A/N: I thought the last chapter was harder to write, but no... THIS one was. That's why it took a while to update, sorry! Anywho, I hope this chapter isn't too weird or confusing. I'll explain more at the end. This chapter was a doozy to write because I did not know how I wanted to go about writing this particular scene but my next chapters are a little more well-thought out and I'm hoping they'll be easier to write... which means faster updates for you!

Also, Gavroche will be coming into the story in the next few chapters... although I will not be including Azelma in this story.

Disclaimer: I do not own Les Mis. If I did I would be chilling with the cast of Les Mis on my private yacht.

CHAPTER FOUR: Only Been Pretending

May 31st, 1832

Éponine heard masculine voices chattering excitedly above her in the Café Musain. As she ascended the staircase, she wondered how Marius would react when she told him that she refused to find Cosette for him. That was not true, of course; Éponine had already discovered where she lived earlier in the day… but Éponine was not going to disclose that information to Marius. Instead she was going to pull him aside and tell him that she refused to be his errand girl. If he wanted to pursue Cosette, then he would have to pluck up the nerve himself and approach her; she wanted no part of it. With a determined expression on her face, Éponine came to a halt at the top step and searched the room for Marius.

"Pontmercy is not here yet, mademoiselle," said a low voice beside her. She jumped a little when she saw Enjolras sitting by himself at the table closest to her.

Éponine nodded. "I'll wait for him."

Enjolras sighed and gestured to the chair across from him. "Would you like to sit down?"

As Éponine lowered herself into the chair, she asked, "Is there something you would like to speak to me about, monsieur?"

"As a matter of fact, there is." Enjolras shifted in his seat, unsure how to speak tactfully to her on the subject of Marius. He recalled how easily Éponine got angry when he spoke to her about Marius before and he did not want to repeat that mistake. However, Enjolras was not used to beating around the bush.

"Mademoiselle, I know you are in love with Pontmercy, that much is obvious."

Éponine immediately tensed, thinking: What are you getting at?

Enjolras continued. "What I want to know is why you are chasing after a man that does not reciprocate your feelings?"

"That," said Éponine through clenched teeth, "is none of your concern, monsieur. It is my life and I shall do whatever I please."

Rolling his eyes, Enjolras folded his arms on the table. "I am no expert when it comes to the emotion of love–"

"What a surprise," muttered Éponine under her breath.

"– but clearly this whole ordeal is putting you through a lot of pain. To be perfectly honest I fail to see the logic in this line of thinking. Why continue to pine for him when he is clearly in love with someone else?"

"Stop it," Éponine murmured. This was the last topic she wanted to discuss this right now. "You do not understand how I feel."

Enjolras half-smirked, having to intention of leaving the subject alone until she heard his point of view. "I think I do, mademoiselle. You are not in love with Marius: you are in love with the idea of Marius."

Éponine blinked. "That is… not true," she finished somewhat lamely.

"Think about it, Éponine: do you know what he is really like? Do you know his personality? Have you ever asked him about his past or what he wants to do with his future? If you were truly in love with him you would take the time to get to know him. You would not just sit back and pine for him from afar, dreaming of what could be. No, mademoiselle, you are not in love with Marius. You are in love with the idea that he can rescue you from the streets and make you happy. This is why you are having doubts about telling him where the girl lives, I can see it in your eyes. You are finally starting to realize that you are not really in love with Marius after all."

By the time Enjolras had finished speaking, Éponine's jaw was agape. All this time spent fawning over Marius was a waste? Everything that Éponine felt when she was around him was a lie? No… Enjolras could not be more wrong. I do love Marius! What I feel for him is real. I will not let some bourgeois revolutionary tell me what I am feeling!

Despite the frustration she felt toward Enjolras, Éponine kept calm and asked, "You think you have me figured out, do you?"

Enjolras shrugged. "I am a perceptive person. Although I may not let my emotions control me I am quite attuned to everyone else's. One has to be if they desire to become a successful leader."

Just then Marius appeared beside Éponine. "You're here! Have you found my beloved? Do you know where she is?"

Éponine glanced at Enjolras, who was watching her with great interest. He is waiting to see what I choose to do, she thought irritably. Giving him the brightest smile she could muster, Éponine gazed up at Marius and said cheerily, "Of course I have! Would you like me to take you to her right now?"

"That would be wonderful, 'Ponine!" Marius cried jubilantly. He turned to Enjolras and stared questioningly at him as if silently asking for his permission.

If Enjolras was surprised by Éponine actions he did an excellent job hiding it, for his face remained hard and expressionless. Not making eye contact with Éponine, Enjolras waved his hand and said, "Go, Marius. It will do the revolution no good if your mind is focused on nothing but your beloved. I will see you at the next meeting."

Marius nodded, pulling Éponine out of the chair and dragging her down the stairs. Éponine dared one last glance at Enjolras as she descended, mildly surprised to find him staring back at her. It could have been misinterpretation, but Éponine could have sworn she saw disappointment cross his features for a brief second…

Enjolras watched as Pontmercy dragged the gamine down the stairs and out of the café. He sipped his coffee, staring at the chair that Éponine had vacated. It looks like I was wrong, he thought bitterly to himself. I thought she would be different from the others.

I cannot believe I agreed to this, thought Éponine. Do I enjoy torturing myself?

No, it was all that bourgeois boy's fault. If he had not angered her with his presumptuous accusations, she would not have done this in the first place. She had to prove to him that she was in love with Marius, that she would do anything for him.

Éponine made her way through the moonlit streets of Paris, Marius following closely behind her. She could hear him muttering different ways of professing his love to Cosette as if he was trying to see which one he liked best.

"You have burst like the music of angels!" said Marius. The he frowned and shook his head. "No, no… you are the light of the sun! No… I am in heaven when I am near you! Yes, I like that!"

Éponine had to fight the urge to roll her eyes at Marius's silly behavior; in the few years that she had known him, she had never seen him more excited about anything. To her, he looked like a child awakening on Christmas morning. Let's just get this over with, thought Éponine bitterly. Perhaps they will speak and discover that they cannot stand one another. Yes, surely love-at-first-sight was not possible! The odds that Marius and Cosette truly did love each other were very slim.

The journey from the café to 55 Rue Plumet was only a minute or two; it was not long before Éponine came to a halt and pointed at the beautiful mansion before her. "There, monsieur. That is her home."

Marius took a deep breath and rushed up to the gate, peering through the iron bars into the lush garden. Éponine retreated into the shadows, still close enough that she could hear him speak.

"Mademoiselle?" Marius called hesitantly. "Mademoiselle, are you in there?"

Éponine heard the sound of a door opening followed by a sharp intake of breath from Marius. "It's you," he murmured.

A soft laugh rang from the garden; Cosette appeared in Éponine's vision. She wore a white robe over an ornate nightgown, her golden hair tied in a simple braid. The girl stared at Marius with a look of wonder, opening the gate so that nothing separated them.

"Mademoiselle," Marius said when Cosette did not speak, "I hope you do not think I am being too forward with you… but the moment I saw you at the market my heart was filled with light, with love. It… it is almost as if something is over–"

"– and yet it has scarcely begun?" finished Cosette, blushing.

Marius blushed as well, leaning forward in a gentlemanly bow. "Forgive my horrid manners, mademoiselle. Allow me to introduce myself: I am Marius Pontmercy."

The young woman gazed up at him affectionately. "And my name is Cosette."

Grinning broadly, Marius looked as if his life had just begun. He took Cosette's pale hands into his own and pressed them against his chest. "I… I do not know what to say!"

Cosette laughed. "Then do not make a sound, Marius."

With a soft sigh, Marius said quietly, "Cosette, I feel as if I am dreaming."

"Oh, monsieur, I have never felt more awake than right now."

Éponine watch from the shadows, unable to take her eyes off of them. "He was never mine to lose," Éponine whispered to herself.

As a light rain began to fall from the moonlit sky, Éponine closed her eyes and waited for the feeling to come: the feeling of hopelessness, despair, jealousy, anger, or a combination thereof…

… And the feeling never came.

Instead of anger and jealousy, Éponine felt oddly at peace… almost as if a massive weight had been lifted off of her chest. She watched the two lovebirds caressing each other tenderly and she was surprised to find it did not bother her in the slightest.

Enjolras… he was right, Éponine thought in disbelief. I was never really in love with Marius after all. If I had been this would be breaking my heart! Instead I… I am genuinely… happy for them.

The two of them looked as if they were born to be with each other, joy and happiness radiating from them as they leaned in for a sweet kiss. A single tear rolled down Éponine's cheek but it was not one of sorrow; the gamine felt she regained a certain freedom… a freedom that she did not know was absent to begin with.

When Éponine thought she loved Marius, she never came to terms with reality, always living inside her head and dreaming that Marius would someday save her from her life of poverty and marry her.

Dreams are wonderful things… but there are some dreams that cannot be. Now it was if Éponine's life had just begun: she could allow herself to live her own life, one that did not evolve around Marius. Now she could focus on turning her life around instead of pretending Marius would turn it around for her.

I will start by finding a job, she thought determinedly. It will not be easy for someone like me but I promise – as God as my witness – that I will get an honest job. I will focus on separating myself from my family… and maybe, someday in the future, I will be able to find love. Real love.

The gamine smiled at Marius and blew him a kiss. "God bless you, Marius," she whispered. "I pray that your life is filled with a happiness that I have never known."

She turned around to leave when she spotted several figures approaching from the alleyway. There was about six of them, all men it looked like. Éponine's heartbeat quickened as she recognized the tall, lanky man at the front of the group.

"Papa…" she muttered darkly.

A/N: Okay, so I wanted to do something different than a lot of the other fics - I wanted Eponine to fall out of love with Marius at some point. I wanted to write about what Eponine would like without the Marius factor. Sorry if you don't like it but I wanted to see how it would turn out. If you have any questions or comments, review or PM me!

And this chapter isn't as good as I want it to be but if I waited to update a story until I thought it was perfect... there would be no story :D