Warnings:Chapter contains a homosexual incestual relationship and sexual content between two women. If you don't like it, don't read it.
Rating: M
Summary:. What happens when she gets her wish and Tegan finds herself in an alternate reality where Sara is her girlfriend, and not her sister? Will be a LONG fic, updated often.
A/N: Sorry for the long delay. I went right from Tennis camp to College and it's been pretty busy. Thanks for all the reviews. Hope this chapter makes up for my being away so long. Enjoy and review. Hopefully it won't be so long before the next one! Than you all for being so patient!
Disclaimer: COMPLETELY FICTIONAL!
Chapter 9- Perfect
Tegan's POV
I let the chord ring out, my eyes glued to my wife who was sitting behind the glass.
"What do you think?" I asked
I saw it: that smile. She didn't have to say it, because I already knew she was swooning over the new song from that gigantic grin on her face. Either way, her voice came through loud and clear over the studio headphones I had on
"I love it. It's so different from what you usually write." She blushed and bit her bottom lip.
She knew the song was for her. The first that I'd ever written for her.
"I want to add a few cool drum rolls and a kind of dark bass line. Maybe a little on the keyboard" I added, casually starting to take my guitar off.
"No" she replied very sternly.
It made me stop, freeze mid-motion, and cock my head sideways like a puppy. I wasn't used to hearing that from her, especially when it came to my songs. Usually she'd give constructive criticism, such was Sara's way. It was never a straight out: no. But this was.
"What?" I asked
"No. I like it when it's just you. Simple, beautiful, you and a guitar" she followed up.
I gulped and said the only thing I could after being so taken aback.
"Okay."
I put my guitar on the stand, and walked out of the studio, into the hallway, promptly entering the control room via the French doors at the end of the hallway. She was in one of the office chairs, sitting on one leg, while the other was pulled to her chest when she swiveled around to see me.
Walking in, I dropped a kiss on her forehead as she shut her eyes and just accepted it, giving my back a pat.
"Ready to be done here?" I asked
She nodded and I scooped her into my arms, helping her to her feet in a big hug. I felt my whole body relax. Stress didn't live here anymore. A feather light kiss was dropped on my cheek as I let out a sigh and let her escape my embrace. Sara grabbed both my hands and gave me a dazzling smile.
"I have a surprise for you" she told me.
"Oh really?" I asked, raising an eyebrow "Is this one of your homemade gifts?"
She nodded and I rolled my eyes while smiling. I'd seen her give multiple people homemade gifts over the course of the years and had always found it cheap and dumb, until there was the prospect of getting my own. My heart lit on fire as she nodded. I hadn't gotten a homemade Sara gift in a long time. She leaned up and gave me a quick kiss.
"Let me go get it" she said, standing up.
I nodded and backed off, letting her get up, and out of the chair. I took her seat when she did, and watched as she walked out the door. Letting out a sigh, I turned to the mixing board and started playing what I'd just recorded. My first love song. I smiled as I heard the guitar intro come to a close and my voice utter the first words of the verse. It wasn't perfect yet. I could hear the shakiness in my voice from being so nervous that Sara was listening. Two hands wrapped around my neck, as I felt her weight against my shoulders and a kiss on the side of my neck. She was holding something out for me to see. I got a good look at the object. I recognized it instantly as an ovulation test. Every cell in my body vibrated with excitement, as my mind processed that it was positive. I heard the laugh as I let out a high pitched squeak, spinning around immediately.
"You're ovulating!" I exclaimed
Sara nodded, and took a seat in my lap, kissing me softly. I let my heart soar in connection with her. I could feel her practically bouncing in my lap. If a month ago you would have told me that I'd be here, with Sara, excited about having a baby together I'd have probably punched you. Yet, here we are. I slowly break the kiss and revel in the feeling as Sara leans her forehead against mine. Leaning forward, I drop a light kiss on her nose. She lets out a happy sigh as she closes her eyes.
"We should go see Emy" I say.
She nods and drops her head to my shoulder, snuggling into me. I've come to treasure these moments. It was such a comfortable feeling having her cuddle close. I put a hand under her shirt, on her stomach, and just let it heat her skin. She nuzzled my neck, letting out a low moan.
"I love it when you do that" she whispered.
I smiled wide and kissed her cheek, sliding my hand around her side, to her back. I gave her cheek one last kiss before reaching over to the desk, and swiping my phone. Settling back in, I dialed Emy's number as Sara drew lazy patterns on my collarbone with her index finger.
Sara's POV
The car ride to Emy's office felt like it took an eternity. I really should have been nervous, but all I could think about was Tegan and how exciting it was that little tiny half hers would be inside of me. The idea made me giddy. Anyone else, I would be so grossed out. I held her hand the entire ride. I was finally on the table, my feet in the stirrups, holding her hand again. I took a deep breath and squeezed hard. She looked at me and gave a soft smile.
"At least you don't have a giant needle to deal with" she joked.
I smiled and opened my arms, indicating my wanting a hug. She happily obliged and moved forward, wrapping her arms around me.
"I am so excited" I whispered.
She chuckled, and gave me one last squeeze before letting go.
"You know that the chances of it taking the first time are few and far between, right?" she asked
I shrugged "I don't really care" I ran a hand along her cheek, my eyes glued to hers "having any part of you inside of me makes my heart swell."
I watched as her face turned to show her heart melting. She always was a sucker for romantic words.
"I love you" she said plainly.
"I love you too, baby" I replied, and leaned forward giving her a quick kiss.
Emy knocked.
"Come in!" I exclaimed.
Emy did and Tegan rose to give her a hug.
"Hey guys. Finally the day, eh?" she asked
Tegan smiled wide and nodded.
"Look at THAT smile! Lets get started" she said, walking over to me. She placed a hand on my gown-covered knee. "How's it goin?"
"So good. I've been waiting for today for a while" I told her.
Emy smiled, and sat down in the rolley chair, putting two jars down on the tray. She draped a blanket over my lower half, and looked up.
"Ready?" she asked
I looked over at Tegan who took my hand. I nodded, then felt the butterflies creep up, and the nervousness I should have been feeling all along hit me. I had a moment of panic, feeling my breathing increase and my heart beat skip a few beats. Emy had her back to us, as she got ready. Luckily Tegan caught on and locked her eyes on mine, a warm hand moving to move against my tummy. I let out a sigh as calm almost instantly flooded over me. She smiled.
"Everytime. You okay?" she asked as she gently rubbed my midsection.
My eyes closed and I nodded, taking her free hand and lacing our fingers together. She slowly lifted my hand to her lips and gave the back of my hand a warm, wet kiss. I closed my eyes and just felt her presence next to me. I kept them closed, as I heard Emy speak.
"We'll do the first round in the office, but since Tegan's so fucking fertile, there's enough if you two perhaps…wanted to take some home?"
I felt Tegan's hand tighten around mine. I looked up at her and nodded. I saw her smile expand.
"Fuck yes!" Tegan replied to Emy, causing Emy to chuckle.
"Alright then. Sara, are you ready? This may be a bit uncomfortable" Emy told me.
I felt Tegan run her thumb over the back of my hand and nodded, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. I felt the cold of the metal as the backs of my heels hit the stir-ups. Tegan must have felt my body tense, because her free hand was on my stomach again. I took a deep breath and felt the warmth of her hand melt away the anxiety.
"Here we go" said Emy.
I didn't feel anything for the first bit. I let out a small whimper when I felt something resist inside of me.
"Just at your cervix, try and relax" Emy told me.
I nodded and looked up at Tegan, searching for her eyes. I didn't have to look far because she was watching me intently. She moved the hand from my stomach and gently ran it through my hair.
"I'm right here SaSa, right here" she comforted me.
I nodded and felt the discomfort ease as I figured Emy must have gotten passed my cervix. I almost sighed of relief. Tegan kissed the top of my head and I let my eyes close.
"There we go. All done. I'm going to pull the catheter out and just stay in that position for a while. I'll come get you when it's time." She looked at Tegan "You, don't aggravate the sample!"
Tegan acted shocked and Emy just laughed and walked out. I reached up Tegan's arm, pulling her close to me. I was met with a smile as she took a seat in the chair next to the examination table, and rested a hand on my thigh, still holding my hand. I closed my eyes and put a hand on my tummy. Little half Tegans were in there right now. She was inside of me. I felt the tears come. Tegan was quickly on her feet and I wrapped my arms tightly around her neck. She rubbed my back gently.
"Hey, hey baby, what's wrong?" she asked
"Nothing, absolutely nothing" I replied.
"Then why the tears?"
"I'm just so happy" I told her, earning a small kiss on the side of my neck.
"Are you sore?" she asked
I shook my head.
"No, T, really I'm fine" I assured her.
I felt her sigh and kiss my cheek. She whispered in my ear.
"I can't wait to go home and make love to you. This is great, but I really want to be the one to get you pregnant. I want to release inside of you as you come all around me. I want to feel your walls sucking me in."
I felt my whole body shudder and I couldn't help but kiss her. She held my head gently, running her fingertips over the tiny hairs on the nape of my neck as we glided our lips and grazed our tongues. She gently broke the kiss and kissed the tip of my nose. My eyes closed as I panted. I bit my bottom lip and let the heat rise inside my core. I heard her chuckle and rub my tummy.
"That really got you wound up, eh?" she asked
I nodded and opened my eyes to see her smiling back at me. I pulled her face closer and kissed her again. When I broke the kiss, I playfully pushed her away.
"Don't get too ahead of yourself, Romeo. We've still got to go grocery shopping" I reminded her.
She groaned and I chuckled, rubbing up her wrist, to her forearm. Emy walked in and handed Tegan a small jar with a blue top.
"There you are. You guys are all set. Invite me to the baby shower?" Emy asked with a smile, patting my leg.
"Of course. Thanks Emy" I laughed.
Emy nodded and left the room. I swung my legs out of the stirrups and hopped to my feet. Tegan handed me my underwear and pants. I slowly slipped them on. I turned around as she gently untied the back of the gown from around my neck, running both hands down my now exposed back. I couldn't help but lean backwards into her. I let myself fall backwards into that warmth as she wrapped me up in her arms. I let out a happy little sigh and felt warm lips press to my neck. We stayed like this for a few heartbeats, then I pulled away to get dressed.
We left Emy's office all smiles and holding hands, and walked across the street to the grocery store. It tended to be okay in here. Most people left us alone, which is why we kept coming back. As always, everyone turned to look as we walked in. I smiled and waved awkwardly, blushing red as we moved passed the first few displays, and grabbed a cart. I felt Tegan's hand securely on my lower back as I pushed the cart. I turned to her.
"Did you bring the list?" I asked
"We don't need a list, it's fine" she responded
"Tegan! You need to bring the list! Watch, now we're gonna get to the eggs and we'll look at each other and be like 'Did we need eggs?' and we'll totally not need eggs, but neither one of us will remember so we'll buy eggs. Then when we get home, we have 2 dozen eggs." I explained my frustration "We need the list".
"Okay, fine. Next time I'll bring the fucking list." She replied, then sighed.
I looked around at all the people watching us and felt embarrassed. I had a moment of panic, and reminded myself to breathe. I was effectively freaking out inside. Tegan must have noticed because she wrapped an arm around me and turned my head to face her. I looked into those eyes.
"Hey, Sara. Stay with me. I'm sorry. It's okay. Just keep breathing." she whispered softly.
I nodded and paid attention to the warm hand on my side, rubbing my skin through my shirt gently. I felt it all calm, then said the first thing that came to mind:
"I just said the word eggs like 18 times."
Tegan chuckled and nodded, rubbing my back "Yeah, ya did!"
I looked around, and the people who'd been staring were now going about their day. I let out one last breath and grabbed a box of strawberries, putting them in the cart and moving on. I saw Tegan's smile out of the corner of my eye before she went off to grab some vegetables. I took a moment to close my eyes and take a breath. I shook it off with a laugh and looked to the apples.
Tegan's POV
I put the last of the groceries in the fridge and looked over to Sara, who was washing a pan from breakfast. Making my way over, I wrapped my arms around her waist and stepped into her. She stopped and leaned back into me. I smiled wide and shut my eyes, letting that familiar warmth overcome me. My arms tingled and I kissed the side of her face. I could feel her smile as I laid my cheek against hers.
I felt my heart pour out. How could holding someone like this feel so perfect? I was sure the butterflies would fade. After all we've been in this world for a solid month now, living together. But they just got stronger. Sara did things to me with just a touch of the hand that people couldn't do while fucking me. I felt…alive and ecstatic. I felt like I was in a perpetual fall down a warmed waterfall, with no bottom. It was like the sun was in my arms. Have you ever woken up next to sunlight? Not just to sunlight on you form the window, but it plastered all along you. It's…words do not exist. It's like nothing you've ever felt before.
Sara turned around in my arms and tucked me into her chest, holding me close right there in the kitchen. She rubbed up and down my back as she kissed the top of my head. We just held each other.
"I love you" she told me.
I smiled wide and hugged her tighter "I love you so much" I replied.
She let out a happy, little sigh and I gently pulled away to give her a soft, gentle kiss on the lips. Putting a hand on her tummy, I looked over at her.
"What does it feel like?" I asked
"What does what feels like, babe?" she asked right back
"Having…sperm inside of you. Can you feel it?"
Sara laughed at me.
"Can you feel it? Tegan that's preposterous. They're microscopic. I'll tell you though, that the idea that a part of you is inside of me right now is…" she paused and smiled happily, dropping her head to my shoulder and pulling me in for another hug. "it makes me feel warm and tingly everywhere. I've never been this happy. I've been content, but this Teegs, since I've been with you, it's like pure joy. I don't know how I could have ever considered myself happy before this. You're everything, babe."
I felt the tears roll down my face as I swallowed hard and held onto her.
"I think that's the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me" I told her.
She kissed my neck a few times and held the back of my head, letting me cry into her.
"Happy tears?" she asked
I nodded and felt a few more kisses, then calloused fingertips run up the nape of my neck, into the thick of my hair. I slowly pulled back to kiss her, sniffling through my tears. I found her lips and devoured them. I felt my heart throb against my chest, and swell towards her. She ran a hand over top of the skin, and pushed off my unbuttoned flannel shirt. I clung to her again, running my hands up her shirt, and taking it off, then she quickly took off my t-shirt. We crashed back together in a sweet collision of bodies, all warmed flesh. She pressed her moist, wet lips to my neck as her fingers unbuttoned my jeans. I threw my head back as I let the fire spread through my body. She plunged her hand eagerly down my underwear, and brushed against my clit as I gasped sharply, digging my fingertips into her shoulders. She pulled away.
"Is this okay? Do you want me to stop?" she asked.
I shook my head "Fuck no. Please Sara, I want you so badly." I relied, shaking.
She smiled and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around her neck, and let her unzip my jeans, so I could kick them off. I let her take me down to the floor and lay me down gently. She pressed herself on top of me as my hands moved up her back to unclasp her bra. I snapped it off and she tossed it aside. I broke the kiss and lowered my head to take one of her nipples into my mouth. She moaned loudly and I flicked my tongue over the nub, using my hand to stimulate its twin. Sara dove back under my boyshorts, and rubbed up my length. I abandoned her breast automatically and bit my bottom lip, my eyes instinctively closing. When I opened them, I saw her smiling down at me before she looped her thumb under the waistband and got rid of them completely. She kissed me softly, then stood up, leaving me laying on the floor.
I watched as Sara unbuttoned her jeans, and slid them off with her underwear. I stared in awe at the art of her body. The way her muscles moved just under her skin and her bones followed. As she kicked the last leg off, she kneeled back on the floor, straddling one of my legs. I sat up to meet her and felt my bra come undone by one skillful hand. My nipples instantly hardened at the chill in the air and from the prior stimulation. I caught her eyes and pleaded with mine.
"That look. I love when you give me that look" she said, smiling at me.
Sara leaned back into me and caught my top lip between hers, laying me back down gently. I felt her hand contact my wet, heated core again and I couldn't hold in the gasp. I threw my head back and arched my back. Sara's tongue was rolling in and out of the dip my collarbone created. I felt shockwaves shake me from the inside out, and her fingers aimed lower, teasing my entry. I gripped her shoulder hard and whimpered.
"Please, Sara." I pleaded.
She nodded and slowly entered me. My mouth hung open as I felt each delicious millimetre of her fingers push into me. It was so sweet. My legs bent at the knee, and I felt lips kiss my cheek. I held her tighter to me, until she filled me up. Sara moved around, kissing to the crinkle in my forehead.
"You okay?" she asked
"Oh fuck yes. This feels so fucking good" I replied.
I was rewarded with her curling her fingers inside of me. My body jumped and I felt my core melt. I was hers. Completely hers. She must have sensed that I was extra sensitive right now, because she moved slowly and gently. I wrapped my legs around her, and she gave up on holding herself up on her arms, collapsing onto me. I moaned at her slight weight. I was cut off by a set of lips softly against mine. She curled her fingers again and it made me shiver. She kept the kiss soft, and I couldn't help but dig my nails into her back as I felt myself tightening up.
"You feel so amazing Tegan. I think I might die" Sara whispered to me.
"You?" I panted
She smiled and kissed the side of my face, adding a little weight behind the next gentle thrust. My toes curled and I let go of her back, slapping my hands against the tile of the kitchen floor. My eyes shut tightly as my body tensed. One more thrust, and my hip bucked wildly as lights flashed in front of my eyes. I floated above my body, but could feel my eyes roll back and my voice yell out.
"Fuck! Oh fuck, Sara!"
Sara just kept the slow, gentle pace and kissed all over my face. Everything in my body relaxed and the orgasm that had ripped through me eased up. I was limb and numb, on the kitchen floor. Sara rolled off of me, pulling me with her. I was a rag doll. My eyes were closed, my body was pleasantly numb, and I was half asleep. My ear was pressed to her chest, and I could hear the clear beat of her heart. I couldn't help but drift off to sleep. It wasn't for long, because a few moments later Sara's lips on my forehead woke me up.
"Tegan, I know you're tired, but lets nap in our bed. C'mon babe."
I felt her start to move and I followed with a half effort. The tile was hard and cold. I wrapped my arm around Sara's shoulder and she wrapped hers around my waist, letting me lean onto her. She directed us to our bed and let me collapse on the bed before getting in on her side. The bed felt so good. It was soft and warm, and smelt like Sara. I curled up to her immediately as her hands ran through my hair and down my arm.
"Feel good?" she aksed
I gave a sleep smile, nodded, and answered groggily
"So fucking good. That was…amazing."
"That was really hot!" she said.
I have a half chuckled and she kissed my forehead again, pulling that warm comforter around us.
"I love you, Tegan."
I mumbled an 'I love you' and drifted to sleep, listening to the dynamics of her heartbeat and breathing. This was perfect. I get to do this whenever I want. I love life.