Heirloom

Marriage...

It was a beautiful thing to witness the connection and honor and commitment two people give to each other. Little Duffaile Killigan never witnessed such a ceremony, but he often dreamt of it. His parents, Allan and Belle Killigan, didn't love each other all the time they were together—Allan would often yell at his mother, or hit her, and they would fight over numerous things. Duff never really saw any love between them. It was a rare thing to see Allan and Belle kiss, or hug. And when they did, it didn't seem compassionate.

Duffaile didn't think much about the facts of their relationship, but thought in a different manner. He thought of the commitment they had towards each other…no matter how angry, or mad, or sad they were with each other, they never gave up on the other, or their family, and they endured all the hardships they had. Duff admired that loyalty. He always did, for the several years growing up among his family. When Duff turned sixteen, he and his older brother William were given very special heirlooms by their father: wedding rings.

William got Belle's wedding ring to give to whomever he wanted to marry in the near future, and Duffaile was given Cathella's wedding ring. Allan, Duff and Will's father, told them it was in Belle and Cathella's wills to give their rings to the Killigan sons. Cathella wanted Duff to have hers, because even though she passed when Duff was only 6, she could tell he loved the Killigan heritage and culture. And Belle simply wanted to hand down her ring to whichever son married first, and she figured that would be the oldest, her son William.

Duff often fantasized about his wife. He had great hope for finding love one day. Part of that had to do with the fact that he lacked love and compassion in his life, except for his dear sister Carol. She was the only one who loved him in his life. Duff's mother, Belle, and his grandmother, Cathella, loved him too, but they weren't around anymore. Besides Carol, Duff wanted a woman in his life whom he could give his heart to, and who would give their heart to him in return. Sometimes he tried to imagine her face. Often he would picture a beautiful woman with blue eyes and long blonde hair, and other days he would picture her with green eyes and black hair. Many combinations entered his mind, and the possibilities killed him. He wanted to know her name, her face, her smell, her everything…his future wife, that is.

At such a young age Duff promised himself that he would treat his wife with such care and passion, unlike his father used to treat his mother. He never wanted to fight with someone he loved, and he doubted he will. Duff never fought with Carol, and he was also very passive anyway. When Duff was picked on, he just tried to ignore the hurtful words and turn the other cheek. Usually that got him smacked, but his mother taught him well to be the kind one in the family. Allan tried to influence his hate on all of his children, and he got to William very easily. But Belle got her word through to Duff and Carol, leaving them to be peaceful, innocent, polite, passive children.

Duff thought about Will and his possibility of finding a wife. He thought it was impossible for someone as crude as his brother to charm a young lady. He was completely shocked when Will started dating Mary, the Killigan children's childhood friend. Carol kept telling Duff she expected they would have a relationship—she was smart, and was always able to detect things as they came. Will and Mary were quite close when growing up, but Duff couldn't let himself believe a girl like Mary would fall for a guy like Will. Mary was beautiful and shy, quiet….William was just….a complete and utter disaster! Okay, so maybe Will had looks. He was tall, and had muscle, unlike Duff, who was rather on the short side and a tad overweight. Duff criticized his looks all too much—he would look in the mirror and disapprove of his eyes, his nose, his teeth, his hair, his body, and everything in between. Duff thought he would never attract a woman, looking as he did, but he kept trying to remind himself that the perfect woman would accept him just the way he was.

As a young boy on the search for love, Duffaile was completely lost. He didn't even know how to say 'hello' to a woman without stuttering. He was a shy boy to anyone he didn't know and to everyone he did know, but with women it was like he was just plain stupid. Carol tried to teach him, tried to help him, but it was no use. Duff watched his brother, and tried to see how he approached women, but it disgusted Duff to think he would ever act like his brother. Will used pick-up lines and flattered women in unflattering ways. The fact that Duff had an opinion about that made Will laugh. "Brer," he would say. "It don' matter what ye say te the woman…whut matters is tha' ye do everythin' ye can te get her te come home!"

William went as far as calling Duff a feminist and, eventually, a homosexual. Just because he wanted to give women respect didn't mean anything besides the fact that he was a gentleman! But in a house with William and especially Allan, who was more than disappointed by the fact that his measly son never in his life talked to a woman besides a Killigan, and, at the age of 16 was still a complete and utter virgin.

Besides his reputation with the opposite gender, Duffaile still liked to hope that one day the ring he held in his hand would be on a lovely, long finger. He hoped, no…begged that fate would bring him someone. He needed someone. He couldn't take it anymore. After 16 years of living in his dreadful, abusive home he needed love. All he had left was Carol, and if she left he….well he didn't want to even think of that. If she left, it was almost a promise that he would go insane. He needed someone to be there for him. He needed to get out of his home and start a new family and leave his past behind him. It was what he wanted and prayed for every morning, noon, and night. He had to have hope, because if he didn't, he had nothing. And if he had nothing, there was no point in suffering anymore.