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Chapter Eleven: Invitation
When I returned from my run—a sweaty exhausted mess—I met Jacob, scowling at me as he sorted the mail.
"You're working yourself to death," he said, his words dripping with disapproval.
"Excuse me?" It was none of his concern what I did. I was a grown woman and how I ran my life was my decision.
"You've been going in to work early, coming home late, running longer and longer every day...it's taking its toll."
"It's none of your business," I snapped.
"Maybe not, but I'm not just going to sit here and watch you wear yourself down without sayin' something."
"Well I wish you would keep your thoughts to yourself. I'm a big girl, I have a busy work schedule, and I like to run. I hardly see how that's anything to be concerned over."
Jacob looked at me with concern and disapproval. "What about the men you bring home?"
"What about them?" I questioned, my tone harsh. "May I remind you it isn't your place to do anything but make sure that this building is safe. That doesn't include snarking at me about my work life or my private life."
His face went white and I grabbed for his arm when he swayed.
"Jacob, are you all right?" I asked, our argument completely forgotten.
"Just feeling a little lightheaded. Let me sit down." I helped him to his desk and passed him a water bottle that was sitting on the desk beside him. He sank into the chair with a relieved grunt and took a sip of the water before placing it back down beside me.
"Chest pain? Shortness of breath?" I asked, worried that he was having a heart attack.
He shook his head and slowly his color returned to normal. "Just too much shouting for an old man. You should be nicer to me," he said grumpily.
I laughed, glad his typical demeanor had returned. "It wouldn't hurt for you to be nicer to me, too," I reminded him. "Can I get you anything, more water, or something to eat?
"Nah, I'm fine. Emily sent me a good lunch and when Seth comes in I'll go eat it," he reassured me.
"All right. Any mail for me?"
I saw an envelope, half-covered by a magazine and picked it up, surprised to see my name on it. The elegant script reminded me of the note . . . Edward had sent this to me.
"Did I get this today?" I asked, inspecting it more closely. Realizing there was no stamp, I said, "Wait, this wasn't mailed. Did he drop it off?"
Jacob gave me an innocent look. "Did who drop what off?"
"Jacob, don't play around. Did Edward drop off this letter for me," I said annoyed.
"One of your men did—the tall one with the dreadful hair."
"Edward," I said, slipping my finger under the flap and opening it. I liked Edward's hair, but it didn't surprise me that Jacob thought it was dreadful. I pulled out a card and flipped it open.
Bella,
You haven't responded to my previous messages, but I had to try one last time. Our second night was as memorable as the first, although I preferred waking up to you. Even if it means getting paperweights thrown at me.
I can't stop thinking about you. Please call me.
-Edward
His business card was tucked inside and I examined it before it occurred to me what he wrote. I let my hand fall to my side and I glared at Jacob.
"Is there something you neglected to tell me?" I asked sternly.
"Of course not. I... I wouldn't hide anything from you," he protested, looking guilty.
"You're lying. Did Edward send me any more notes?"
"Uhh..." He shifted awkwardly in his chair.
"Jacob Black, you ought to be ashamed of yourself, withholding mail from a tenant." I shook my head at him. "I bet Seth would be horrified."
"Now don't you go bringing him into this," he grumbled and opened his desk, pulling out another letter and a phone message slip.
"Which of these came first?" I asked.
"The phone call."
I examined the message slip; it merely said that an Edward Cullen had called for me earlier in the week and had asked me to call him back. There was a hastily scrawled phone number at the bottom.
I looked at the letter next, it had been sent several days after the phone message.
Bella,
I don't know if you got the first message I sent you. Your friend at the desk seemed less than thrilled to see me.
I am sorry if I pushed you the other night. I woke up and you were gone. I know whatever is going on your life is none of my business, but I only want to ease your pain, not add to it. My apologies if something I said or did made you uncomfortable.
Please call me; I would like to see you again.
-Edward
Another of his business cards was enclosed and I clutched it in my hand before frowning at Jacob.
"I can't believe you kept this from me." I glared at him.
Jacob apologized sheepishly and I sighed. "Are you sure you're all right?"
"I'm fine. Run along now."
I touched his shoulder and made my way up to my apartment. I didn't know how I felt about Edward's messages now that I realized he had tried to get in touch with me last week, but I was annoyed that Jacob hadn't given them to me. I had actually been somewhat surprised by the lack of contact from Edward, but I figured he had given up on me after my late night departure.
I showered, still thinking about him and wondering if I should call him at least to apologize. I had been rude in not responding, even if it hadn't been my fault.
I tried to put it from my mind while I dove into case files and I spent the rest of the day in a blur of legal briefs and strategy for an upcoming case. When I resurfaced, I was surprised to find that it was dark out and I realized I hadn't eaten all day. I was starving.
I ordered in and ate, while making final notations to the work I had done earlier and went to bed without another thought of Edward again that night.
The following morning, I slipped into my usual routine and was thoroughly engrossed in my work when Bree walked in to my office.
"Morning, Bella." She smiled at me.
"Morning, Bree." She was the receptionist at the front of the office and had been working for us for about eight months. She was young, only about twenty-two, and a pretty, natural blonde. She was always polite and friendly, and seemed to do her job well, so I was happy to have her around. I idly wondered if I could trade her for my assistant, Lauren, at least until Gianna was back.
"I have a question for you."
"Oh?" I glanced up at her.
"Will you be coming on Sunday?"
"Coming to what?" I asked, semi-distracted, trying to find a file in the pile on my desk.
"To an office barbecue at the park. I'm trying to get a head count for Sue so she can give it to the caterer."
"Oh yes, that's right." I continued to dig around, searching through papers, stumbling across Edward's card in the process. "I suppose it is that time of year, isn't it?" She waited patiently while I stared at her blankly. "I'm sorry, Bree. Yes, I will be there."
"Will you be bringing someone?"
"Bringing someone?"
"For your plus-one."
"Oh. No, I don't think so." I paused to think a moment, still clutching Edward's card in my hand. I hadn't given the yearly barbecue much thought since Riley and I had gone together in years prior. The thought that he wouldn't be with me this year stung a little. Unfortunately, it wasn't really a function I could gracefully get out of. But I wasn't sure I could bear to go alone.
"Actually, on second thought, yes, I will be bringing someone."
Bree raised a brow at me. "Two then. Thank you, Bella."
"Sorry, I'm feeling a bit scattered this morning," I apologize. She waved it off before stepping out of the office.
"Who to invite though?" I hadn't really met anyone lately. Goodness knows James was out of the running now, I wouldn't be calling him again. "I could invite Edward," I mused, startled by the bit of excitement that I got just by thinking of him. I did owe him an apology. Lauren's voice coming in over the phone announcing I had a call snapped me out of my musings. As I took the call, I jotted down a reminder to call Edward after lunch. "No big deal, it was just a casual escort to a company function. Nothing at all to worry about."
Work quickly consumed me and I didn't think about calling Edward again until after I ate lunch.
In my search for a case number, I noticed the note about calling Edward and set aside my work for a moment. "I could call him now," I thought. I retrieved his card from where I had tucked it into my planner and studied it, noticing that his middle initial was A. I idly wondered what it stood for. I picked up the phone and dialed his number, nervously tapping my pen on my desk while waiting for him to pick up.
A slightly breathless voice answered, "Edward Cullen, Special Exhibits and Collections, how may I help you?"
"Edward?"
"Yes."
"Uh, this is Isabella. Um, Bella Swan." Good lord, what had happened to the cool and collected lawyer? I sounded like a thirteen year old.
"Bella." His voice registered his shock.
"I need to apologize."
"All right," he said cautiously.
"I want to apologize for leaving the other night. I needed to get home; I had to get into work early the next day," I fibbed.
"You work on the weekends?"
"Well yes, I mean no, uh, I worked from home."
"Oh... Well, it would have been nice if you'd woken me, but I understand." We both were silent for a moment. "Is there anything else you wanted to say?" he asked, finally.
"Uh, yes. I wanted to say I was sorry as well for not responding to your messages. It appears my doorman had some trouble remembering to get them to me. I didn't get them until yesterday."
"Oh, I did wonder. He's a bit of an odd old man, isn't he?"
"Yes, but he keeps an eye out for me, so I can't stay too mad at him," I explained. "Anyway, I had planned to call you to apologize, but work came up and I had another reason to call. Do you have plans for this Sunday?"
"I warned you that you wouldn't be able to get enough of me," he said smugly.
I chuckled, half-amused and half-annoyed by his cocky statement.
"No, I don't have any plans that I can think of off the top of my head," he continued. "Why?"
"Well, I wanted to invite you to a barbecue. It's an annual thing we do for the employees and their families, and I of course need to be there. I was wondering if you'd consider being my plus-one."
"Well what are we talking here, all day, part-day; will I be required to hold your hand?" He sounded slightly irritated and I winced knowing I deserved that.
"Just part of the day, afternoon and early evening. And I believe the hand-holding is optional."
He laughed slightly, and said, "I suppose I can handle that."
"Great."
"Sure. Just tell me when and where."
"Three o'clock, Golden Gate Park. Dress casually."
"Do you want to meet there or would you like me to pick you up?"
"It can be a bit of a zoo there, so why don't you pick me up at two-thirty," I suggested.
"All right. I'll look forward to seeing you." Edward's voice softened a little. "I'm glad you called."
"I'm glad you can make it," I admitted.
"Have a good rest of the week, Bella."
"Thanks. You, too."
I hung up and stared down at my desk for a moment, slightly confused by the conversation and how relieved I was that he could make it.
For the rest of the afternoon, I helped one of the other lawyers with a particularly tricky case they were working on, and pushed Edward to the back of my mind. By the time I made it back to my office, I had a mountain of phone messages to return. As I started to go through the pile, Lauren paged me that Renee was on the phone.
With a heavy sigh, I answered the phone. "Isabella Swan."
"Isabella? It's your mother."
"Yes, Mother, how can I help you?"
"You need to pick me up today."
"Pick you up from where?" I asked warily.
"Dr. Strager's. I've had several procedures done today and I'm in no condition to drive."
Procedures. That meant more Botox injections, useless cosmetic procedures, and God knows what else. I wanted to shake her. "Why can't Eli take you home?"
"They won't release me to a non-family member, you know that. I assured them that Eleazar was perfectly capable of driving me home, but they won't allow it. It's ridiculous. Really, Isabella, is it asking too much for you to pick up your mother and drive her home after having surgery?"
Leave it to Renee to play the guilt card at any and all moments. Never mind what I had to do today or any thought of courtesy. No, I needed to drop what I was doing and go pick her up.
"What time?"
"Four-thirty, and don't be late. You know how I hate to wait." The tone in her voice was beginning to make my head hurt.
"Four-thirty? I wasn't even planning to leave today until seven. Are you sure there is no one else who can come?" I asked. I really didn't have time to just waste away my day running errands for Renee.
"Isabella, it's not as if the office will stop if you're not there. Your father is out of town and I need you."
"Fine, I'll be there." Resigned to the fact that my day had just been completely rearranged, I hung up without saying goodbye. I'd get an earful about it later, but I didn't have the energy to put up with her any longer. Sometimes I wondered why I bothered taking her calls other than the fact that she was my mother. Had it not been for wanting to make my father happy, I probably wouldn't have put up with most of the requests Renee asked of me.
I busied myself in my work for the rest of the day, scrambling to get as much done as possible. But my to-do list continued to grow and by the time I had to leave, I knew I would have to come back to work for at least several hours.
Once I was sitting outside Dr. Strager's building, I took a moment to steady myself. I hated that Renee had called me. I didn't have the energy to deal with her at the moment. She was tiring and often left me feeling completely in knots.
Renee and I hadn't always had such a strained relationship. In fact, growing up, I admired her like any daughter would their mother. She was warm and caring, and she and my father seemed to have the perfect relationship. But as I grew older, I started to see through my rose-colored glasses. She loved my father, but she loved herself more. It became apparent through the years just how shallow and self-centered she truly was. She loved the idea of being the perfect family who had it all together.
She constantly preached to me how, one day, I would get married, have a family, and be the perfect housewife. To Renee, that was life. Women belonged at home, not at work. She taught me to have a voice and how to use it, but only through poor example. She felt the need to assert her status in every situation and if you didn't recognize, it your neck was on the line.
By the time I hit high school, she and I had grown so distant from each other we hardly talked. Of course, I was still expected to play "perfect," and thus go to every charity function, benefit dinner, and any other thing where we had to be seen. But other than for appearance's sake, that was where it ended.
The thing about my mother, was that though she was a lovely woman, she constantly was seeking other's approval. Rather than just be content with the material things we had-which was far more than most-she wanted everyone to know all about it.
When Riley and I got together, she was ecstatic. She saw Riley not for the amazing man he was but for the wealth and status his family brought with him. Riley came from a well-off family that was well-connected in social and political circles. To Renee, the Biers' were just one more connection to being in the in-crowd she loved so much. She welcomed Riley to our family as "acceptable" and immediately inserted herself into his at any point possible. He had always told me not to worry about it, as he was dating me and not my mother, but I know he didn't care for her much. He tolerated her at best.
I was able to confide in him about the stress and pressures that Renee was constantly inflicting on me and he was always there to help me deal with it. She expected me to be someone, make something of myself in social circles in order to gain her approval. Though I placated her, at least he was always there to be with me.
When Riley and I broke up, Renee could never understand the choice I made. She couldn't accept the idea of loving someone enough to do what I did. She saw it as a mistake, that I blew my only chance at true happiness. To this day, she's made it her job in life to constantly remind me how much of a failure I am. I was never good enough without him—a comment not lost on me—and it ripped my heart open each time she brought it up. She just couldn't understand that there was something more to my decision.
I walked inside and checked in at the reception desk. The incredibly enhanced blonde at the desk made a face at me; I assumed it was an attempted smile.
"Miss Swan, your mother is just about ready. We'll bring her out in a moment."
Trying not to laugh, I replied, "Thank you."
"Here is all of the discharge paperwork, don't hesitate to call if you have any questions."
I took a seat and closed my eyes, leaning my head against the wall. I was so tired. When was the last time I had really slept well? Not since Riley's call and before that: the night I spent at Edward's. Thinking about the entire situation made me feel all twisted up. It was wrong to be thinking of Edward while still having feelings for Riley.
I liked Edward, genuinely liked him, but he wasn't going to take Riley's place in my heart. Besides, from the tone of his voice when I had called earlier, he was irritated with me. I wasn't even really sure why I had called him. I didn't blame him for being annoyed. I'd been acting almost bi-polar. One face for work—cool, calm, controlled—another for everyone else, and a third for when I was alone. That was the one that was shattering. I hardly knew who I was anymore.
There was a part of me that liked the way I felt with Edward. Not just the passion and the need, but he helped me relax, lift the burden of my thoughts. There was something about him that just made me feel lighter. Still, the way I'd been treating Edward wasn't at all fair to him.
"Are you sleeping, Isabella?"
I opened my eyes to see Renee sitting in a wheelchair. She hated them, but the surgeon's office required patients to be wheeled to the door if they'd had any sort of procedure involving anesthetics.
"No, just thinking, Mother. Are you ready to go?"
"I've been ready," she said testily.
She was being pushed by a pretty, young woman in scrubs. I stood up and thanked the woman before wheeling Renee outside and helping her into my car. She spent the ride home chatting excitedly about the newest innovations in plastic surgery and I gritted my teeth to stop the words I really wanted to say to her. I was so angry that she did this to herself, over and over again. But a conversation about that was better than a lecture about my life.
We pulled up to my parent's house in the Pacific Heights neighborhood. I looked it over carefully. I always loved the great view it had of the Bay. It was a five-bedroom house, more than the three of us had ever really needed, but I loved it. There was a large, beautifully landscaped garden out front and it had exceptionally tall ceilings and large windows. It was an open floor plan and decorated with light colors and gorgeous pieces of art. I had been happy growing up there.
Unfortunately, the reprieve from my mother's nagging lasted only until I had her in the house with Carmen fussing over her. Thank God for Carmen; I didn't know how I would have made it without her. She was Eleazar's wife and she had been a housekeeper for my parents as long as he had been their driver. I had always adored her growing up, and she had looked after me with a motherly concern. She was in her mid-sixties and she was still a beautiful older woman. She was probably at least ten years older than Renee, and her life had been far less pampered, but she had an inner calmness that I had grown to love over the years. Her thick, dark hair was streaked with white and her face heavily lined with wrinkles, but there was a serenity that my mother would never have.
Once Carmen had her settled into her bed and had her painkillers in hand, I excused myself.
"I think I'm going to head out if you're all set, Mother."
"Just a moment, Isabella. I wanted to talk to you about something."
"All right." Taking a deep breath, I warily took a seat on a chair by the bed.
"Isabella, I can't sit by and watch you throw your life away without saying something," Renee said. "Riley was your future, and you are going to regret pushing him away."
"I didn't push him away, Mother," I said with a tired sigh. "It was a hard decision. But I'm needed at the firm and Riley wants a future in politics. He has a great future in D.C.; I couldn't hold him back."
"Isabella, that's nonsense. Riley was successful, wealthy, connected, and perfect. All you had to do marry the boy and you would have been set. You don't need to work or prove yourself. You needed to take care of him. You're selfish for having pushed him away. You should be begging that man to take you back, not spend your days holed up in that office for hours on end."
"I don't want to leave the firm, I love it there."
"More than you love Riley, apparently." I closed my eyes for a moment, hurt by her words. "That's not fair," I said tightly.
"What about a family, Isabella? Don't you want to settle down and have a family?"
"Of course I do. But I'm not going to quit my job to become a stay at home mother and political wife. I have obligations here. I have a life here."
"Yes, I can see that. Some life it is, wouldn't you say? When you come to your senses, you will realize that you gave up on your best chance for a successful marriage. His family one of the most prestigious in the area."
"His family has nothing to do with it. I loved his family. But that has no bearing on our situation."
"You just need to face facts; you're not getting any younger and Riley was your only real chance for happiness."
I swallowed hard to fight back the tears. Her words hit just a little too close to home.
"I love you, Mother, but I can't do this right now. I have work to do." I stormed out of the house and didn't look back.
Upset, I made my way home instead of to work. I couldn't handle the thought of facing the people still in the office. Thankfully, I had brought home a portion of my work, so I could still get things done. It took me a while to pull myself together, but eventually I was able to shove my mother's painful words out of my mind and focus on my work.
I was good at it. I'd been doing it for years.
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