Present Day: Washington, DC
"You left me all alone."
The brokenness in her voice hit Fitz like a ton of bricks. He had never intended to hurt her all those years ago. Everything had just been so damn complicated.
"Olivia, I never meant to hurt you."
"I opened up to you," she replied quietly. "I told you everything because you made me feel safe. You promised me forever and then you left me all alone."
She looked down and traced the pattern of the table with her fingertip. It had been five long years since she had seen him and he was still as handsome as ever. Just being in his presence made her heart beat in over drive. Sitting before Olivia was the man who had finally put the last brick on the wall surrounding her heart. She was a broken woman and she wasn't sure if anything would ever fix her.
"I'm sorry. I am so sorry," he said. "I was a coward. Things were so incredibly complicated. I got scared and it was easier to pretend like it didn't matter."
For the first time since she sat down Olivia looked up and into his eyes. She was met with beautiful blue eyes desperately searching her face for something. Anything.
"So it did matter," she asked him softly. Her voice was shaky and quiet, like she wasn't sure what answer she preferred.
"It absolutely mattered."
5 Years Ago: Santa Barbara, California
Fitz sat at his desk and tried to focus on the brief he was reading. Instead he found that he was thinking of Olivia. You're always thinking about Olivia, he told himself.
They became fast friends after meeting. Best friends. They discussed all of their hopes and dreams over pizza two nights after meeting. Fitz swore that from that moment on he would do whatever he had to do to keep Olivia Pope in his life. Beautiful, smart, vibrant Olivia Pope.
Fitz found he was able to confide in her about his family issues and how he hated working for his father's law firm. She told him all about her father leaving her and all the men who'd broken her heart. They were perfectly in sync. Instinctually knowing when to listen and when to cheer up. It was a connection unlike any he had felt before. Up until meeting her, he didn't believe it existed.
His phone buzzed and he knew by the way his heart skipped a beat that it had to be her. A smile spread across his lips when he saw her name light up on the screen.
Good morning, sunshine. I owe you a pool rematch. Tonight, after work?
Fitz laughed as he read her message. Olivia Pope was a pool shark if he ever met one. She looked so unassuming that most people forgot she was brilliant. Brilliant enough to trick him out of $100. He had been hoping to see her tonight. He was always hoping to see her or talk to her. But tonight was different, tonight he had to tell her something.
Deal. I need to talk to you first though. Meet me at the diner?
His phone buzzed again almost immediately and he laughed. She was also the fastest typist he knew.
That doesn't sound ominous at all. See you there.
He was nervous. That was the prevailing emotion as he walked into the diner. Olivia was, of course, early and sitting at their normal booth typing furiously. He approached slowly and slid in across from her.
"Hi," he said.
"Hi." She looked up at him and flashed her brightest smile. Fitz leaned back against the booth and took a deep breath, causing Olivia to arch an eyebrow. "What's up? You're acting weird."
"I have something to tell you, I just don't know where to start."
"Start with the truth," she replied.
Okay, here goes, he thought.
"My marriage is... cold. Dying. Dead." Olivia cocked her head to the side slightly and nodded for him to continue. "It has been circling the drain for awhile. I think it is pretty obvious that there is something special between you and I. I think about you literally all the time. I have real feelings for you. I'm hoping you feel the same. And my marriage is well, it never should have began."
"Okay," she said slowly.
"I know telling you that is low and the oldest trick in the book."
"So then why are you telling me?"
"Because I don't want you to think I am some scumbag looking for a cheap thrill. I don't want you to think I'm looking for a mistress."
"I never thought that of you."
"I know. Because for the first time in my life, someone sees me. You see me, Olivia."
"So what's the endgame?"
"I'm divorcing my wife."
"Okay.."
"And after that I want to be with you. Unless you don't want me."
"I want you," she said in a near whisper. He looked up at her, a stupid grin crossing his face as he reached out for her hand.
Fitz was pacing in circles, a habit he had apparently picked up from Olivia in the two and a half months he had known her. It seemed that everything lately was about or related to Olivia but what he had to do here and now couldn't be about her.
He sat down on his couch and waited for his wife to come home. Today was going to be the day he told her he wanted a divorce. He knew she wasn't going to take it well and he had been stalling for weeks. No more. He was done delaying his chance to be happy. While he would never make Olivia the reason for his divorce, the possibility of a future with her was ever present in his mind.
The door creaked open and he looked up to see his wife standing in the doorway. Fitz took a moment to look at her, to really take her in. She was a beautiful woman, tall and stately with the graceful air of a queen. There was a many a man out there who would trip over their own feet to get to her. There was a man out there who could love her. It just wasn't him. They had never been in love but after dating for years, marriage seemed like the next logical step. That wasn't any way to start a marriage and he realized that now. It was time that he took hold of his own happiness.
"Mellie," he started, "we need to talk."
"Let me guess," she replied as she walked over and sat down. "You're not happy."
"I'm not happy."
"Well, darling," her voice was sharp, filled with venom. "What will it take to fix that?"
"I want a divorce."
"Out of the question."
"Mellie, be reasonable here."
"I am being reasonable, Fitzgerald! Marriage isn't easy! It takes time and effort. How will it look if we get divorced? We will be a laughing stock!"
Fitz sighed and looked at her again before shaking his head. How did he get to this place?
"I... listen. I'm going to move out. I'll go stay at the condo."
"Fine. Go stay at the condo. Get whatever this is out of your system."
"So how did it go?"
Fitz sat down on the bench next to Olivia and sighed. They had made lunch plans days ago and decided to meet at the park he showed her the day after they met. Show me something you love. His mind replayed that statement often. The answer was Olivia Pope.
"She didn't take it well, Liv," he said as he stared at his hands.
Olivia looked at him and noticed he seemed tired, like he hadn't slept much in days. She wondered if he had, if he was even sleeping at all.
"I told her I was moving into the condo and she told me to 'get this out of my system.' She thinks I'm just going through a phase." Fitz leaned his head back and pushed his sunglasses on top of his head, enjoying the warm sun on his face.
"And?" She prompted him gently. It was obvious to her that he was leaving something out. His head turned slowly and they locked eyes.
"And," he sighed. "I'm worried."
"About," she prodded further.
"My wife... her reaction to this kind of thing is... I don't even have the words to explain."
"Try, Fitz."
"She's going to self destruct. Or at least threaten to. And I am worried that she will try and make you a part of this."
"How? Does she... does she know about me? We are just friends anyway."
"No. But I think she will dig and while I'm not cheating, I just... she can be mean and vindictive. She will twist this and make it about you."
"So, what do we do?" The words were weak when they left her mouth and she was looking at her hands.
"Hey, Liv. Livvie, look at me," he said softly. She slowly lifted her head and locked eyes with him. "This isn't me leaving you. I want to be with you when this is over. I don't want to give her any unnecessary ammunition. You're going home next week, right?" She nodded slowly, still keeping eye contact. "Alright. We just... we have to be careful. This isn't me leaving you. I don't think I could live a life without you. Okay?"
"Okay."
"Thank you for driving me to the airport."
"You're welcome, Livvie. I," Fitz sighed and looked over at Olivia. She was so beautiful. "I'm really going to miss you."
"I'm going to miss you too."
"Promise you'll call me when you land?"
"Is that allowed?"
"Of course it is."
"I just... I don't want to cause problems."
"You're my friend, Liv," he said. And the love of my life.
"Then why do I feel like a mistress?"
"Hey. Don't talk like that. You will never be my mistress. You are so much more than that."
"I'm a secret, Fitz," she said. Her voice was broken, quiet, missing the light. It broke his heart to see her in pain.
"Just until this is over." He reached out and stroked her cheek. "You aren't the secret. My feelings for you are. And when this is over? I'm moving to Boston and I will shout it from the rooftops."
"Really?"
"Really. Any rooftop you want."
A/N: I hope you liked Chapter 2. It was a little shorter than the last one and very dialogue heavy. Thank you for all the reviews. :) They're really sweet. Let me know what you think about Chapter 2. Chapter 3 will be posted tomorrow.