Chapter Eight: Where We Stop Nobody Knows

When I opened my eyes the room was exactly the way it was supposed to be. Tears welled in my eyes. Dean was walking toward me. I lowered my head and tried to will the tears away. But it wasn't so simple. I didn't know how it happened this time. I was supposed to be shot this time. I was supposed to be the one to die. If that was the way to end this I would do the self-sacrificing thing and just end it. I couldn't take it anymore. Dean stepped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. I felt his lips against my neck, sending shivers through my body. I couldn't fight the tears. I put my hand over my face, turning in his arms. I wrapped my arms around him, crying into his shoulder. He embraced me, gently rubbing my back. When I got some control back I rested my cheek against his shoulder. I took a deep breath, trying to put my façade back in place. As I calmed down I noticed Nathan standing across the room. He was staring at me. A small grin crossing his face. The wheels in my head were turning. Something was off. I let go of Dean, walking toward the boy. I was only halfway there when he disappeared from my site. I scanned the room but he was nowhere in sight. Frowning, I turned to see Dean watching me cautiously.

"Is everything okay?" He asked.

"No, far from it." I replied and moved past him.

I spent the majority of the night looking for Nathan but he seemed to have disappeared altogether. Making it that much more suspicious. A phrase was in my head but I couldn't remember why it was important.

"Just desserts." I frowned as I tried to remember why it sounded familiar.

"What are you talking about?" Dean asked as he continued to follow me around the room.

"Just desserts." I said facing him. "Why does that sound familiar? I can't remember."

"Just desserts?" He said frowning.

"Yes, it's connected to something supernatural. I know it is. I just can't think of what." I replied.

"Um…it's something people say about Tricksters." He told me.

"Yes!" I said feeling exceptionally relieved. "Thank you!" I said kissing him before running across the room.

Nathan was sitting with Beth just a few tables down. I rushed toward them, grabbing the boy, pulling him from his seat. Beth immediately freaked out at me as I held the boy in the air.

"I know what you are!" I yelled at him. He just grinned as his mother tried pulling him from my arms. "No!" I yelled at her. "This isn't your son!"

"What are you talking about?" Beth yelled.

"Make it stop!" I yelled shaking the boy. "Make the night end!"

"Stop it!" Dean said as he pried my fingers off of the boy. "Evy, stop it! Let him go!"

I let go of the kid and started to pace. "You don't get it!" I yelled at Dean. "He's a Trickster!"

"Just stop it, okay?" Dean frowned at me.

"No!" I yelled as tears started to stream. I turned and ran. I found a corner at the far side of the room and slid down the wall. I brought my knees up against me as I rocked back and forth. "He needs to make it stop. This has to stop. I need it to stop." I whispered to myself.

"Evy, what's going on?" Dean said standing in front of me, his hands on his hips.

"That little boy is a Trickster." I told him. "I've been reliving this night over and over again."

"Like déjà vu?" Dean frowned.

"No, Dean." I frowned as I wiped the tears off my cheeks. "Every night we're here and every night you die. I can't take it anymore." I said starting to rock again, crying as I put my hands over my head.

"Hey, it's going to be all right." He said sitting next to me.

I shook my head. Nothing about this was all right. He sighed and pulled me against him. Resting my head against his chest I continued to cry. I was just getting control of myself when the doors burst open and the men filed through. I sighed and watched them moved through.

"That's Jasper Hughes. He's the leader of all this. He's the ex-husband of Bethany and the father to Nathan. That's Marcel, Jasper's right hand man." I told Dean as I pointed them out. "They're here to get rich and grab the kid and his mom. Not sure why the Trickster would want to be the kid but whatever. That damn kid is the Trickster. I don't know if he has been the whole time but he is now. If the real Nathan is around here somewhere I don't know where. Unless both are wandering around here somewhere."

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"I'm beyond sure. He was just standing there grinning at me. And now that's it's started you'll be dead soon. You never make it more than a few hours. Something always happens."

"It'll be okay. I'm not going anywhere." He told me.

"You've said that before." I frowned at him, my tone defeated. "And you still die every time. I even tried killing myself." I admitted, stray tears falling down my cheeks.

"What? Don't even think that." Dean frowned heavily at me.

"I'm sorry. But what would you do if you saw me die every night?" I asked him.

"I guess the thought would cross my mind." He replied.

"Exactly." I replied.

"Let's just sit here for the rest of the night. It'll be all right." He told me with a reassuring smile.

"It's not that easy. They're going to come around demanding money and jewelry. Last time they asked for my necklace. I wouldn't give it to him. I've confronted Jasper about his motives but in the end I'm always in trouble and you always try and get me out of it. Then you die." I explained as tears filled my eyes.

"Just give him the necklace if they ask for it." Dean told him.

"No, Dean." I frowned at him. "This is from you and, whether it actually holds any real power or not, I feel like it protects me. I need to get you one."

"It's not worth your life. Maybe if you give it to him he'll leave us alone and we can survive the night." He told me.

"It's not just the necklace. Bethany is in trouble too. So is Nathan if the real one is around." I stated.

"We just need to lay low. We'll make it through this." He said kissing my forehead.

"Maybe." I said softly.

We were quiet as we waited. Soon someone stepped in front of us. We looked up and Dean shot to his feet.

"What is it?" I asked as I stood.

"You were right." He told me, his eyes on the man.

"Hi, Dean." The Trickster grinned at him. "Evy." He said and nodded at me.

"Why are you doing this?" I asked as I lunged at him. Dean held me back. "Please, make it stop." I told him with wet eyes.

"I don't think you're learning anything." He smiled.

"What?" I frowned at him. "What is it I'm supposed to be learning? Why do you keep killing him?"

"Maybe this doesn't have anything to with Dean." He smiled before walking away, glancing over his shoulder at us.

Dean and I looked at each other, frowning. We sat back down. I put my head in my hands, trying to think of every possible meaning of what he said.

"What did he mean?" Dean asked.

"I don't know." I frowned, shaking my head.

The more I thought about the more it appeared that he could only have meant one thing. I rested my head on Dean's shoulder, slipping my hand into his. He kissed me gently as we continued to wait. My mind kept going over his words. If it wasn't about killing Dean then why did he insist on doing it? What did I have to do with it? What lesson did he want us to learn? It took only a few minutes for the light bulb to go on. I looked at Dean. His eyes met mine. I smiled sweetly, kissing him gently, letting it linger. We held each other as we watched everything go down. I knew what I had to do. Even if it didn't work, I had to try.

It didn't take long before the men came around looking for anything that would fetch a price. We were nearly the last to be seen. It was the same guy from before. He asked for my necklace. I told him to fuck off. It, of course, didn't sit well and we were soon dragged from our spot. We were forced into a group of the others that tried to resist. Some were bleeding mildly but overall everyone seemed to be all right.

"Why didn't you just give it to him?" Dean scolded quietly.

"Because." I told him.

"Evy, we can't just do nothing." He replied. "Especially if people are going to get hurt."

"Don't do anything." I snapped at him. He frowned and I could see him looking around for something to use. I took a deep breath and stood, "Excuse me?"

"Evy…" Dean said reaching for me.

I quickly moved out of his reach. "Marcel, can I have a word?" I asked him.

"What?" He frowned at me.

"I was just wondering if you could do me a favor." I replied. He just frowned at me with an angry expression. "Could you tie him to his chair?" I asked pointing at Dean. Marcel continued to look at me. "Seriously, if you want this whole thing to go smoothly you want him tied to a chair." He continued to look at me before nodding at the man behind him.

"Evy, what are you doing?" Dean asked as his arms were forced behind his back.

"I'm saving you." I smiled my voice breaking.

"Don't do this. Baby, please, don't do this." He pleaded as he fought his bindings.

"I have to." I told him as tears started to fall.

"Evy, I'm not losing you again." He said leaning toward me, his eyes growing wet.

I went to him, leaning down, taking his head in my hands. "You'll never lose me. I'm always with you." I told him softly before kissing him deeply.

"Please." He whispered. "Please, don't do this."

"I love you." I smiled before moving my hand to my knife.

"Don't." Dean said shaking his head.

"It'll be okay." I told him as reassuringly as I could.

He shook his head as I stepped back. It took only a second for me to spin around, slashing Marcel across the throat. Others lunged at me. I spun and slashed an abdomen before punching another as his face came closer to mine. I turned and came face to face with Jasper. I turned the knife so it was against my forearm. He had a wicked grin on his face. It would take little to provoke him. I swung my arm up and then the gun went off. My stomach lurched as the bullet entered it. The knife dropped from my hand. My own breathing filled my ears. I'd been shot before but this was different. This felt different. Dean's voice brought me back from the initial shock. I turned and looked at him. Shock was written all over his face. I looked down. My hand was over the wound but blood was running freely from it. I moved my hand, the blood pooling in my open palm, warm and flowing.

"Evy…" He said barely above a whisper.

"I'm okay." I told him taking a step toward him. My legs wouldn't support my weight. I fell to the floor at his feet.

"Oh God…Evy." Dean said leaning down toward me.

"I'm okay." I repeated as I put my hand on his leg. "It doesn't even hurt."

"Please don't leave me." He whispered to me.

"It's gonna be okay." I told him weakly.

"I love you." He whispered.

I could hear the tears in his voice. "I love you too." I told him as I closed my eyes. His whispering voice was the last thing I heard.

When I opened my eyes a blue sky was above me. I sat up, the yellow flowers coming up nearly to my shoulders. They'd grown a bit. Barking filled my ears and Cooper came bounding into view. I stood and embraced my dog. A moment later Mary and John came running into the field. I smiled and ran toward them, throwing my arms around John's neck.

"You made it." I smiled.

"What are you doing here?" He frowned at me.

"Just give me two seconds to bask in your presence." I told him.

He smiled and hugged me tighter. "I've missed you." He said sweetly.

"Not as much as I've missed you." I grinned. "Mary." I said going to his wife.

"Evy." She smiled hugging me tightly.

"I am so happy to see you guys." I said just looking at them.

"Okay, tell us what happened." John said ruining my giddiness.

I sighed and pulled gently on Cooper's ear. "A Trickster put a time loop on me. I was reliving the same night over and over again. Only every night Dean was shot. Every night he died." I told them. Both his parents were looking at me with sad expressions. "Once I figured it out, he confronted us. He told me that I wasn't learning anything. When I asked him why he kept killing Dean he told me that it might not have anything to do with Dean. So in order to end the loop, I get to be here." I finished.

"You don't seem very upset about this." John frowned at me.

"What's there to be upset about?" I shrugged. "Dean is alive and I honestly don't think I'll be staying very long." I told him.

"What?" John frowned.

I just rolled my eyes and ran toward my house. In a side room was all my supernatural information. Since it was heaven and mine I knew exactly where the information I wanted was. I paged through the book until I found the information on Tricksters. It wasn't anything new but I had to read through it anyway. John started to page through things as well, bringing back tons of memories.

"I think he can bring me back. If he turns back time I'll be alive again." I told them as I glanced over a few pages. "He'll have to. Dean won't let me stay. He'll figure something out."

"Okay." John said but was, clearly, still confused.

"In the end I think time will be reset to when it all started. I should return to the ball and both of us will survive the night. Everything will go back on track." I tried explaining.

"What if this is the track?" John asked. "What if you're dead again? The real kind of dead."

"That would really suck." I told him. "Seeing Dean's face when I died. It was unbearable. It's not fair. But if this goes the way I think it will then he shouldn't remember what happened. Hopefully I won't either."

"Can we just go sit for a minute? Wrap our heads around all of this." Mary suggested.

"Of course." I smiled and we all went into the living room.

We sat down, only I was so fidgety that I stood and paced in front of them. I had to be right. Neither Dean nor Sam would allow the Trickster to get away with this. They would make him right time. They wouldn't let me stay dead and Sam would never let Dean stay dead. Something would be done. I would be with them again. I would live again.

"Honey, could you please sit for just a moment?" Mary asked me kindly.

"I can't. I –" I said and looked at her. "I just can't." I said and crossed my arms.

"Evy." John said and gave me a stern look.

I looked back, frowning before sinking down into my leather armchair. "What's going on down there?" I asked rhetorically.

"Just calm down." John frowned at me.

"Shut up." I frowned back at him. "I am a bit stressed at the moment. Just let me go a little crazy for a minute. I'm dead, my fiancé and future brother-in-law are in probable danger, and I am so frickin tired of this shit." I said and put my head in my hands.

"We know sweetie." Mary said comfortingly. "But you wouldn't have been given this life if you weren't meant for it."

I smiled at her. "Sometimes I think that. Then there are times I think the universe enjoys watching me suffer."

"It probably does." John grinned at me.

I grinned back, shaking my head at him. "I kinda love you, you know that?"

"Love you too." He winked.

"If you don't mind me asking, how were you brought back?" Mary asked gently.

"A deal was made with a crossroads demon." I told her.

"Who?" John frowned as Mary put her hand on his knee.

"Don't worry. Both your boys are safe." I told them. I watched them relax. I wasn't about to tell them about Dean. It wasn't fair and they couldn't do anything about it. "Riley Newberry is the one who did it. He was a friend of mine. Then he betrayed me and the boys. He threw his lot in with yellow-eyes. He's our enemy now but some part of him felt guilty about my death. He brought me back. Only it came with a price. He made me forget who I was. I was alive two months before I accidentally ran into the boys. Scared the crap out of me. Dean kept calling me 'baby' and told me I knew them. I didn't know them. I couldn't remember. But you know your boys. They're very persistent." I told them and smiled. "So after spending time with them something was triggered. I remembered who I was. And who Riley was. Sam made me let him go but he'll get what's coming to him. If I ever see him again I don't think I'll be able to help myself." I finished, feeling the distant look coming to my eyes.

"It should make you happy to know that he'll be dead in 10 years if you don't get to him first." John smiled.

I gave him a small smile. "Yeah, but to think of the damage he could do before then isn't very reassuring."

They just looked at me. Time seemed to stand still. This was anything but unusual. I knew what heaven was like. I knew that time didn't mean anything. This was agonizing. I was still convinced that I wasn't going to be staying here. It was unbelievable to think that Dean and Sam would let me stay here. Not like this. John, Mary, and I talked to break the silence but it was hard to focus. All I could think of was Dean and what was happening in the land of the living. I sat on the couch, stroking Cooper as he draped himself across my lap.

"...in the end I've come to the conclusion that skiing is not for me." I told him. They grinned at me. Can't pass up an opportunity to laugh at my clumsiness. "Dean's been fantastic though, despite it all. He's –" I stopped as something familiar pulled at me. The smile on my face faltered before a deep frown set in. "Not good."

John and Mary followed me as I ran out into the field. Dean was standing there, smiling at me. Then he was gone. I frowned as the feeling faded. Only a few minutes later he appeared again. He lingered momentarily before he disappeared again. It continued over and over again. He appeared and then disappeared in different areas of the field. John and Mary watched as I ran around trying to find Dean. Every time he appeared I never made it to him before he disappeared again.

"What the hell!" I screamed falling to my knees. "What's going on?" I asked myself as tears filled my eyes.

"Evy…" John said putting his hand on my shoulder.

"Sam." I said and looked at them. "The Trickster is playing with Sam." I said and stood. "He keeps killing Dean. He keeps doing it." I said as I started to pace. "But why? What are we supposed to learn?"

Anger started to boil in my veins. Dean appeared again. He was only a few feet from me this time. I stood and faced him. A second later he was gone. It started again. He appeared and disappeared again. Over and over and over. I kept moving to find him but I gave up. There was no catching him. I stopped and watched as he came and went in all areas of the field.

"Stop it." I said as I watched, turning in a circle. "Stop it! Stop! Stop! STOP!" I yelled. I fell to my knees, throwing my head back, screaming as loud as I could. In the same moment the sky went dark, thunder and lightning erupting. The sky opened up and a heavy downpour came crashing down on us. Tears came to my eyes. I hung my head. "Please, stop." I said closing my eyes.

"Evy…"

Dean's voice caught my ears. "Dean…" I said looking up at him. He didn't disappear. I rushed to him, throwing my arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. "I love you. I love you so much." I told him.

"I love you too." He said and kissed me again.

"What happened?" I asked him.

"I was shot." He told me.

"What?" I frowned.

"The Trickster caught up with us again. The same game only this time he played it with Sam. We thought we had ended it. But I was shot in the parking lot of the motel." He explained.

"How are you here?" I asked him. "Since you died before the year mark does that mean you won't go to Hell?"

"Maybe the devil doesn't know I'm here yet." He replied.

"Dean…" I said as tears filled my eyes.

"Hey, it's okay." He told me with his half smile. "I'll always come for you."

I gave a short laugh before wrapping my arms around his neck, kissing him passionately. "Stay with me." I whispered to him.

"I'm always with you. No matter what happens." He told me, his fingers touching the pentagram around my neck. "I love you."

"I love you." I said and kissed him gently. Then my skin burned as he burst into flame, disappearing from the field. "No. No! NO!" I screamed falling to my knees again.

My chest heaved with the effort of the sobs breaking from my throat. I sobbed, rocking back and forth as I thought of Dean being in Hell. I felt hands on my shoulders but I shrank away from them. I didn't want to be comforted. I didn't want to feel better. I had tried to save him. But he ended up in Hell anyway. I cried so hard for so long that I was exhausted. I fell to the side, curling myself into the fetal position. The tears were still streaming as rain continued to pour down. Cooper laid next to me, his head next to mine. He licked my forehead, whining, but stayed with me. I let myself fall asleep, waking only when Cooper lifted his head. I heard footsteps before arms were underneath me. I looked at John as he cradled me against his chest. He placed a kiss on my forehead before turning toward the house. He carried me up to my room, laying me on the big bed. Cooper jumped up next to me, licking John's hand before he left the room. I put my arm around my dog and buried my face in the fur of his neck. I laid there for quite some time. When I finally got up I moved to the armchair downstairs, staring outside into the field. I didn't say anything to anyone, though both John and Mary had stayed at the house. I was miserable. I didn't know what to do anymore. But it seemed like I might be here longer than I thought. It wasn't something I had prepared myself for. I didn't want to be dead again. I didn't want Dean in Hell. But what was I supposed to do? What's done was done. Only the Trickster could change our fates now.

Time went on and I remained in the armchair. The rain continued outside and I couldn't remember the last time I blinked. Every time I closed my eyes, no matter how long, Dean's body in flames was all I could see. John and Mary tried to talk to me, to break me out of the trance I was in but it was no use. It didn't matter anyway. There was no swaying my frame of mind. Cooper remained at my side but even he couldn't get me to look at him. Remaining silent, tears fell down my cheeks. It seemed like a permanent gully ran down them. Footsteps came behind me and John pulled up a chair.

"Are you going to say anything?" He asked me.

"What do you want me to say?" I asked shaking my head at him, though my voice raspy and thick with emotion. Tears fell and I wiped them away as I looked back out the window.

"Tell me what you're thinking." He said sadly.

"You know what I'm thinking." I told him. "You don't have to ask that. You already know."

"But you need to say it." He replied.

"I don't want to say it." I said as I started to breakdown again. "I don't want to think it. It's not supposed to end like this. I'm not supposed to be here!" I said and kicked the nearby end table as I got to my feet. "Why do I have to die? Why does Dean have to be in Hell? Why can't we just live our lives? Why, John, why?" I yelled at him before putting my fingers on my forehead. "What am I supposed to do, John?" I said looking at him.

"Come here." John said pulling me against him.

He held me tight as he gently caressed my back. I didn't know what to do. I could only cry. John put his hand on my head, kissing the top of it. I turned my face into him and cried harder. I couldn't stop. He led me to the couch. Sitting down he draped me across his lap. I hugged his knee as I sobbed. He gently ran his fingers through my hair. I wished I could say it was comforting me. I wished he was doing something but it just hurt so bad. It hurt to think of Dean in Hell. It hurt to think that I was going to stay dead. It just hurt.

"It's going to be okay." John whispered softly. I shook my head at him. "It'll get better. Dean will be okay. If I can get out of Hell so can he. And when he does, he'll come right here to you."

I sat up and looked at him. "It's not that simple, John." I told him with red eyes. "Dean's in Hell. I'm dead again. How the hell is this going to be okay?"

"This place will fix it." He said with a small smile. "You can't stay sad here."

"I can and I will." I told him and moved away from him.

"Evy, please." He said sadly. "You need to stop. You can't stay like this. It's not healthy."

"I'm dead!" I yelled at him. "I am dead! I don't need to be healthy! This is the way it's going to be for the rest of eternity! This house, this place, this….dog!" I said and looked at Cooper. He whined and lay at my feet. I sighed and dropped to the floor, pulling him up into my arms. "I'm sorry." I cried into him. "I'm sorry." He whined again and licked my arm. I nodded and let him go. He looked at me before licking my cheek. "Okay." I said looking at him. "Okay. Let's go." His tail thumped on the ground and he ran from the room.

"The rain stopped." Mary said from the doorway.

"Yeah." I said and followed my dog.

The sun had yet to be seen but the rain had stopped. I threw the ball for Cooper until neither of us could play anymore. When he was tired I went to the elm tree swing. The sun set and the clouds receded, letting stars litter the sky. I watched them and it was surprising at how relaxed they made me feel. The stars had more impact on me then my parents inside or my dog next to me. There was something about them. I looked at Cooper who had rolled onto his back. He looked at me, his lips falling back making his teeth show and his eyes looked all big. I couldn't help but laugh at him. I laughed harder than I had in a while. Cooper's tail wagged and he sneezed as his sinuses backed up. I laughed even harder, tears running from the corners of my eyes. His tail wagged harder and he rolled over, licking my face. I hugged him before sitting up. He sat next to me, looking at me with his mouth open, tongue lolling out. I smiled and scratched his neck. Once again absorbing myself in the stars, I jumped at the sound of John's voice. Looking over I saw both him and Mary walking towards me.

"Hey." John smiled sweetly.

"Hey." I smiled as he kissed my forehead.

"Can we sit?" He asked.

"Of course." I said and moved to the side. I watched as John and Mary sat across from me. Both looked a little uneasy. "It's okay. I'm okay." I told them.

"You seem better." John stated.

"It's the stars." I smiled and looked up at them.

"They're beautiful." Mary smiled at me.

I looked at them, both looking worried but not all at the same time. "I'm sorry you guys." I told them with a small smile. "It's just been a lot to take in. I was here and then I was alive again. Dean and I were on track. We were happy. But it's like we're being punished for being too happy. Like the universe likes watching us suffer. I'm here and Dean's in Hell. It's just too much." I blurted out.

"You're not being punished." Mary said moving forward taking my hands in hers. "Things happen. Sometimes we have no control over it. You did what you thought was best. You saved Dean. You saved him. You couldn't have known that the Trickster was going to come back again."

"But he did and I'm still dead. Now he's dead and there is nothing I can do about it. Where is Sam? He is going to be a mess without his brother. Oh God!" I said standing up. I started to pace. "I've been so closed minded. I've been thinking so much about Dean that I haven't been thinking about Sam. Oh my God! Sammy!" I said and started to cry again. "He's all alone. He doesn't have anyone. He's going to be a mess. Sam. Sammy."

"Evy." John said standing. He took my arms and forced me to look at him. "Sam is going to be fine. He's tough and he's still got Bobby." He told me.

"It's not going to matter." I told him. "Sam isn't going to go to Bobby. Bobby is going to try and be there for him but Sam isn't going to let him."

"How do you know that?" John asked.

"Because I know Sam." I replied. "I know him inside and out and I know he's going to be a mess. He's going to turn hard. He's not going to be Sam anymore."

"He'll be okay." Mary smiled gently.

"No, he won't." I said and sat down again.

My head dropped and I shut my eyes. Sam was in trouble. He needed his brother. Even if I were alive he would still need his brother. Mary sat in front of me. She pushed my hair behind my ear.

"Sweetie, Sammy is going to be fine. He's strong and he's smart. He'll find the Trickster and fix this if he can." She told me gently.

"But how long will that take?" I asked and wiped the tears away. "He's alone."

She played with my hair gently. "John." I heard her whisper.

I felt him sit behind me, his arms moving around my shoulders. He kissed my shoulder before sighing into my ear. "Honey, I'm sorry that all this is happening. But it'll work out in the end. You can't blame yourself for this. Sometimes bad things happen and there's nothing you can do about it."

"I hate feeling like this." I told him.

"I know. It'll get better." He replied.

"When?" I frowned at him.

He kissed my cheek and turned me toward him. "It's getting better all the time. Don't worry about him. There's nothing you can do about it now. He'll be able to fend for himself. You know he can take care of himself."

"I know he can." I replied. "I just worry about him."

"We do too, but we have no sway on the living anymore." He stated.

"Okay." I told him nodding. I closed my eyes and for a moment I felt an overwhelming feeling of pain and anger. I put my hand to my chest, knowing who it was. I was concentrating on him now and now I could feel him. I took it in, not saying anything. "You're right." I said and smiled at John. "He'll be okay." John smiled and nodded, kissing my forehead. "I love you, you know that right? I love both of you."

"We know." Mary said hugging me from behind. John nodded and put his arms around me too. "We love you too." I smiled and relaxed into them, pulling gently on Cooper's ear as he placed his muzzle in my lap.

Just as I was starting to feel better everything went black. I opened my eyes and I was once again in the ballroom. My breathing quickened as I looked at myself. I was in my dress; everyone from that night was there. I was alive again. I turned and Dean was walking toward me. Bursting into tears I rushed to him, throwing my arms around his neck.

"What's wrong?" Dean said pulling me away from him.

"Nothing." I smiled and kissed him passionately and repeatedly. I stopped only when my phone rang. I answered it quickly, "Sam."

"Is he…?"

"Yes."

"Does he…?"

"No."

"I'm on my way to you."

"Okay." I said and hung up the phone.

"What was that about?" Dean frowned at me.

"Do you remember the Trickster?" I asked him.

"What? What Trickster?" He said looking around.

"Let's get out of here." I said grabbing his hand.

My heart was pounding the whole way to the door. I slowed momentarily as we neared it. I pushed on it and when it gave way to the hall I pulled Dean through before booking it to the room. I shoved him through it and locked the door behind us.

"What is going on?" Dean asked me.

"Nothing. Sam's on his way here." I told him.

"Why?" Dean asked.

"Because he misses us. He can come if he wants." I frowned.

"This was supposed to be our time." He told me slightly defensively.

"Baby…" I said going to him, putting my hands on his chest. I sighed and kissed him. "Let's sit and talk a little."

I sat him down and told him everything that happened. He didn't remember anything. I remembered everything down to the smell of blood in the air, but Dean was lucky enough to have no recollection of what happened before or after my death…and his. Sam came only a short while after I was done. When I opened the door he was looking rather upset.

"Hi." He smiled sadly. I just smiled back before opening the door wider. Dean was standing there with a small smile on his face. "Dean…" Sam said before rushing to his brother, hugging him tightly. I walked to them, putting my arms around both of them.

"I love you guys." I said as I hugged them.

"I love you too." They both said in unison.

Dean went to shower and change, leaving Sam and me alone. We sat down on the couch, both feeling happy but depressed all at the same time.

"What happened, Sam? While we were gone." I asked him. "You were in so much pain."

"How do you know?" Sam frowned.

"I felt you. Just before time reset. You were so angry, in so much pain."

"I was alone. What did you expect?" He frowned.

"I'm sorry, Sammy. But you remember everything?" I asked him.

"Everything." He nodded. "You?"

"Everything." I replied. "I don't want to remember."

"Me neither." He said and pulled me into a hug.