapsed onto the couch, picking up the TV remote.

"Hey." He called back. "How're you doin Missy?"

She shrugged, didn't even make a sound. She had been like that ever since Dean's ratting on Piggot with Legend in the room.

…

Yeah. The hell could they say about it that hadn't already been said? He sighed through his nostrils quietly. Then he marched up the stairs to his room. He made it in and closed the door behind him. The usual mess of half finished tinker tech gear was there to greet him.

All he had done since coming back to PRT HQ was finish up installing new pieces into his costume and equipment, and even finish some half-finished projects he had left on hiatus the last two weeks. All of which were pending approval.

But that was it. He wasn't out there with everyone. He hadn't searched for Taylor nor given any kind of meaningful help to anyone...

He shook his head, deciding to go to bed early.

He just wanted to get to tomorrow at this point.

(X)

When he got to school the next day, nothing had changed. They went to class, half listened to the teachers. Everyone else kept on talking about the latest thing. The latest party, the latest scandal, the latest fib. Things that he couldn't even bring himself to pretend to care about.

Who would honestly give a shit that Arcadia's team lost the game last Tuesday when a friend had a double, probably triple, digit body count and was fast becoming a wanted criminal?

He honestly couldn't stomach sitting here. Carlos was out patrolling with Dennis and Brendan. Missy was on monitor duty. Dean was the only one here besides himself and even he had Vicky to talk to about this. To get away from the sheer… pettiness.

When the bell rang for lunch hour he was practically the first one out the door, marching down towards the schools workshop for some quiet. Some escape from the so called normal people.

When he made it to the room, he closed the door behind him, immediately tossing his bookbag on a table and pulling up a chair.

Then… he sat there.

For minutes he just sat there and breathed. He wasn't even sure what he was angry at. Oh he knew why he was angry. It was easy. He was wasting time, he was in school, Taylor was gone, He hadn't been able and still wasn't able to help his friends, everything was going to hell in a handbasket, a villain had their civilian ID's, a villain that had already attacked Mr. Hebert so it was someone willing to break the unwritten rules for an edge.

He was pissed because of all these things.

And… now that he thought about it he knew what he was pissed at. He was pissed at the fact that there was nothing he could fucking do about it!

There was no one he could go after, no one he could yell at or argue with, no tinker-tech device he could turn to with the answer. It was just sit here and wait. Wait for his new devices to pass inspection, wait for him to be taken off leave, wait for someone to spot Taylor again, wait for someone to get some information on Coil. Wait to get out of this goddamn school. Everything was just a matter of waiting which was the very last thing he wanted to keep doing.

The door was slammed open.

"There you are!"

His head snapped up, blinking as he stared at the doorway, where he found none other than Aisha Labourne marching towards him.

She looked angry.

"Alright I'm sick of this shit! What the hell happened to Taylor, Chris!? Talk!"

"I don't know." He answered automatically. "I heard she was-"

"Oh stop bullshitting! Its obvious you're a Ward! What happened!?"

"Aisha I'm not-"

"You, Dean, and Dennis." She went over each name with a finger. "And I just haven't figured out who Aegis or Browbeat are yet but it'll happen too. Vista's out too, though she is either a short teen or a pre-teen."

He blinked. They'd always known she could find out their ID's since they hung out with Taylor to see it happen though that was a bit of a slap to the face.

"I'm not a Ward Aisha and if you go saying that Dean and Dennis are then you can get in trouble whether they are or aren't either way."

She reached over and grabbed a chair, wheeling it over to get right next to him. She plopped down, hard.

"Chris. What. Happened?"

His lips pursed. "Look Aisha I'm sorry but I'm not-"

"Fine whatever, your face says it all anyway. You don't have to say you're a Ward just tell me that Tay's alright Chris." She glared at him. "Quit bullshitting me here." She softened up a little. "Please…"

"I…" He was about to say he didn't know when he clicked his mouth shut. She was Taylor's friend. Maybe one of the few left since the prison events… He couldn't speak for the others no matter how much he wanted to believe they still held her as such.

"Last I heard she was… really sick." He answered.

"How sick? Scale of one to ten?"

He shrugged. It honestly was the best answer he could give.

"What happened to all of you. Ever since the prison break you go missing school for almost a week, Tay hasn't come back yet. When you do show up everyone shows up half dead or looking like they'd rather be dead. Vicky is snapping at people. Ames hasn't even been showing up to class half the time. What exactly went on over there? I mean… I know some of you were injured but Amy can fix that up in a second or two right. I mean, besides Assault. He's screwed. Sorry. That came out wrong. I shouldn't have said that." Aisha looked away.

Chris sighed. Assault's death made the news, Aisha would know about it. And while news of Wards being injured had also made the news, his and Stalker's names hadn't been released. She probably thought Taylor was injured too.

"So… how long til Tay gets better?"

"Last I heard…" He drawled, still keeping up with the, by now, paper thin pretense. "They're not sure if she CAN get better… its not just a physical problem, its largely mental… emotional." Aisha remained quiet.

"Oh… I see… that's why… Amy doesn't heal brains."

He grimaced. He'd take that simplicity over their current reality.

He blinked, a thought occurring to him.

"Aisha… you knew Taylor before right? In Winslow?"

"Well… I wouldn't say knew. But… yeah I guess."

"Did you like… ever talk at all?" He leaned forward. "Did the names Emma or Madison ever get tossed around?"

He was about to ask about Velstadt but before he could her features darkened, bared her teeth, and her voice emerged nearly as a shout. "What the fuck did those bitches do!?"

Her anger was surprising. He'd never seen her so mad. "So… you do know them?" He made a note of reference not to piss her off. Ever.

"Yeah those bitches are the ones that fucked with Taylor the most back at Winslow. Emma, Madison and Sophia; ask anyone in our age group from Winslow. It wasn't exactly a secret."

Sophia was pegged with them in her mind. Did that mean… "Did… they have something to do with Taylor… umm."

"You mean her burning down Winslow? I can't say with one hundred percent but they're definitely on my top two suspects on a list of three."

He frowned. "You got a last name for them? That would help a lot."

"Madison Clements. Other bitch is Barnes I think. Daddy's a lawyer."

He frowned, blinking. Didn't Vicky's mom work with a Barnes? Or no relation?

He shook his head. Question for another time. "What about Velstadt?"

Her face scrunched "What about who now?"

"Velstadt? You ever hear of that name? Nickname perhaps?"

"Name like that I'm thinking E88 lunatic. Or some guy working Jessy-shaft."

He shook his head. "No. Nothing that the records on… ummm…. PHO have on anyone of that name in E88. And it's Gesellschaft."

She grinned at his slip up. "PHO. Riiiiiight."

He could feel the blush on his cheeks. "So… that name doesn't ring a bell?"

"Not to me."

"The two girls are in this school?"

"God no." She scoffed. "Considering how pissed Taylor was with just me being around I could only imagine our little Hebert would've had to choke a bitch if she ever caught sight of Sophia, Madison, or Emma ever again."

'You have no idea.' He thought. "Immaculata then."

"Or arrested." He glanced at her. She shrugged. "Last I heard the bitch trio were going off to court for the whole shitstorm. I'd say they're in juvie right now." She hopped up off her chair. "Don't worry. Aisha's on the case! I'll find them for you!"

His face scrunched up. "You're not Dick Tracy or something are you Aisha?"

"Dick who?" She waved him off. "Whatever, doesn't matter. I've got people."

"You don't have people." He actually had to stop himself from grunting out an incredulous 'Do you?' … then again, she did come from Winslow.

…

"Some day I might." She pouted. "Now shush! I'mma go find shit out with logic and science now." She gave him a wink.

He shook his head as the girl skipped out of the room. Literally… skipped. "Riiiight."

She was about to reach the door when there was a commotion outside, the raised voices of a dozen or so students catching their attention.

"What the hell?" He stood up. Aisha shrugged.

They marched out, just in time to see the students rushing towards one of the cyber rooms.

"Hey what's going on?" He called.

"Legend's on the news!" One of the students called back. "Says they're gonna get into what finally went down with that new Parahuman villain in the prison. Press conference coming out!"

"Oh cool." Aisha grinned, marching forward eagerly as Chris felt his heart drop into his stomach.

(X)

Surtr.

That's what they ended up calling her.

Well… not Her. Well… it was her but not. At least the rest of the world didn't think it was her.

He'd looked up the name immediately. Some kind of Norse myth. A fire giant with a burning sword that was supposed to bring about the end of the world. Were they trying to fuck her over and not bring her back?

Sure they were saying it was an entirely different cape "to the best of their knowledge" but if anyone ever found out Taylor and Surtr were one in the same, cries for Birdcage would ring out louder than the Canary Incident.

They'd also sent out a general warning to the public that Taylor herself was under Master influence, to explain that yes, that was indeed Legend firing on a Ward the other day. Warning the civilians that, should they encounter Ashburn in the street, to call the PRT immediately and report signs of witnessed erratic behavior. Along with the usual spiel about how the PRT deeply regretted the fact that one of their Wards had been victimized in such a way and that all efforts would be made to bring the Master to justice.

That part did make him feel a little better though. The reminder that there was someone out there that was twisting her thoughts to help turn her against them.

It was a very depressing day when the silver lining was that your friend was being mind controlled by some sick bastard.

When his phone rang, he answered it without looking at the caller ID. "Hello?"

"Hey! I got somethin! Found out where Barnes and Clements live!"

He blinked, pulling his phone free of his ear to look at it. Aisha's picture smiled back at him tongue sticking out, her name plastered over the top half of the screen with the addition of 'Bae Bae'.

"Aisha?"

"Yup yup."

"How'd you put your number on my phone?" He'd remember if he'd have asked for her number at any time.

"I have people."

…

…

"Ok ok, you left it in your locker during gym class."

"How do you know the combination of my locker?

"I've got-"

"Don't say you have people!"

"I was gonna say I've got my ways thank you very much. Mh." He could almost see her sticking her tongue out at him. "Anyway. Come on, I found where Clements and Barnes live. Lets go get some answers!"

"Uhhh how?"

"I know where they live. Duh. Meet me at Sears. We can take the bus to their place. Probably Barnes first. Hated that fake-ass Scarlet JoJo anyway." Chris put a hand to his face and dragged it.

"How are we supposed to ask them questions? You think they'll talk?"

"Of course. Hopefully. Maybe! See ya there!" He heard her dial tone as she hung up and sighed.

(X)

The two walked casually in the gated community. Grantland Woods was one of the higher class gated communities in the Bay suburbs, situated with a good view of the city and nestled over the hills on the North side.

If Emma's father was a lawyer, it'd make sense he'd live in this place this.

"You need to relax Chrissy. Let people think of us as a couple or somethin'." She grinned as she took his hand in hers

"First. Don't call me Chrissy. Ever." Chris spoke back to her. "Number two, we're not a couple. And three how on earth did you even get her address?"

"I know people and I scouted the place. In order."

"Scouted?"

"Of course. Can't just walk into a place like this. These people are weird."

...

"Riiight, so where is the place we're going to?" He asked, hands in pockets.

"Okay… should be the next street… made a note of it on my phone…" Aisha looked on her phone, and back up to the street signs. "There we go."

A security guard patrol passed by, he felt Aisha grab his arm and tug him close, whispering into his ear.

"Act casual."

Chris looked at her oddly. "What do you mean act casual? It's not like he's gonna stop and shake us down."

"That's good. You're a natural at this."

He blinked. Was she serious?

"This is all subtle stuff man."

Yup. Yup. Evidently she was serious...

They marched around the corner and found the house in question. Two stories, all doors closed, lights off. He didn't see any cars though he supposed they could be in the garage.

"Doesn't look like there's anyone home. Should we go?" He asked.

"Hell no. We're getting info. We've come too far Chrissy. You want answers as bad as me so lets get em!"

Chris furrowed his brows. She was right. He did want answers.

Whatever made her turn into that thing that attacked the everyone was something that had to do with her history. He wanted to know.. She never opened up, if only a little, during her four months as a Ward. She never delved into her past and neither did he. The only time was that one moment outside Fugly's with Dean. Right before meeting Aisha now that he thought of it.

He could always ask Stalker when she recovered. But she was so hostile to anyone and everyone he'd have more luck squeezing water from a rock. Every word she spoke might be a lie to spite him or Taylor.

If this Emma girl was any different… if she had some answers...

Aisha walked to the front door, almost with a bounce to her step. She knocked on the door, humming a tune.

"I guess nobody's home." He said softly. Aisha's cheeks puffed up in a pout as she knocked again.

He was about to suggest they take a walk around the rest of the gated comunity to wait for the Barnes to return, but before he could he was cut off by the rattle of the door knob. He and Aisha perked up as it opened a crack..

"H-Hello?" Spoke a meek voice as the door opened, and there before him was a girl around his age and…

"Emma? Is that you?" Aisha spoke, surprised and wide-jawed at the girl before her. Chris remained quiet. He didn't know this girl, so this was his first impression of her. Aisha spoke of her as 'Queen Bee' and assumed she would look a lot like Victoria in looks, physique and demeanor.

She was a redhead, but her hair was frazzled. Like she just got out of bed, but she was wide awake. It was more like she hadn't put in product or taken good care of it in months. There were bags under her eyes. They were wide, she looked frightful and uneasy. She was wearing a Boston Celtic's T-shirt and baggy pajama pants...

"W-Who are you… how do you know my name?" This 'Emma' spoke up, her voice almost on the verge of breaking.

This was Emma Barnes?

The Queen Bee Megalomaniacal Alpha Bitch of Winslow?

Definitely didn't look the part.

"Went to Winslow." Aisha spoke up. "And he is with me. My beau. I'm his 'bae bae'." Chris's head snapped towards Aisha his mouth dropping open in surprise. An indignant squeak left him as Aisha wrapped her hand around his waist. The slip of a girl had a grip like a vice, holding him in place no matter how much he tried to squirm.

What the flying fuck?

"Anywaaaaays," Aisha drawled. "I wanna ask ya some questions Emma. You uhhh… free at all?" She asked. She was still stupefied for some reason. She must have not expected Emma to look like well… Amy after a sixteen hour binge shift with no coffee… only far less violent…

And people said Vicky had a short temper...

"I… I guess so. Umm… Dad will be back soon if you wanted to talk to him instead."

"Oh no. This is all you."

"I ummm… don't recall you from Winslow." Emma opened the door a little, leaning against the frame. Chris spotted the secret curves. Victoria had the larger assets but Emma was a close second.

He's a boy. He notices.

"Well you were pretty popular. I mean, with what you did to my friend and all." Aisha spoke, hand on her hip, he noticed the shift in her tone. Its normal jovial nature eroding with an almost eerie even-ness.. "Emma… Have…" She paused, as if choosing her words in her heads. "I mean, you look… different. What happened to you?" She asked, sounding unsure again.

"I uhhh… its a long story…" Emma looked to the side.

"Because of what you did to Taylor?"

He saw her seize up, her whole body going rigid.

Aisha, if she noticed, didn't let it show as she plowed straight onward. "You should be spending time in the slammer, instead you're here at home with daddy?" Emma paled, biting her lower lip.

"I… It..." The girl shivered right in front of them. "The… The prison's are full…" She offered meekly.

"What exactly happened?" He spoke for the first time, brows furrowing. "What exactly did you do with Sophia and Madison, and who is Velstadt?"

"I… I think you have to go." She moved to close the door when Aisha was there, her foot interposing itself between the door and the frame before she threw her full weight behind her shoulder.

Somewhere, his mind noted that he'd just witnessed an act of forced entry.

…

…

Oh god… He was aiding and abetting a criminal act!

Oh shit!

"Uh-uh. I got my ass into three busses and one really nasty taxi to talk to you so we're gonna talk."

"I don't wanna talk about it!" She shouted, her eyes were wide like a deer's caught in the headlights.

"Well that's just too bad."

He stepped forward, placing a hand on Aisha's shoulder before she could actually walk in and make this even worse.

"Alright look… just… just where was the last time you saw Taylor?"

"Saw?" She swallowed, looking on the verge of tears.

"Yes. Saw. Where was the last time you physically saw her or were in any kind of contact with her. Was it recent?"

"N-No! I… I haven't seen her since… since…"

"When you made up the idea to toss Tay into a locker filled with bloody tampons and other shit?" The girl winced like she was physically slapped. He did too now that he'd heard what actually happened. "You know." Aisha continued. "I really gotta ask because I always found it weird. Did you really get off on that shit you did? Didn't you have anything better to do? Or are you just that fucked in the head that you have to try and make yourself feel big and strong by fucking with someone who can't hurt you because you know you've got the deck stacked?"

Emma was silent, sniffling a little. Chris looked at the glaring Aisha. He had to wonder if there wasn't a little projection going on here. He'd never seen her this angry before…

"Answer the question bitch, why did you bully-"

"I don't know Ok? I don't! It was stupid and..." She yelled, fists clenching at her sides.. "No more… I'm not like Sophia… not any… not any…" She muttered, wrapping arms around herself and muttering under her breath as her hands rose to fist into her hair. "Not me… not me… no predator… no prey… no predator… no prey… doesn't work… doesn't exist..."

Chris reeled, almost wide eyed.

The girl was a wreck.

"Aisha I think-"

"Are you seriously crying you fucking-"

"Aisha, seriously I think that's enough." Aisha rounded on him, glaring back.

"Hey you don't know fuckers like this Ok!? They're fucking pathetic! Tay didn't have anyone to beat the shit out of this bitch when she went too far! Fucking croc tears! Don't buy into this crap!"

He looked back at the girl, still muttering under her breath, tears falling from the edge of her nose to strike the hardwood floor. She was still gripping at her hair, not even looking at them. If she was acting, she was going for an emmy.

"Aisha look, she's a mess ok? Even if you're right that's not what we came here for!" Chris looked at her. He wanted to ask more. Ask for what happened, or who Velstadt was. It didn't look like he'd get an answer... "Look... we're friends of Taylor's… if that wasn't obvious… and she's... been sick and missing. We were wondering that if she ever came by. And if you ever heard the name of Velstadt..."

She didn't answer, still muttering under her breath and shaking her head.

Yeah… this wasn't gonna get them anywhere..

"Lets just go." He sighed.

"Fucking useless." Aisha hissed before they both marched out of the house. He closed the door behind them.

They walked out the same way they came in, round the bend and down the hill where the guard shack and gate was. There they could catch a bus.

"What exactly was that back there?"

"What?"

"Never seen you that angry." He clarified. "You… you ok?"

She shrugged. "Just pisses me off. Person hurts someone else then they think they can get a slap on the wrist, a litteral get out of jail free card and then look all weepy and pretend she's sorry and Tay's still fucked over. Doesn't work that way."

"What if she really is sorry? What if the guilt and regret is eating at her? I mean, did you look at her?"

"Damage is done anyway. So that 'sorry' and a quarter won't even get you on the bus to Shitsville in my book."

He closed his mouth. Everyone had their own baggage. Maybe bullies was an issue with her too. One thing's for sure, she knows how to hold a grudge.

"Maybe we'll have better luck with Madison." She ventured.

"I'm doing the talking this time Jacklyn Slash."

She stuck her tongue out at him.

(X)

Emma shivered in front of the closed door, rubbing herself on her arms as she walked through the silent house, up the stairs and into the bathroom, stumbling and wobbling almost like a drunk.

"Not a predator… no prey…" She muttered over and over like a mantra, looking into the mirror at herself.

She should have stayed in prison… should have stayed there. She needed to talk to Yamada again… in prison it was twice a week… out here she hasn't seen her since she got out. Conflicting schedules… clearing paper work with the parole officer for her to leave her house arrest.

The electronic anklet felt heavy on her.

She was trying… trying to return to some vague semblance of normalcy…

It was the farthest thing from easy…

She wasn't a predator. She wasn't a predator and no one was prey. The world didn't work that way, that safety blanket didn't exist anymore. And every day she missed when the world was so much simpler. When she had the self assuredness that people wouldn't be able to hurt her.

But to live in a world where what those asian fucks tried to do would be fine… She abhorred that thought even more.

And sometimes she just couldn't help it. Couldn't help but just see it again. Like one saw a 'man' and a 'woman' The difference between the two was there, plain as day and she could see it at a glance.

Prey.

Predator.

Sophia was her friend.

Sophia had saved her life.

Sophia had fucked her up.

She looked down at the bathroom counter, gripping the edges as she looked down, sniffing and wiping the tears from her eyes.

Those two were predators, especially the black girl. The white boy was one too, but was more reserved. Subtle. Restrained even.

She grabbed at her head. "No… nononono… Stop stop it. I can't do that again. I can't keep thinking like this… I have to… be normal again."

"Normal? Stupid bitch there is no such thing as normal. Look at this entire fucking world! Endbringers fuck over people whenever they want where they want. Ellisburg. The Slaughterhouse Nine. Back in the day, Inferno. All these so called normal people do is get preyed on because others are stronger. Because that's what they do Emma. It's the natural order of this world. That's all they're ever meant to be. Prey for the big predators. That's what you wanna be? You wanna be a weak little shit with no power? Walking around in a world where any of the chinks and fucks out there can hurt you? Sell you to someone for their amusement? Fuck Yamada and her bullshit. Normal isn't worth it."

She tugged at her hair again almost as if she was trying to pull her traitorous thoughts out of her skull. "Shut up. Shut up. Shut up!"

She ran out of the bathroom, rushing to her room, towards her phone. Her fingers fumbled over the touch screen, tears blurring her eyes as she searched for the number, her breath hitching in her chest and choking her throat.

Weak fingers let the phone slip from her grasp, allowing it to tumble and crack on the floor, its battery flying out to slip across the ground, the screen spider-webbing with cracks.

Her cry could have been heard across to her neighbor's home.

"This is what you want huh? To be afraid and crying, curled up on your floor. You wanna keep being this pathetic? Wanna be like Taylor? Wanna cry yourself to sleep for a week? Every day for the rest of your miserable life?"

She curled up into a ball, eyes clenching shut why couldn't she just stop thinking!

"I don't wanna be a monster." She sobbed. "Don't wanna be a monster…"

"You'd rather be afraid then? You wanna just live in fear?"

She panted, shivering on the floor. Knees folded up beneath her, her breath frosting in front of her.

Cold… it was so cold…