[Text] Un-bolded Square brackets indicate Boosted Gear speaking. This is not Ddraig.

Gabriel's Room

The group of six consisting of Asia, Evangel, Gabriel, Lily, Mell and Raynare were currently lazing around on the massive bed in Gabriel's room. The room itself was filled with pillows of cats and kittens of all shapes, colour and sizes. A large crystal hung from the ceiling, illuminating the room with a warm glow.

The walls were covered with a paw print motif and the floor was covered with a soft and fuzzy carpet. Overall, the room itself was very cosy and most beings cannot help but want to take a nap on that amazing bed.

Gabriel was currently lying down flat on her tummy was hugging a cat shaped body pillow. "I've sent my personal forces to the Church to check things out." She lazily mumbled out with her eyes closed and her mouth was in a w shape.

On the bed, Asia was asleep, resting her head on Raynare's thighs while the fallen angel stroked her hair periodically. Drool was spilling out of the corner of her lips but Raynare had her straw ready for moments like this.

A vibration suddenly came from the cat pillow that Gabriel was hugging. Gabriel pushed the nose of the cat and the eyes began to blink in sync with the words being spoken. "Lady Gabriel, we have identified the intruder as Diodora Asaroth. We will begin pursuit with the exorcist found at the site."

"Okay… remember to stay safe." Gabriel mumbled out before she dumped her face on the pillow and passed out from fatigue.

"Raynare, are you returning back to Japan after we get back?" Lily was rather reluctant to have her new friend leave so soon. The fallen angel shook her head which in turn, made Lily feel slightly happier.

"I can't return for a while due to some… incidents." She looked away in embarrassment while giving a cheesy smile before returning to her normal facial expression. "Sorry to be intruding on you like this. But could I stay in your Church until I can return?"

"You don't even have to ask!" Lily tapped her chest with her fist in pride. "Since you're staying, would you like me to take you for a tour around Italy?" The nun suggested to Raynare.

"I will be in your care then Lily." Raynare expressed her thanks with a bow and a tender smile. But behind that innocent façade lies a more horrid interpretation…

A miniature Raynare appeared inside Raynare's mind and spoke of her impure thoughts. Evil version of Raynare was wearing a set of leather dominatrix gear with a large black strap-on dangling from her crotch. "Ohmygosh, loli nun taking me on a date. DATE. What should I wear? Will I finally be able to see the new light? Loli! Loli! Wooooo!"

While the evil Raynare clone was chuckling to herself, an angel dressed in pure white with equally white wings appeared. The angel looked exactly like Raynare and dispensed advice that was equally as bad. "Pure girls are meant to be protected. Don't do anything to corrupt their purity. Remember, loli is love, loli is life."

Our fallen angel Raynare. The only being with a good and evil conscience that are both just as cancerous as each other.

North Pole

Issei and Ddraig took the scenic route around the mountains, heading towards their destination. After a long and treacherous journey, they have finally arrived.

The giant green and red mansion stood in front of them. A bunch of elves with ripped sleeves, tattoos and piercings were dragging some really beefed up reindeers into a giant garage.

The reindeers were each the size of a bus and had bulging muscles all over their bodies. The veins can be seen pulsating with each movement and their sides were marked with a number and the phrase "Spreading happiness, one kid at a time."

[That looks awfully familiar, I just can't put my finger on it. It's on the tip of my tongue…] Ddraig was deep in thought while Issei began to sneak into the mansion from the open window on the second floor.

Issei took a few steps back before making a running start and putting his forward foot against the exterior of the mansion, he began to run up the wall. After the third step, he realized that this idea was completely retarded as the cold formed a layer of ice on the wall which he ended up slipping on.

His body crashing against the snow, the elves that were patrolling the front turned their attention towards the noise. They took their toy muskets and aimed it towards Issei and fired a warning shot into the air.

One of the elves took a radio transceiver and spoke into it. "Boss. We got ourselves a rat." On the other end of the line, the sound of a table being slammed on could be heard. "Kill the fucker! We can't have any of the magic associations on our asses again!"

Ddraig suddenly had an epiphany. [I remember now! Santa was a dealer of magical narcotics and-] the crimson dragon suddenly paused. [He… he has APPLES!]

"Ddraig? What's goi-" Issei was cut off by the activation message given by the Boosted Gear. [Auto-pilot standby. Shifting all motor functions to admin: Ddraig.]

The sides of the gauntlet unfolded into two thrusters on the top and bottom of the arm. [Unarmoured flight mode initialized. Danger to human host, continue? Accepted. Altitude 20m and rising. 50m and rising...] the thrusters propelled Issei straight into the air at an accelerating pace with the elves below firing at his feet.

"My brain… is… going… into my… feet." Going against the air resistance caused Issei's skin to be pulled against the direction he was travelling. His face became a target for insects, a few birds and a used condom.

"Orbital!" Issei shouted, in hopes that his voice could activate the secondary armour effect of the Boosted Gear.

[User command accepted. Begin shelling process.] The green jewel on the centre of the Boosted Gear glowed to confirm the process.

From the part of the gauntlet that extends to the exposed skin of Issei's arm, the metal began to crawl up his arm up to his shoulders, chest and finally expanding across his entire body sans his arm that was armed with the sacred gear.

[First Shelling completion 20%... 40%... 55%...] The initial coating only formed a layer of draconic skin over Issei's own. The core manifested on the chest to form the artificial lungs to compensate for the immense physical power needed to utilize this form.

When the first shelling was complete, Issei was covered head to toe with the draconic skin layer and the core in the centre began to pulsate, sending the soul energy of Ddraig through the pathways linked throughout the suit.

[Second Shelling completion 10%...] The second layer hardens the soul energy to manifest itself into its original physical state which was Ddraig's skin while he was still a dragon.

Small parts of the shell protruded out of the suit and 'grew' out, forming the much needed protection for the harsher environments that were to come.

The spherical shell looked extremely crude and bulky with uneven parts poking out. These were the protective layers that would serve an important purpose in the diving process.

[Troposphere has been broken through. Height has been confirmed safe for high-speed travel, prerequisites met for initiating orbital mode.] The announcement was followed by a further increase in acceleration which caused the thrusters on the gauntlet to switch to another type of propulsion.

The power of the second propulsion was so powerful that it left a solid line of red trails behind as Issei was shot further up into the air.

[Approaching stratosphere…] Issei's entire body was currently engulfed in flames from the friction caused by going against air resistance at such insane speeds with pure oxygen from the atmosphere only accelerating the heating.

From the mansion below, the elves could only see Issei as a glowing red object headed towards space.

[Approaching mesosphere…] Issei in his armour became a blinding white as the speed and heat continued to increase. The sun could be seen across the horizon as he approached the border that separates our planet from space.

[Exceeded mesosphere into outer orbit. Orbital install complete. Orbital stage two, diving. Initialized.]

The bulky and crude coating melted away into light particles that lingered behind Issei. The form within was a giant red diamond shaped shell that had a completely smooth and reflective surface without imperfections.

Within this shell held one of the three advanced forms of the Boosted Gear known as 'Orbital C'. This form grants its user immense speed that rivals the Hyperdrive ability of Archangels.

The downside of this form is that it requires a core to be manifested to compensate the power to its human users.

Hence the travel into space to prevent enemies from capitalizing on its weakness of having a long vulnerable period while the suit is being materialized.

Although the reason for our hero going into this form was mostly to prevent himself from getting killed by Ddraig's shenanigans.

[Dragons. In space baby!] Ddraig was currently sitting next to the command console located inside the Boosted Gear and taking a sip of coffee from his 'Ophis is best sis' Mug that was given to him by said best sis.

"When we're done with this. I'm going to eat pink coloured foods for a month." Ddraig hearing this, made a face similar to that 'The Scream' painting.

[Nooo! Not the pink!] Ddraig began to suck on his wing and cuddled his own body like a panicked baby. [Is it red or white? Which is it!? Who am I? What are you? Why do we exist?!]

[Orbital drop deploying in T-minus 10… 9…] The message suddenly caused Ddraig to go back to his 'srs face' [Ahem. Forget everything you heard, it was all an illusion.]

The radar overlay on the screen inside the shell suddenly showed an object approaching at high speeds towards them. A beeping icon on the bottom of the screen indicated that a call was being made to our fantastic duo.

"Hello. Who is this?" The sound of dubstep Christmas jingles blasted out of the speakers. "Ho, Ho, Ho, Santa is here to punish the bad little fuckers!" Turning on the video feed, Issei saw a heavily armed sled heading straight for them.

The sled was customized with decals, turrets, missiles and laser sharks being pulled by giant black bodybuilder reindeers that had green fire breath, obsidian black spiked teeth and their hooves made red flames each time they galloped.

Did I also mention that the reindeers also can fire purple laser from their eyes and had solid gold chains attached to their necks that acted as reins?

"No present for the baaaaad kids!" Druglord Santa pressed a button on the side of his sled and it began to pelt the shell with piercing anti-dragon bullets.

The top of the sled folded down like a convertible which revealed an equally beefed up Santa with muscles bulging from every part of his body. His signature beard was still there luckily enough.

"Die!" Santa took out a minigun from the sled, revved it up and began firing wildly at the duo's general direction.

How Santa was breathing in space without a suit can be easily answered. He's fucking Santa, he don't care about no worthless laws of physics.

"I will never see Christmas in the same way ever again…" Turning the shell, Issei fired himself and headed into a direct collision course with Santa's sled. The bullets and lasers fired by Santa merely bounced off the shell harmlessly, not slowing it down in the slightest.

[Eat dragon lead fatfuck!] Ddraig gestured two middle fingers at the command console acting as the television.

The red projectile moved closer. Without enough time to turn the sled around, the shell tore through the reindeer and into the sled without resistance.

The reindeers exploded into a shower of blood and gore as their brains and entrails scattered and floated in the depths of space upon contact with the high velocity projectile.

Santa turned into a bloody red pulp after the shell crashed into his sled, causing it to explode into rainbows.

Holding his hand over his mouth, Issei tried not to puke at the scene unfolding before him. "These rainbows feel horrible. What the fuck are they made of?"

The screen menu popped up with the following description. [Analysis complete. Substance confirmed to be used condoms.]

Slamming his head down on the command console in anger, the entire cockpit began vibrate violently.

[Self-destruct system activated]

"Fuck my life."

This story was written for pure crack and will be updated infrequently.

And before I forget, Highschool DxD owned by Ichiei Ishibumi and [Insert legal jargon here].

Uploaded on: 6/1/2016
Last edited on: N/A