Landslide; Chapter Five

Jacob's point of view

"You couldn't stand to be around me when you joined the pack, where is this coming from?" I discovered my voice and she sat down at the ottoman at the end of my bed.

Realistically, I knew Leah already knew had feeling for me, but I didn't really understand the extent of them before now. I had deluded myself into thinking it was really nothing when she kissed me; just a one-time, confused occurrence. Now I realized that there was much more to it than that. She didn't just like me, she said she loved me. Maybe she got the two words confused, because surely Leah was still madly in love with Sam, no matter what the 'new feelings' she now felt were. Maybe this was just all a miscommunication in a way.

She frowned, not meeting my eyes. "I know I was a pain at first but when you let me stay, after that night..." She trialled off, frowning, remembering the events of the night that brought her to my pack. "You understood me, Jake. You were hurting over Bella and I was hurting over Sam and we had a common ground. Even though I wasn't happy about being the Cullen's lapdogs, well, it was nice being led by you. I don't know when exactly the feelings started. Over time, I guess. I had to hide it from you, of course, and Seth and then you imprinted and I knew it wouldn't matter anyway; I know it probably doesn't mean a whole lot considering you've imprinted, but it's hard keeping it bottled up, so now it's out in the open. I don't want to have secrets with you, you've been honest with me up until now and I feel like I should be honest, too."

Sam had been a little... tied up with Emily the night before she joined my pack. It was Leah's last straw to quitting his pack and coming to mine, now that she had finally got a choice to who she belonged with. I never thought she would actually be happy to have been able to choose me. I never thought I would be happy that she chose me.

I sighed, taking in all of the information. Leah Clearwater... Leah Clearwater had feelings for me. It was a hard thing to wrap my head around. I didn't want to be a jerk about it, but I wasn't exactly expecting this surge of emotion from her. I had to be honest, too. "I don't really know what to say... I imprinted, Lee..."

"I know," she said finally, crossing her legs and playing with a loose thread on her shirt. "I'm not even entirely sure if I even want to feel anything like this, yet, but my mind's telling me two completely different things."

I didn't know what to say, but I knew there was something going on with her. Leah had always been Sam's ex-girlfriend, though. That's just what she was. She was never a potential girlfriend; she was always Sam's. I was about to open my mouth to say something when she cut me off.

"Look, you always told Bella – from what I heard in your thoughts, that she could be normal with you; she didn't have to change to be with you like she would Edward, right?"

I shrugged, knowing where ever she was taking this conversation, she had put a lot of thought into it. "Yeah."

"Then being with Nessie doesn't make sense, Jake," she said, her words flowing freely and quickly from her lips; adamantly. "It just doesn't make sense. You'll have to change for her. Literally. You'll never be able to stop phasing if you're with her; you're pretty much immortal because she won't die and you will, Jake. Unless you keep phasing forever so that you can be with her forever. It goes against everything you used to believe in. Yeah, I get that imprinting makes everyone this sappy fool who will do anything for their imprint, even change everything they are and believe in, but you used to hate that, too. Before you imprinted, you hated that their lives didn't belong to them anymore. Just please consider that because logically, your imprint goes against everything you once said. You want a normal life, Jake. You always have. You don't want to keep phasin-"

"Stop," I said curtly. It wasn't an Alpha command, but she listened. Her words... God, they were too real, and too misplaced, now. Surely the fact that I imprinted didn't change me, I was still the same Jacob I always was, just happier. I knew where she was coming from, though because I had felt that way before and I still remember it. But that was over, now. I could be happy, right? I wanted things to be easy. "Don't tell me what I want, Leah."

But she was right. She was one hundred percent right. The only way this imprint would work is if I decided to... Well, never die of my own accord. It did go against everything I believed in... But was that really so bad? Nessie was my imprint and I had to protect her.

"You want to know something else?" She said, meeting my eyes, her words sharp. "I hate you for imprinting on that half-breed. That was the best thing about the pack when I joined, there were no imprints; no love-sick puppies running after someone that they didn't even get a choice to love."

"It wasn't my choice, Leah," I told her, trying to keep my own temper down so I could deal with hers. "Do you think I would have chose to imprint on a half-vampire, half-human spawn of the girl I used to love? No, I wouldn't. If I could have chosen my imprint it would have been someone normal."

"You don't have to love Nessie, Jacob," Leah said sadly. "Just like Sam didn't have to love Emily. Just be there for her, Jacob. Just... Protect her like a brother; like this, now, forever. Don't let your life be consumed with thoughts that aren't even yours."

Leah's point of view

I loved Jacob Black. I couldn't help it and I couldn't fight it anymore. I loved his heart, his mind and his maturity. I didn't want to watch him go off with Nessie. She wasn't right for him. But did that mean I wanted him to be with me... Well, I didn't really know.

"It's not that easy, Leah," Jacob said softly. "I know Sam said it, too, but it's true. Imprints ... They're... Well, they're strong."

"Forget it," I said softly. "You're the same as the rest of them." I got up, going over to the door, when Jacob spoke.

"Leah, don't start this, okay?"

"Start what, Jacob?" I asked, spinning around. "I'm so tired of being second best. You want to know something? When you imprinted you completely changed into the same person Sam did. You only care about that stupid half breed and that's it."

Jacob stood up, coming over to me. "Leah," he growled. "Please, keep your voice down. You're not second best. You're my Beta. You-"

"And Nessie comes before your Beta, Jacob. Don't even start this."

"Then don't turn into the same girl you were in Sam's pack!" Jacob yelled.

I looked at him for a long moment, and turned. I opened the door and went to leave, but before I could get out, Jacob took my hand and pulled back back, kicking the door shut with his foot. "Leah, look at me right now."

I had tears in my eyes, and I didn't want to look at him, but I held his gaze anyway. "What?"

"I understand where you're coming from, honestly I do. If I could change things, I would.-"

"I've heard that before, Jacob. Look, it's fine, I'll just stay out of your way like I said I would and keep to myself, is that good for you?" My words were laced with a bitterness I couldn't hold back and Jacob frowned.

He didn't respond with words, however. Instead, he leaned in, and kissed me. Flat out kiss on the lips. I felt myself falling into the soothing rhythm of his lips against mine; filing it to the back of my head to torture myself later on; the thought of how soft and sweet his lips were and the way his hand felt at the base of my spine, resting there. However, I pulled back. This wasn't fair.

"What was that?" I asked, regaining my speech.

Jacob frowned. "I'm sorry, Leah... You're just... I do care about you. Maybe it's not entirely in the way you want but don't treat me like I'm the bad guy. You do mean a lot to me, if you didn't you wouldn't be my Beta. Don't pretend like I'm out to get you, because I'm really not. I know I imprinted and I really don't want to hurt you but no matter what it feels like I'm going to end up hurting you. I don't want to be another Sam, I really, really don't. I wish things could be easier. Want to know something?"

I gulped and just nodded, losing my voice again, not really knowing what to say.

"I don't understand this imprint, either. You're all right; it doesn't make sense. I mean, I'm glad the imprint got me over Bella, but it's really... sick. Imprinting on her daughter. Like... I don't get it. I'm lucky that I don't have long to wait for her to grow – Not like Quil, but still. You're right, it doesn't make sense. I wish I could at least have a normal imprint, but that's not what happened. I don't know why but when I think of Nessie... I love her like a little sister, like I'm supposed to, but want to know a secret? I hate the Cullen's, just like Sam, but in a different, more intense way, for moving here and causing us all to phase and taking away all of our free will. If they hadn't come, none of us would have phased. We would all still be... Well, happy."

How he could feel anything toward the spawn besides love and happiness was beyond me. I lived in many imprints heads and knew what a life-altering, blah, blah, blah, feeling that was imprinting. "But she's your imprint."

"And she took away all sense of freedom I had. I can't do whatever I want when I want, Lee. I've always got to be checking on her for my own peace of mind, making sure she's okay and not hurting or cold or hungry. It's like I'm... I'm constantly freaking babysitting."

I smiled softly to myself at his words. Babysitting. I couldn't picture him running a daycare of kids, looking after them. He raised a brow at the smile on my face. "Sorry, I just... Picturing you babysitting a bunch of kids is pretty funny."

Even he cracked a smile, and chuckled. "Whatever, Clearwater. Point is, you're not wrong. I know it's a fucked up thing, but neither of us can change that and I truly am sorry. I don't want to hurt you, Lee. I don't want you to hate me. I do care about you, Lee."

I sighed, "I don't hate you, Jake. I'm just... angry. I feel like I deserve to be happy, too."

"You don't want to imprint, Lee," he told me seriously. "Fall in love the right way; the way you're used to. The normal way."

"I'm afraid that's what happened," I told him honestly. "And I'm still trying to deal with that."

My words were heavy and Jacob just stared at me for a long moment before I broke the silence. "I think I'm going to go away for a little while, Jake. I need a couple weeks to myself."

Jacob frowned. "Leah, don't leave. You know you can't break off on your own, come on."

I shook my head. "I'm going to come back, I'm smarter than that, I just think it'd be best if I took a little time for myself."

Jacob sighed, running a hand through his hair. Then, the phone rang. He didn't answer it, but Seth called up the stairs, informing Jake it was Carlisle and he needed to talk to him. "One second, okay?" He asked, pulling me over to his bed so I could sit down and he took the phone off of his night table.

"Hello?"

I could only hear one side of the conversation but Jacob's brow furrowed. "When? Today?"

A pause.

"We've been patrolling nightly and we haven't found anything strange. What did she see exactly?"

I wondered what was going on. I could tell it was pack business, but Jacob's worried tone worried me, too.

"Okay, we're on the way over."

Click.

"You're not going anywhere because I need my Beta. Alice thinks there are new vampires coming. She doesn't recognize them and doesn't know if they're a threat or not, but they know about the Cullen's and she saw them coming here."

I wasn't too worried about the Cullen's, honestly. They could hold their own ground without us. The volturi had just been a different circumstance. Part of me could care less if the hybrid got eaten by her own kind. "You have the guys, you'll be fine."

"I need you, Lee. I'm not going to be worried about your safety and try to figure out what this is all about. We're all going to the Cullen's right now, okay?"

And that was that. Jacob gestured for me to follow him down the stairs, though I stayed up in his room for a few minutes after he left, gone to tell the others. I squeezed the bridge of my nose and took a deep breath in. I wasn't getting out of here that easily and I realized my feelings for Jacob also weren't retreating quickly. I was stuck dealing with this head on.

It didn't take long for Jacob to run over to the Cullen's insisting we all come, too. The smell hit me from just outside their property and I sighed inwardly.

It's not that bad, Lee, Seth though.

It's pretty bad, I admitted.

We won't be long, Jacob promised.

As soon as we got to the house, we phased back, and clothed ourselves before walking up to the door, Jacob entering freely. Almost instantly, the hybrid was attached to Jacob.

"Jake!" She cried.

Jacob chuckled and wrapped one of his arms around her shoulders, which was difficult from their height difference. "Hey, Ness."

"Everyone's in the living room waiting for you guys," she said cutely, wrapping her arms around Jacob's legs.

I grimaced, trying to control my jealousy. It was ridiculous; I was jealous of a little girl who, although probably to my intelligence, looked twelve years old, now, growing more and more every day. Jacob led us into the family room and I opted to lean in the door frame, trying to stay away from the stench as much as possible. Jacob chuckled and brushed Nessie off after hugging her the right way and he crossed his arms over his chest. Everyone was in there, like the child had said.

"Do you think that these vampires are a threat?" He asked, Quil, Embry hanging back with me and Seth going up front to address the room with Jacob. They didn't mind the leeches as much as we did. Well, Quil and Embry didn't mind them so much as were weary of them, but whatever.

"We're not sure," Carlisle said, sighing. "All Alice saw was three, new vampires coming to Forks. New as in newborns."

"I wasn't told that," Jacob said unhappily.

"We were waiting until you came over," Bella said. "To tell you the whole story, but there isn't much to tell. We're not sure why they're coming, but Alice said she doesn't know them. Edward doesn't, either. They're newborns so we probably haven't come across them before."

"Newborns," Jacob scoffed. "Lovely. Until you know more, if you find out more, we'll double up our patrols. We'll get them before they get to you, don't worry." His words were more for Bella and Nessie than the comfort of the others.

"Thank you, Jacob," Edward said formally.

He nodded in response.

I looked over to the hybrid. I wondered if we could leave soon but I decided that Jacob wouldn't be going without a nice long heartfelt goodbye from the child. I felt like I was going to be sick, and not just because the house smelled unbearable. Jacob deserved better than that leech. He should be able to choose his future.

Edward caught my gaze. I forgot he could read my thoughts. Jasper exchanged a look with his brother, too. They knew how I felt for Jacob; Jasper could feel the jealousy rays flowing off of me and Edward had a direct link to my own thoughts. Ugh. Esme and Carlisle motioned everyone to go to the kitchen and I left the room quickly, going out the front door and walking over to the creek outside the Cullen's. I wasn't needed for pack issues and I figured I could get away from the strength of the stench inside the house but be close enough in case I was needed.

Jacob's point of view

The meeting was quick; myself and Carlisle decided any new information either of us found would be immediately displayed to the other, and that was that. Our patrols were picking up and the Cullen's would also watch the area. I had saw Leah leave the house and I assumed it was because of the stench and her general dislike of the Cullen's. I also thought it may have to do with Renesmee, though. The girl sitting in my lap happily. As we all got up from our seats, Edward spoke to me.

"Jacob? Can I talk to you for a moment?"

Edward's point of view

Leah was screaming. Not out loud, but her head was a mess. I had to do a little digging to realize why she hated my daughter so much. Usually her dislike of us all was constantly running through her mind when she was around, but this time it was almost all focused on Renesmee. Although her head, much like Rosalie's, was a terrible place to be, I wanted to know what was going on, and I rooted through her thoughts quickly.

Ah, Jacob.

I saw the kiss replaying in her head before she left; when she kissed Jacob, and then, when Jacob kissed her. So the female Clearwater had a crush on Jacob. That's why she hated Ness so much; Jacob's imprint.

Jacob gave me a carefree look and then shrugged. "I guess, what's up?"

I led him out and into the living room. "Leah likes you," I said. "And I know you already know that. Her thoughts are... Well, loud and clear."

Jacob glared at me. "Why can't you stay out of peoples heads for five damn minutes?"

"I don't try, Jacob. Well, not initially. Her thoughts were so loud when she saw Renesmee... She really dislikes her. I just want to know what the future holds. Right now Nessie only looks twelve years old, but when she finally stops growing..." I shuddered. "I know that this imprint is strange for your kind but I want to see where your head's at with it."

"Can't you just look into my thoughts, too?" he said unhappily.

"I'd rather not," I answered honestly.

Jacob sighed. "Look, I don't know why any of this happened. All I know is I've got this beautiful little girl to protect, as her big brother, as her imprinter, and then I have this other... beautiful girl that is so... fragile and hurt that I'm terrified I'm going to do more damage to. I want to protect them both; I have to. Ness is my imprint, and Leah's my Beta. But I'm afraid I can't protect one without hurting the other."

I nodded. "That's understandable, Jacob. Look, I don't want to see any of you hurt; especially my daughter, which is why I brought this up. She thinks the world of you, Jacob, though I'm not sure why," I half-joked, a smirk forming on his lips. "But I see Leah's thoughts, too. She doesn't think an imprint should control anyone and I understand that, as well. I know you're going to have a hard time balancing them both, and trying to be what they need you to be, but you can only love one in the way a man can love a woman." I gritted my teeth thinking about that being my daughter. "And only you can decide that."

"I don't even know how I feel about Leah, yet," Jacob said strongly. "It's just... weird. I don't even know if I have options. Not with the imprint."

Carlisle overheard the conversation from the doorway as he was passing by and frowned. "You always have options, Jacob. Just please pick the right one for you because if you don't it may end up hurting more than just one person."

Authors note: I want to give a big thanks to my own Beta, whose penname is teamjacob2012 for editing my work and giving me lots of feedback and suggestions! Also a big thanks to all of you who have reviewed! I appreciate all of the kind words and constructive criticism! (:

Don't forget to review and if you have any suggestions of your own, please PM them to me or leave them in your review! Constructive feedback is always appreciated!

-Dramaticfield