Warnings: TRIGGERS IN THIS CHAPTER!TRIGGER WARNING! TRIGGER WARNING! TRIGGER WARNING! CONTAINS SCENES OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, RAPE, AND MURDER. Chapter contains a homosexual incestual relationship and sexual content between two women. If you don't like it, don't read it.
Rating: M
Summary:. What happens when she gets her wish and Tegan finds herself in an alternate reality where Sara is her girlfriend, and not her sister? Will be a LONG fic, updated often.
A/N: I get that some of you aren't happy with the direction this is going, but this is the story. I didn't write explicitly about the unravelling of it, because it's the fallout that's important to the story. This is going to change the dynamic of the relationship and is necessary to later plots and twists. Hopefully you can accept this. I'm leaving the trigger warnings up right now. There's no new violence, rape, or murder, but I understand how sometimes just the mention of the feelings and such associated with them being mentioned can trigger individuals. I'm not trying to mentally harm anyone here.
That being said, here's the next chapter. Read, Enjoy, Review.
Disclaimer: COMPLETELY FICTIONAL!
In case you missed it: TRIGGER WARNING! CONTAINS SCENES OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, RAPE, AND MURDER.
Chapter 13 – I Didn't Do It! I Swear!
Sara's POV
It was bright. I knew this before I opened my eyes. Over the past few months, I've perfected the art of looking through the tiniest slits so it looked like I was still sleeping. Only when I did this, I was in a hospital. My eyes flew open and I looked around, my memory flooding back. I closed my eyes again as my world spun, nausea taking over. I felt the vomit coming up and expected to feel the wetness in my lap, but somehow, someone had gotten a receptacle under me. I violently lost the contents of my empty stomach, then bit my bottom lip from whimpering as it receded. That's when I felt it. The presence. Her presence. The warmth surrounded me and my heart swelled. I looked up and met those eyes. A million nightmares flashed through my mind and I swallowed hard, my heart rate picking up from fear, instead of love: triggers being sent off left, right, and center. She anticipated this, and backed off, retreating back into the far corner. I felt the warmth go with her, but so did the panic. I took a moment, closed my eyes, and focused on steadying my breathing.
She wasn't going to hurt me. This was my wife, not the monster from before. This was MY Tegan. I could feel it. Somehow she'd…switched back. What about the other Tegan? What if she came after us? She could…she could hurt my wife. I looked down at my stomach and bit my bottom lip, my body shaking as I felt the pain overcome me and the tears start to form. I needed Tegan right now. I shut my eyes tightly. And opened my arms towards her. She was in them so fast I think she ran. I kept my eyes tightly shut and focused on the feeling of home surrounding me. It wasn't long until I'd settled into her body. I inhaled her scent. Her wonderful, Tegan smell. I finally let myself go and I sobbed hysterically. She held me tightly to her chest, getting on the bed and cocooning me into her. I let myself melt, and just be surrounded. I felt safe. I felt so safe. It felt amazing to feel safe. A weight lifted, and I nuzzled deeper into her chest.
"I've got you, Sasa" She whispered into my ear in a husky voice.
"Never leave me again" I choked out, between sobs.
I was answered with a hug. Then it hit me: she didn't know. Was I even still…had I lost her? I couldn't…didn't have words. My hand searched blindly for hers, and when I felt it, I grabbed it and guided it to my stomach, right atop the tiny bump. I felt her take in a shaky breath and I felt hot tears on my scalp.
"She's still with us, Sare. She's a fighter" Tegan managed to whimper into my hair "Just like you. My two survivors."
I hugged Tegan's middle tighter and we sat and cried, until I fell asleep. I fell into the deepest sleep I had in a while, finally feeling safe.
Tegan's POV
I felt her quickly drift off. How long had it been since she'd had actual, restful sleep? When the doctor told me that the baby was still with us, my heart hit the wall. Sara was pregnant. Sara had endured God knows what, pregnant. I kissed the top of her head, saying a silent thank you for the fact that she was here, and I was here and that were both okay. Only, we weren't.
I could feel the nagging of the situation in the back of my mind, but it wasn't allowed to come out right now. Right now I needed to be here for her. I could deal with my shit later. But the blood, the look in my cohort's eyes. The feel of bones caving and snapping. The violence. It stayed with me. I shook it off, and let the feeling sit with me as I held her. Not now, Tegan. Not now.
Fuck, why couldn't I have found a way back sooner? I dropped my lips to her head again. She smelt different on the surface, but if I focused, I could inhale the sweet enchantment of Sara's natural smell. Since I was a kid, I've been smelling her. It was home. She was my home. She always had been. I gently rubbed up and down her arm, letting our skin mingle and get reacquainted.
"I love you so much" I whispered to her as she slept. "I can't imagine life without you. I've never had to. These two months were too much time apart. I want to fall asleep with you every night and wake up to you every morning for the rest of our lives."
The doctor appeared in the doorframe and I reluctantly, gently eased out from under Sara, letting her rest on the pillow, and bringing the blanket up to her chin.
Once my feet carried me outside, I wiped the tears from my face with the back of my sleeve. That's when I saw the police officers. Two of them, standing in the hallway. I gulped as they stepped forward.
"What is this?" I asked
"We have some questions for you, Mrs. Quin" the one officer said "now you can come willingly, or we can cuff you and walk you out of the hospital".
I gulped again, sandpaper coating my throat. I looked back at Sara. She shouldn't be alone. She needed someone. I turned back to the officers.
"I'm going to co-operate, I have nothing to hide, but let me make a few calls to get some family here for my wife. She shouldn't be alone right now. She needs support" I told them, coolly, wiping away a few more tears that leaked.
The officer who had spoken to me nodded and stepped back as I pulled out my cell phone. I dialed mum's number.
"Tegan! Haven't heard from you in a while. How are things baby girl?" she asked, bubbly.
I swallowed hard and the tears came.
"Mum, can you come to the hospital?" I asked, phlegm bubbling in my throat.
"What happened?" She asked, as I heard her grab her keys.
"Sara. Sara's hurt badly. I have to go to the police station, and someone should be with her"
"Oh god! Is she okay? What happened?" she asked.
"Mum, I can't really talk right now. She's alright, just please get here" I told her.
"I'm on my way. I love you baby girl. Take care of yourself. I'll make sure Sara's taken care of" she told me calmly.
I nodded, eventhough she couldn't see me "Thanks mum. I'll see you soon" I told her then hung up.
I dialed Emy's number, not surprised when she didn't pick up. I left a message.
"You probably hate me, and that's understandable, but Sara needs you right now. She's in the hospital and I know she'd feel more comfortable if you were around. Please Emy, for her. Anyways, I won't be around for a few hours…possibly more so you don't have to worry about running into me."
I hung up and looked at the officers.
"Alright then. Lets go" I said stalwartly.
Inside, my stomach churned. I was going to pay for her mistakes. I had to find a way around this. There was no way I was going to let her take more time from me from Sara. My feet carried me with them outside, as my mind raced.
Sara's POV
I woke up to a gasp. I opened my eyes to see mum in the doorway. I felt around for Tegan, and felt my stomach churn when I didn't feel her.
"Sara! What happened?" mum asked.
I groaned and opened my eyes.
"Where's Tegan?" I asked
"She had to go, but she called me to stay with you. I brought some banana bread."
I gulped and looked around. Tegan's not here. What if the other Tegan's back? No, she wouldn't have called mum to sit with me. I closed my eyes and focused. When I didn't feel the emptiness, I sighed happily and let myself relax as mum offered me a piece of banana break, I happily took it.
"Thanks" I said.
I munched on it, my stomach still uneasy.
"What happened?" she repeated.
I didn't know how to answer that. A Tegan from another dimension was stuck here and blamed me. For the passed 2 months she's been sexually, physically, and emotionally abusing me. She tried to kill me and the baby…oh yeah, I'm pregnant by the way. Then somehow I woke up and the real Tegan was back. No. But I couldn't lie. I bit my bottom lip and acted like I was still chewing, as my mind worked overtime to try and come up with something.
"Someone broke in. They assaulted me, and all I remember is waking up here to Tegan" I told her.
"Well, the police will find out who did this. Tegan's helping them right now" she told me.
"Tegan's at the police station?" I asked
Mum nodded. I panicked. Which Tegan did they have? As hard as I knew it would be for me to see Tegan everyday and my mind not to jump to the passed 2 months, but to not have her around would be worse. She needed to be home with me. What if they found out that Tegan did this? We can't tell them it was the wrong Tegan Quin. Where IS the other Tegan? Does my Tegan know? I make a mental note to ask her when she comes back. What is she going to tell the police?
That's when Emy flew into the room.
"Sara!" she exclaimed "Oh god, what did she do to you?"
I gulped. Emy knew about the abuse. She'd been by. Tegan tried making out with her, but she refused. She'd caught a glimpse of the bruises, and pulled me aside to ask about them. I told her I'd fallen down the stairs. Cliché, I know. What was I going to say? I really didn't want to be Teganless. As horrible as it was, at least I still got to see her face every day.
Emy grabbed my chart. I watched as her eyes froze over the line I knew she had no idea about. I bit my bottom lip.
"Emy" I tried to plead.
She looked up at me, horrified "Sara."
Her eyes gleamed as I saw the tears. "Emy, I can explain…" I tired to plead but the tears fell from her eyes.
"What's going on?" mum chimed in.
Emy took a deep breath and looked at me. I shook my head slightly. Emy closed her eyes and turned to mum.
"Can you give us a minute?" She asked mum
"No! Sara, what's going on?" she asked
"Mum, please. I promise I'll tell you later. Right now, I need to talk to Emy about it" I said, trying not to look her in the eye.
Mum looked pissed, and angrily snatched her purse and stomped out of the room. This was something Tegan and I had to tell her together. This should be happy news. She'd be thrilled. I didn't want her to have to hear about it in the light I'm sure Emy is going to shine on it. Emy looked at me, looking hurt.
"I wanted to tell you" I told her.
"Wanted? Sara, I'm your OB! You should have been in the moment you suspected!"
"I…I couldn't" I dropped my eyes further down, feeling so ashamed and helpless.
"Because of her! You can't let her get away with this!" Emy said sternly.
"Emy, it's not like that. You don't understand. She's different now." I explained
"Sara, no she's not. Stop making excuses for her or thinking she's going to change. She abused you! She tried to kill you!"
"Emy, I'm being serious. She's not the same anymore. She's a different person. That wasn't my Tegan. Please, believe me."
"Do you know how you sound right now, Sara? You need help."
I wanted to tell her the truth, but that would just get me a one way ticket to the 4th floor of this hospital, so I stayed silent.
"Do you want me to do a rape kit?" she asked, sighing.
I shook my head.
"Will you let me examine you? Make sure everything's okay? I know Dr. Hart already did, but well…"
"Yes! Please! I'd feel better if you did too." I told her.
She nodded, and started on the head to toe. I saw her start to distance herself as she prodded the bruises on my neck, the deep, infected cuts on my wrists, the welts all over my body, then the patched up knife wound on my stomach.
"I want to get a more thorough ultrasound done. Make sure they stitched up your uterus properly, and that the amniotic sac's still okay."
I nodded as she continued. I closed my eyes and bit my cheek as she traveled lower. She sensed my discomfort and stopped, just nodding.
"I want to keep a close eye on you, Sare. I know you say you think she's different now, but… It's my job to make sure you and this baby are healthy. I'm going to recommend therapy sessions, and will be making weekly home calls to keep an eye on things. Remember Sara, it's not just you anymore. You've got a little one you need to care for."
I nodded, a few tears slipping.
"You're lucky you weren't further along. She could have hit something vital." Emy paused. " You know I'm here for you, right? I just want what's best for you. You say the word and I'll testify against her."
"No. God now, Emy. I love her. She didn't do this." I reminded her.
Emy shook her head, frustrated. "Well the police will decide that".
Tegan's POV
I was in a room with just a table and a few chairs. I had Lindsey next to me, and was looking two police officers in the eye. I had refused to speak without a lawyer present. Lindsey's the only lawyer I knew. It'd been an hour of questions so far, and they weren't letting up.
"So where were you again, when this so called "intruder" was in your home, violating your wife?" The one officer asked.
"I told you, I was outside, on the boat. Are we done yet? Can I please go see my wife?" I asked, tired of the questions.
"You seem very eager to get back. Do you not want her to tell the doctors something?" The officer asked
"She can say whatever she likes! I'm worried because she was just assaulted by some freak and is pregnant and scared and needs emotional support right now!" I started to stand up, and Lindsey's hand on my lower back reminded me who I was speaking to and what situation I was in. I felt my heart race, and I wanted to hit someone. I'm usually not this hot headed, but nobody messes with Sara, and nobody keeps me from her.
There was a knock on the door and the officer walked over. The person who'd knocked whispered something and the officer nodded, then looked at me.
"Mrs. Quin, you're free to go. We'll be in touch." He said, with a smirk on his face.
I looked at Lindsey who was getting up, and gathering her things. She nodded at me, and I slowly stood back up and made for the door.